Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

Consider a hetero sub?


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Mistress >> Consider a hetero sub? Page: [1] 2   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
Consider a hetero sub? - 6/18/2006 9:05:28 PM   
suggababy23


Posts: 73
Joined: 10/16/2005
Status: offline
I was talking with a friend of mine earlier and I was curious if a Domme would consider taking on a hetero female sub to train, knowing that she would have no interest in any form or lesbian or bisexual sex?    
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Consider a hetero sub? - 6/18/2006 9:16:15 PM   
ladylexington


Posts: 117
Joined: 6/7/2005
Status: offline
Of course. Not all service is sexual. If a sub has the ability to grasp power exchange and the willingness to accept it, I would definitely consider her.

_____________________________

If you must gamble your lives sexually, don't play a lone hand too much. -- Mark Twain

(in reply to suggababy23)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Consider a hetero sub? - 6/18/2006 9:17:04 PM   
fergus


Posts: 1110
Joined: 6/22/2005
Status: offline
Well, I can't speak to this experience specifically, but ... I am a hetro (male) sub, and once, a lesbian Domme contacted me and asked if I would ever consider a service position with a lesbian Domme, knowing that there would be no sex.  For this and other reasons (like distance, compatability, etc) I politely declined.  We still write on occasion, and I consider her to be "good people" :)

I have also heard about hetro sub males, and Bi Dommes who find the notion of foced bi in their hetro make subs to be exciting.  Come to think of it, a Domme once asked me if I would do forced bi.  I told her no, and she, being a very respectful person totally understood that :)  She is another friend that I still talk to now and again.

fergus

(in reply to suggababy23)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Consider a hetero sub? - 6/18/2006 9:21:30 PM   
Misstoyou


Posts: 1149
Joined: 9/4/2004
Status: offline
For me, personally, it's no, though mostly I've declined lesbian or bi women. I process my lifestyle interests sexually, and since I'm straight, I don't have any visceral drive to dominate a woman.

_____________________________

~ Miss Marie

a.k.a. "mean Lady"


(in reply to suggababy23)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Consider a hetero sub? - 6/19/2006 12:38:39 AM   
suggababy23


Posts: 73
Joined: 10/16/2005
Status: offline
This isn't something I myself have considered but it is something that a friend of mine has suggested as a possibility.  I wasn't sure if most Dom/mes related domination to sex or if they saw it as unrelated. 

(in reply to Misstoyou)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Consider a hetero sub? - 6/19/2006 12:54:50 AM   
MsKatHouston


Posts: 1909
Joined: 6/7/2006
From: Houston, TX
Status: offline
absolutely I would

_____________________________

-Kat

~If you can't be a good example, you'll just have to serve as a horrible warning~

(in reply to suggababy23)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Consider a hetero sub? - 6/19/2006 2:14:36 AM   
Master96


Posts: 593
Joined: 2/13/2006
Status: offline
Dear suggababy23,

May I ask you? Why would you seek a Domme to train while you are hetero?

In addition, I think lesbian relationship doesn't include sex only... as for other relationships as well. Could you be bi? Attracted to men sexually and females emotionally?

Maybe what I just wrote was stupid... anyway, good luck.

Master,

(in reply to MsKatHouston)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Consider a hetero sub? - 6/19/2006 3:46:22 AM   
MistressTheaZ


Posts: 155
Joined: 7/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ladylexington

Of course. Not all service is sexual. If a sub has the ability to grasp power exchange and the willingness to accept it, I would definitely consider her.


Agreed, also to add: just because one takes on a sub for training does not mean it will necessarily evolve into a long-term D/s relationship. I have taken male and female subs in the past whom I wasn't attracted to or intended to have sexual contact with. Certainly, just because one is bisexual does not mean that you're attracted to ALL women, *laugh*, and it may likely be I don't have an interest in her that way anyhow. If it would be something she'd fret over, I'd wonder why she sought out service with an admittedly bisexual or lesbian Domme, honestly. 

Preferances are individual, of course - there are many who do not make sexuality, (oral or penetrative sex), part of their respective dynamic at all, regardless of sexual identity. There are others who involve elements and still others for whom this must be a component. That said, I personally wouldn't look for a long-term pet with whom I didn't share a mutual attraction leading to more later on.

~Thea

(in reply to ladylexington)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Consider a hetero sub? - 6/19/2006 5:38:24 AM   
MHOO314


Posts: 3628
Joined: 9/26/2004
Status: offline
I have and I do now mentor a female submissive, but it is conceptual philosophical work only that she then translates in to her relationship ( with her Master's full permission by the way...)---I could not take one "in" as I find the dynamic of female submissives and male submissives very very different in actual practice.

_____________________________

SLUTS: Southern Ladies Under Tremendous Stress...

Mistress Hathor


(in reply to suggababy23)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Consider a hetero sub? - 6/19/2006 6:51:01 AM   
Proprietrix


Posts: 756
Joined: 7/15/2005
From: Ohio/West Virginia
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: suggababy23
I was talking with a friend of mine earlier and I was curious if a Domme would consider taking on a hetero female sub to train, knowing that she would have no interest in any form or lesbian or bisexual sex? 



Absolutely! If we had the right personality match, we'd probably hit it off splendidly. She's not looking for sex. Neither am I.
The only part I'd be leary of would be the "to train" part.
Train for what? For whom?
If she's going to be in my collar, I'll train her in my ways, with my rules.
And then, I'd want her to be mine.
I wouldn't want to put a lot of time and effort into training her just to give her away.
I'm a bit more selfish and greedy than that.

_____________________________

IMO, IMHO, YMMV, AFAIK, to me, I see it as, from my perspective, it's been my experience, I only speak for myself, (and all other disclaimers here).

(in reply to suggababy23)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Consider a hetero sub? - 6/19/2006 7:55:06 AM   
suggababy23


Posts: 73
Joined: 10/16/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Master96

Dear suggababy23,

May I ask you? Why would you seek a Domme to train while you are hetero?

In addition, I think lesbian relationship doesn't include sex only... as for other relationships as well. Could you be bi? Attracted to men sexually and females emotionally?

Maybe what I just wrote was stupid... anyway, good luck.

Master,


Thats a good question.  And actually the reason is because I am finding an increasing sense of frustration as I have been looking for men to train me.  I am fairly new in this lifestyle and I am pretty much open to learning as much and all that I can. However, with the Dom's I have met, it has started out with the promise of training and ended up in every direction but.  So I have been thinking that perhaps if I met a Domme who had no interest in me sexually, we could stay focused on my training and not some sort of romantic relationship.  And no, I am not bi sexual. 

(in reply to Master96)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Consider a hetero sub? - 6/19/2006 9:10:08 AM   
thetammyjo


Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: suggababy23

I was talking with a friend of mine earlier and I was curious if a Domme would consider taking on a hetero female sub to train, knowing that she would have no interest in any form or lesbian or bisexual sex?


That wouldn't bother me because while I have trained some women and been served by some women, none of that has been sexual.

I would to insist though that anyone coming into my house be at least poly friendly because we are poly and would not tolerate some monogamous person coming in and trying to change us or preach to us.

_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to suggababy23)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Consider a hetero sub? - 6/19/2006 11:11:21 AM   
Master96


Posts: 593
Joined: 2/13/2006
Status: offline
Dear suggababy23,

I’m sorry to hear about your frustration. And you have the right to seek knowledge and training from anywhere you can, and I welcome you and encourage you as you are "new in this lifestyle"... you have all my support.

Be patient… you’ll meet the right Master, it just takes time.

Master,

(in reply to thetammyjo)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Consider a hetero sub? - 6/19/2006 11:29:15 AM   
LadiesBladewing


Posts: 944
Joined: 8/31/2005
Status: offline
Since sex is not really a part of service life here, we would, if she was suited in other areas. We're basically gender/pref irrelevant here, except in assisting someone to accept him or herself as s/he is, including any gender or preference issues.

ZWD

_____________________________


"Should have", "could have", "would have" and "can't" may be the most dangerous phrases in the English language.

Bladewing Enclave

(in reply to suggababy23)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Consider a hetero sub? - 6/19/2006 11:40:09 AM   
sweetnsensual


Posts: 61
Joined: 9/9/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Master96

Dear suggababy23,

In addition, I think lesbian relationship doesn't include sex only... as for other relationships as well. Could you be bi? Attracted to men sexually and females emotionally?

Master,


i think that's absolutely wonderful.  the idea that a person can be bisexual in the sense they're attracted to men sexually and females emotionally.  a friend of mine has this exact problem.  she wants a man sexually but often finds that bonding with them emotionally is difficult--personally, i think she just picks the wrong guys but on with it.  but, she also is attracted to women.  she likes a woman's shape, her softness and the emotional side of a relationship but, as of now, cannot picture herself actually having sex with a woman.  neither of us think there's something wrong with it--i want to get that across.  she just can't picture it right now.  she learned of her attraction to women somewhat recently and is still figuring things out.

i just wanted to compliment Master96 for introducing the idea to the conversation.  Thank You very much.

(in reply to LadiesBladewing)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Consider a hetero sub? - 6/19/2006 12:56:12 PM   
GoddessDustyGold


Posts: 2822
Joined: 4/11/2004
From: Arizona
Status: offline
I would definitely consider a hetero femme sub.  The power exchange does not need to be, annd mostly is not, about sexual things.  Like Proprietrix, I am not sure how I would feel about grooming a girl for a potential Male Dom, but it is not out of the realm of possibility.  And My profile invites petitions from both male and female, because My dynamic is not sexually oriented. 

_____________________________

Dusty
They that give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety
B Franklin
Don't blame Me ~ I didn't vote for either of them
The Hidden Kingdom


(in reply to suggababy23)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Consider a hetero sub? - 6/20/2006 5:35:22 AM   
suggababy23


Posts: 73
Joined: 10/16/2005
Status: offline
Thank you for everyone's responses :)

(in reply to GoddessDustyGold)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Consider a hetero sub? - 6/20/2006 8:30:33 AM   
MasterFireMaam


Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline
My slave girl anne is het. she's married and also has a sexual Top (the marriage is open). Any combination of sexual orientations that you want to think of exist as Ds or Ms relationships.

Master Fire


_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
-----
Ms Relationship Books
-----
BDSM How-To Books

(in reply to suggababy23)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Consider a hetero sub? - 6/20/2006 9:15:41 AM   
LadyMorgynn


Posts: 800
Joined: 11/25/2005
From: N. Carolina
Status: offline
I have no problem with that.  My *preference* is for a lesbian, but that's because I also intend to have a male slave, and the household would be easier to manage without the possibility of sexual tension arising between the 2 slaves.  That's a preference, however, not a requirement, and if I find the right female to be My slave, it won't matter to me if she is straight, bi, lesbian or asexual.  Just so long as she is My slave.

quote:

ORIGINAL: suggababy23

I was talking with a friend of mine earlier and I was curious if a Domme would consider taking on a hetero female sub to train, knowing that she would have no interest in any form or lesbian or bisexual sex?    


_____________________________

---
Lady Morgynn
www.farhorizons.net/LadyMorgynn

(in reply to suggababy23)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Consider a hetero sub? - 6/20/2006 9:17:30 AM   
LadyMorgynn


Posts: 800
Joined: 11/25/2005
From: N. Carolina
Status: offline
Amen, sistah!  LOL.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Proprietrix
Absolutely! If we had the right personality match, we'd probably hit it off splendidly. She's not looking for sex. Neither am I.
The only part I'd be leary of would be the "to train" part.
Train for what? For whom?
If she's going to be in my collar, I'll train her in my ways, with my rules.
And then, I'd want her to be mine.
I wouldn't want to put a lot of time and effort into training her just to give her away.
I'm a bit more selfish and greedy than that.


_____________________________

---
Lady Morgynn
www.farhorizons.net/LadyMorgynn

(in reply to Proprietrix)
Profile   Post #: 20
Page:   [1] 2   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Mistress >> Consider a hetero sub? Page: [1] 2   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.094