RE: Why A Slave?

RE: Why A Slave? (Full Version)

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Greta75 -> RE: Why A Slave? (6/4/2013 7:46:25 PM)
quote: I asked you before... do you see me as a victim? Tazzy, it's hard for me to see you as a victim, as you are very strong-willed. And your actions, being able to break apart from your master indicates immense strength. It's seriously not easy. And you know that. This other woman, I'd consider weak-willed.

JeffBC -> RE: Why A Slave? (6/4/2013 7:46:51 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Spiritedsub2 I found this surprisingly comforting, that one can be a sub/slave without at all needing a master (wanting is a different story). I tend to assume that not needing a master means I'm really not submissive. Carol is clearly and obviously submissive... to me... to everyone. But Carol does not need a master. She's a perfectly competent individual perfectly able to make her way through the world. If I or someone else isn't there to tell her what to do then she figures it out herself. Carol "prefers to defer".

tazzygirl -> RE: Why A Slave? (6/4/2013 7:47:53 PM)
quote: Carol "prefers to defer". Grins. Concise and perfectly explained.

tazzygirl -> RE: Why A Slave? (6/4/2013 7:52:23 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Greta75 quote: I asked you before... do you see me as a victim? Tazzy, it's hard for me to see you as a victim, as you are very strong-willed. And your actions, being able to break apart from your master indicates immense strength. It's seriously not easy. And you know that. This other woman, I'd consider weak-willed. I didnt "break apart". He let me go. As many times as I tried to leave and stay gone, I couldnt. Once he gave me permission, I was free to do as I pleased. But If you think I didnt go through the emotional roller-coaster before I got that permission.... Let me say this... if he was abusive, he never would have allowed her to speak to anyone he didnt know. And since she told you so much, he allowed her to speak to you when he was not there watching. Either you got "took" or things arent as bad as she made them out to be. Either way, drop the victim comments. Its really offensive to believe that someone in a TPE relationship is considered a victim by someone who doesnt understand it.

Aswad -> RE: Why A Slave? (6/4/2013 8:10:03 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Greta75 It's a psychological thing, he also does other things like gather her up, hug her, kiss her, and telling her what a good girl she is when she is sobbing and crying after being forced to do what she does not want to do. Sounds like a ton of other doms out there. It's called aftercare, if memory serves. IWYW, — Aswad.

tazzygirl -> RE: Why A Slave? (6/4/2013 8:11:36 PM)
Forgotten already? [:D]

Aswad -> RE: Why A Slave? (6/4/2013 8:13:20 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Greta75 This other woman, I'd consider weak-willed. I'm curious as to how much of that assessment comes from a projection of your own relationship preferences. As tazzygirl said, no small number of women find it offensive to be dismissed as "weak-willed" "victims" simply for pursuing the kind of relationship dynamic they prefer... even if they're going through a rough patch at the time. IWYW, — Aswad.

Aswad -> RE: Why A Slave? (6/4/2013 8:14:53 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: tazzygirl Forgotten already? [:D] You offering to refresh my memory? [;)] IWYW, — Aswad.

JeffBC -> RE: Why A Slave? (6/4/2013 8:18:06 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Aswad quote: ORIGINAL: Greta75 This other woman, I'd consider weak-willed. I'm curious as to how much of that assessment comes from a projection of your own relationship preferences. As tazzygirl said, no small number of women find it offensive to be dismissed as "weak-willed" "victims" simply for pursuing the kind of relationship dynamic they prefer... even if they're going through a rough patch at the time. Actually, Carol is "weak willed". That's what it means to be "socially submissive". To quote a famous line though, a great question to ask is "So how's that working for you?" In Carol's case it's working out pretty well. To misquote Indiana Jones, "She chose wisely".

Aswad -> RE: Why A Slave? (6/4/2013 8:22:35 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: JeffBC Actually, Carol is "weak willed". That's what it means to be "socially submissive". And I don't have a problem with that. But I said «"weak-willed" "victim"», and it hasn't been my impression that either of you would call her a victim. [:D] IWYW, — Aswad.

Greta75 -> RE: Why A Slave? (6/4/2013 8:35:57 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: tazzygirl Let me say this... if he was abusive, he never would have allowed her to speak to anyone he didnt know. And since she told you so much, he allowed her to speak to you when he was not there watching. I disagree, I'm just a stranger on the internet, so I am not threat to him. He wants her to speak with someone she doesn't know, in a very controlled situation where he has full control to prevent her from contacting me again or me from contacting her. If he allows her to speak to form re-occuring friendships, that's a different story, that would be caring. Tazzy, you didn't think your dom is abusive, so his not abusive. This chick express to me in a way where I believe she believes he is crossing the line.

Greta75 -> RE: Why A Slave? (6/4/2013 8:38:24 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: JeffBC Actually, Carol is "weak willed". That's what it means to be "socially submissive". To quote a famous line though, a great question to ask is "So how's that working for you?" In Carol's case it's working out pretty well. To misquote Indiana Jones, "She chose wisely". I can definitely see Carol walking away if she feels you are toxic to her, so I don't consider her weak-willed.

littlewonder -> RE: Why A Slave? (6/4/2013 8:39:45 PM)
I'm just amazed that in this day and age that so many people still, even after everything that they have read and heard and even seen, that they still fall for these scams. I can't tell you how many times I have heard the exact same thing that Greta is saying and it has been, each and every single time, someone getting their jollies off, watching the person being gullible and naive. Greta, unless you have actually met in person, face to face, this girl or even this guy, assume it's a scam because I'm betting 99.9% it is.

Greta75 -> RE: Why A Slave? (6/4/2013 8:40:04 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Aswad I'm curious as to how much of that assessment comes from a projection of your own relationship preferences. As tazzygirl said, no small number of women find it offensive to be dismissed as "weak-willed" "victims" simply for pursuing the kind of relationship dynamic they prefer... even if they're going through a rough patch at the time. I don't base it on my personal preference. I based it on happiness "index" of the sub. If this girl was sharing me what her master does and how much she love giving up all that control and being forced to do all those stuffs. I'd be happy for her. Then she's not a victim. I mean, how can being unhappy in a relationship be healthy?

JeffBC -> RE: Why A Slave? (6/4/2013 8:42:46 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Aswad quote: ORIGINAL: JeffBC Actually, Carol is "weak willed". That's what it means to be "socially submissive". And I don't have a problem with that. But I said «"weak-willed" "victim"», and it hasn't been my impression that either of you would call her a victim. [:D] Well, I suppose we might. It'd be just as ludicrous when we do it as when strangers do but hey, we could give it a go. Carol: Help, Help! I'm being repressed! The more serious point here is that even "weak willed" is not necessarily the kiss of death -- or even a problem. Carol's answer to that is simply to have a well developed spidey sense. The asshats get weeded out early before they have a chance to establish any serious control. In other words, even SuperDom with a weak willed submissive needs some time to set his hooks.

Greta75 -> RE: Why A Slave? (6/4/2013 8:44:41 PM)
quote: Greta, unless you have actually met in person, face to face, this girl or even this guy, assume it's a scam because I'm betting 99.9% it is. I don't believe it is. I really believe this one. Infact, one of my biggest concern is that she's being used to service other men. And her master collects money for it. Such things are not uncommon in my region. Prostitution isn't even illegal. I believe she is a victim. And she has sign up to be a slave. Being a slave means you do whatever your master say, but it doesn't say your master cannot profit from you. And you know what, I don't even care if a master collects money for sharing his slave, as long as the slave is happy with the situation and gets off on it.

tazzygirl -> RE: Why A Slave? (6/4/2013 8:47:13 PM)
Ok. Im going to go look for Arpig again.

littlewonder -> RE: Why A Slave? (6/4/2013 8:49:26 PM)
I swear he's back! He has to be!

Aswad -> RE: Why A Slave? (6/4/2013 8:53:04 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Greta75 I based it on happiness "index" of the sub. If you can accurately gauge her long term happiness from a few conversations with her, you're a heck of a lot better at reading people than I am, to the tune of "you should talk to someone so your skillset can be preserved through research" or thereabouts. The less exceptional claim would be a perfectly average level of accuracy in gauging your own accuracy, but that doesn't seem to be the claim you're making, which brings us back to the reasonable expectation of exceptional proof. quote: I mean, how can being unhappy in a relationship be healthy? There's a difference between going through a rough patch, and ongoing long term misery. Both me and my beloved have had plenty of rough patches, but we've overall been happy with each other for 15 years. How long have you been 'monitoring' this sub? IWYW, — Aswad.

Aswad -> RE: Why A Slave? (6/4/2013 8:57:24 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: JeffBC Carol: Help, Help! I'm being repressed! Aswad: Put a cock in it, lady. [:D] quote: The more serious point here is that even "weak willed" is not necessarily the kiss of death -- or even a problem. Agreed. quote: Carol's answer to that is simply to have a well developed spidey sense. The asshats get weeded out early before they have a chance to establish any serious control. In other words, even SuperDom with a weak willed submissive needs some time to set his hooks. That works. Would that all subs had a well developed spider sense, ideally from square one. As you say, it takes time to do any significant "rewiring". IWYW, — Aswad.

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