quote:

ORIGINAL: Focus50

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

Actually, Focus, you're looking at it more from a singular position aspect.

Yes, I did ask about a particular position - doggy style. You saying you don't use your strapon, doggy style?

quote:

You seem to be under the impression that only a 'doggie style' position works. That's not the case.

Huh? Say what? You'd think me all green & naive if I said that I'd imagine your strapon works in probably every position that my own dick does? Except you specifically don't use it doggy style, apparently?

quote:

When you have anal sex with your submissive, do you only do it one way? Have you never had anal sex while facing her or with her on top? How about spooning? Any times standing while your submissive is laying on the back on the bed with legs dangling to the floor?

This'll shock you but I'm 58 yrs old. Make of that (and my relative life experience) what you will....
Then why don't you know these things?

quote:

Power and control isn't any different either, unless you're implying that the only way to have control over someone is physically. I suppose that could be true in that physically overpowering someone, the weakest form of Dominance, is the prevalent aspect of the dynamic.

Priceless - "the weakest form of Dominance" - that's a keeper....

Anything you're not as capable of is "weak", yes? Despite many a popular thread about how subs (m & f) enjoy being physically overpowered by their dom/me?

quote:

When I think of the "weakest form of Dominance", I get images of some arsehole abusing his long battered spouse. And even you'd concede that's NOT what we're talking about, right?OK. It might be interesting to discuss it. Please expand

quote:

There is also the aspect of controlling another based on other factors. In an obedience based dynamic, I say what I want and he asks how he can please Me.

Well, that IS what I alluded to in my first post. Matters of relevant D/s headspace etc....

Focus.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Agent99
I just wonder what the Domme gets out of it as there isn't any feeling in a dildo.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Agent99
but in general, what's the purpose of the strapon for a Domme?

quote:

ORIGINAL: Focus50
Yeah, I've said the same thing about doggy sex - call it the "power position". But when I posed the question in 'Ask a Mistress' (about whether dommes engage in doggy-sex because the male is physically in a position of power) certain dommes just went into a meltdown of denial and disruption.

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

power

quote:

ORIGINAL: NiceButMeanGirl

Power and control. I love that feeling when I grab a handful of his hair as I'm fucking him, I know he's not going anywhere. Of course, it's voluntary, so he wouldn't anyway. And I know there's a lot more to power than hairpulling and fucking, but I enjoy it all the same. Especially when he's breathlessly screaming "Thank you, Ma'am!! Thank you!!"

quote:

ORIGINAL: Focus50
Yeah, I've said the same thing about doggy sex - call it the "power position". But when I posed the question in 'Ask a Mistress' (about whether dommes engage in doggy-sex because the male is physically in a position of power) certain dommes just went into a meltdown of denial and disruption.

This is too funny. There's no one position that's inherently more Dominant or submissive, at least not in my mind. It's all about the head space of the participants and who's really in charge, regardless of positioning. lol Just like I do strap-on in various positions, but I'm still the one in charge.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Focus50
That certain positions (like doggy) do heighten a sense of strength, power and control over the receiver, esp when she's bent over a table or whatever and firmly grasped by her hair/hips,waist/shoulders.
Focus.[/font][/size][/color]

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

I don't have to rely on it. My physical stature doesn't have anything to do with control. Control the mind and heart, the body will follow. The same can not be said for overpowering someone physically.

If all somebody has is being taller and greater physical strength, do you seriously call that Dominance? Does your girl follow you because of this? Because you could physically beat her down if she doesn't obey? I will not state My own opinion. I will ask you yours. What is the quintessential component that makes your girl get on her knees during the next twenty-four hours?

quote:

I'll be happy to discuss it with you when we have a free exchange about our sex lives.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Focus50
Unless of course, you're describing (as "Power and control") a generic sense of having your very own penis? Most men can relate.... [;)]

Me, whose had a dick all his life and tried every position imaginable (as far as I know), can tell you your "too funny" statement is tosh! That certain positions (like doggy) do heighten a sense of strength, power and control over the receiver, esp when she's bent over a table or whatever and firmly grasped by her hair/hips,waist/shoulders. That even though it's always been consesual, fact is it ain't over and she ain't going anywhere 'til I'm done. With or without the addition of bondage, you can't relate?

And this will likely shock you and LP; that we physically bigger/stronger (ie "weak", apparently) male doms can do the D/s headspace thingy ta boot.

Focus.

quote:

ORIGINAL: NiceButMeanGirl

quote:

ORIGINAL: Focus50
Unless of course, you're describing (as "Power and control") a generic sense of having your very own penis? Most men can relate.... [;)]

Me, whose had a dick all his life and tried every position imaginable (as far as I know), can tell you your "too funny" statement is tosh! That certain positions (like doggy) do heighten a sense of strength, power and control over the receiver, esp when she's bent over a table or whatever and firmly grasped by her hair/hips,waist/shoulders. That even though it's always been consesual, fact is it ain't over and she ain't going anywhere 'til I'm done. With or without the addition of bondage, you can't relate?

And this will likely shock you and LP; that we physically bigger/stronger (ie "weak", apparently) male doms can do the D/s headspace thingy ta boot.

Focus.

All that ^^^ just because I said "Too funny?" lol lol

Who ever said having a penis = power and control? I sure didn't, but it sounds like you seem to think it does. I could control my sub before I ever tried strap-on. Strap-on is just another, added, dimension for us that we both enjoy. After all, if we don't enjoy WIITWD, then why are we doing it?

I also know some positions offer more power and control. As a matter of fact, I'm sure that's why you wanted to know "whether dommes engage in doggy-sex because the male is physically in a position of power." It may be a power position, but there's more to control and power than position or physical size. There's that "headspace thingy" again, and I can control him with that, regardless of what position we're fucking in.

I may be wrong and please feel free to tell me if you think so, but I get a feeling that you have some issues with Dominant women. But since this is beginning to sound like a pissing contest, can you top my Rambone? Actually, I don't want or need to know the answer.

NBMG

quote:

ORIGINAL: asiansubmissie
Women have gonads.

quote:

ORIGINAL: MariaB
When you take someone anally when laying on your back and getting them to sit on your cock, its going to go in a lot deeper.

quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

quote:

ORIGINAL: asiansubmissie
Women have gonads.

What, even British women?

quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer
I was wondering if it was even possible.

quote:

ORIGINAL: AAkasha
My desire for dominance comes from a desire to see a man's authentic helplessness and vulnerability.

quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer
You know, I'd never even considered that position before. I was wondering if it was even possible.

quote:

ORIGINAL: NiceButMeanGirl

quote:

ORIGINAL: Focus50
Unless of course, you're describing (as "Power and control") a generic sense of having your very own penis? Most men can relate.... [;)]

Me, whose had a dick all his life and tried every position imaginable (as far as I know), can tell you your "too funny" statement is tosh! That certain positions (like doggy) do heighten a sense of strength, power and control over the receiver, esp when she's bent over a table or whatever and firmly grasped by her hair/hips,waist/shoulders. That even though it's always been consesual, fact is it ain't over and she ain't going anywhere 'til I'm done. With or without the addition of bondage, you can't relate?

And this will likely shock you and LP; that we physically bigger/stronger (ie "weak", apparently) male doms can do the D/s headspace thingy ta boot.

quote:

I also know some positions offer more power and control. As a matter of fact, I'm sure that's why you wanted to know "whether dommes engage in doggy-sex because the male is physically in a position of power." It may be a power position, but there's more to control and power than position or physical size. There's that "headspace thingy" again, and I can control him with that, regardless of what position we're fucking in.

quote:

I may be wrong and please feel free to tell me if you think so, but I get a feeling that you have some issues with Dominant women.

quote:

ORIGINAL: AAkasha

Dominance and submission are heavily influenced by state of mind and impact of fantasy and fetish.

I may fuck a man doggy style with my strap on, and that might be the position that makes "me" feel "most powerful" and in control. But what if this is his biggest fantasy in the world, his favorite position, and all he wants, and all he begs for, and even as I am pounding away, he is not the slightest bit humiliated, he's just in all his glory? How does that impact the headspace of said domina? Sure, I could "feel" dominant, but if my partner isn't feeling helpless, vulnerable, then my dominance is all in my head.

So my answer to Focus is this. My most dominant strap on position is the one that makes my submissive feel the most vulnerable, and if it intersects nicely with my most "comfortable" (ie, natural) positions in my strap on, then it will gel quite nicely. My desire for dominance comes from a desire to see a man's authentic helplessness and vulnerability. Me feeling all "in charge" because I am wearing a cock and assuming a position that is stereotypically dominant will not make me feel more dominant if my partner is barking things like "harder! faster! oh god! YES"! But if his head is pressed into the floor in shame and his fists are clenched tight and I can feel it in his body that he's vulnerable - yes, that's hot.

To be honest, with most men, the most vulnerable they can get with a strap on is when the cock is in their mouth. The actual fucking part, for me, is more about physical pleasure/sensation and the motions, and that often depends on the body type of the man, his flexibility, what our surroundings are (bed/furniture/whatever), how tired I am, how physical I want to be.

I can "get off" practically by the mere roleplayed motion of pressing my hips/crotch into a man's ass doggy style if I have a vibe pressed against my clit and some other stimulation. It's how my body is wired to some extend, and the rest is just gravy.

quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

quote:

ORIGINAL: AAkasha
My desire for dominance comes from a desire to see a man's authentic helplessness and vulnerability.

In my humble opinion, you femdoms should say that much, much more frequently than you do. I have a suspicion that it's one of the hardest things for the average malesub to grasp and, of all things a femdom could say to a malesub, it's the one thing most likely to cut through all the standard misunderstandings between each side.