Why is it so common to have the spankee count out the number of strokes? (Full Version)

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion



Message


Pyramus -> Why is it so common to have the spankee count out the number of strokes? (1/11/2013 9:17:51 PM)

I've noticed in the spanking/caning genre that I tend to enjoy watching, the spankees very often are told to count out the strokes.

I wonder why?

What's more exiting to me are the feminine yelps and the developing welts, along with the whack of the whip and the squirm of the hips.

So, why the need to count out the strokes?

Is it a safeword or sorts? Protocol?




poise -> RE: Why is it so common to have the spankee count out the number of strokes? (1/11/2013 9:37:35 PM)

I think it's used as a means to keep them more focused.
Some can count and then yelp, so it's still a win win for you!




Nakhla -> RE: Why is it so common to have the spankee count out the number of strokes? (1/11/2013 9:49:19 PM)


There are a lot of dyscalculic dominants.

For findommes, it's for tax purposes.




Spiritedsub2 -> RE: Why is it so common to have the spankee count out the number of strokes? (1/11/2013 9:52:34 PM)

I don't know the reason firsthand, but have read that the focus required for counting prevents the spankee from entering subspace, so that the caning hurts more than pleases. Undoubtedly someone will know whether this is true and will chime in soon.




Muttling -> RE: Why is it so common to have the spankee count out the number of strokes? (1/11/2013 10:01:14 PM)

I'm submissive by nature, but do Top from time to time. I only use the counting when I'm getting intense and pushing the bottom. What they say and how they say it gives me a lot of insight into how long to wait for the next one as well as how hard to make it.




Extravagasm -> RE: Why is it so common to have the spankee count out the number of strokes? (1/11/2013 10:45:35 PM)

An interesting subject. Like the OP, I too dislike counting. In real life, people do it both ways. Counting and non-counting, cuz different strokes for different folks. For good reasons the above posters have said.

But you referenced BDSM porn. I believe that counting (or monotonous thank-yous) are evolving to be like the obligatory cum shot in vanilla porn. And for similar reasons.

Both porn producers must substitute alternative concepts for the missing sensuality of their wooden actors (no pun). Since they must substitute something, the porn genres have come up with low-emotion substitutions that are mildly dramatic and give beginning and end to the sequences.

Also note, the great classics of BDSM (eg Venus in Furs, Story of O, Marquis deSade, The Image, Many Kisses, Carrie's Story, etc) tend to be mostly devoid of counting.




littlewonder -> RE: Why is it so common to have the spankee count out the number of strokes? (1/11/2013 10:47:36 PM)

Master does it for discipline reasons. When he has me count them it's because he feels I have lost touch, I've taken him for granted and he doesn't want me in subspace. He wants me in the now and present. It's also a way to teach me to be able to focus more on taking the pain since it's something he is working on with me since it's been slow going and not something easy for me.

And then there are times he does it because he's a sadistic bastard and he knows eventually I will fuck it up and he'll make me start all over again which of course, gets him even harder. [:-]




EsotericLady -> RE: Why is it so common to have the spankee count out the number of strokes? (1/11/2013 10:57:41 PM)

This post is soooooo funny! The very last line is priceless... and just when I needed a smile!

(Thank you)
quote:

ORIGINAL: Nakhla


There are a lot of dyscalculic dominants.

For findommes, it's for tax purposes.





AthenaSurrenders -> RE: Why is it so common to have the spankee count out the number of strokes? (1/12/2013 2:18:17 AM)

fast reply

If it appears a lot in porn, my guess would be that someone has figured out it gets a lot of people hard, therefore they keep including it to appeal to those people.

As for why people do it in play, I can think of lots of reasons.

For some, it might be to help the sub get through the pain by giving them something to focus on. Especially if there is a set number to be doled out, so the sub knows how much more is to come.
For others, the opposite. If the sub likes to zone out or has his/her own way of processing the pain, being given a task like counting or asking for more can disrupt this. That might work well for a sadist top, or for a punishment.
For some, like LW mentioned, it gives an 'excuse' to start over or ramp up the intensity which can be a delicious or dreadful game.
Some like the formality and protocol of it. And for those who enjoy roleplaying, counting out your six of the best was a pretty common part of an old-fashioned school caning.

We don't do this. I'm a wimp who's usually screaming before stroke number 4, and he generally doesn't like there to be any sort of predictable pattern I can relax into, so it wouldn't work for us. On the other hand, if he wanted me to stay in control this might be a technique he could use to help me work on it.




Focus50 -> RE: Why is it so common to have the spankee count out the number of strokes? (1/12/2013 3:49:32 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Pyramus

I've noticed in the spanking/caning genre that I tend to enjoy watching, the spankees very often are told to count out the strokes.

I wonder why?

What's more exiting to me are the feminine yelps and the developing welts, along with the whack of the whip and the squirm of the hips.

So, why the need to count out the strokes?

Is it a safeword or sorts? Protocol?


As others have said, to keep her focused rather than sliding into sub-space. Trouble is I'm usually the one who ultimately loses focus through constantly cajoling her to count in a comprehendable voice (beyond frikkin 3, dammit...!).

A second possible reason is that kink porn is often made by clueless vanillas with no concept of sub-space. Instead, they draw on cliche's and stereotypes about how any spankee must be in all kinds of torturous pain. So for effect, may as well have 'em count it out, too.

Me, I've given up fighting early-onset sub-space and just let her go where she goes, which allows me to get into my zone.

Focus.




nephandi -> RE: Why is it so common to have the spankee count out the number of strokes? (1/12/2013 4:16:23 AM)

Greetings

I enjoy to be told to count the strokes and often add a thank you after each one. Partly it have to do with focus, but also with discipline, in stead of yelping and doing anything else you have to count and then thank the Dom for hitting you. For me it is submission rather than pain that tuns me on, the accepting pain as a part of submission and counting just add to that feeling of submission.

I wish you well




ResidentSadist -> RE: Why is it so common to have the spankee count out the number of strokes? (1/12/2013 7:02:03 AM)

It is from corporal punishment which consists of a predetermined number of strokes or lashes. You are given X number of lashes/strokes and someone counts them off. The whip master, his assistant or the authority figure that prescribed the punishment (if present) normally counts off the strokes. Making the person being punished count off their own punishment only adds to the humiliation, which applied to BDSM is an added excitement for most.


It's origins in BDSM had nothing to do with Zen like focus or anything else. Like rank and uniforms, it was a military protocol adopted by the leathermen. That is where the counting came from.




Lucifyre -> RE: Why is it so common to have the spankee count out the number of strokes? (1/12/2013 7:09:40 AM)

It's line #42 in the Dirty Dom handbook.

42. Make your sub count the strikes so whatever you're smacking them with hurts more and the numbers will eventually sound like cuss words.

Lucifyre




LadyPact -> RE: Why is it so common to have the spankee count out the number of strokes? (1/12/2013 7:16:37 AM)

OK. Show Me what I'm missing here. Qualified to wield a whip but perplexed regarding the scenario.




thracia -> RE: Why is it so common to have the spankee count out the number of strokes? (1/12/2013 7:54:57 AM)

It makes no difference to me whether I count or not. It still hurts the same!




JeffBC -> RE: Why is it so common to have the spankee count out the number of strokes? (1/12/2013 9:14:59 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Nakhla
For findommes, it's for tax purposes.

Oh dear lord I think I love you.




cordeliasub -> RE: Why is it so common to have the spankee count out the number of strokes? (1/12/2013 10:43:43 AM)

For me, I was sometimes required to count in order to keep focus. Also, when the spanking was for correction/punishment purposes, not only was it for focus but also to help me know where we were in the spanking process. For example, if I really thought I was at the end of my rope, and we were on 10 out of 12, it helped me not to completely unravel, so to speak.




TNDommeK -> RE: Why is it so common to have the spankee count out the number of strokes? (1/12/2013 11:04:23 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: JeffBC

quote:

ORIGINAL: Nakhla
For findommes, it's for tax purposes.

Oh dear lord I think I love you.



Because each stroke is deductible....somehow. *crunches numbers*




ItzKat -> RE: Why is it so common to have the spankee count out the number of strokes? (1/12/2013 11:57:13 AM)

counting each stroke works for some, not for other. In my case, I only have to count when I am being punished. It does keep me focused on numbers (hate those) and not allow me to slip into the adrenalin ride.

I agree with Extravagasm, it appears so often in commercial SM porn because they are going down the check list... just like cumshots.




ItzKat -> RE: Why is it so common to have the spankee count out the number of strokes? (1/12/2013 11:59:55 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Nakhla


There are a lot of dyscalculic dominants.

For findommes, it's for tax purposes.


I hate numbers, but I LOVE words. Excellent post! I am so using this.




Page: [1] 2 3 4   next >   >>

Valid CSS!




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy
0.03125