IF they were kinky, what would they be? (Full Version)

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LdyViolet -> IF they were kinky, what would they be? (1/26/2013 10:18:48 AM)

The thread about how do you find kinky people in a vanilla world got me thinking about this.. Since I have discovered my kinky side and been learning all I can about D/s and bdsm, I find myself looking at vanilla friends and family and trying to figure out if they would be top, bottom, or switch. For example, my parents.. even though they had a very traditional marriage with my mom being the home maker and my dad the bread winner, I am sure my mom would have been the top and my dad the bottom. My mom was never demanding or overbearing but she was very much in charge, she was just beautifully subtle about it. My dad lived to make her happy, anything she wanted that was in his ability to give her, she would have.

So, does anyone else do this?



LafayetteLady -> RE: IF they were kinky, what would they be? (1/26/2013 10:22:52 AM)

Honestly, no. It is a little creepy to me to think of how my parents might have been kinky.



LdyViolet -> RE: IF they were kinky, what would they be? (1/26/2013 10:57:01 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: LafayetteLady

Honestly, no. It is a little creepy to me to think of how my parents might have been kinky.



I never even thought of it in that context, more of a general Dominant or submissive thing. I have no interest in other people's sex lives, be it vanilla or kinky.. especially my parents! .



kalikshama -> RE: IF they were kinky, what would they be? (1/26/2013 11:28:05 AM)

My parents had sex three times and it was strictly procreational.



NiceButMeanGirl -> RE: IF they were kinky, what would they be? (1/26/2013 11:46:13 AM)

Okay, I'll play. lol

My father would have been a sadistic dominant, totally sadistic. My mother, I'm not sure, but maybe a switch; she could be very dominant sometimes and very submissive to my father at other times. My sister, totally dominant, she's a total control freak and would like to control everything around her. My brother, a submissive for sure; he really knuckles under to my sister-in-law who's very dominant. I know my daughter would be a domme; as a matter of fact, she might actually be, she told me she's used her pink handcuffs on her boyfriend a few times. My son, a submissive. This is all just observations of power exchange, I have no idea about their sex lives and I don't want to. As far as actual kink goes, though, the only one I suspect is my daughter.

NBMG



CynthiaWVirginia -> RE: IF they were kinky, what would they be? (1/26/2013 12:34:14 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: NiceButMeanGirl

Okay, I'll play. lol

My father would have been a sadistic dominant, totally sadistic. My mother, I'm not sure, but maybe a switch; she could be very dominant sometimes and very submissive to my father at other times. My sister, totally dominant, she's a total control freak and would like to control everything around her. My brother, a submissive for sure; he really knuckles under to my sister-in-law who's very dominant. I know my daughter would be a domme; as a matter of fact, she might actually be, she told me she's used her pink handcuffs on her boyfriend a few times. My son, a submissive. This is all just observations of power exchange, I have no idea about their sex lives and I don't want to. As far as actual kink goes, though, the only one I suspect is my daughter.

NBMG


Loved this. [:D]

Okay, I'll bite too. My dad was a dumbinant. A swinger who could not get his wife into swinging, and a sadist who never admitted to himself that beating people gave him jollies. If he had woken up and put a label on it, it would have taken a hell of a mentor to put him onto a healthy path and wake him up to his responsibilities as Dominant.

Mom screams that she is vanilla, but with each marriage she was submissive. The guys even came to her job to pick up her check, having her sign it so that never saw a dime. She cleaned the house exactly how and when they wanted, same for dinner and everything else, but no no no, she was not "submissive", lol. The only reason why she was never tied up is because none of her husbands thought to use rope in that way.

My son...yep. I know he is sensitive to D/s on the subby side of the kneel and I know he likes some aspects of kink. Considering how prudish he is I find this amusing.

My sister is not into BDSM nor into D/s, lol. However...she shocked all of her friends and family (and set women back a hundred years) by insisting that obey be added into her marriage vows. (If she wants to buy a dress, she phones her husband for his permission, etc.) She's NOT kinky...but...vanilla sites would burn her at the stake if she mentioned that time she let some guy put M&Ms inside of her vagina and let him eat them out. [:D]

My aunt was "vanilla Domme" and collected a string of "vanilla submissives" who did all kinds of things for her for free, including building her a lovely outdoor structure for her to throw parties in, with glass on two sides. My cousin, her daughter, is not into BDSM but is "vanilla Domme" to men in her life. Fully functional D/s relationships going on strong but each person is deep in denial that it has anything to do with D/s.

I know a lot of people that "if they were kinky" and unafraid of being labeled would fit right in with our MAsT group. Most of the vanilla friends I attract...are submissive by nature and often service sub oriented. *shrugs*



LafayetteLady -> RE: IF they were kinky, what would they be? (1/26/2013 1:02:57 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: kalikshama

My parents had sex three times and it was strictly procreational.


Ah, now see, being as I was adopted, I can say that my parents didn't even do that!



LafayetteLady -> RE: IF they were kinky, what would they be? (1/26/2013 1:07:01 PM)

I do understand what you are saying LV, but still it is my parents. They also had a traditional relationship, where my father was the primary breadwinner and my mom raised us kids. I never saw them fight, EVER (really). I know once my mom got mad at my dad for something and he eventually brought her a card that said he was sorry and should go eat worms, lol. When my mother was sick, my father couldn't function. When my dad died, my mother never dated another man. I asked her why and she said that they were all looking for one thing, lol. I responded with, "well, they aren't all looking for that one thing but what is wrong with that one thing anyway?" Here is the testiment to their relationship: "I already had the best, what would I want with anyone else?"

So I think you might understand why I want to leave my thoughts and memories of them just as they are.



EsotericLady -> RE: IF they were kinky, what would they be? (1/26/2013 1:09:25 PM)

I look at my parents as people who encouraged my love of learning, my curiosity about life, the importance of random acts of kindness, manners, values, and words like Faith, Respect, Honesty, and Patriotism.

As far as I am concerned those far overshadow any desire to place them in a different kind of environment or even consider "what ifs."

As for my remaining family members... it isn't an interest of mine. : )
(Thank you)




Aneirin -> RE: IF they were kinky, what would they be? (1/26/2013 2:14:28 PM)

I can't even picture my parents having sex never mind D/s..... that's a thought too far.

But I used to play that game at the local munch, guess the orientation based on feeling and then find out what orientation was, not many came across to me as what they said they were, but the dominant ones that did come across as what they said they were were over powering.




cordeliasub -> RE: IF they were kinky, what would they be? (1/26/2013 2:21:58 PM)

OK, I guess I am a weirdo. I have wondered since entering this lifestyle about my own parents, just kind of seeing things in hindsight. My mom was a very strong and successful professional woman at work, but at home she served Dad. They weren't creepy or anything, but they were not shy about the fact that they were in love (still are), and I do remember seeing them flirt, seeing Dad come up behind Mom when she was washing dishes and wrap his arms around her. I have no idea what he would say to her, but she usually splashed water at him and laughed. I did have the teenage horror of coming into the house one night when they thought I was going straight to a restaurant after a football game and....yeah. EW. But let me put it this way, when Mom asked me if I wanted any advice about "the wedding night" and I said no thank you with a horrified look on my face, she just grinned and said "Well, let's just say it's really fun, so don;t be nervous." ACK!

Like I said, I guess I am weird, but I love the fact that my parents were in love with each other and still are after over 50 years. That was actually the kind of marriage I wanted too.

As far as other family members....I know a bit about my brother by default/accident, and yeah...he's the dominant one in his partnership. He should really be more careful about who he includes in notes on facebook lol.



LafayetteLady -> RE: IF they were kinky, what would they be? (1/26/2013 7:18:03 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: cordeliasub

Like I said, I guess I am weird, but I love the fact that my parents were in love with each other and still are after over 50 years. That was actually the kind of marriage I wanted too.



Nothing weird about wanting a marriage like your parents when it was like that. Weird would have been being ok with walking in and catching them!

I think when someone has a marriage like your parents or my parents, it gives us something to aspire to, and that is never weird or bad.



Kaliko -> RE: IF they were kinky, what would they be? (1/26/2013 7:26:55 PM)

FR

My family is full of sexual submissives. I don't have to pretend.



Moonlightmaddnes -> RE: IF they were kinky, what would they be? (1/26/2013 8:29:49 PM)

Honestly I am not sure. My mother was good at picking the biggest jerks who would treat her awful in every way then she would find out the latest love of her life was cheating and would leave heartbroken.

I have never sat down with my sister and asked since what she does is none of my business, but whenever I post anything kinky on facebook she always shares it or will tag me in something and say I saw this and knew you would love it. I did ask her how we always managed to like the same things as a joke and she said it must have something to do with our mother. LOL



MissToYouRedux -> RE: IF they were kinky, what would they be? (1/26/2013 11:09:39 PM)

My grandmother was a female supremacist, so it's not that hard to guess. [:D]



LdyViolet -> RE: IF they were kinky, what would they be? (1/27/2013 12:22:00 AM)

I love the responses :)

Just to clarify a little better, I meant people you know, not necessarily just family members... and I only look at if they would be more Dominant or submissive in a relationship, not the sexual aspect. A way to entertain myself when I'm bored, and sometimes people will give off vibes one way or another.



LdyViolet -> RE: IF they were kinky, what would they be? (1/27/2013 12:28:26 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: cordeliasub

Like I said, I guess I am weird, but I love the fact that my parents were in love with each other and still are after over 50 years. That was actually the kind of marriage I wanted too.



That sounds like mine. My mom just passed away a month ago, right before their 52nd anniversary. My dad was devoted to her from the day they met til she took her last breath, and probably will be for the rest of his life. When I divorced after 17 yrs, and 3 of my siblings had been divorced, I told them they had set the bar way too high. Definitely a hard act to follow.



Toppingfrmbottom -> RE: IF they were kinky, what would they be? (1/27/2013 12:29:43 AM)

I dont know. I guess she would not consider herself submissive, but she sometimes is.



chadra -> RE: IF they were kinky, what would they be? (1/27/2013 7:11:38 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: LdyViolet
Just to clarify a little better, I meant people you know, not necessarily just family members... and I only look at if they would be more Dominant or submissive in a relationship, not the sexual aspect.


I don't do this. I believe a lot of the time I'd be dead wrong.

I use myself as a case in point. I can almost guarantee that nobody in my regular life would put me on the submissive side if they thought about it. In my vanilla world, I just don't come across that way.

Interesting question though. :) I'm only saying that I think a lot of times, the guesses would be really... wrong.



cordeliasub -> RE: IF they were kinky, what would they be? (1/27/2013 8:13:50 AM)

My coworker and I used to joke about 50 Shades of Gray...then I asked her to look over some of my writing....and the one day she just came out and said she was into it. I laughed and told her I had wondered - she had wondered about me. She is more Dominant though, so it's kinda fun to talk about it from different perspectives. It's actually been kind of nice to have someone right across the office to talk to about things.

My best friend since 9th grade....I'd bet a million bucks she is Dominant, but I'll never actually ask lol



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