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RE: Dominant women don't do that - 4/18/2013 5:57:09 PM

HarryVanWinkle

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<<< Has even been known to do windows. But, I did have to download the owner's manual to figure out how to use a Dyson vacuum cleaner.

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RE: Dominant women don't do that - 4/18/2013 7:05:22 PM

NiceButMeanGirl

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I think Dysons are over-priced kinda. But that shows initiative, a good thing.

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RE: Dominant women don't do that - 4/19/2013 1:46:17 AM

Dreamless

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Pretty sure that, as a dominant woman, if Iiiiiii want to cook, then I damn well can and you can bite me instead of the food but, really now, if I get my rocks off knowing you enjoyed a well presented meal cooked by moi, that may or may not have been poisoned or laced with aphrodisiacs... I'm just saying. I think I'm well within my rights to like doing whatever I so happen to please.

Man, I don't care if people assume I must be submissive because I like well fed, happy guests! Any statement that starts with "Dominant women don't do x" or "women don't do x" or "you can't do x" is inevitably going to cheese me off a little.

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RE: Dominant women don't do that - 4/19/2013 5:09:21 AM

Charade

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I like to do my housework naked. I am obviously submissive.

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RE: Dominant women don't do that - 4/19/2013 5:23:33 AM

LaTigresse

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I have to admit that I am pretty much over talking to anyone that equates actions as being either dominant or submissive.

Some see the very act of working for a person, or company, as submitting. I can't imagine how difficult that must make their lives, at times.

We've had dozens of threads about the 'dominance' or 'submissiveness' of certain sexual acts. It's ridiculous.

I do what I do, as I feel the need, or desire. If that makes me less than dominant in the eyes of random idiots it really isn't an issue to me. I just do not care.

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RE: Dominant women don't do that - 4/19/2013 5:33:16 PM

LookieNoNookie

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

This is a spin off from a thread on the General board. One of the thoughts that came from that thread was about how a certain Dominant woman must have really been submissive. She did certain things or acted in a certain way, yadda, yadda.

I tend to think that some of this 'she's not Dominant' bit comes from some people believing in the concept of Dominant acts and submissive acts. Personally, I think that's a lot of bunk. Dominant women tend to be well rounded creatures and frankly, if somebody told Me that I was doing something and I "seemed submissive" I'd probably turn around and say that I have the authority to do what I please.

With this in mind, and in the spirit of breaking stereotypes, I thought it might be fun to share some of the things that we, as Dominant women, do that if somebody saw that snapshot, might be considered a 'submissive' thing. I'll start with the first one that came to My head.

I am a kick ass host. When people attend parties here at Leather and Lace, they know that they are going to find every comfort that I can provide. While I don't have the skills to prepare gourmet food, guests know that they will find a variety of dishes on the menu. If they have been here before and ask for a certain dish to be made again, it's going to be here when we hold the next dungeon party. Before menu planning, I check to ensure that I am prepared with a vegan dish if necessary and make sure there is at least one sugar free snack if there is a diabetic on the guest list. I keep track of everyone's soft drink and coffee preferences and ensure those are available. If we have overnight guests, I prepare breakfast in the morning and people get their eggs in the way that they prefer.

Sounds really service-y, doesn't it?

Who's next?

I think you just fucked with my hayud.

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RE: Dominant women don't do that - 4/19/2013 6:24:54 PM

njlauren

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I knew a married couple that had a D/s (Fem D, male s), where the domme was a very tall, strong woman (stunning doesn't cut it). In any event, she loved turning her s on, she loved teasing him, and they had a wonderful sex life besides kink play, and they enjoyed pleasing one another...I remember at a symposium they described how they lived, and she said something like when her H was sick, she really loved nursing him back to health, and there were some who were like that wasn't what a domme would do, etc.......I loved her, she had a wicked laugh, and she looked at the person who said that (she towered over the person who said it, was some short guy who fancied himself a dom), laughed, and basically said something like "listen, shorty, I love my sub, he is my soulmate and my love, and whether I am beating the crap out of him, teasing him, or taking care of him, I am the domme and he is my sub, and if you don't like it go play handball against a curb someplace". Might have been a wee bit cruel to call him on his size (she was 6', and loved 5" heels), but he was such a jerk he deserved it.

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RE: Dominant women don't do that - 4/19/2013 7:09:09 PM

HarryVanWinkle

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quote:

ORIGINAL: NiceButMeanGirl

I think Dysons are over-priced kinda. But that shows initiative, a good thing.

NBMG

Or it shows that I am NOT a rocket scientist. I couldn't figure the damned machine out without downloading the manual.

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RE: Dominant women don't do that - 4/19/2013 7:14:17 PM

NiceButMeanGirl

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lol

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RE: Dominant women don't do that - 4/20/2013 4:53:27 AM

MissImmortalPain

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fr

I could give you a list a mile long of things I do all the time that aren't very "dominant" (or so some people have told me) I love taking care of babies, have never met one that didn't like me. I spend a great deal of time with teens and people in their early twenties. Mostly playing board games that I don't care if I lose. I'm a pretty casual person and don't love many things on the planet more than my puppy. OMG, I even cry from time to time<that has got me called non domme before. If you want the one that would most likely get me kicked out of the big mean girls club....the last time I spent the night at the new boys place I got up and made him breakfast before he went to work. I even stood(on one foot mind you) in his kicthen and did his dishes. He said if I hadn't been wearing a black teddy and a bunch of spiked jewlery he would have thought I was sub.

And on a pervy side note...I love to suck dick. Why do some men think that is a submissive action?

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RE: Dominant women don't do that - 4/20/2013 5:07:20 AM

tomguy

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People worried about stereo types and their dire need for disproving them to arbitrary amounts of people usually fit the bill. Do by doing. And get me a sandwich! :)..

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RE: Dominant women don't do that - 4/21/2013 4:04:58 AM

Rasnow

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I thought I was a 5'10 domme who liked to cook for people, and now I don't know what I am anymore...

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RE: Dominant women don't do that - 4/21/2013 9:11:51 AM

RumpusParable

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A classic: Giving oral sex.

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RE: Dominant women don't do that - 4/21/2013 12:42:01 PM

ladysekhmetka

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I tend to avert my gaze in public a bunch and some people have assumed that I'm more of a subby switch than a domme switch because of this.

It's more accurate to say that I do it because I'm pretty antisocial and I have found that looking at people in the face invites them to talk with me. I save my non-paid social interaction time for my spouse, friends, cashiers, waitresses, people in my house and a few select hangout spots.

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RE: Dominant women don't do that - 4/24/2013 4:47:14 AM

FilmWithMistrix

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Baroana

I, as a dominant woman, NEVER give birth. Lying there with my legs spread while a watermelon sized person who might even be MALE tunnels through my vagina??? How much more humiliating and masochistic can it get???

quote:

t)

Best quote ever.

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RE: Dominant women don't do that - 4/25/2013 3:35:04 PM

seekingOwnertoo

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

I thought it might be fun to share some of the things that we, as Dominant women, do that if somebody saw that snapshot, might be considered a 'submissive' thing. I'll start with the first one that came to My head

WEG

i cannot share the information i know about Dominant Ladies ... doing something that might be considered ... submissive. Ya know ... it's the gentleman thing ...

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RE: Dominant women don't do that - 4/25/2013 4:48:33 PM

MAINEiacMISTRESS

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quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

I think it's fine that a shorter dominant woman goes around making breakfast for people, LP. It's just not at all appropriate for a femdom who's, say, over 5' 10".

I hope that helps.

I'm only 5'2, and I *HATE* cooking and cleaning, so in other words it doesn't get done by Me very often. Whenever I do anything "domestic" it involves destructive violence and angry energy (things get broken and tossed). *Drags PeonForHer over backwards, chokes him unconscious, props him up on his knees and uses his upturned ass as a stepstool so I can reach My coffee on the top shelf of the cupboard*

Oops...I think I just did something "submissive": I built a piece of furniture!!! *kicks PeonForHer to wake him up*
OK, I'm done with you Peon, now get the FUCK out of My kitchen. (I love the stunned look on a tall man's face when he realizes I've just taken him down using only TWO FINGERS hooked under his chin)

Now, where was I? Oh yes...LP, I don't consider party planning an act of submission. In fact I'd consider it another form of Domination since you obviously totally DOMINATE the place, making sure everything is PERFECT...that's more the sign of a control freak (in a good way), DIRECTING the flow of the evening, rather than waiting for someone else to direct YOU. Sounds like an awesome time too.

*Disclaimer: I once washed some clothes and found a dinner plate in the washing machine after the wash cycle was finished. Would that be considered "Multitasking"?

--MM

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RE: Dominant women don't do that - 4/30/2013 2:31:36 AM

FilmWithMistrix

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I prefer to cook, but I am a world traveled gourmand with a cookbook near ready to publish... my current toy has asked me to teach him to cook... and I am making an effort when we see each other to do that for him, but I expect I'll continue to take over the kitchen regardless.

Dishes? With my nails? Hell no... thats boys work... as is mopping & laundry... bathroom cleaning? let them scrub the grout.. I did the damn tile work.Painting, staining/polying floors, cement work/tuckpointing my brick home... all stuff I insist on doing myself. Sanding the floors, fuck that, boys can push sanders.

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RE: Dominant women don't do that - 5/2/2013 9:51:36 PM

Delilya

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I get it all the time because I am a hippie. For some reason people think the two can't go hand in hand.

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RE: Dominant women don't do that - 5/3/2013 1:44:20 PM

MadamAsianDom

Posts: 153
Joined: 5/28/2011
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

This is a spin off from a thread on the General board. One of the thoughts that came from that thread was about how a certain Dominant woman must have really been submissive. She did certain things or acted in a certain way, yadda, yadda.

I tend to think that some of this 'she's not Dominant' bit comes from some people believing in the concept of Dominant acts and submissive acts. Personally, I think that's a lot of bunk. Dominant women tend to be well rounded creatures and frankly, if somebody told Me that I was doing something and I "seemed submissive" I'd probably turn around and say that I have the authority to do what I please.

With this in mind, and in the spirit of breaking stereotypes, I thought it might be fun to share some of the things that we, as Dominant women, do that if somebody saw that snapshot, might be considered a 'submissive' thing. I'll start with the first one that came to My head.

I am a kick ass host. When people attend parties here at Leather and Lace, they know that they are going to find every comfort that I can provide. While I don't have the skills to prepare gourmet food, guests know that they will find a variety of dishes on the menu. If they have been here before and ask for a certain dish to be made again, it's going to be here when we hold the next dungeon party. Before menu planning, I check to ensure that I am prepared with a vegan dish if necessary and make sure there is at least one sugar free snack if there is a diabetic on the guest list. I keep track of everyone's soft drink and coffee preferences and ensure those are available. If we have overnight guests, I prepare breakfast in the morning and people get their eggs in the way that they prefer.

Sounds really service-y, doesn't it?

Who's next?

There isn't anything I'm doing that's submissive because I'm the one doing it. That may sound rather arrogant, but anyone who knows me would tell you that about me. And hell, I am arrogant. Why deny it?

I've always thought that "Dominants don't do that." "Dominants don't wear that." was all a bunch of bullshit. One of my leather sisters, and I were having a discussion about that one time. She said she used to have an anklet with bells on it that she wore, and someone told her that only slaves wore bells around their ankle. I was incredulous that someone had the nerve to criticize what jewelry she was wearing. It gave her pleasure. What business was it of theirs?

I have very specific ways I want things done, regardless of what it is we're talking about. I wear what I like, when I like. The only people who have the authority to give me orders are the NCO's and Officers appointed over me for the remainder of the time I'm serving in the military.

< Message edited by MadamAsianDom -- 5/3/2013 1:45:32 PM >

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