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Misgivings. - 5/21/2013 6:24:11 AM

garyFLR

Posts: 4030
Joined: 5/11/2013
Status: offline

Hi. I'm sorry if I've posted this in the wrong place, but, I need some opinions.

Earlier today I was chatting to a lady member, & after a while she suggested a video chat on an adult dating site. It was free, but, it required my credit card details, at that point I felt uncomfortable & declined, I told the lady that I was not going to give my details to a 3rd party website, She has been a bit persistent, calling me on Yahoo Messenger.

Was I right to have misgivings? I remember a similar thread talking about the same thing.

I think I probably was, but I wanted it so much to be true, I maybe a submissive, but, I'm not daft.

Thanks everybody.

Post #: 1

RE: Misgivings. - 5/21/2013 6:29:05 AM

tabbz

Posts: 26
Joined: 5/13/2006
Status: offline

Id say you can chat free on video using chat on collarme....msn....yahoo and many other places...so I'd say you were right to have misgivings...if she still wants to talk...suggest one of them n see what response you get
good luck

(in reply to garyFLR)

Post #: 2

RE: Misgivings. - 5/21/2013 7:11:18 AM

DarkSteven

Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline

Free, but required CC info? Run far, run fast.

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to tabbz)

Post #: 3

RE: Misgivings. - 5/21/2013 9:21:32 AM

SeekingTrinity

Posts: 1834
Joined: 5/29/2012
From: The 'burbs of Portland, OR
Status: offline

~FRing it~

If it requires personal info from me that is no one else's damned business (credit card, bank account, home address, etc), Id have to say fuck that. Plenty of free ways to chat that dont require giving personal info. Sounds like a scam to me, OP.

(in reply to DarkSteven)

Post #: 4

RE: Misgivings. - 5/21/2013 12:12:04 PM

garyFLR

Posts: 4030
Joined: 5/11/2013
Status: offline

Thanks everyone, I'll suggest the alternatives to her, see what the response is. I think I can guess though

.

Best wishes, Gary.

(in reply to garyFLR)

Post #: 5

RE: Misgivings. - 5/21/2013 12:29:24 PM

MistressDarkArt

Posts: 5178
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: garyFLR

It was free, but, it required my credit card details,

Was I right to have misgivings?

Yes, you were right to have misgivings. Good on you for figuring this out before getting sucked in (not in any good way.)

Patience, lad. Not everyone is in this for money. Best of luck to you!

(in reply to garyFLR)

Post #: 6

RE: Misgivings. - 5/21/2013 12:41:03 PM

Rawni

Posts: 1175
Status: offline

If I ever get tried for some criminal act... I want you on the jury. I could sell you on anything if you are buying this scam.

quote:

ORIGINAL: garyFLR

Thanks everyone, I'll suggest the alternatives to her, see what the response is. I think I can guess though .

Best wishes, Gary.

She has already shown where her interest are and you are desperate enough to keep wasting your time and trying to make something, something it isn't, never will be and is clearly something others have warned you about?

It's like I always say: Scammers are given an assist by people wanting something for nothing, something fast and easy and something they don't believe they can get on their own. They get taken, they just may need the life lesson.

(in reply to garyFLR)

Post #: 7

RE: Misgivings. - 5/21/2013 1:06:30 PM

NiceButMeanGirl

Posts: 2756
Joined: 11/4/2011
From: Bellingham, WA U.S.A.
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: garyFLR
Was I right to have misgivings?

I think so. There are plenty of ways to video chat for free. CM chat, Yahoo IM, Windows Live IM, all sorts. If she wanted you to use a site that asks for credit card info, she's got something planned and it's NOT good. Like a scam.

NBMG

_____________________________

I'm now SweetlySadistic1 on CollarSpace. NBMG is an old profile, please see my new one.

(in reply to garyFLR)

Post #: 8

RE: Misgivings. - 5/21/2013 1:10:40 PM

Darkcast

Posts: 62
Joined: 9/7/2008
Status: offline

Yeah man you had every right for your misgivings. Anyone that asks you to sign up to a site that requests your credit card info is usually just a scammer. Even if it looks like you won't be charged there's usually some really really really fine print you don't notice that says there's a charge.

Also never listen to what people say about "I've removed the charge for you" or "I've deactivated charging." They're just trying to make a quick buck.

TBH, since I work on computers as a side job i typically have some fun with these people. First refusing to use my card acting that I'm playing safe. Then when they respond about deactivating charges and stuff I go into all my technical mumbo jumbo. It usually provides a good laugh as they stumble for responses. When I've laughed myself out I tell them I work on computers and they usually log off or go away after.

Is it kinda being a dick? maybe. But scammers deserve it.

(in reply to Rawni)

Post #: 9

RE: Misgivings. - 5/21/2013 2:04:31 PM

MistressDarkArt

Posts: 5178
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Darkcast

Is it kinda being a dick?

I think it's hilarious. Carry on!

(in reply to Darkcast)

Post #: 10

RE: Misgivings. - 5/21/2013 4:41:22 PM

RedMagic1

Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: garyFLR
Earlier today I was chatting to a lady member, & after a while she suggested a video chat on an adult dating site. It was free, but, it required my credit card details, at that point I felt uncomfortable & declined, I told the lady that I was not going to give my details to a 3rd party website, She has been a bit persistent, calling me on Yahoo Messenger.

This is a standard scam process. They can then link all your info to your Yahoo and whatever else.

Also, it's likely at this point that your chat ID has been sold. This is called harvesting. Low-level, poorly paid, people harvest hundreds or thousands of chat IDs from different sites, including CM, and more experienced scammers try to close deals.

_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to garyFLR)

Post #: 11

RE: Misgivings. - 5/22/2013 1:11:13 AM

garyFLR

Posts: 4030
Joined: 5/11/2013
Status: offline

Thankyou everyone for your thoughts!

Especially MistressDarkArt for her kind words & encouragement, also to Redmagic for the advice as to how to throw it back in their face

.
As I have been a member of CM for less than a fortnight, I don't expect miracles, I'm just enjoying the message boards & message chatting to people. If my Lady is out there, that would be the icing on the cake.

It's just that it was a real high when I thought I may have found my soul mate, I came down with a thump when I smelled the set up, I think that was the most upsetting part. I had one message from an idiot/scamster, how much more soul destroying when a Lady looking for someone, has to sift through maybe dozens of insincere messages, just to find someone she can take a chance on. I have every sympathy, as I've now had first hand experience of the 'dark side'.

I guess we all have to negotiate the mine fields & kiss a lot of frogs before we reach journeys' end

.

No, I won't give up, MistressDarkArt, there are a lot of good people here, & I won't let one nasty piece of work get me down.

Thankyou all again for your support, best wishes, Gary.

(in reply to MistressDarkArt)

Post #: 12

RE: Misgivings. - 5/22/2013 1:18:02 AM

garyFLR

Posts: 4030
Joined: 5/11/2013
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Rawni

If I ever get tried for some criminal act... I want you on the jury. I could sell you on anything if you are buying this scam.

quote:

ORIGINAL: garyFLR

Thanks everyone, I'll suggest the alternatives to her, see what the response is. I think I can guess though .

Best wishes, Gary.

She has already shown where her interest are and you are desperate enough to keep wasting your time and trying to make something, something it isn't, never will be and is clearly something others have warned you about?

It's like I always say: Scammers are given an assist by people wanting something for nothing, something fast and easy and something they don't believe they can get on their own. They get taken, they just may need the life lesson.

Hi Rawni, I was just being ironic, I know where her interests lie, I ran fast & far

.

(in reply to Rawni)

Post #: 13

RE: Misgivings. - 5/22/2013 6:35:35 PM

littlewonder

Posts: 15659
Status: offline

Wait...been on here a fortnight and thought you already found your soulmate???? Seriously????? Wow.

_____________________________

Nothing has changed
Everything has changed

(in reply to garyFLR)

Post #: 14

RE: Misgivings. - 5/22/2013 6:40:54 PM

ChatteParfaitt

Posts: 6562
Joined: 3/22/2011
From: The t'aint of the Midwest -- Indiana
Status: offline

Let me turn this question on it's head to give you a different perspective. If you met this woman at a party, and she told you she needed your credit card info before she could hand out her phone number, what would you think?

Respected pro dommes don't have to do a bait n switch, they are up front about who they are and what they will do for you for money. The rest of them are scammers.

_____________________________

(in reply to garyFLR)

Post #: 15

RE: Misgivings. - 5/22/2013 6:42:14 PM

MissToYouRedux

Posts: 867
Joined: 1/23/2010
Status: offline

Another small addition: matching up with kinks does not equal "soulmate"; a good, some here might think almost miraculous, step in the right direction

, but still not soulmate.

_____________________________

- Miss Marie

(in reply to littlewonder)

Post #: 16

RE: Misgivings. - 5/22/2013 11:59:41 PM

sexyred1

Posts: 8998
Joined: 8/9/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: garyFLR

Thankyou everyone for your thoughts!

Especially MistressDarkArt for her kind words & encouragement, also to Redmagic for the advice as to how to throw it back in their face .
As I have been a member of CM for less than a fortnight, I don't expect miracles, I'm just enjoying the message boards & message chatting to people. If my Lady is out there, that would be the icing on the cake.

It's just that it was a real high when I thought I may have found my soul mate, I came down with a thump when I smelled the set up, I think that was the most upsetting part. I had one message from an idiot/scamster, how much more soul destroying when a Lady looking for someone, has to sift through maybe dozens of insincere messages, just to find someone she can take a chance on. I have every sympathy, as I've now had first hand experience of the 'dark side'.

I guess we all have to negotiate the mine fields & kiss a lot of frogs before we reach journeys' end .

No, I won't give up, MistressDarkArt, there are a lot of good people here, & I won't let one nasty piece of work get me down.

Thankyou all again for your support, best wishes, Gary.

I am sorry that happened to you. People tend to have high expectations online and you really have to curb your enthusiasm and heed red flags.

(in reply to garyFLR)

Post #: 17

RE: Misgivings. - 5/23/2013 12:21:43 AM

garyFLR

Posts: 4030
Joined: 5/11/2013
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

Wait...been on here a fortnight and thought you already found your soulmate???? Seriously????? Wow.

Hi Littlewonder, Think it was too soon to have found a soul mate? Stranger things have happened, but, perhaps you're right, I was the one they were trying to scam

. Maybe I was excited having someone take an interest this early on, or perhaps I'm just an old romantic, it started off genuinely enough. I'll be more circumspect in future, I'm just a two week old minnow in a world where there are sharks

.

Best wishes, Gary.

(in reply to littlewonder)

Post #: 18

RE: Misgivings. - 5/23/2013 12:33:29 AM

garyFLR

Posts: 4030
Joined: 5/11/2013
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: ChatteParfaitt

Let me turn this question on it's head to give you a different perspective. If you met this woman at a party, and she told you she needed your credit card info before she could hand out her phone number, what would you think?

Respected pro dommes don't have to do a bait n switch, they are up front about who they are and what they will do for you for money. The rest of them are scammers.

Hi ChatteParfaitt, yes you're right, as soon as my cc was mentioned I backed off, it reeked of dodgyness! I'm really searching for a relationship rather than kinky game playing, so looking for friendship perhaps leading to more. Sounds very vanilla I know, the Lady first, anything else comes second, so I can never be tempted by a 'quick fix', so to speak.
Thankyou so much for the advice, take care, Gary.

(in reply to ChatteParfaitt)

Post #: 19

RE: Misgivings. - 5/23/2013 12:47:40 AM

garyFLR

Posts: 4030
Joined: 5/11/2013
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MissToYouRedux

Another small addition: matching up with kinks does not equal "soulmate"; a good, some here might think almost miraculous, step in the right direction , but still not soulmate.

Hi Miss Marie, we weren't going into kink, thought we were having a very 'nice getting to know you message chat', & when I realized I was being set up & backed off, she started offering me the whole 9 yards, which I found truly annoying, so I blanked her & she kept popping up. She gave up in the end though, thank goodness. I agree 'kink' doesn't have an equality with 'soulmate' as I've said above the Lady comes first, anything else second.
Thanks for your input, best wishes, Gary.

(in reply to MissToYouRedux)

Post #: 20

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