|
LaTigresse -> RE: Well I could've told you that! (2/2/2013 2:28:33 PM)
|
FR
Last night I came home from work to a clean house, dinner cooking (including freshly baked bread......from scratch mind you). Done by a man that in no way could be described as feminine or androgynous. He has always done a much better job of cleaning house than I. It's his nature, combined with 22 years in the military.
There are other, non traditional, gender tasks we seem to switch on as well. Just based on experience, talent, personal likes and dislikes, etc. I tend to remember to have autos serviced and notice when one isn't.........right...... more quickly than he. I will tackle a home improvement project head on, that causes him to cringe in uncertainty. Not because I am more masculine than he, but because I grew up around gear heads and in a house always in destruction and reconstruction. Going with my dad to construction sites and learning how to swing a hammer. He had neither experience. I know more about growing stuff as well. I also am a better cook than he, though he does pretty damned good.
He cleans house better than I, but I am the decorator. He can't even hang wall art properly..(proper placement, etc.) BUT, he remembers to actually dust it...
When it comes to finances, politics, history, geography he's got it going on. I defer to his knowledge because I know his strengths and my weaknesses.
I take care of my horses, but if a task needs an extra set of hands or more muscle, he offers or expects me to ask, for his help. He may bitch about my god damned fucking horses, but he will be there, by my side, loading bales of hay on a hot humid Iowa summer day. Not because it's the manly thing to do but because he loves me.
He has been a great father and has often times volunteered to take one or two of our grands, for a weekend, and do everything required, including meal prep, diaper changing, and bathing........because HE was the one that volunteered. I have yet to meet a woman that doesn't find that sexy as hell.
We've been married 22 1/2 years. He's not that hot young soldier, with washboard abs, that I met one summer 24 years ago, and his hair is going gray. But women half our age routinely hit on him even now. Not because he's some caveman macho dick. But because he is an intelligent, fun, well rounded, guy. Most of the guys around here wouldn't have a clue how to cook their dinner or clean up after themselves. They drive around in 4 wheel drive trucks, spend too much money on hunting gear and beer. They spend more time with the guys than they do their wives and kids. They also tend to end up divorced an awful lot.
Most marriages that I've seen last for many decades, there were no defined, men's work and women's work. There was the mindset of, who has the time and who is better at it........that's who does it.
Then you have guys like my father. Never ever did housework. Didn't want his wife working. Preferred her home, barefoot, raising babies. All of the money was HIS money. She would have beg for grocery money or to buy her kids, and self, needed clothing. My father now lives alone. Has two ex wives. And 6 estranged kids. Grand kids he's never met, and great grand kids he's never met. That old school macho shit didn't work out too well for him. I know quite a few guys like him.
|
|
|
|
