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Dominate honestly - 1/9/2013 5:01:31 PM   
Sattva81


Posts: 3
Joined: 11/24/2012
Status: offline 		I am huge in psychology and reading people. I read a few (actually about 10) polls that pretty much say the percentage of ACTUAL dominate individuals (men)...is NOT high. I think that some people are Naturally dominate and majority of people TRY to fit the bill. Either way the REAL question is. If somebody was to present...an experimental "project" which is SAFE, SANE and a CONTROLLED environment to which both parties (the giving party knows what's what they are doing) agree upon the degree of domination...to where people would learn and be satisfied . I wonder if people would be interested in such a project. The administering party would be profession. All comments are welcome.
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Dominate honestly - 1/9/2013 5:02:40 PM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline 		DOMINANT


Dominate is a verb.

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to Sattva81)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Dominate honestly - 1/9/2013 5:06:54 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		Dude, fix that post while you still have time to edit. You sound like an America tourist trying to ask for directions in the middle of Tokyo.


_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to OsideGirl)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Dominate honestly - 1/9/2013 5:48:22 PM   
SimplyMichael


Posts: 7229
Joined: 1/7/2007
Status: offline 		Being dominant is not a binary thing, its more complex even than a simple bell curve because you also have to factor in other people's reaction to that dominance.

Its like saying "are you fast" without asking compared to whom and in what sport, age, or league.

(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Dominate honestly - 1/9/2013 5:48:46 PM   
AllisonWilder


Posts: 296
Joined: 10/8/2012
Status: offline 		Aren't there already safe, sane and controlled environments for people to do these things? I could have sworn they were called play parties though, not projects/experiments. Hmm.

(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Dominate honestly - 1/9/2013 5:59:54 PM   
Missokyst


Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
Status: offline 		umm...
Safe, sane and in a controlled environment? That's what professionals are for. There are plenty around if you look for them.

_____________________________

pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding ~Gibran, Kahlil

“The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for.”
― Bob Marley


(in reply to Sattva81)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Dominate honestly - 1/9/2013 6:07:46 PM   
NiceButMeanGirl


Posts: 2756
Joined: 11/4/2011
From: Bellingham, WA U.S.A.
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Sattva81
the percentage of ACTUAL dominate individuals (men)...is NOT high.

One, dominate is a verb, dominant is a noun. Two, did the polls specify men or did you? Because if that was your idea, it's a mistake to think that only men can be dominant.

Besides, if a person were to be measured on his(or her) degree of dominance, what standard would he(or she) be measured against? Or would it be more like getting graded on the curve against everyone else in the test, rather than being compared to a standard like getting graded on the point system?

NBMG

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I'm now SweetlySadistic1 on CollarSpace. NBMG is an old profile, please see my new one.


(in reply to Sattva81)
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RE: Dominate honestly - 1/9/2013 6:08:32 PM   
theRose4U


Posts: 3403
Joined: 8/22/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

DOMINANT


Dominate is a verb.

This & why would a dominant care if "mannars are mistaken for NOT being submissive"??? Back to the drawing board & try this again in english.

_____________________________

Finding a good sub is like sifting through trail mix. You find a few fruits, a lotta nuts and have to sift to get to the sweet and special ones
drama llama

(in reply to OsideGirl)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Dominate honestly - 1/9/2013 6:30:35 PM   
lizi


Posts: 4673
Joined: 2/1/2009
Status: offline 		Are you a native English speaker? I ask since this OP is very confusing, and in your profile you seem to imply that you are submissive- but I think that is a mistake.


(in reply to Sattva81)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Dominate honestly - 1/9/2013 6:57:34 PM   
DarkSteven


Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Sattva81

I am huge in psychology and reading people.


Cool.

quote:



I read a few (actually about 10) polls that pretty much say the percentage of ACTUAL dominate individuals (men)...is NOT high.



Polls, huh? So this is basically a sampling of opinions.
quote:



I think that some people are Naturally dominate and majority of people TRY to fit the bill.


Oh, boy. Your conception here is that some are born Dom, some fake it, and nobody can grow into it. The idea that Doms are born and not made is controversial. And if a Dom can in fact be grown into, then the difference between growing-into Doms and fakes becomes very blurred.
quote:



Either way the REAL question is. If somebody was to present...an experimental "project" which is SAFE, SANE and a CONTROLLED environment to which both parties (the giving party knows what's what they are doing) agree upon the degree of domination


Stop right there. You're suggesting that there could be a scale of Dominance, from 1 to 10? I cannot fathom quantifying that. How would you do that? Hours spent Topping others? Percent of people in the community who, when polled, say that you're very Dom? How good you look in leather?
quote:



...to where people would learn and be satisfied . I wonder if people would be interested in such a project. The administering party would be profession. All comments are welcome.


I don't agree with the binary of born Dom/fake, and there's no way you could come up with a quantification of Domliness that would pass muster. I think this is dead in the water. If this WAS a feasible experiment, exactly what information would it show when done and explained?

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to Sattva81)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Dominate honestly - 1/9/2013 7:22:45 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		Dominance is relationship specific. Doesn't matter if 9 out of 10 agree that some dude is the most dominant guy around, it still won't change how I feel about him. And without the required chemistry, him proving himself trustworthy, him proving himself a good decision maker, there is no fucking way I would agree to submit. Certainly not for some experiment.

Beyond that, we all know what we're doing and have agreed to it. That's called informed consent and I don't know anyone on these boards unable to give that. So what would your experiment show except that people don't submit to someone who has been assigned to them as a dominant?

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to DarkSteven)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Dominate honestly - 1/9/2013 7:24:46 PM   
JeffBC


Posts: 5799
Joined: 2/12/2012
From: Canada
Status: offline 		Well... the first thing I'd need to ask is "What do you mean by 'dominant'?" Honestly, the fact that you brought up SSC tells me you don't mean what I mean by it.

_____________________________

I'm a lover of "what is", not because I'm a spiritual person, but because it hurts when I argue with reality. -- Bryon Katie
"You're humbly arrogant" -- sunshinemiss
officially a member of the K Crowd

(in reply to Sattva81)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Dominate honestly - 1/9/2013 7:51:12 PM   
tazzygirl


Posts: 37833
Joined: 10/12/2007
Status: offline
quote:

SAFE, SANE and a CONTROLLED


SSC is safe, sane and consensual. Not everyone follows that. Some prefer RACK, is probably closer to what you meant.

Controlled environment? That would be closer to a dungeon or a play party... not one on one. Many do go to those.

There are even professional Dominatrices who do take on new clients. Perhaps you should find one of those.

_____________________________

Telling me to take Midol wont help your butthurt.
RIP, my demon-child 5-16-11
Duchess of Dissent 1
Dont judge me because I sin differently than you.
If you want it sugar coated, dont ask me what i think! It would violate TOS.

(in reply to Sattva81)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Dominate honestly - 1/9/2013 9:10:59 PM   
TAFKAA


Posts: 382
Joined: 1/5/2013
Status: offline 		Dude, I spent a full 20 seconds trying to parse that nonsense and you still sound batshit-crazy.

Consequently, I have no idea what the fuck you're on about.

(in reply to Sattva81)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Dominate honestly - 1/9/2013 9:20:15 PM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline 		well being I like dominant men instead of dominate men, not really interested.


_____________________________

Nothing has changed
Everything has changed

(in reply to Sattva81)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Dominate honestly - 1/10/2013 2:41:32 AM   
AthenaSurrenders


Posts: 3582
Joined: 3/15/2012
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Sattva81

I am huge in psychology and reading people. I read a few (actually about 10) polls that pretty much say the percentage of ACTUAL dominate individuals (men)...is NOT high. I think that some people are Naturally dominate and majority of people TRY to fit the bill. Either way the REAL question is. If somebody was to present...an experimental "project" which is SAFE, SANE and a CONTROLLED environment to which both parties (the giving party knows what's what they are doing) agree upon the degree of domination...to where people would learn and be satisfied . I wonder if people would be interested in such a project. The administering party would be profession. All comments are welcome.


I don't understand. Are you saying we should have professionals teaching people how to be dominant? Because I'm not sure what kind of professional standards we could measure the teachers by, and it's so subjective and personal that there would be no single method that could be taught in any useful way. Though there is certainly some benefit from spending time around other dominants you respect and seeing what qualities they posses that you could emulate and the different styles of running their relationships.

Or are you saying there should be safe, controlled places for people to learn specific topping skills from professionals? Because those already exist, no experimentation needed.

At first I thought you were proposing some kind of scientific experiment to determine accurately how many people are actually dominant. But whatever you're asking, I wouldn't put too much faith in polls, they are only opinions and anyone can say whatever they like. (If the OP doesn't have English as a first language, I wonder if 'poll' could be a mistranslation of 'study' or something similar, which might make more sense)

_____________________________

Being your slave, what should I do but tend
Upon the hours and times of your desire?

(in reply to Sattva81)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Dominate honestly - 1/10/2013 6:31:03 AM   
KnightofMists


Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael

Being dominant is not a binary thing, its more complex even than a simple bell curve because you also have to factor in other people's reaction to that dominance.

Its like saying "are you fast" without asking compared to whom and in what sport, age, or league.




and lets not forget... the tortis did beat the hare! hense the complex nature of d/s dynamics.

To me... both Dominance and Submission are not defined in a universal sense. People that are Dominant or Submissive might have some common traits but not all traits that are found are in all such people. There are so many combinations that it is rather endless. Not to forget other personality/character aspects that are distinct from Dominance or submission.

I have come to understand the commonality of submissive traits that draw me. As well as other personality/character traits. This doesn't mean all other submissive are not submissive just that they don't attact me. Sadly, not all those submissive persons that are attractive to myself will be attracted to me. It is not a black and white world...

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to SimplyMichael)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Dominate honestly - 1/10/2013 7:20:20 AM   
RumpusParable


Posts: 1923
Joined: 7/7/2005
From: NYC now!
Status: offline 		"the percentage of ACTUAL dominate individuals (men)...is NOT high"

First off: Hi! I'm a dominant female!

Second: As others have asked, what scale are you going to use? And applied to what relationships? Do you even realize/recognize that different people show different amounts of dominance in different relationships?

Third: I'll assume you did actually mean "Safe, Sane, and Controlled" and were using it as an intentional play on the acronym... So, I'll ask, do you realize/recognize that not everyone agrees with or has relationships based/described by the SSC acronym?

_____________________________

Relationships come and go, but plastination is forever.

I generally use fast-reply. If directing my post at someone specific I will indicate so.

Minimal summary: Artist, Disabled Veteran, Vegan, Pornographer, and Agender dominant female.

(in reply to KnightofMists)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Dominate honestly - 1/10/2013 7:37:08 AM   
DarkSteven


Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: RumpusParable

Hi! I'm a dominant female!



RumpusParable, keep at it. After more experience in the lifestyle, you too may become a Dominate someday.

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to RumpusParable)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Dominate honestly - 1/10/2013 7:47:49 AM   
RumpusParable


Posts: 1923
Joined: 7/7/2005
From: NYC now!
Status: offline 		I'm trying, I'm trying...

I've been studying hard for the next quiz.

_____________________________

Relationships come and go, but plastination is forever.

I generally use fast-reply. If directing my post at someone specific I will indicate so.

Minimal summary: Artist, Disabled Veteran, Vegan, Pornographer, and Agender dominant female.

(in reply to DarkSteven)
Profile   Post #: 20
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