ladyevermore
Posts: 7
Joined: 3/24/2013
Status: offline
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Good evening,
It may be a simple case of your submissive testing the boundaries, and in so doing testing you. It is easy to assign tasks and give praise, but the core of any D/s relationship, of any kind, is in the restrictions placed on a submissive by the Dominant, and in the willingness to follow through on the punishment should those restrictions not be met. Punishment, both swift and harsh, is an integral part of the dynamic, and not following through or being lenient is the same as breaking a promise. You are not less of a Dominant for being uneasy about your first punishment, it goes outside of what we have been taught our entire lives, against everything we know of being kind to others. But you have to remember that in this instance, being cruel IS being kind. The submissive expects and craves punishment if they go outside the boundaries of their service, and to not provide that would make any submissive lose trust. Take heart in knowing that everyone goes through this feeling at first, and that being harsh now will build a deeper connection between the two of you later on.
Regards,
Lady Evermore
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RE: First Punishment - 
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