RE: FinDom

RE: FinDom (Full Version)

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OsideGirl -> RE: FinDom (2/13/2013 9:08:04 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ryandb Have either of you browsed through the profiles labeled as female dominate? Have you browsed the profiles and seen how many people don't know that dominate is a verb and someone cannot be a "dominate"? Everyone that doesn't know the difference between "dominate" and "dominant" must be fake.

stef -> RE: FinDom (2/13/2013 9:39:20 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ryandb I think anyone putting in their profile that they are a findom and do this for tribute ought to be immediately deleted!!! That is not what BDSM is about!! People who whine about what "BDSM is about" ought to be immediately deleted. From the gene pool.

LadyPact -> RE: FinDom (2/13/2013 9:51:08 AM)
To answer your question, no, you are not right. Other than saying what the BDSM acronym stands for, you don't get to dictate to others what BDSM is about. I'm the first person to say that BDSM is bondage, discipline, sadism, and masochism. Even at that, the kink world is also about fetishes, authority dynamics, and all kinds of other things that people enjoy. You don't get to say what other people enjoy isn't acceptable. As for violating TOS, nah, they don't. TOS is actually pretty well written from a legal standpoint. You went to another site and gave somebody money or gave your credit card information? Sorry to tell you, but that one is on you. CM didn't make you do that. In fact, they warned you against it so you really don't have a legal leg to stand on.

VoluptuousVenus -> RE: FinDom (2/13/2013 9:53:12 AM)
First, I'd like to say that I'm sorry that you paid tributes to people who didn't deserve it. That's horrible. However, your mistake in trusting the wrong people does not mean that everybody who says they offer financial domination is a con artist. Do you understand that? If you start chatting with women here, you'll probably find that most of us get mail from men who aren't really submissive or dominant. They're just slapping on a label to try and scam us out of adventurous sex. The fact that those guys weren't what they claimed to be doesn't suddenly invalidate all other men who fall under the labels of "submissive" or "dominant". The same holds true with financial domination. Sure, some people are just looking to scam you out of a quick buck. Some, like me, actually enjoy it and have fun establishing a real connection with people.

ryandb -> RE: FinDom (2/13/2013 10:06:05 AM)
I am not saying a tribute shouldn't be apart of the kink, what I am saying is when it is the first and last words in a dommes message. "IF you can't tribute, don't bother talking to me" , "No time wasters".. "If you can't pay, then move on", "I am here for one thing only, Your money". Take a look at the profiles and tell me that those words do not dominate the majority of the female dominates on this site. Tribute is one thing, paying someone for their time and expertise is all good. What is not GOOD is if that is why they are here..... AND over the past year or so that I've spent on here, NOT ONE person I've had the chance to have a conversation did anything but ask for money. No 'adventitious sex" no "humiliation" none of the things that were listed on a profile. And if one can't even chat or message with someone long enough to get to know them, how would anyone weed out the fakes. Who wants to be a 'time waster', i don't want to waste someones time, cuz I won't pay tribute within the first few sentences. Most of you defending this are on that side of the debate because this might be how you earn a living. And that's fine. I have no problem with that end. What I am describing here are people who are here just to scam.. There is a difference between a findom and a scam artist, and from my experience it is easy spot on the profiles. The words, "Don't waste my time, tribute needs to come first".. Means that person seems to have no interest in getting to know and then actually being in sexual control of another.

LadyPact -> RE: FinDom (2/13/2013 10:27:30 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ryandb I am not saying a tribute shouldn't be apart of the kink, what I am saying is when it is the first and last words in a dommes message. "IF you can't tribute, don't bother talking to me" , "No time wasters".. "If you can't pay, then move on", "I am here for one thing only, Your money". Take a look at the profiles and tell me that those words do not dominate the majority of the female dominates on this site. Tribute is one thing, paying someone for their time and expertise is all good. What is not GOOD is if that is why they are here..... AND over the past year or so that I've spent on here, NOT ONE person I've had the chance to have a conversation did anything but ask for money. No 'adventitious sex" no "humiliation" none of the things that were listed on a profile. And if one can't even chat or message with someone long enough to get to know them, how would anyone weed out the fakes. Who wants to be a 'time waster', i don't want to waste someones time, cuz I won't pay tribute within the first few sentences. Most of you defending this are on that side of the debate because this might be how you earn a living. And that's fine. I have no problem with that end. What I am describing here are people who are here just to scam.. There is a difference between a findom and a scam artist, and from my experience it is easy spot on the profiles. The words, "Don't waste my time, tribute needs to come first".. Means that person seems to have no interest in getting to know and then actually being in sexual control of another. Since I just got into this shit last night with someone else, before you do another thing, go read My profile. Do it right now so we can have an intelligent conversation. (The last one couldn't, so I'm giving you a chance to do better than him.) After you've read My profile, I want you to tell Me why a lifestyle Dominant like Myself is going to sit for hours on end 'chatting' with anybody and everybody. Frankly, I'd tell you to suck it up, get out from behind your computer, and go to a lifestyle event. Now, you tell Me why you are different than thousands upon THOUSANDS of other guys who are on the net. I'm a patient chick. I'll wait.

muhly22222 -> RE: FinDom (2/13/2013 10:37:45 AM)
quote: No 'adventitious sex" I've never had adventitious sex, either. It always seems to be planned. [8D]

ryandb -> RE: FinDom (2/13/2013 10:45:41 AM)
LadyPact, There are two sides to the equation.. If you don't enjoy sitting there on the other-side of the screen or don't enjoy dominating for the sake of it, then don't do it. Why do you need to be 'paid' to do it? That is in fact then prostitution.. Rather or not sex is being had.. That means one person is getting off by paying another to get them off. No you shouldn't have to sit infront of anyone or everyone.. You can choose, but if it is going to be because I have a phat bank roll from the get go, forget it.

OsideGirl -> RE: FinDom (2/13/2013 11:09:43 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ryandb Most of you defending this are on that side of the debate because this might be how you earn a living. Other than making grown men cry, this isn't even close to how I earn a living.

freedomdwarf1 -> RE: FinDom (2/13/2013 11:19:01 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ryandb And just in case any of you think I am making this up, here is just a sample of profiles found within 5 minutes of searching, all of them most likely scams... Yes it is stupid to give your money out, but that's not my point... I've been browsing and what I find is a lot of the following profiles, and then some even very interesting profiles that have no financial domination listed, and yet still require that domination within the first email. It ruins the reputation of all, to have so many bad apples. : The first thing you have to learn is that they are NOT 'bad apples' as you put it. Just because their kink isn't yours or meets with your indignant approval doesn't mean they should be banned on CM or anywhere else. It doesn't ruin anything and I really don't know why you have such an obtuse PoV about it. If you don't like it, hide, block, and move on. And, FWIW, you aren't supposed to name and shame on these boards - that isn't allowed here. Try reading the rules of CM and their ToS.

tazzygirl -> RE: FinDom (2/13/2013 11:32:24 AM)
The link, third up from the bottom, is a default profile that opens up to many different accounts each time you click on it. I click, I get one account, click again, get another. In your careless, righteous indignation against something you dont understand, and have no desire to tolerate, you have labeled users who have nothing to do with your whine fest here. Way to go!

ryandb -> RE: FinDom (2/13/2013 11:53:42 AM)
They are bad apples.. It is NOT a kink to set there and drain off someone's bank account while not actually engaging in conversation or any other activity. It is deceptive.

tazzygirl -> RE: FinDom (2/13/2013 12:05:55 PM)
So, let me get this straight. Two people are not allowed to make a consensual decision to enter into a form of a relationship because YOU dont approve of what they are doing. Are you now the decider as to what is legal or what isnt? Much of what we do in this lifestyle isnt "legal". Do some of it in public and its a felony. But when TWO people decide to enter into a financial relationship, its made consensually. Surely you arent suggesting these women (and there are some FinDoms so its not just women), are forcing men to give over their bank accounts, credit card numbers, ect, are you?

freedomdwarf1 -> RE: FinDom (2/13/2013 12:15:34 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ryandb They are bad apples.. It is NOT a kink to set there and drain off someone's bank account while not actually engaging in conversation or any other activity. It is deceptive. No, it's a kink known as being a Findom/Findomme. And there are many that require a tribute before they will interact with you. It isn't much different to going on a pay site - you pay up-front or you don't get to chat. Simples! [:D] If you don't like it - ignore and move on! What is sooo hard for you to understand?? Personally, I can't stand them. But just because they aren't my thing, I just ignore them. You need to learn to do the same.

Hillwilliam -> RE: FinDom (2/13/2013 12:17:42 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ryandb They are bad apples.. It is NOT a kink to set there and drain off someone's bank account while not actually engaging in conversation or any other activity. It is deceptive. Personally, I don't get it at all BUT. If someone gets all hard and leaky from an out of the ordinary activity, it IS a kink. It might be stupid but it's a kink.

TheLilSquaw1 -> RE: FinDom (2/13/2013 12:48:00 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ryandb They are bad apples.. It is NOT a kink to set there and drain off someone's bank account while not actually engaging in conversation or any other activity. It is deceptive. Even the links you posted where not being deceptive. They told you up front what to expect. Now if you can't read or comprehend what they have posted. Well frankly, you're an adult. So THAT is on you. Not them. You didn't have a gun held to your head. You were not forced into giving money to them. You were not coerced. You made an adult decision be an adult and live with the consequences.

TNDommeK -> RE: FinDom (2/13/2013 6:00:21 PM)
[sm=banghead.gif][sm=banghead.gif][sm=blasted.gif][sm=boohoo.gif]

ShaharThorne -> RE: FinDom (2/13/2013 7:42:31 PM)
Love the new avatar, Squaw! If only I had a foot fetish and and pedicure kit. Seriously, OP, you claim to be a regular...you claim to be on FL...yet you are raising caine about a selected few. Not all FinDom/mes are balding men or cute little girls under the influence of some man making them get your money. My demands are simple...dark chocolate, rib eye steaks and Nike crosstrainers. All I have got is subs contacting me and friends with whom I exchange cards with. I really need the crosstrainers because I need to start walking again to get back down to 200...I was 325 last year and am at 270 now. Besides, Mom paid for the exercise bike...

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