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RE: Making a memorable weekend - 3/24/2013 11:15:20 AM   
CynthiaWVirginia


Posts: 1915
Joined: 2/28/2010
From: West Virginia, USA
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quote:

Honestly, sometimes I think it's a fucking miracle that anyone new stays here.




Amen.

(in reply to Spiritedsub2)
Profile   Post #: 61
RE: Making a memorable weekend - 3/24/2013 11:25:14 AM   
OsideGirl


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Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
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quote:

ORIGINAL: seekingreality


Personally, I am not a fan of the "give me some generic kinky scenarios" approach. What makes the experience exciting and memorable is the people.


I agree with this. It would also lose some of it's sparkle for me if I found out that he hadn't come up with the ideas on his own. Kind of Cyrano de Bergerac-ish for me.

Lady Pact and MP - Jeff and Carol - Happy Anniversary! I wish you many, many more!

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RE: Making a memorable weekend - 3/24/2013 11:39:38 AM   
Spiritedsub2


Posts: 3316
Joined: 7/18/2012
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quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl


quote:

ORIGINAL: seekingreality


Personally, I am not a fan of the "give me some generic kinky scenarios" approach. What makes the experience exciting and memorable is the people.


I agree with this. It would also lose some of it's sparkle for me if I found out that he hadn't come up with the ideas on his own. Kind of Cyrano de Bergerac-ish for me.


I don't see why every kinky couple must invent the kinky wheel anew by themselves. On other forums I engage with (crafting, dog care, an attorney one), we share knowledge, techniques, and ask each other for ideas. Uniquely here does that seem to be regarded as lazy or lacking in creative imagination.

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Profile   Post #: 63
RE: Making a memorable weekend - 3/24/2013 12:51:01 PM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Spiritedsub2


quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl


quote:

ORIGINAL: seekingreality


Personally, I am not a fan of the "give me some generic kinky scenarios" approach. What makes the experience exciting and memorable is the people.


I agree with this. It would also lose some of it's sparkle for me if I found out that he hadn't come up with the ideas on his own. Kind of Cyrano de Bergerac-ish for me.


I don't see why every kinky couple must invent the kinky wheel anew by themselves. On other forums I engage with (crafting, dog care, an attorney one), we share knowledge, techniques, and ask each other for ideas. Uniquely here does that seem to be regarded as lazy or lacking in creative imagination.


I'm not suggesting that every kinky couple re-invent the wheel. Nor did I say he was lazy. But, I would hope that his ideas were based on us....not someone else. And I stated that FOR ME, it would be disappointing that he is mimicking what someone else came up with rather than putting the thoughts into "Us".

While you share knowledge about crafts, pets etc, I don't view the same as asking a bunch of complete strangers how you should have sex within your own relationship.



< Message edited by OsideGirl -- 3/24/2013 12:52:21 PM >

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Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

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Profile   Post #: 64
RE: Making a memorable weekend - 3/24/2013 1:44:39 PM   
Spiritedsub2


Posts: 3316
Joined: 7/18/2012
Status: offline 		For me, the sharing of knowledge and experiences about D/s, bdsm, relationships founded on that, are the main reason I participate on this forum; the same reasons I participate on the crafts and pets and business forums.

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Profile   Post #: 65
RE: Making a memorable weekend - 3/24/2013 2:50:14 PM   
MasterPenis


Posts: 6
Joined: 8/16/2012
Status: offline 		I apologize for calling the rookie a rookie.

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Profile   Post #: 66
RE: Making a memorable weekend - 3/24/2013 3:41:56 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Spiritedsub2
I don't see why every kinky couple must invent the kinky wheel anew by themselves. On other forums I engage with (crafting, dog care, an attorney one), we share knowledge, techniques, and ask each other for ideas. Uniquely here does that seem to be regarded as lazy or lacking in creative imagination.
Ok, but the parallel to this is somebody coming onto your craft forum saying, "I don't know what to make, how to make it, and I have no idea of what purpose it's going to have when finished."



_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to Spiritedsub2)
Profile   Post #: 67
RE: Making a memorable weekend - 3/24/2013 4:12:53 PM   
HarryVanWinkle


Posts: 1720
Joined: 5/8/2006
Status: offline 		I've had lots of them. But, the entire post seems like a fishing expedition for material to masturbate to. What incentive do I have to provide that material?

quote:

ORIGINAL: LordUberMaster

Harry: Maybe not all suggestions will be suitable in my case, but I'm sure some of you have had memorable experiences that might inspire others.



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Profile   Post #: 68
RE: Making a memorable weekend - 3/24/2013 4:54:34 PM   
Spiritedsub2


Posts: 3316
Joined: 7/18/2012
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

quote:

ORIGINAL: Spiritedsub2
I don't see why every kinky couple must invent the kinky wheel anew by themselves. On other forums I engage with (crafting, dog care, an attorney one), we share knowledge, techniques, and ask each other for ideas. Uniquely here does that seem to be regarded as lazy or lacking in creative imagination.
Ok, but the parallel to this is somebody coming onto your craft forum saying, "I don't know what to make, how to make it, and I have no idea of what purpose it's going to have when finished."



Really? The original post talked about previous experiences with previous subs; I didn't get the "blank slate" impression from his OP. Using the craft forum example from your post, people of varying levels of experience with the craft post questions, samples of their work, and answer in detail the question "how did you do that"? That is how I learned most of the techniques I know in that craft, and I pass on what I've learned to those who ask. I definitely don't denigrate or shame the person who joined the forum to learn for asking.

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Don’t grieve. Anything you lose comes round in another form.
~ Rumi

Laughing Dolphin

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Profile   Post #: 69
RE: Making a memorable weekend - 3/24/2013 5:12:42 PM   
xssve


Posts: 3589
Joined: 10/10/2009
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quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressDarkArt

Make a memorable weekend? Well sh*t, try a nice dinner out, flowers, a good movie, bring her coffee in bed, a nice spring walk hand-in-hand somewhere pretty, rub her feet, scratch her back, and brush her hair. No mystery there; that would certainly do it for lots of women.



C'mon, this is lord Übermaster...

....followed by an ass ripping domfest on Pikes Peak at dawn.

On the rocks.

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Profile   Post #: 70
RE: Making a memorable weekend - 3/24/2013 6:33:26 PM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline 		Let's see...this sub of yours doesn't laugh and has a low libido. Have you asked her to get a physical or talk to a therapist? It sounds like she's either depressed or she has some kind of physical ailment or she is one of these bitter, jaded women who trusts no one. Personally, I'd be seriously questioning this person. I'd either be very concerned or they would be someone I would run far, far away from.


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Profile   Post #: 71
RE: Making a memorable weekend - 3/24/2013 6:45:08 PM   
xssve


Posts: 3589
Joined: 10/10/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LordUberMaster

Oh, right, the profile. Yeah, I guess one should never use irony on the internet.

LadyPact: I should probably have made it more clear that I did actually know them quite well before, and that's the case this time as well.

Irony? Oh, ho, ho, irony! Oh, no, no, we don't get that here. See, uh, people ski topless here while smoking dope, so irony's not really a, a high priority. We haven't had any irony here since about, uh, '83, when I was the only practitioner of it. And I stopped because I was tired of being stared at.

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Profile   Post #: 72
RE: Making a memorable weekend - 3/24/2013 7:26:25 PM   
graceadieu


Posts: 1518
Joined: 3/20/2008
From: Maryland
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LordUberMaster

graceadieu: I see what you mean. But I'd like to think we've already established a connection. Maybe this weekend is more about fun.

She lives in the city, I live in a smaller town. I've known her a few months, I visit her when I'm in the city, but she hasn't been here yet. In between, we talk on the phone - as in, maybe 5-6 hours a day on average. She's made it pretty clear that when she comes here she wants to do more than talk.


Okay, it's great you have a connection already. Have you confirmed with her that she wants to spend the whole weekend playing?

Since she's never been to visit you before, maybe you could show her around town, take her out to eat, then come home and have a fun play time. Maybe the next day, you all could get together with some friends and go to a movie or skiing or something. When I think of a nice memorable weekend together, it'd be something like that. (Actually, these days, it would just be any time where we actually have a whole weekend off and not have to spend all Saturday working, lol.)

It's really going to depend on what her interests are, both kinky and vanilla, and we can't know that she might like without some more information.

(in reply to LordUberMaster)
Profile   Post #: 73
RE: Making a memorable weekend - 3/25/2013 5:03:22 AM   
chatterbox24


Posts: 2182
Joined: 1/22/2012
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: CynthiaWVirginia

quote:

Honestly, sometimes I think it's a fucking miracle that anyone new stays here.




Amen.


Triple amen Sista!
A simple question was asked for ideas for a good time, what is weird about that? But no! wait! That can't simply be answered. The poster has to be critiqued, and by the time it is over, either they are fake, a troll, they need therapy, or someone in their circle does. and dont joke damn it, its against the law.LOL.

The blind fold idea was awesome but I cant imagine having that done for an entire weekend, that would be kinda scarey, but a lil exciting too. I think a tasting, scent or texture blindfold for a short time would be cool to heighten the senses. BUt dont tell her you got the idea somewhere else, she might run off into the wall trying to escape, because you are so unorginal hahahahha.

OMG, Masters and doms are giving massages to feet and running baths now, and serving subs? WHere do i sign up? A serving Master woot woot woot! happy day!


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(in reply to CynthiaWVirginia)
Profile   Post #: 74
RE: Making a memorable weekend - 3/25/2013 8:41:12 AM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Spiritedsub2
Really? The original post talked about previous experiences with previous subs; I didn't get the "blank slate" impression from his OP. Using the craft forum example from your post, people of varying levels of experience with the craft post questions, samples of their work, and answer in detail the question "how did you do that"? That is how I learned most of the techniques I know in that craft, and I pass on what I've learned to those who ask. I definitely don't denigrate or shame the person who joined the forum to learn for asking.
To be honest with you, I don't think you can really compare the two. If you are talking about 'crafts' there are tons of examples here about how somebody made a flogger. A type of leather that you have to work with is a heck of a lot different than a person having a good weekend because, we don't know anything about the person.

Hey, I could have suggested a really good wax scene, but, hmmmmmmm. Do I know if this OP has the background knowledge not to buy some piece of crap beeswax candles off of the shelf and land the chick in the ER? No, I don't.

It's very sweet that folks worry about if people who wander onto this site will "stay" or not. I'm not in that category. Just a few days ago, I researched this and in less than 24 hours on a random day, 250 people from the United States alone joined this site. If they don't stay, it doesn't impact Me and there will be another 250 tomorrow. If they don't hang around, they might actually go out into the local community or <gasp> read a book about kink that's going to give them far more detail than these forums ever will. It's just not something that I do any hand wringing over.



_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to Spiritedsub2)
Profile   Post #: 75
RE: Making a memorable weekend - 3/25/2013 3:00:06 PM   
BitaTruble


Posts: 9779
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: Texas
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LordUberMaster

I'm having a new sub over for a weekend a few weeks from now. It's the first time she'll be here - we've met at her place before - and I want to make it memorable.

Now I'd like some more ideas for what to do this time. It could be things you've done, or not.
The sub in question is moderately experienced, but not a frail newbie. We're both very much into the mental aspects, not just random beatings. I have a tiny flat, no garden and no room for anything that takes much space.

Any thoughts?


Small spaces are no problem. When Himself and I lived in Italy, our first housing was 320 square feet so don't let that deter you from doing something memorable!

My first thought after reading the OP was 'interrogation scene'. It covers the mental aspects you both enjoy, can be done with nothing but a chair, cuffs or rope and a light source. I'd probably send her a text with a 'code' word that she is never to divulge.. then when she gets to your place.. make her divulge it.

How you make her divulge it is up to you

- a plastic squirt gun freezing and a bowl of ice water next to the chair to fill the gun and you can 'shoot' her to your hearts content.

(cold works REALLY well on me during interrogation scenes.. but use what works well on her!)

- After she's tied up in the chair, you can make a show of setting up all kinds of horrible looking paraphenalia (stuff from the kitchen will work.. visual effects of stuff that you would NEVER use on her.. but she ain't gonna know that) .. let her watch you lay it all out then apply that blindfold.



Use your imagination, your knowledge of what you both enjoy and then go out and do that stuff. Have fun!



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Rock, paper, scissors."

He laughed. "You are the wisest woman I know."


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Profile   Post #: 76
RE: Making a memorable weekend - 3/25/2013 4:13:36 PM   
MistressDarkArt


Posts: 5178
Status: offline 		OK, Uber-dude,

Here's a serious answer, bdsm-flavored.

You DID have her fill out a bdsm checklist, didn't you? If she has 3, 4, and 5 rated activities you should have several things to choose from you know she will enjoy.

It is always astounding to me that people start playing without doing this. Checklists give such insight into your potential partner, especially if you ask the questions in person. You can watch their expressions and body language as each item is discussed, and your partner can add qualifiers, explanations and any other information they feel is necessary regarding the activity.

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Profile   Post #: 77
RE: Making a memorable weekend - 3/25/2013 4:16:09 PM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline 		That's a really good suggestion, MDA.

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

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Profile   Post #: 78
RE: Making a memorable weekend - 3/25/2013 4:55:06 PM   
BlkTallFullfig


Posts: 5585
Joined: 6/25/2004
Status: offline 		If it's a joke, why does it matter how anyone replies?
I responded jokingly, because the whole thing seemed to be ridiculous, or someone playing a joke on us. M

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(in reply to Spiritedsub2)
Profile   Post #: 79
RE: Making a memorable weekend - 3/25/2013 6:40:46 PM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressDarkArt

OK, Uber-dude,

Here's a serious answer, bdsm-flavored.

You DID have her fill out a bdsm checklist, didn't you? If she has 3, 4, and 5 rated activities you should have several things to choose from you know she will enjoy.

It is always astounding to me that people start playing without doing this. Checklists give such insight into your potential partner, especially if you ask the questions in person. You can watch their expressions and body language as each item is discussed, and your partner can add qualifiers, explanations and any other information they feel is necessary regarding the activity.


meh....I've never once ever used a checklist. I find them silly personally. I'd rather talk and get to know someone as a person. Once you do that, you both can really get a feel for what you both want and need from the other and communication comes freely and easily. If not, then you may want to think twice about everything.


_____________________________

Nothing has changed
Everything has changed

(in reply to MistressDarkArt)
Profile   Post #: 80
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