Do you understand the consequences ?

Do you understand the consequences ? (Full Version)

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Submissive

Message

VioletViolence -> Do you understand the consequences ? (1/9/2013 3:23:22 PM)
I'm wondering if many subs do research into their kinks and figure out if they have any consequences, whether physical or mental. The more I read through many male sub profiles and get messages from them, the more I wonder if they've ever actually thought through the consequences of the type of play they're looking for. I don't browse female sub profiles, but I'm thinking some of them may have a similar problem. I understand that most of these people are really just living in fantasy and will never experience the things they dream about, but for me if I came across a scat video and was turned on by it, I know I'd still be wondering in the back of my head "Would I get sick from that? Whether right away or later from all the bacteria. Hmm, I wonder..." I mean, being curious is one thing, but stating outright that it's something you require in a relationship before you've ever even experienced it seems odd to me.

tazzygirl -> RE: Do you understand the consequences ? (1/9/2013 3:43:59 PM)
On line is full of fantasies... from the spank me kind to the kill me kind... and everything in between. But, you might also be surprised at how many people have actually fulfilled some of their fantasies and are looking to kick them up a notch. A common one among many subs is being used by many - whored out - party favor. All sounds simple, the dominant/top/owner is in charge. Yet, in the back of my mind, I want to ask.... what about diseases? When I do ask, I typically get told... well.. thats what blood tests are for.. duh. And that simply makes me shake my head. You could fuck someone tonight, get blood tests tomorrow, fuck someone else, and the disease you caught from the first one wont have shown up in the blood tests.

FelineFae -> RE: Do you understand the consequences ? (1/9/2013 4:16:16 PM)
i don't think many will confess to having leaped before they looked. i love corsets, have corset trained for fair spans of time, and hope to do so again one day. i had looked into it, and had not found anything that seemed troublesome. i still enjoy finding new material on the subject. Then my endo' flaired up and got me to thinking if it's wise to squish your middle when you have rougue uterine cells building spiderwebs inside that area? i still wear them occasionally, just not as one would in tight-lacing. We live and learn.

TieMeInKnottss -> RE: Do you understand the consequences ? (1/9/2013 5:35:21 PM)
I completely agree and I AM a sub. Honestly, the ones that seem so extreme I figure are not really looking (whether scammers, wannabes, crazies..does not matter). I feel the same way about doms, I wonder if some of these guys appreciate the risk they take (being responsible for someone else ). A Dom friend of mine always told me to not trust any Dom who refused to believe or prepare for something going wrong!

imdmb -> RE: Do you understand the consequences ? (1/9/2013 5:59:44 PM)
from what i understand AIDs can hide for up to eight months, a lot of scary shit out there

DarkSteven -> RE: Do you understand the consequences ? (1/9/2013 7:01:55 PM)
You're overthinking it. They're not even aware that their profile will drive women away - they certainly haven't progressed to the logical consequences if it ever DID happen.

DesFIP -> RE: Do you understand the consequences ? (1/9/2013 7:30:22 PM)
The reality is that those with zero experience who are demanding truly edgy play aren't planning to ever meet. It's all fantasy. Most tops here can tell you of meeting someone who claimed to love pain, and safeworded after the first slap because they didn't realize it would hurt. If anybody really offered them this chance, the majority would back out. Which is why when dommes agree to meet for coffee, they get stood up so often.

theRose4U -> RE: Do you understand the consequences ? (1/9/2013 8:16:54 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: imdmb from what i understand AIDs can hide for up to eight months, a lot of scary shit out there Let's not forget the stories of doms fluid bonded to a sub cheating without protection (because #2 is "the only one") much to the suprise of bed mates 3& 4 all while fluid bonded to sub 1 ETA: as for fantasy discussion, I once had a potential scream at me for ruining his masterbation with talk of reality & danger. Boo hoo hoo bad me[:D]

littlewonder -> RE: Do you understand the consequences ? (1/9/2013 10:08:05 PM)
This is why I've always been glad I never had fetishes. I was always simply looking for a loving relationship with a dominant man who would simply control our lives together. Someone, that I could trust with everything and not have to be worried all the time. Do I get scared sometimes and have thoughts in the back of my mind of some things he likes to do? Yup. But over time when I would voice those concerns to him, he would explain to me how he already learned about all that and he already knew the ins and outs. So over time, I just learned to trust him, even if I do have thoughts in the back of my head. So once again, when I see people with lists of fetishes my mind starts thinking that they're really not looking for anything more than for someone to fulfill that fantasy they have had in their head since they were a child. They have never bothered to really look into it because that would ruin the fantasy then for them.

Lynnxz -> RE: Do you understand the consequences ? (1/9/2013 10:48:50 PM)
It's the Internet. No one is as slutty, or as bad-ass as they portray themselves to be.

seekingreality -> RE: Do you understand the consequences ? (1/9/2013 11:22:33 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: VioletViolence I'm wondering if many subs do research into their kinks and figure out if they have any consequences, whether physical or mental. The more I read through many male sub profiles and get messages from them, the more I wonder if they've ever actually thought through the consequences of the type of play they're looking for. I don't browse female sub profiles, but I'm thinking some of them may have a similar problem. I understand that most of these people are really just living in fantasy and will never experience the things they dream about, but for me if I came across a scat video and was turned on by it, I know I'd still be wondering in the back of my head "Would I get sick from that? Whether right away or later from all the bacteria. Hmm, I wonder..." I mean, being curious is one thing, but stating outright that it's something you require in a relationship before you've ever even experienced it seems odd to me. Personally, I don't have specific activities I require. There are some things I like. But even those things I don't necessarily like with every woman; it's all about the energy between us. And, yes, I agree it's weird to have a "requirement" of something you've never done. Because the reality is you never really know how you'll react to something until you do it. That said, I certainly research the medical and health consequences of any activity before I undertake it.

Alecta -> RE: Do you understand the consequences ? (1/10/2013 12:26:43 AM)
What's it matter? It's unlikely they'll ever get far away from their computers enough to try half of that stuff out anyway. But that's where I see it as the D's responsibility to find out, inform and assess the risk. If a D is willing for their s to take the risk and the s is willing to serve that kind of D then that's consent too.

ForeverGaia -> RE: Do you understand the consequences ? (1/10/2013 4:30:08 AM)
I admit to being a leap before I look kind of girl. Good thing I have a good Master who knows his stuff. Gaia.

DarkSteven -> RE: Do you understand the consequences ? (1/10/2013 5:27:32 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: littlewonder This is why I've always been glad I never had fetishes. I was always simply looking for a loving relationship with a dominant man who would simply control our lives together. Someone, that I could trust with everything and not have to be worried all the time. Do I get scared sometimes and have thoughts in the back of my mind of some things he likes to do? Yup. But over time when I would voice those concerns to him, he would explain to me how he already learned about all that and he already knew the ins and outs. So over time, I just learned to trust him, even if I do have thoughts in the back of my head. littlewonder, that's just such a nice, simple way of describing what most submissive women are looking for. A man, a relationship. Trust. Obedience and submission. Beautiful.

lizi -> RE: Do you understand the consequences ? (1/10/2013 6:04:44 AM)
I think a lot of people don't care much about research. It seems that even starting to think about consequences and possibilities is beyond some when they have deep emotional needs or powerful desires. Working with the public in the medical field, I find myself shocked continually on how lackadaisical attitudes are about personal responsibility and health. Oh...you have diabetes and couldn't bother to care for yourself, and now you're having a leg amputated? Alright then, it's your choice, but had you taken the slightest interest in being proactive this might not have happened and you'd be walking home today instead of in a wheelchair. Oh...you had one leg amputated from uncontrolled diabetes and now you're having the other one amputated for the same reason? I see. Or the AIDS patients screaming at others from their rooms because they're filled with anger and self-loathing at what they've done to themselves. Obviously I"m only talking about the people who got themselves into the situations they find themselves in, not the ones who have had accidents or had wrong done to them by another. It seems that many people are motivated by what they want, and their world begins and ends there. Seems like powerful desires for certain things creates a kind of tunnel vision in people's sexual/emotional lives.

JeffBC -> RE: Do you understand the consequences ? (1/10/2013 7:28:54 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Lynnxz It's the Internet. No one is as slutty, or as bad-ass as they portray themselves to be. ROFL Carol is quite a bit "sluttier" than she portrays herself to be. I know of two guys who are quite a bit more bad-ass than they portray themselves to be. Most everyone I have actually met from CM was pretty much as advertised. "Posting on the internet" and "having integrity" are not mutually exclusive.

TNDommeK -> RE: Do you understand the consequences ? (1/10/2013 10:00:43 AM)
This is a good question, op. I have had people email me and ask for the most dangerous of things, and I'm like really??? There is no way they have thought this through. I'm always the type to think, what can go wrong? I guess in that regard I'm a pessimist. But I would assume that's a good thing for all involved.

LadyPact -> RE: Do you understand the consequences ? (1/10/2013 10:04:07 AM)
Why do you think I'm constantly harping about RACK?

MissAsylum -> RE: Do you understand the consequences ? (1/10/2013 10:08:36 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: TNDommeK This is a good question, op. I have had people email me and ask for the most dangerous of things, and I'm like really??? There is no way they have thought this through. I'm always the type to think, what can go wrong? I guess in that regard I'm a pessimist. But I would assume that's a good thing for all involved. This. Just speaking for myself, it just feels that if somebody throws enough money at me, then they believe that I'll do what they want- be it sexual in nature, or extreme medical procedures. If I had a dollar for every time somebody actually wanted me to take their testicles out...I would never have to work again. I'm 23 and a pro domme, not Doogie Howser.

myotherself -> RE: Do you understand the consequences ? (1/10/2013 10:21:17 AM)
It's not just subs - I've lost count of the number of dom profiles I've seen which outline the most ridiculous scenarios for 'real life'. I think a lot of people get carried away with the porn-induced idea of kink and forget that the kink is there to spice up the vanilla, not replace it.

Page: [1] 2 3 next > >>

Collarchat.com © 2025

Terms of Service

0.046875