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RE: -=idiots, non consensual torture & FetLife=- - 4/30/2013 4:34:26 AM   
subbiedude


Posts: 50
Joined: 11/7/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ResidentSadist

So I get this letter on Fet:

I am a mistress from India, New to BDSM.

I have a servant, who is completely dependent on me in terms of Food, Living and work. He is unaware about BDSM but i dont care.

Since he is dependent and week, i wanna torture him and he has no other option than bearing the pain.

Looking for some one who could help me torture him.

Would you be interested to help me?

I wrote back saying:

Would I participate in non consensual torture? No. . . you're a fucking idiot.

Occasionally your see this kind of abuse in the name of BDSM, especially in Yahoo groups. Often it isn't real, but one time they really did have some mail order bride trapped in a cage for several months.

Anyway, I looked for a "report spam" button and could find none. I really don't think much of that piece of shit software they run Fetlife on but seriously, is there no way to report spam or someone soliciting illegal activities on Fet?



Whoaa I am from india too, Would love to know who is this so called mistress, because in here finding a mistress is like finding a water on mars. Anyway i wont blame that mistress because the BDSM scene here is not that established. Its still a conservative society & hence this mistress who sent you the message may be just fantasizing (Thats just a guess), moreover i would have been happier if you had told her that its inappropriate to force someone to BDSM while subs like me are craving to submit :-).

May be she was a sadist or a psycho, who knows, but definitely an opportunity is missed lol

Next time someone asks you this type of question please dont try to report them as spam, instead enlighten them consequences of non consensual BDSM play, if they are still dumb enough to pursue it, let them face the consequences, because by reporting their profile or banning them from forum will not stop them from pursuing their fantasy.

(in reply to ResidentSadist)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: -=idiots, non consensual torture & FetLife=- - 4/30/2013 4:37:28 AM   
LafayetteLady


Posts: 7683
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Northern New Jersey
Status: offline 		Well, I'm not interested in local events, so that function serves no purpose for me. I'm not really all that interested in the dating aspect on the other side here either at this time. I mainly come for the forums. I don't want to have to think of a subject and then look for a group that fits. I like coming here, scrolling through the categories and finding a topic that is interesting.


(in reply to DomZathrus)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: -=idiots, non consensual torture & FetLife=- - 4/30/2013 6:41:41 AM   
LizDeluxe


Posts: 687
Joined: 10/2/2011
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ResidentSadist
I wrote back saying:
Would I participate in non consensual torture? No. . . you're a fucking idiot.


As opposed to the consensual type?

(in reply to ResidentSadist)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: -=idiots, non consensual torture & FetLife=- - 4/30/2013 7:03:45 AM   
Thaz


Posts: 617
Joined: 4/28/2012
Status: offline 		Fl is a social network. Its great for keeping track of my local scene and so on.

I prefer here for discussion.

Its about 50/50 for finding play partners. Actually that's a lie. Every play partner I've had this year started here, met, introduced to FL and the local scene and THEN played.


I'd agree. The Indian Domme is probably some kid in their basement in Arkensaw

(in reply to LizDeluxe)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: -=idiots, non consensual torture & FetLife=- - 4/30/2013 9:53:51 AM   
MasterCaneman


Posts: 3842
Joined: 3/21/2013
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: subbiedude


quote:

ORIGINAL: ResidentSadist

So I get this letter on Fet:

I am a mistress from India, New to BDSM.

I have a servant, who is completely dependent on me in terms of Food, Living and work. He is unaware about BDSM but i dont care.

Since he is dependent and week, i wanna torture him and he has no other option than bearing the pain.

Looking for some one who could help me torture him.

Would you be interested to help me?

I wrote back saying:

Would I participate in non consensual torture? No. . . you're a fucking idiot.

Occasionally your see this kind of abuse in the name of BDSM, especially in Yahoo groups. Often it isn't real, but one time they really did have some mail order bride trapped in a cage for several months.

Anyway, I looked for a "report spam" button and could find none. I really don't think much of that piece of shit software they run Fetlife on but seriously, is there no way to report spam or someone soliciting illegal activities on Fet?



Whoaa I am from india too, Would love to know who is this so called mistress, because in here finding a mistress is like finding a water on mars. Anyway i wont blame that mistress because the BDSM scene here is not that established. Its still a conservative society & hence this mistress who sent you the message may be just fantasizing (Thats just a guess), moreover i would have been happier if you had told her that its inappropriate to force someone to BDSM while subs like me are craving to submit :-).

May be she was a sadist or a psycho, who knows, but definitely an opportunity is missed lol

Next time someone asks you this type of question please dont try to report them as spam, instead enlighten them consequences of non consensual BDSM play, if they are still dumb enough to pursue it, let them face the consequences, because by reporting their profile or banning them from forum will not stop them from pursuing their fantasy.


subbiedude, you really need to read the other responses to this post. The sender was in all likelihood some Eastern European scammer trolling for desperate men with the sole intention of separating them from their money. It's probably pointless now, as I'm guessing you've already hit "her" profile and are well on your way to getting ripped off.

I'm not flaming you on this, but before you go off half-cocked, do some research on this side before you jump into something. It was the main reason I joined CM in the first place, to be honest.

_____________________________

Age and treachery will always overcome youth and ambition.

The supreme art of war is to subdue the enemy without fighting. ~ Sun Tzu

Goddess Wrangler



(in reply to subbiedude)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: -=idiots, non consensual torture & FetLife=- - 4/30/2013 12:03:34 PM   
SpyUnderCover


Posts: 208
Joined: 6/21/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MarineKitten

Wow, I must be smarter then the average bear or something, FetLife is a breeze for me to figure out. Also lets keep in mind it is a social networking site, not a meat market like CM. The dark background makes for more comfortable reading. Stark white backgrounds over time are rather blinding, at least to my eyes they are.


To each one's own, but to me FetLife seems like much more of a meat market than CM does. The pictures that many people post there make me want to cringe and say, "Really? You thought it was appropriate to put THAT on a public site?" I know some of that happens on CM, but my impression of Fet is that it's much more extreme.

I also find the dark background trying on my eyes.

Spy

(in reply to MarineKitten)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: -=idiots, non consensual torture & FetLife=- - 4/30/2013 12:07:36 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Thaz
Fl is a social network. Its great for keeping track of my local scene and so on.

I prefer here for discussion.

Its about 50/50 for finding play partners. Actually that's a lie. Every play partner I've had this year started here, met, introduced to FL and the local scene and THEN played.


I'd agree. The Indian Domme is probably some kid in their basement in Arkensaw
Oddly enough, I am completely the other way around when it comes to the difference between the play partner thing between the sites. It's very much because of FL being a social network that I end up becoming acquainted with play partners there. We're going to the same play spaces and know the same people. We're going to the same events. That breeds greater opportunity.



_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to Thaz)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: -=idiots, non consensual torture & FetLife=- - 4/30/2013 1:11:50 PM   
Kana


Posts: 6676
Joined: 10/24/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LizDeluxe

quote:

ORIGINAL: ResidentSadist
I wrote back saying:
Would I participate in non consensual torture? No. . . you're a fucking idiot.


As opposed to the consensual type?

I'm betting 100 billion zillion kongbucks that RS would be down with consensual torture. That's a sucker wager there. He is, after all, the Resident Sadist

_____________________________

"One of God's own prototypes. A high-powered mutant of some kind never even considered for mass production. Too weird to live, and too rare to die. "
HST

(in reply to LizDeluxe)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: -=idiots, non consensual torture & FetLife=- - 4/30/2013 3:34:52 PM   
CynthiaWVirginia


Posts: 1915
Joined: 2/28/2010
From: West Virginia, USA
Status: offline
quote:

Whoaa I am from india too, Would love to know who is this so called mistress, because in here finding a mistress is like finding a water on mars. Anyway i wont blame that mistress because the BDSM scene here is not that established. Its still a conservative society & hence this mistress who sent you the message may be just fantasizing (Thats just a guess), moreover i would have been happier if you had told her that its inappropriate to force someone to BDSM while subs like me are craving to submit :-).

May be she was a sadist or a psycho, who knows, but definitely an opportunity is missed lol

Next time someone asks you this type of question please dont try to report them as spam, instead enlighten them consequences of non consensual BDSM play, if they are still dumb enough to pursue it, let them face the consequences, because by reporting their profile or banning them from forum will not stop them from pursuing their fantasy.


I had forgotten how much fantasy can come into it, especially in cultures very different from my own.

(in reply to subbiedude)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: -=idiots, non consensual torture & FetLife=- - 4/30/2013 4:50:44 PM   
Delilya


Posts: 4108
Joined: 2/2/2011
Status: offline 		I have met more people through the local groups on FetLife than I have here. For me it is a good place to keep up with what is going in my community. Then again I am interested in attending events, demo's and munches, so that may make a difference.

_____________________________

“Love me without fear, trust me without questioning, need me without demanding, want me without restrictions, accept me without changes, desire me without inhibitions"-Dick Sutphen

(in reply to CynthiaWVirginia)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: -=idiots, non consensual torture & FetLife=- - 4/30/2013 4:56:23 PM   
Lucylastic


Posts: 40310
Status: offline 		Yep I come here for the forums, I use fet to keep in contact with other friends, events and people Ive met thru them(especially down in WV/DC/MD/VA)

_____________________________

(•_•)
<) )╯SUCH
/ \

\(•_•)
( (> A NASTY
/ \

(•_•)
<) )> WOMAN
/ \

Duchess Of Dissent
Dont Hate Love

(in reply to Delilya)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: -=idiots, non consensual torture & FetLife=- - 4/30/2013 9:32:39 PM   
absolutchocolat


Posts: 1392
Status: offline 		FR

I always wonder why idiots post information pertaining to illegal activities online. Shit like that can be traced. Plus, who wants to torture someone against their will? Consent is sexy.

(in reply to Lucylastic)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: -=idiots, non consensual torture & FetLife=- - 4/30/2013 10:22:12 PM   
NuevaVida


Posts: 6707
Joined: 8/5/2008
Status: offline


quote:

ORIGINAL: MarineKitten

Wow, I must be smarter then the average bear or something, FetLife is a breeze for me to figure out. Also lets keep in mind it is a social networking site, not a meat market like CM. The dark background makes for more comfortable reading. Stark white backgrounds over time are rather blinding, at least to my eyes they are.

I never had an issue with Fet, either, regarding the layout and the white font on black.

Although, I admit I haven't been on Fet in months. I pulled back on both sites for a few months and when I came back here I just didn't have the inclination to go back there (yet?). I didn't social-network too much there and while I liked a lot of the posters of some of the groups I went to, I feel more of an "at home" feeling on these boards.


_____________________________

Live Simply. Love Generously. Care Deeply. Speak Kindly.



(in reply to SpyUnderCover)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: -=idiots, non consensual torture & FetLife=- - 4/30/2013 10:31:34 PM   
NiceButMeanGirl


Posts: 2756
Joined: 11/4/2011
From: Bellingham, WA U.S.A.
Status: offline 		Actually, I like both CM and FL. CM is easier to search on for people & FL is easier to search on for events. Even so, I've met way more people in my local area through going to the local events I've found on FL than I've ever met through CM. The forums and groups are set up differently on each and that makes more variety and, for me anyway, it's all fun and interesting. I do have to say, though, I have seen waaaaaay more blatantly in-your-face cocks & pussies & assholes on FL than I ever have on CM. FL is also really easy for me to navigate. I can't say the colors on FL really bother me that much. If I had to pick the colors on one or the other that bother me more, it would be CM's, but yet I keep coming back. lol

NBMG

< Message edited by NiceButMeanGirl -- 4/30/2013 10:32:27 PM >

_____________________________

I'm now SweetlySadistic1 on CollarSpace. NBMG is an old profile, please see my new one.


(in reply to absolutchocolat)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: -=idiots, non consensual torture & FetLife=- - 5/1/2013 12:33:26 AM   
ResidentSadist


Posts: 12580
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SoulAlloy

on fetlife

There is nothing on the email page. What am I supposed to do, look them up and report their profile for something that happened in email?

_____________________________

-=BDSM Book List=- Reading is Fundamental !!!
I give good thread.

(in reply to SoulAlloy)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: -=idiots, non consensual torture & FetLife=- - 5/1/2013 12:40:53 AM   
ResidentSadist


Posts: 12580
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Kana


quote:

ORIGINAL: LizDeluxe

quote:

ORIGINAL: ResidentSadist
I wrote back saying:
Would I participate in non consensual torture? No. . . you're a fucking idiot.


As opposed to the consensual type?

I'm betting 100 billion zillion kongbucks that RS would be down with consensual torture. That's a sucker wager there. He is, after all, the Resident Sadist

You got that right . . . I don't do that fluffy flogger florentine cheerleader pompom type of shit that submissives compare to "getting a nice massage"! It's a whip, it's supposed to hurt. And what would you call whipping, cutting, piercing, fear, sacrifice, degradation . . . is that not torture?

_____________________________

-=BDSM Book List=- Reading is Fundamental !!!
I give good thread.

(in reply to Kana)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: -=idiots, non consensual torture & FetLife=- - 5/1/2013 12:45:42 AM   
ResidentSadist


Posts: 12580
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
Status: offline 		And back to the point... FetLife has it's nice social network aspects but the software is hand written and it is a piece of shit. The menu system sucks and seriously, no one has been able to tell me how to report an email . . . you can't can you?

As far as the asshole that wrote me, I go with the CM mindset in that the blacklist is bullshit. Let the mods handle it. And if management at Fetlife doesn't want to moderate their email spam, fuck'em and that piece of crap software (Ruby on Rails) they run that site on.

< Message edited by ResidentSadist -- 5/1/2013 12:49:28 AM >

_____________________________

-=BDSM Book List=- Reading is Fundamental !!!
I give good thread.

(in reply to ResidentSadist)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: -=idiots, non consensual torture & FetLife=- - 5/1/2013 12:59:47 AM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: NiceButMeanGirl

Actually, I like both CM and FL. CM is easier to search on for people & FL is easier to search on for events. Even so, I've met way more people in my local area through going to the local events I've found on FL than I've ever met through CM. The forums and groups are set up differently on each and that makes more variety and, for me anyway, it's all fun and interesting. I do have to say, though, I have seen waaaaaay more blatantly in-your-face cocks & pussies & assholes on FL than I ever have on CM. FL is also really easy for me to navigate. I can't say the colors on FL really bother me that much. If I had to pick the colors on one or the other that bother me more, it would be CM's, but yet I keep coming back. lol

NBMG

Really? Because I'm the opposite about the background/colors.

The pics? We're in total agreement. I'm really not big on that and it's part of the reason of why I stick around CM.

I joined this site when we lived in GA. When we moved from GA to CA (about four years ago) there were still enough people active on the CM forums to meet (semi) local kinksters. We were at a house party before we were even unpacked.

The most recent move (CA to AK) it most certainly didn't work that way. I had to use Fet based on the location. Thankfully, the people I contacted before arrival were able to give the information that I needed. In the past couple of years, a couple of them have become really good friends.

In a year, we'll move again. I'll most likely rely on Fet to put feelers out. I wasn't on the net when I lived in the city where I got the first kink exposure. I wasn't "LP" back then. It's going to be something of a neat adventure.


_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to NiceButMeanGirl)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: -=idiots, non consensual torture & FetLife=- - 5/1/2013 2:18:21 AM   
egern


Posts: 537
Joined: 1/11/2013
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ResidentSadist

So I get this letter on Fet:

I am a mistress from India, New to BDSM.

I have a servant, who is completely dependent on me in terms of Food, Living and work. He is unaware about BDSM but i dont care.

Since he is dependent and week, i wanna torture him and he has no other option than bearing the pain.

Looking for some one who could help me torture him.

Would you be interested to help me?

I wrote back saying:

Would I participate in non consensual torture? No. . . you're a fucking idiot.

Occasionally your see this kind of abuse in the name of BDSM, especially in Yahoo groups. Often it isn't real, but one time they really did have some mail order bride trapped in a cage for several months.

Anyway, I looked for a "report spam" button and could find none. I really don't think much of that piece of shit software they run Fetlife on but seriously, is there no way to report spam or someone soliciting illegal activities on Fet?



I do not know - is there one here??

(in reply to ResidentSadist)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: -=idiots, non consensual torture & FetLife=- - 5/1/2013 2:21:31 AM   
egern


Posts: 537
Joined: 1/11/2013
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: TieMeInKnottss

Send email to "[email protected]". It is located in the Terms of Service. Or "report at fetlife.com" replacing the "at" with the cutsy cursive "a" located on the #2 key...



Thanks, did not know either.

(in reply to TieMeInKnottss)
Profile   Post #: 40
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