What is the sexual nature of the allure of cross dressing for a guy?

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All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> What is the sexual nature of the allure of cross dressing for a guy?

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What is the sexual nature of the allure of cross dressi... - 1/12/2013 12:18:32 PM

Agent99

Posts: 38
Joined: 4/21/2007
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I dress in pants and a shirt, day in and day out, day after day after day.
The only thing I change is the type, whether it be business or casual.
But, I don't try to show off any particular parts of my body by my dress.

Women clearly dress differently than men (for the most part).

Men don't wear short skirts that are designed to show off their legs.
Men don't (usually) wear push-up bras & V-necked tops to promote their sex organs for all the world to see, say, their DD penis-to-ball cleavage lines.
Men don't (often) wear see-through blouses, or uncomfortable shoes just to show
off their calf lines (although some stuff heels for height reasons).

Clearly, men dress differently than women and for different results.

Hence my question.
Cross dressers cross the boundary.
They're guys on the inside and girls on the outside.

Yet, since they're guys underneath those revealing clothes, how do they gain the benefit that girls gain from puruposefully showing off their sexual things?

I'm confused because the wrong equipment will be showing, so I ask:
What is the underlying sexual nature of the allure of cross dressing for a guy?

Post #: 1

RE: What is the sexual nature of the allure of cross dr... - 1/12/2013 12:34:30 PM

crossboi

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Joined: 1/8/2013
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Cross the barrier just once You'll see and feel the difference instantly!

I dress as a woman mainly because I get no attention whatsoever if/when I dress as a man. Nobody cares about me dressed as a man, yet lots of people write to me, the same person, but dressed as a woman.

Dressed as a women, people DO give me more attention. They spend time and energy on me. They talk to me more. The only difference is my clothes.

I enjoy the attention they give me. I crave it in fact. Sure, I tried, as a man, to get the same level of attention, and, well, it's just not there. It never will be. It is so easy to get the attention I crave simply dressed as a women, and it's so very difficult to get any attention at all simply dressed as a man. The difference in clothing is nothing but the difference in people's reaction is enormous!

As a man, I smile at the grocery store baggers and they don't even see me. I smile at a passerby, and they don't even notice me. Yet, if I dress as I am wont to do and buy groceries, the whole store is buzzing about me! The passerbys on the street loop back for a second and third look, and I smile approvingly at them as they do, and show them a little skin for their efforts. It's soooo easy being dressed as a girl. It's not at all easy being dressed as a man. I should have been born a lady. Alas.

Life would be so easy if I could dress as a girl all the time. Not having to think. Not having to fix my car. Not having to carry my groceries to the trunk. Guys left and right just thinking of ways to get my attention, to impress me. Getting offers in the middle of the street. Free breakfasts, lunches, and dinners. Offers to relocate, all expenses paid. All this, simply by being a girl. None of which would I get dressed as a man. I could even be a findomme, were I so inclined.

That's what the allure is, to me anyway.

(in reply to Agent99)

Post #: 2

RE: What is the sexual nature of the allure of cross dr... - 1/12/2013 12:41:15 PM

SylvereApLeanan

Posts: 8275
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From: Hell
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Agent99

Men don't wear short skirts that are designed to show off their legs.
Men don't (usually) wear...V-necked tops to promote their sex organs for all the world to see,
Men don't (often) wear see-through blouses, or uncomfortable shoes just to show
off their calf lines (although some stuff heels for height reasons).

Clearly, you have never been to a Goth club. Or a rave.

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(in reply to Agent99)

Post #: 3

RE: What is the sexual nature of the allure of cross dr... - 1/12/2013 12:46:03 PM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
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From: Apple County NY
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Crossboi, you could be a findomme anyway, looking like you do. And I'm shocked that you can wear those heels, even when young I couldn't have handled them.

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Post #: 4

RE: What is the sexual nature of the allure of cross dr... - 1/12/2013 12:48:32 PM

TheLilSquaw

Posts: 2340
Joined: 10/24/2012
From: Middle River, MD
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OP,
I know many CDs and many look sexy as hell fem.

That being said, who says that CDs cross a boundary?
What boundary are YOU talking about?

The benefit that CDs gain from dressing fem, varies from person to person.
The CDs I know gain a sense of empowerment, self and sexuality when they dress fem.
What do naturally born women gain from dressing feminine and sexy?
I would venture to say the same things.

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(in reply to SylvereApLeanan)

Post #: 5

RE: What is the sexual nature of the allure of cross dr... - 1/12/2013 1:09:28 PM

dollenburg

Posts: 63
Joined: 10/27/2007
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I don't like it. It comes across as fake.

(in reply to TheLilSquaw)

Post #: 6

RE: What is the sexual nature of the allure of cross dr... - 1/12/2013 1:21:33 PM

TheLilSquaw

Posts: 2340
Joined: 10/24/2012
From: Middle River, MD
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quote:

ORIGINAL: dollenburg

I don't like it. It comes across as fake.

Naturally born women get botox, boob job, ass jobs, plastic surgery, hair extensions, ect.
So how is that any different than a CD dressing fem?

ETA: To ME the difference is many women who get those things done deny it.
The CDs I know don't deny that they are men in women's clothing.

< Message edited by TheLilSquaw -- 1/12/2013 1:22:45 PM >

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Post #: 7

RE: What is the sexual nature of the allure of cross dr... - 1/12/2013 2:36:23 PM

OsideGirl

Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Agent99

Men don't wear short skirts that are designed to show off their legs.

I don't wear short skirts. I generally wear skirts that are 2-3 inches above the knee.

quote:

Men don't (usually) wear push-up bras

I don't wear push up bras. I'm a double D, I don't need something to make them look bigger.

quote:

V-necked tops to promote their sex organs for all the world to see

You can have a V neck top that doesn't show cleavage. I generally don't show much cleavage. I long a go got tired of guys treating me like a pair of tits that talks.

quote:

Men don't (often) wear see-through blouses

I don't wear see through blouses, either.

quote:

or uncomfortable shoes just to show

I cop to wearing uncomfortable shoes, but when I do, it because of how they make me feel, not to impress you.

quote:

Clearly, men dress differently than women and for different results.

Clearly, some men have some really unrealistic views of women really wear.

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Post #: 8

RE: What is the sexual nature of the allure of cross dr... - 1/12/2013 5:09:58 PM

StrictlyADomina

Posts: 103
Joined: 7/11/2011
Status: offline

quote:

Life would be so easy if I could dress as a girl all the time. Not having to think. Not having to fix my car. Not having to carry my groceries to the trunk. Guys left and right just thinking of ways to get my attention, to impress me. Getting offers in the middle of the street. Free breakfasts, lunches, and dinners. Offers to relocate, all expenses paid. All this, simply by being a girl. None of which would I get dressed as a man.

quote:

Really! I' m female and don't get that. Well, unless you count the Brookshire bag boys who take my groceries out to the car. Bless your heart crossboi, I never realized thinking was so hard. I guess it just comes easier for some.

But we may have gotten a little off point. I think the question was what do cross dressers get out of cross dressing. So, what's the allure boys?

(in reply to OsideGirl)

Post #: 9

RE: What is the sexual nature of the allure of cross dr... - 1/12/2013 6:20:06 PM

xssve

Posts: 3589
Joined: 10/10/2009
Status: offline

Why, it makes me feel pretty!

You'd have to live here to get the joke, all the chicks around here pretty much wear jeans, t-shirt, Ball cap - I don't actually cross dress, but I do try to get out on Sunday since that's the only day you'll see women in dresses around here.

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Post #: 10

RE: What is the sexual nature of the allure of cross dr... - 1/12/2013 6:39:16 PM

kalikshama

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Post #: 11

RE: What is the sexual nature of the allure of cross dr... - 1/13/2013 8:25:59 AM

OsideGirl

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From: United States
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quote:

ORIGINAL: crossboi

Life would be so easy if I could dress as a girl all the time. Not having to think.

Really? So basically you think women are vapid, thoughtless little bimbos. Nice to know.

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Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

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Post #: 12

RE: What is the sexual nature of the allure of cross dr... - 1/13/2013 9:18:07 AM

littlewonder

Posts: 15659
Status: offline

quote:

Life would be so easy if I could dress as a girl all the time. Not having to think. Not having to fix my car. Not having to carry my groceries to the trunk. Guys left and right just thinking of ways to get my attention, to impress me. Getting offers in the middle of the street. Free breakfasts, lunches, and dinners. Offers to relocate, all expenses paid. All this, simply by being a girl. None of which would I get dressed as a man.

Seriously? Really? You think women don't think? Damn, I knew someone forgot to tell me that I don't belong in college and have had well paying jobs all my life at jobs where I had to think a lot. I don't have a car, but I still don't have people who help me when I blow a tire on my bike or something breaks on it. I end up having to walk it home with no help from anyone. I carry groceries home all the time....me, myself, walking. No help from anyone. All the other stuff you mentioned? Those were and are extremely rare.

So basically the only reason you dress like a woman is for attention. Why not just try being a man and being you? Be confident in who you are and stop pretending to be someone else. I mean, it seems so very weird to me that a guy would dress as a woman for the simple reason of wanting attention. Most men I know who dress as women do it for one of two reasons....they don't see themselves as men and so until they can afford to get the change, they dress as a female. The other reason is that they simply like the way the clothing feels against their skin. Oh and one other reason....for money, their job. Their job is to dress as a woman usually in a club but any other time they dress as the man they are.

So your reason just seems....fraudulent to me.

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Post #: 13

RE: What is the sexual nature of the allure of cross dr... - 1/13/2013 9:40:30 AM

DarkSteven

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Joined: 5/2/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: crossboi
Offers to relocate, all expenses paid. All this, simply by being a girl. None of which would I get dressed as a man.

I have had five offers to relocate, all expenses paid. All of them from people living in Colorado, to have me relocate away at least 1500 miles...

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Post #: 14

RE: What is the sexual nature of the allure of cross dr... - 1/13/2013 2:42:23 PM

subinsilicon

Posts: 108
Joined: 1/7/2013
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven
I have had five offers to relocate, all expenses paid.

I doubt most guys get as many.
And...
If you were a woman, you would probably have had 500.

(in reply to DarkSteven)

Post #: 15

RE: What is the sexual nature of the allure of cross dr... - 1/13/2013 2:53:46 PM

crossboi

Posts: 36
Joined: 1/8/2013
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder
the only reason you dress like a woman is for attention.
So your reason just seems....fraudulent to me.
Why not just try being a man and being you?

I do it for the attention.
You do too.

Let's look at this logically, if we can.

For any woman who wears them, what is the reason for wearing red heels? You might say "for height", and I'd grant you that, but only barely.
Then, I'd ask, for any woman who wears a short skirt (you know who you are), do you get more attention from men when you wear it than if you wore jeans? You'd probably say "you get the same attention because you're the same person and men are looking at you as a person", and, again, I'd grant you that, but only barely.
Then, I'd ask, for those who have gone out for the evening in a low slung revealing gown, did a few people mention how good you looked? You might say "they only care about what I say, not what I look like", and I'd one more time grant you that, but only barely.

If you only knew how both men and women treat me differently when I'm dressed as a girl versus when I'm dressed as a man, you'd understand better how I feel.

(in reply to littlewonder)

Post #: 16

RE: What is the sexual nature of the allure of cross dr... - 1/13/2013 3:00:57 PM

littlewonder

Posts: 15659
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I do?? I do it for me.

Let's see...at my former job every single person in the office is female. I still wore heels and nice business suits. Yes, I worked with male attorneys but there was a counter between them and me. They couldn't even SEE my feet and I wore a business jacket. Any kind of cleavage showing was absolutely prohibited!

When I go out, I never dress up. I wear jeans and throw a tshirt on because most days all I'm doing is running errands. I don't really care what I look like to be honest. I DO dress up for Master but that's because well....he's Master. I do what makes him happy.

When I was single, I never dressed up for men. I wore what I felt comfortable in and what I felt was sexy for me. I rarely showed cleavage since I was already big boobed enough. I had enough problems as it was getting men to look at my face and not my chest. I downplayed my wardrobe all the time.

Ask anyone who knows me, ask Master. He'll tell you how much I absolutely HATEHATEHATE attention. I do everything in my power to avoid it at all costs.

Just because YOU like attention being dressed as a woman does not mean all women dress for attention.

But hey, whatever works for you I guess.

ETA: Oh and I don't think it's being dressed as a girl that's getting you attention, it's your eeerr.....body language. Yeah....body language. <points to his avatar>

ETAA: And Master impressed me with HIS clothing when we met. He wore a suit and was hot as hell and walked with an air of confidence. Maybe try dressing up and getting some confidence in yourself. It works wonders.

< Message edited by littlewonder -- 1/13/2013 3:06:13 PM >

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RE: What is the sexual nature of the allure of cross dr... - 1/13/2013 3:11:01 PM

crossboi

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Joined: 1/8/2013
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quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder
Maybe try dressing up and getting some confidence in yourself. It works wonders.

The only time I _have_ confidence, is when I'm dressed as a lady.

(in reply to littlewonder)

Post #: 18

RE: What is the sexual nature of the allure of cross dr... - 1/13/2013 3:12:24 PM

littlewonder

Posts: 15659
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nevermind

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RE: What is the sexual nature of the allure of cross dr... - 1/13/2013 3:13:46 PM

MistressJinxBBW

Posts: 47
Joined: 1/8/2013
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Sometimes cross dressing is a psychological thing for e.g I had a slave whose sister made him wear her panties and it has scarred him in such away that the brain has processed this feeling and the subconscious then filed it as a form of punishment. He therefore punished himself/humiliated himself daily in this way much like a masochist who inflicts self harm.Just my opinion in some cases I have dealt with in my kinks and profession as a hypnotist.

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Post #: 20

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