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help - 2/10/2013 12:12:54 PM

GoddessBych21

Posts: 28
Joined: 7/22/2012
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I think im interested in shemales. Any advice? Help?

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RE: help - 2/10/2013 12:14:56 PM

DaddySatyr

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From: Pittston, Pennsyltucky
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Try getting acquainted with some "shemales" (NOT a very P.C. term, dear) and see what happens?

Peace and comfort,

Michael

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RE: help - 2/10/2013 12:17:52 PM

Pyramus

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Start with a subject line that shows you have a brain.

(in reply to DaddySatyr)

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RE: help - 2/10/2013 12:21:21 PM

SylvereApLeanan

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First, stop calling them "shemales." It's a derogatory slur toward trans* people. Second, why do you think you're "interested" in them? Are you fetishizing trans* women or are you simply open to partners of any gender identity? If you're fetishizing trans* women, then stop. Non-consensual objectification of other people is creepy.

The best way to find a quality partner of any gender identity is to be the kind of person who attracts quality people of all gender identities. Work on yourself and the rest will follow.

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RE: help - 2/10/2013 12:22:14 PM

littlewonder

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be nice

be nice

be nice

I'm trying really really hard!

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RE: help - 2/10/2013 12:24:10 PM

thracia

Posts: 38
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I think it's a troll; but in case it's not, all the above applies as good advice for the OP;

1. Look up a better word for what you ask.

2. Figure out how to compose a descriptive sentence when you're writing a thread title.

3. Be nice ... be nice ... be nice (my sentiments also).

(in reply to littlewonder)

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RE: help - 2/10/2013 12:25:05 PM

agent0fchaos

Posts: 34
Joined: 1/31/2013
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This might be of use to you. It's a 101 introduction to trans* individuals.

Trans* 101

It's pretty short, and has a section on the idea of "shemale"

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RE: help - 2/10/2013 12:39:30 PM

SeekingTrinity

Posts: 1834
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From: The 'burbs of Portland, OR
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quote:

ORIGINAL: SylvereApLeanan

First, stop calling them "shemales." It's a derogatory slur toward trans* people. Second, why do you think you're "interested" in them? Are you fetishizing trans* women or are you simply open to partners of any gender identity? If you're fetishizing trans* women, then stop. Non-consensual objectification of other people is creepy.

The best way to find a quality partner of any gender identity is to be the kind of person who attracts quality people of all gender identities. Work on yourself and the rest will follow.

^^^^^ this x1000.

(in reply to SylvereApLeanan)

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RE: help - 2/10/2013 12:53:04 PM

GoddessBych21

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Joined: 7/22/2012
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So sorry for the term I used I did not know itwas rude. Also I am kinda new at this forum thing so please excuse me for not being perfect.

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RE: help - 2/10/2013 1:24:15 PM

DarkSteven

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I'm a bit confused. Your profile makes it clear that you're a couple. Your post here sounds like you're just the female or male half.

So:

1. Is this attraction something that both of you feel?
2. Just what about MtFs is it that you like?
3. What kind of help do you want? How to meet them? How to approach them? What?

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RE: help - 2/10/2013 1:34:54 PM

TNDommeK

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Wow that trans 101 link was very helpful! I love learning new things.

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RE: help - 2/10/2013 1:44:58 PM

kiwisub12

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Ya know, i know a transgender person, and am priviliged to be her friend - and she would eat you up and spit you out for depersonalising her. This is as bad as someone looking for a blond sub, or a fat slave. You aren't thinking of the person as an individual, but as a delivery system for your fantasies - and that is not cool.

How about you meet people , get to know them, then decide if you click sexually, personality and other -wises. Not just make an inane post on cm and sit back and wait and see what happens.

(in reply to GoddessBych21)

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RE: help - 2/10/2013 1:45:35 PM

TheLilSquaw

Posts: 2340
Joined: 10/24/2012
From: Middle River, MD
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quote:

ORIGINAL: SylvereApLeanan

First, stop calling them "shemales." It's a derogatory slur toward trans* people. Second, why do you think you're "interested" in them? Are you fetishizing trans* women or are you simply open to partners of any gender identity? If you're fetishizing trans* women, then stop. Non-consensual objectification of other people is creepy.

The best way to find a quality partner of any gender identity is to be the kind of person who attracts quality people of all gender identities. Work on yourself and the rest will follow.

This x 1000

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(in reply to SylvereApLeanan)

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RE: help - 2/10/2013 1:49:32 PM

TNDommeK

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I will say, I was ignorant on facts of how to address, amount other things, transgendered people. Thank goodness for the people I have met on here that help me out when I sound clueless.

I think the op made a mistake that she had no idea she was making. We can't always be perfect.

Op I advise you to read that trans 101 link, and see if it helps you out. And then try to seek with new knowledge. However, once a post has been posted, it can only be removed with the help of a mod. So don't be discouraged but learn from your mistake and move forward.

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Our snark-nado needs more cowbell

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RE: help - 2/10/2013 1:51:42 PM

PeonForHer

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quote:

ORIGINAL: TNDommeK

I will say, I was ignorant on facts of how to address, amount other things, transgendered people. Thank goodness for the people I have met on here that help me out when I sound clueless.

Indeed. That link showed me that I was quite hazy on some things.

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RE: help - 2/10/2013 1:54:11 PM

Desertrose5

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I find that most transgdered people are fine if you ask them what pronoun they prefer, but generally speaking the following holds true:
1. If they look female or dress as a female - us the feminine pronoun
2. If they look male or dress as a male - use the masculine pronoun

(in reply to TNDommeK)

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RE: help - 2/10/2013 2:11:17 PM

lizi

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Joined: 2/1/2009
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quote:

ORIGINAL: TNDommeK

I will say, I was ignorant on facts of how to address, amount other things, transgendered people. Thank goodness for the people I have met on here that help me out when I sound clueless.

I think the op made a mistake that she had no idea she was making. We can't always be perfect.

Op I advise you to read that trans 101 link, and see if it helps you out. And then try to seek with new knowledge. However, once a post has been posted, it can only be removed with the help of a mod. So don't be discouraged but learn from your mistake and move forward.

She did say she made a mistake, what is rubbing me the wrong way though is that she seems to be looking for a certain type of human being like a toy that she wants to play with. It's the same as when younger men start threads on wanting an older woman, or anyone is looking for a characteristic instead of a person. Those threads don't generally go well for the reason that the objectified group wants to be seen and valued as a person and not as a pair of tits, a big penis, or as young/old/white/black.

Btw, she's still got up in her profile a journal entry about looking for a shemale, makes you wonder if her apology here was sincere or if she was being snarky about making a mistake. OP, I wish you luck, I think you need to understand that this site is for people that are interested in BDSM, it doesn't necessarily mean that we're all easy or looking for sex with anyone making an offer. Most of us, regardless of what flavor we are, want to be approached like a human being, have meaningful conversation, and form friendships before getting naked. Whatever you are looking for can be approached much like dating. Approach the object of your interest like a person that you want to get to know and get to know them.

(in reply to TNDommeK)

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RE: help - 2/10/2013 3:09:36 PM

GoddessBych21

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I do not wish to seek a person just to use as a thing none of you know me as a person so please do not judge me. I admited I made a mistake I realy honestly did and just because I still have that journal entry up does not mean I was not sincere in my apology maybe it means that I had something to do and haven't got to deleteing it yet. Did any of you think of that before you accused my appology? I do understand that I made a mistake and I do understand what my original post made me sound like a horrible person but I truly am not. I appologize to all that were offended by that. It is both of us who are interested (not just for a toy) I am not heartless I am not perfect I do not know everything. As I stated I am still new at all the terms and rules. Again I am sorry

(in reply to lizi)

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RE: help - 2/10/2013 3:16:53 PM

Level

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There are a lot of people who come here and make provacative posts intentionally. They don't get the warmest reception... but if someone makes an honest mistake (or two), and makes adjustments, they're usually accepted.

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