Have others noticed that the typical Femdom porn video does NOT portray a typical Femdom interaction (Full Version)

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Cilicia -> Have others noticed that the typical Femdom porn video does NOT portray a typical Femdom interaction (4/2/2013 6:15:12 PM)

I'm intrigued by but inexperienced with Femdom submission - so - to get a better "idea" of what it all entails, I've been dutifully viewing videos found using "femdom video" in the search term.

My observations?

Most are erotically appealing - but - there's something odd about many that I can't quite put my finger on.

My best explanation of the "funny feeling" that I have about them, is that many seem to be porn videos orchestrated by men for men, and therefore, they might not necessarily accurately portray (yes, I know, heaven forbid a porn movie portray the real world accurately) a typical femdom interaction (if anything is typical in porn).

But, before I make that hasty conclusion, may I ask if others have had the same premonition - that most femdom porn videos don't accurately portray what femdom is all (really) about?



Glittoris -> RE: Have others noticed that the typical Femdom porn video does NOT portray a typical Femdom interaction (4/2/2013 6:27:39 PM)

Porn in and of itself is not a good place to start understanding anything in regardless to sex or BDSM [and many other things]. The whole point of it is not to educate people, but to get them off.

Forgot to add, you are pretty much on the money with your assumptions ;)



subinsilicon -> RE: Have others noticed that the typical Femdom porn video does NOT portray a typical Femdom interaction (4/2/2013 6:42:21 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Glittoris
The whole point of it is not to educate people, but to get them off.


That must explain why there are many FemDomme porn videos where the Dominant women focus on the submissive's cock and orgasm.

In real life, I wonder if the focus on the man's orgasm is so constant (notice the video ends when the guy cums, for example).



LadyPact -> RE: Have others noticed that the typical Femdom porn video does NOT portray a typical Femdom interaction (4/2/2013 6:43:27 PM)

Oh, yes. We've noticed. That's also why your average female Dominant can tell when a male submissive and/or bottom has gotten most of his perceptions about BDSM or D/s from watching porn. (By the way, read My sig line.)

If you are interested in seeing just what a lot of the Dommes who have frequented these boards think about that porn, hit the Ask A Mistress search box and type in the word "porn". A lot of us have said the same thing as the conclusion that you are drawing now. It's made by men for men and the folks who produce it know what makes money.



Glittoris -> RE: Have others noticed that the typical Femdom porn video does NOT portray a typical Femdom interaction (4/2/2013 6:44:26 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: subinsilicon


quote:

ORIGINAL: Glittoris
The whole point of it is not to educate people, but to get them off.


That must explain why there are many FemDomme porn videos where the Dominant women focus on the submissive's cock and orgasm.

In real life, I wonder if the focus on the man's orgasm is so constant (notice the video ends when the guy cums, for example).


LOL [sm=crop.gif]



SeekingTrinity -> RE: Have others noticed that the typical Femdom porn video does NOT portray a typical Femdom interaction (4/2/2013 7:28:58 PM)

~FRing it~

If you are basing femdom as a whole on the crap you see in porn, you're doing it wrong.



MistressRage -> RE: Have others noticed that the typical Femdom porn video does NOT portray a typical Femdom interaction (4/2/2013 7:45:35 PM)

FemDom porn accurately portrays real FemDom/male sub interactions about as well as Hollywood movies accurately portray real life America.



subinsilicon -> RE: Have others noticed that the typical Femdom porn video does NOT portray a typical Femdom interaction (4/2/2013 7:46:16 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact
your average female Dominant can tell when a male submissive has gotten most of his perceptions about BDSM or D/s from watching porn.


I, for one, have gotten ALL my perceptions of what it would be like from watching porn.
I wonder if ANY of the videos portray what a real FemDom relationship would be like?

For example, consider the very common theme of a guy strapped to a table with just his cock and scrotum hanging down, and a couple of female Dommes play ping pong with his ever reddening human badmitten set. It takes a professional cabinet makers to make some of those wooden tables and cages.

Likewise, take the very common toiletry theme, where, again, it takes a lot of money (we're talking hundreds of dollars at least) to make the special toilet-bowl chairs. Something smells of a professional outfit making these videos, and not your average Dom woman.





MAINEiacMISTRESS -> RE: Have others noticed that the typical Femdom porn video does NOT portray a typical Femdom interaction (4/2/2013 7:48:00 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Cilicia

I'm intrigued by but inexperienced with Femdom submission - so - to get a better "idea" of what it all entails, I've been dutifully viewing videos found using "femdom video" in the search term.

My observations?

Most are erotically appealing - but - there's something odd about many that I can't quite put my finger on.

My best explanation of the "funny feeling" that I have about them, is that many seem to be porn videos orchestrated by men for men, and therefore, they might not necessarily accurately portray (yes, I know, heaven forbid a porn movie portray the real world accurately) a typical femdom interaction (if anything is typical in porn).

But, before I make that hasty conclusion, may I ask if others have had the same premonition - that most femdom porn videos don't accurately portray what femdom is all (really) about?


Well for one thing, ask yourself this: Do you think a DOMINANT-MINDED Woman is going to put Her energies into pleasuring a MAN, playing with his wankstick? Or, do you think instead "I expect you to serve ME" is what a Dominant Woman would say to him? These are your choices.
*sets timer* Ok, you have 30 seconds to think that one over.

Hint: there is a reason why the CB6000 and similar devices are so pupular.

I wish we could somehow hack into male submissives' computers and figure out a way to give them an electrical shock every time they watch so-called "FemDomme" porn. I interview so many subs who "learned about" Dommes this way, I'm tempted to have that as My first question to them (Did you learn about Female Dominants from porn? _yes __no) and then eliminate them from the competition right off the bat because "ReTraining" them away from the porn train of thought takes time and effort that I could spend with them on other more productive interactions. many of them are permanently hung up on it because that's the FIRST way they learned it, so now it is their "foundation" of thought...and now they question anything that doesn't result in their receiving a "happy ending", because that's what they learned from porn. Idiots.
--MM



Subano -> RE: Have others noticed that the typical Femdom porn video does NOT portray a typical Femdom interaction (4/2/2013 7:59:49 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: MAINEiacMISTRESS
Hint: there is a reason why the CB6000 and similar devices are so pupular.


I was wondering why myself.

So what is the real purpose of the cock cage anyway?

Is it meant to be erotic punishment? Or is it merely a way to get the cock out of the way?




FrostedFlake -> RE: Have others noticed that the typical Femdom porn video does NOT portray a typical Femdom interaction (4/2/2013 8:03:35 PM)

quote:

Pornography (n.)
1843, "ancient obscene painting, especially in temples of Bacchus," from French pornographie, from Greek pornographos "(one) depicting prostitutes," from porne "prostitute," originally "bought, purchased" (with an original notion, probably of "female slave sold for prostitution"), related to pernanai "to sell," from PIE root *per- "to traffic in, to sell" (cf. Latin pretium "price," Lithuanian perku "I buy") + graphein "to write" (see -graphy). A brothel in ancient Greek was a porneion.

In reference to modern works by 1859 (originally French novels), later as a charge against native literature; sense of "obscene pictures" in modern times is from 1906. Also sometimes used late 19c. for "description of prostitutes" as a matter of public hygiene. The "Medical Archives" in 1873 proposed porniatria for "the lengthy and really meaningless expression 'social evil hospital' ...."

quote:

I shall not today attempt further to define the kinds of material I understand to be embraced within that shorthand description [hard-core pornography]; and perhaps I could never succeed in intelligibly doing so. But I know it when I see it, and the motion picture involved in this case is not that.
[U.S. Supreme Court Justice Potter Stewart, concurring opinion, "Jacobellis v. Ohio," 1964]


In ancient contexts, often paired with rhypography, "genre painting of low, sordid, or unsuitable subjects." Pornocracy (1860) is "the dominating influence of harlots," used specifically of the government of Rome during the first half of the 10th century by Theodora and her daughters. Pornotopia (1966) was coined to describe the ideal erotic-world of pornographic movies.


It turns out, porn has little or nothing to do with the way things work in real life.

Except, perhaps, yours.



Akrotiri -> RE: Have others noticed that the typical Femdom porn video does NOT portray a typical Femdom interaction (4/2/2013 8:07:52 PM)

quote:

It turns out, porn has little or nothing to do with the way things work in real life.


[ wank fodder alert ]
I'm curious.

Is there a single movie that I can watch that DOES accurately portray what femdom is about for you?

Or do absolutely no videos accurately portray what femdom is all about for you?

[ / wank fodder alert ]



MAINEiacMISTRESS -> RE: Have others noticed that the typical Femdom porn video does NOT portray a typical Femdom interaction (4/2/2013 8:17:03 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: subinsilicon


quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact
your average female Dominant can tell when a male submissive has gotten most of his perceptions about BDSM or D/s from watching porn.


I, for one, have gotten ALL my perceptions of what it would be like from watching porn.
I wonder if ANY of the videos portray what a real FemDom relationship would be like?

For example, consider the very common theme of a guy strapped to a table with just his cock and scrotum hanging down, and a couple of female Dommes play ping pong with his ever reddening human badmitten set. It takes a professional cabinet makers to make some of those wooden tables and cages.

Likewise, take the very common toiletry theme, where, again, it takes a lot of money (we're talking hundreds of dollars at least) to make the special toilet-bowl chairs. Something smells of a professional outfit making these videos, and not your average Dom woman.



*rolls eyes*
Dominant women are all around you. We are your co-workers, doctors, accountants, teachers, relatives, friends, the owner of that cute little family store over on Main Street (*waves*). Although some Dominants might own a select piece of BDSM furniture, We don't usually own dungeons (that's just for the pro's and very active kinksters who can afford to convert an entire room of their home). What separates us from the non-Dominant women is WE DON'T TAKE YOUR BULLSHIT, WE ENJOY BEING IN CHARGE, and WE ARE WILLING TO *MAKE* IT HAPPEN (hopefully being mindful of the Consent issue).
A person doesn't need to be a Sadist with a torture device to be a Dominant, some simply enjoy holding Power over others, or Managing them benevelently...just as submissives enjoy different levels of being Controlled.
To LadyPact's comment, yes We can usually tell when you boys have learned from porn after conversing with you awhile, especially when you ask, "So, are You wearing a corset and thigh high boots right now?" ...No, dumbass. I'm wearing a blazer and dress slacks...some FemDommes wear a blouse and jeans when interacting with a sub...some FemDommes like to wear a tank top and yoga pants...or any of the above depending on what time of day it is.
--MM



BlkTallFullfig -> RE: Have others noticed that the typical Femdom porn video does NOT portray a typical Femdom interaction (4/2/2013 8:39:44 PM)

quote:

A person doesn't need to be a Sadist with a torture device to be a Dominant, some simply enjoy holding Power over others, or Managing them benevelently...just as submissives enjoy different levels of being Controlled.
This pretty much describes my brand of fem domme.
There are actually some fem domme videos that might resemble some dominas, and their submissives, but I forgot the name of the female producer.
Maybe Ron will come by, and remind me. M

Editted to Add what I found from previous discussions on this: FemDomsociety.co.uk, Some of the OWK are interesting for their pure FemmeDomme sadistic aspects, http://www.bleuproductions.com/ladies.html, Sandra Romain in the men in pain videos, An interesting film is "Maitresse" starring Gerard Depardieu. It does a good job of seeing the conflict a vanilla man has with his Dominant girlfriend, and www.godomina.com, and these are all I can find as parts of past discussions. I'll look more for a couple of names I was told were reliable, and faily good at portraying female domination, of a male slave/submissive.




LadyPact -> RE: Have others noticed that the typical Femdom porn video does NOT portray a typical Femdom interaction (4/2/2013 8:40:42 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: subinsilicon
I, for one, have gotten ALL my perceptions of what it would be like from watching porn.


And how is that working out for you? Having much success with the real life version? If not, would you like three guesses as to why that might be?


quote:

I wonder if ANY of the videos portray what a real FemDom relationship would be like?
Part of what gets porn to sell is the fantasy aspect. The thing is, in a female led relationship, the focus isn't riveted on a guy getting off. However, that makes for lousy porn, which leads to lousy sales.


quote:

For example, consider the very common theme of a guy strapped to a table with just his cock and scrotum hanging down, and a couple of female Dommes play ping pong with his ever reddening human badmitten set. It takes a professional cabinet makers to make some of those wooden tables and cages.

Knowing how good kinky people are at making dungeon furniture, that's not the difficult part of believe. Rather, it's the infrequency where two Dominant women are playing with one male at the same time for CBT. You see the two female top thing more often when one is teaching the other technique, which also makes for bad porn because it's more educational.






AAkasha -> RE: Have others noticed that the typical Femdom porn video does NOT portray a typical Femdom interaction (4/2/2013 9:02:15 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Akrotiri

quote:

It turns out, porn has little or nothing to do with the way things work in real life.


[ wank fodder alert ]
I'm curious.

Is there a single movie that I can watch that DOES accurately portray what femdom is about for you?

Or do absolutely no videos accurately portray what femdom is all about for you?

[ / wank fodder alert ]



There is a movie called "Punish Me" (you can get it on Amazon) that doesn't necessarily portray a RELATIONSHIP of femdom that mimics mine, but some of the sensuality/style of some of the BDSM interactions are more close to mine than any het femdom porn you will find.

Here's a clip:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jc_XJsMwx2s

Akasha



absolutchocolat -> RE: Have others noticed that the typical Femdom porn video does NOT portray a typical Femdom interaction (4/2/2013 9:15:19 PM)

FR

Well, a lot of us on this side play with real, live female Dominants (or we are femDommes), so why look at shitty porn when you can get the real thing? It's like being hungry and turning the TV on to watch Rachael Ray instead of cooking food!



MAINEiacMISTRESS -> RE: Have others noticed that the typical Femdom porn video does NOT portray a typical Femdom interaction (4/2/2013 9:16:39 PM)

quote:

original: Subano

quote:

ORIGINAL: MAINEiacMISTRESS
Hint: there is a reason why the CB6000 and similar devices are so pupular.

I was wondering why myself.

So what is the real purpose of the cock cage anyway?

Is it meant to be erotic punishment? Or is it merely a way to get the cock out of the way?


It all depends on what the Dominant's intention is. Many, as in My case, use the cage as a way of improving a male sub's Focus (so he cannot wank off without permission, and making his erections painful so he has to try hard to NOT get aroused...learning NOT to). Once the option of masturbation is removed, their mind focusses on the needs of his Domme and turns to more productive NON-SEXUAL things.
Some Dommes simply enjoy the sound of their sub begging to be let out.



quote:

ORIGINAL: Akrotiri

quote:

It turns out, porn has little or nothing to do with the way things work in real life.


[ wank fodder alert ]
I'm curious.

Is there a single movie that I can watch that DOES accurately portray what femdom is about for you?

Or do absolutely no videos accurately portray what femdom is all about for you?

[ / wank fodder alert ]

Actually, I've run across many "vanilla" films featuring pretty accurate FemDomme lifestyle (Female-led relationships, with or without evidence of "kink"), but for the life of Me none of them come to mind this late at night. If you truly want to understand it, think of the traditional "husband-led" households, and simply put the woman at the head of the household instead. (Now you'll see why porn is WAAAAY off the mark!)

I'm going to try to send a link to a funny music video (just for entertainment purposes, not education). It isn't really depicting accurate "lifestyle" FemDomme at all (maybe a Play session) but it's more realistic than the "happy" outcomes of porn, and I get a chuckle out of the male slaves' ill-fitting costumes and Her priceless pissed off look. To get the full meaning you need to listen carefully to what She's singing.
My favorite line, after She's listed off all the nasty chores She wants him to do: "....and then you'll...GOOOO TOOO YOUR ROOOOOOOOM!"
Hahah boys, there's your "happy ending"!
"Task Mistress" http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iQt6WWR5B6k

--MM



Pyramus -> RE: Have others noticed that the typical Femdom porn video does NOT portray a typical Femdom interaction (4/2/2013 10:38:02 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: AAkasha

Here's a clip:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jc_XJsMwx2s


Darn. I watched that clip, and, well, I'm not into the asphyxiation aspect, but the damn thing stopped just when it started to get good!

Googling for "femdom" & "punish me", I ended up with these - which - I must say, are more to "MY" liking as to what "I'd" want "MY" femdom to be: :)

1. This is truly sadistic Femdom!
http://xhamster.com/movies/1565405/incredible_femdom_handjob_double_cum.html
2. This is probably classic Femdom wank fodder:
http://xhamster.com/movies/136523/femdom.html
3. And, most instructive of all, here's a 30-minute so-called "Femdom Compilation" which shows the porn industry's idea of Femdomming:
http://www.xvideos.com/video1499650/femdom_compilation_handjob_master



JeffBC -> RE: Have others noticed that the typical Femdom porn video does NOT portray a typical Femdom interaction (4/2/2013 10:46:58 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Pyramus
1. This is truly sadistic Femdom!
http://xhamster.com/movies/1565405/incredible_femdom_handjob_double_cum.html

OK, so I randomly just clicked the first link and what I see is a hot young woman kneeling in front of a guy serving him.... or at least pleasuring him.

Man, I think I missed my calling as a male sub.



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