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RE: TRUST - 5/22/2013 7:29:52 PM

BitYakin

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Joined: 10/15/2005
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maybe you could tell me what year that was?

and while prodigy did eventually BECOME a fullfledged ISP for its first maybe DECADE it was a closed system...

ever heard of BITNET?

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RE: TRUST - 5/22/2013 7:33:38 PM

littlewonder

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Yup. I remember BITNET well.

I think I'll just sit back with my popcorn now and just watch the circus.

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Post #: 62

RE: TRUST - 5/22/2013 7:39:23 PM

tsatske

Posts: 2037
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From: Louisville, KY
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I have a problem with someone warning me off a supposed 'fake'. Fake what? Fake person? Fake sub? generally I assume it's one of two things: she's a 'fake' because she was not a match for him - which has no bearing on rather she might be a match for you. Or, a relationship of whatever duration, with him, ended, and he's unhappy about it and trying to squash any future relationships she might have. Does it bother you at all that he's still keeping track of her profile?

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Post #: 63

RE: TRUST - 5/22/2013 7:42:49 PM

BitYakin

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ya know what you are right, I shouldn't have let it get to me like it did

I was just frusterated at the thing being hijacked into some kinda ATTACK on ME instead of what I was trying to get an opinion about

the whole let us pick apart your background story and call ya names awhile then maybe if you entertain us we'll think about your question

I don't like being bullied, and I knew if I didn't say ANYTHING, the question would never have gotten adressed

maybe others would have read it, and answered but that would have happened long after I "walked away" and I never would have seen those answers

but yes you are right I didn't handle it well as I wish I had!

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RE: TRUST - 5/22/2013 7:48:58 PM

Missokyst

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Joined: 9/9/2006
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Ok...
First, in my opinion it is rude to share private emails. That aside, I have been online enough to know it might be manufactured drama. And since I don't play those games I would have told that guy, no thanks.
Second.. why ask what other people think about this? Does it really matter what additional strangers think?

quote:

ORIGINAL: BitYakin

I have a question for the communuty at large here

let me give a lil background, I am talking to a girl and I get an e-mail for someone who claims she made promises to him about this and that and the other thing
says she is a LIAR AND FAKE and I should wash my hands of her etc etc etc
in his mail he offers to send me mails and yahoo messages she sent him to show he is telling the truth

so here is my question, while I have no problem with somone warning people that someone else MAY be a player, am I the only one who thinks this person shows an UNTRUSTOWRTHY trait by offering to show PRIVATE MAILS and PRIVATE IMS to a COMPLETE STRANGER?

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RE: TRUST - 5/22/2013 7:54:37 PM

BitYakin

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tsatske

well according to him, until a few days prior to him mailing me, she was PROMISED to him

so him looking at or checking her profile, assuming he was telling the truth, is not unsusal in itself
I think probably they were talking, he read more into the conversations than was really there, was shocked to see she had chosen me over him, and I am teeling you he tried EVERYTHING to get me to break things off with her

he'd keep telling me how UNWORTHY and she was then in the SAME mail insinuate how he WANTED HER

I took his first mail at face value, even thanked him for warning me tried to be POLITE and he just went ON an ON an ON till finally I called him on his whole offering to share private mails and how I thought that was pretty LOW of him and he DEFENDED his action by saying he was DOING ME A FAVOR etc etc etc

it ended with me telling him to F OFF

if he had just sent me mail saying she is dishonest etc etc etc I could understand that, and if I had responded by calling him a liar then MAYBEEE offering to show me PROOF in the form of mails
but to start off right away with offering to share PRIVYE things with me, just didn't sit right with me
I didn't even call him on that part of it for several mails though, till it became clear his GOAL was to sabotoge us so he'd have a chance

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RE: TRUST - 5/22/2013 7:58:19 PM

BitYakin

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no it doesn't really matter what other stangers think, id ever single person here had said I think what he did is perfectly fine I'd still think it was pretty low of him

I was just CURIOUS what other people would think

I mean isn't that the POINT of these forums, to get other peoples OPINIONS on random STUFF

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RE: TRUST - 5/22/2013 8:39:05 PM

TheHeretic

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From: California, USA
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quote:

ORIGINAL: BitYakin

yeah I am the CHILDISH ON HERE!

QFT

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RE: TRUST - 5/22/2013 8:40:52 PM

TheHeretic

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quote:

ORIGINAL: BitYakin

I mean isn't that the POINT of these forums, to get other peoples OPINIONS on random STUFF

Sometimes. Other times, it's to stick needles in the tits of fools.

This IS a website full of sadists, y'know.

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RE: TRUST - 5/22/2013 8:48:02 PM

freedomdwarf1

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quote:

ORIGINAL: BitYakin

no it doesn't really matter what other stangers think, id ever single person here had said I think what he did is perfectly fine I'd still think it was pretty low of him

I was just CURIOUS what other people would think

I mean isn't that the POINT of these forums, to get other peoples OPINIONS on random STUFF

Yep, I quite agree - that's what forums are for.... usually.

But the ONE thing you jumped on your high horse about was that other people were looking at the whole scenario without addressing your direct question.
That is how people can answer things with reasonable opinion when knowing the full facts and the story behind when/why/who/what prompted the question in the first place.
It is foolhardy to even attempt to answer a random question without knowing at least a fair proportion of where or why the question is even being asked.
Quite often, a question is irrelevant if the asker has thought about why they are asking it. **
We see that a LOT on here.
Hence the reasoning and questions about the background to the question rather than the question itself.
If you were that au-fait with the internet and IRC (which started in August 1988 btw) you would have instantly known your earlier responses were indeed childish and very inappropriate on any forum.

That aside, I do consider the forwarding of "private" messages and emails to be inappropriate.
If you were that concerned about this random dude who contacted you, your first reaction (after your initial reply) should have been to hide and block them.
The question as to the legal 'ownership' of such messages should be pretty obvious - they belong to the provider of the message system unless specifically excluded within the Terms of Service agreement. That is why most courts can subpoena any and all records pertaining to, and of, any and all individuals or groups who have agreed to the ToS of the service provider (not necessarily the ISP) and could, theoretically, become public record. Never assume anything is really "private" on the internet.

And I also agree with many posters on here that you openly slagged off.
Why??
Because it is usually a bad judgement call to attempt to answer any question, no matter how trivial, without knowing at least the pertinent details of the background.
Attempting to formulate an answer in isolation more often than not ends in the responder having to make too many assumptions and probably providing the wrong answer or taking the question out of context.
In essence, LL was right. Until you have actually met and chatted with this girl, face-to-face, niether of you owe any allegience to anyone, let alone each other, in this sort of environment.

Just my

** ETA: If you think what other people think about the scenario is irrelevant... Why ask the question??
QFT!

< Message edited by freedomdwarf1 -- 5/22/2013 8:54:17 PM >

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RE: TRUST - 5/22/2013 8:55:47 PM

Missokyst

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For future reference you might consider that many of us here on this side have heard similar stories ad~nauseum. Velcro collars are very common in chat rooms, and posting that one is under consideration is one form of drama, so is people calling out fake, threats of exposure, ect. I am sure most of those who posted on the other pages of this thread would not be ok with having their private emails sent to others, but when we see this type of drama over and over it is tough not to be.. jaded.
And let's face it, it is easier to address the OP (opening post) and that behavior because we can only react to your side. Unfortunately your side is still is open to judgement because you are defending someone you have not yet met, against someone you don't know.

quote:

ORIGINAL: BitYakin

I was just CURIOUS what other people would think

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RE: TRUST - 5/22/2013 8:56:39 PM

LafayetteLady

Posts: 7683
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From: Northern New Jersey
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You know what? Let's look at your robbery example. You could ask ONE question, but it really can't be answered without looking at the whole of the robbery. You asked ONE question, but the WHOLE situation comes into play as to whether or not your question has any validity.

Emails are NOT copyrighted material, nor is any of that bullshit people put at the bottom of their profiles. As for whether or not emails are "private," if you put it on the internet, whether it is through email or not, it isn't "private." You may have some expectation of privacy, and you might actually get some.

You ARE acting like a two year old having a temper tantrum. Food for thought, if the IRC was developed for the government, I guess you were a PLUMBER for the government?

The fact that you *told* her to put "under consideration" on her profile talks of you living in fantasy land. The fact that you didn't want to mention it on yours before you met face to face shows you are an ass who is likely looking to get some power where ever you can, and figured you could get it by ordering some anonymous woman on the internet and having her follow it.

If this woman is actually going to choose you over the other guy, he must not even be the bottom of the barrel, but underneath the barrel, since your behavior here has shown YOU are at the bottom.

Good thing you DIDN'T post you were *considering* her in your profile. Someone here might have taken pity on her and directed her to this post. Trust me, should she see it before she meets you, she would be stupid to show up.

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RE: TRUST - 5/22/2013 9:39:59 PM

DarkSteven

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quote:

ORIGINAL: BitYakin

tsatske

well according to him, until a few days prior to him mailing me, she was PROMISED to him

so him looking at or checking her profile, assuming he was telling the truth, is not unsusal in itself
I think probably they were talking, he read more into the conversations than was really there, was shocked to see she had chosen me over him, and I am teeling you he tried EVERYTHING to get me to break things off with her

he'd keep telling me how UNWORTHY and she was then in the SAME mail insinuate how he WANTED HER

I took his first mail at face value, even thanked him for warning me tried to be POLITE and he just went ON an ON an ON till finally I called him on his whole offering to share private mails and how I thought that was pretty LOW of him and he DEFENDED his action by saying he was DOING ME A FAVOR etc etc etc

it ended with me telling him to F OFF

if he had just sent me mail saying she is dishonest etc etc etc I could understand that, and if I had responded by calling him a liar then MAYBEEE offering to show me PROOF in the form of mails
but to start off right away with offering to share PRIVYE things with me, just didn't sit right with me
I didn't even call him on that part of it for several mails though, till it became clear his GOAL was to sabotoge us so he'd have a chance

Look, the whole thing shows that he's trying to get her. I'm not certain what the real story is, but if he'd be willing to share emails to sabotage her, he'd likely be willing to lie.

Don't even think of asking for proof. You're already waist deep in drama as is. You have the choice - ignore all the bullshit and just meet her, or drop the whole think.

I think she's worth a meeting.

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The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

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RE: TRUST - 5/22/2013 11:47:15 PM

sexyred1

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quote:

ORIGINAL: BitYakin

of course, every single scenerio is POSSIBLE

she's not real he's not real I amnot real etc etc etc

but the question was what do people think about someone who would just out of the blue offer to share someone elses PRIBATE MAILS

of course there is ALOT more to the story, but those DETIALS had nothing to do with the actual question!

why does everyone have to SPECULATE about the IF's AND's or BUT's of this and ignore the question

talk about DRAMA geeezzzz

Why speculate? Because life comes in shades of grey, not black and white.

You think we are mean? Wow.

Anyway, your shouting and freaking out is somewhat entertaining so please report back on the real life meeting.

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RE: TRUST - 5/23/2013 5:04:27 AM

ResidentSadist

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After seeing the bees nest open up in the first few replies, I'm just gonna' FR this one.

Both the guy and the girl are batshit crazy and so will you if you get involved with either of them. I don't care of she is a DDD cup playboy bunny, look at the drama you are in already. And you wanna' tap that ass and go deeper? Are you nuts or desparate?

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RE: TRUST - 5/23/2013 8:30:20 AM

OsideGirl

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quote:

ORIGINAL: freedomdwarf1
It is foolhardy to even attempt to answer a random question without knowing at least a fair proportion of where or why the question is even being asked.
Quite often, a question is irrelevant if the asker has thought about why they are asking it. **

That was exactly my point. The question he asked was moot until all the other questions were answered.

Why bother even worrying about some guy emailing you, when you don't even know the person that he's emailing you about?

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RE: TRUST - 5/23/2013 8:47:27 AM

lizi

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My opinion is that this situation is entirely bizarre. You're talking to a woman from the internet and some guy jumps into this private area of your life from out of nowhere...wtf? What I think about his tactics is secondary to the fact that it's utterly weird to have this happen in the first place. It's too much drama, I'd be out of the whole thing in a heartbeat, but I do have a low tolerance for drama.

Yes, I think it's slimy to share personal communications. Do you have all the information behind his offer...I don't think so.

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RE: TRUST - 5/23/2013 8:48:38 AM

MAINEiacMISTRESS

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How OLD is this guy? Sounds like the behavior of a teen or early-20's (or a recluse). They are very prone to what I call "rejection tantrums". They act all nice until you tell them NO for something, and then they EXPLODE and go out of their way to attempt to slander or threaten you because they haven't lived enough of life to know that everyone else won't give them what they want like Mommy has. Most likely she said No to him for something stupid he wanted, and he's having a tantrum in an attempt to "teach her a lesson" (because it always worked on Mom). IGNORE HIM, get to know her and decide for YOURSELF. One person's "fake" is often another person's "best match".
--MM

quote:

ORIGINAL: BitYakin

I have a question for the communuty at large here

let me give a lil background, I am talking to a girl and I get an e-mail for someone who claims she made promises to him about this and that and the other thing
says she is a LIAR AND FAKE and I should wash my hands of her etc etc etc
in his mail he offers to send me mails and yahoo messages she sent him to show he is telling the truth

so here is my question, while I have no problem with somone warning people that someone else MAY be a player, am I the only one who thinks this person shows an UNTRUSTOWRTHY trait by offering to show PRIVATE MAILS and PRIVATE IMS to a COMPLETE STRANGER?

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RE: TRUST - 5/23/2013 9:53:06 AM

TieMeInKnottss

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Yes, purely from the observation of privacy of email conversations...it is strange. It is one thing to "repeat" a conversation which most people will think of as "tattling" " gossip" and most discount because it is being offered secondhand & subject to being incorrect... I guess it comes down to...you now have to be careful of ANY type of written communication because of the physical record... If you don't want something used against you...don't write it down... Think about all the stuff we say to each other that would be forgotten which, because it is in writing someone can print out and spread...

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RE: TRUST - 5/23/2013 10:30:21 AM

stef

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MAINEiacMISTRESS

How OLD is this guy? Sounds like the behavior of a teen or early-20's (or a recluse). They are very prone to what I call "rejection tantrums". They act all nice until you tell them NO for something, and then they EXPLODE and go out of their way to attempt to slander or threaten you because they haven't lived enough of life to know that everyone else won't give them what they want like Mommy has.

Wait, are you describing the OP or the guy the OP is whining about?

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