RE: How to legitimately seek a submissive without sounding fake

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All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Submissive >> RE: How to legitimately seek a submissive without sounding fake

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RE: How to legitimately seek a submissive without sound... - 5/30/2013 12:18:28 PM

inchargeinca

Posts: 25
Joined: 5/26/2013
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

quote:

ORIGINAL: inchargeinca

quote:

ORIGINAL: Tatsuchan18

Thanks for replying, we do have a couples profile and I probably should be using it. Good idea.

Personally, I think it's a mistake to approach women as a couple if it's really just the man who is looking for another sub who will not interact with you as a couple.

I think, for one thing, you are not appreciating that most subs won't be interested in a dom who already has a sub. So you approaching them for him, or approaching them as a couple, is probably a negative.

Not really.

I would want to know that his current partner is on board with the situation. So, at some point I would want to talk to both.

I would say you are probably in the minority.

(in reply to OsideGirl)

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Post #: 21

RE: How to legitimately seek a submissive without sound... - 5/30/2013 12:40:26 PM

AthenaSurrenders

Posts: 3582
Joined: 3/15/2012
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: inchargeinca

quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

Not really.

I would want to know that his current partner is on board with the situation. So, at some point I would want to talk to both.

I would say you are probably in the minority.

In every discussion I've seen about looking for a third the majority of people say they would want to at least talk to the other partner to make sure he or she is on board.

Granted I have no idea whether a solo profile for him or a couple's profile would get more response, but I don't think Oside is in the minority about wanting to be sure everyone is on the same page. Who wants to be caught in the middle of another couple's relationship problems if it turns out one of them isn't as on board as the other?

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Post #: 22

RE: How to legitimately seek a submissive without sound... - 6/1/2013 9:05:01 PM

JeffBC

Posts: 5799
Joined: 2/12/2012
From: Canada
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Tatsuchan18
What I'm asking is, is there any defining factor, words, or feeling you get from an email that makes you feel like replying or taking the person seriously? I do my best to read the full profile, state my intentions clearly, ask them about themselves and try to start up a discussion. Yet i keep reading over my own emails and I'm even starting to sound fake in my head. How can I realistically be taken seriously by potential play partners?

Stop worrying about it. If you are actually seeking to engage with another human in a realistic and authentic fashion then that should communicate just fine. The whole gig with you out looking for play partner for your master is ... well ... creepy

_____________________________

I'm a lover of "what is", not because I'm a spiritual person, but because it hurts when I argue with reality. -- Bryon Katie
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(in reply to Tatsuchan18)

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Post #: 23

RE: How to legitimately seek a submissive without sound... - 6/2/2013 10:34:22 AM

Tatsuchan18

Posts: 31
Joined: 8/26/2007
Status: offline

He's now using our couples profile to look for people, I guess he just needed a little encouraging. :3

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RE: How to legitimately seek a submissive without sound... - 6/2/2013 10:38:22 AM

orgasmdenial12

Posts: 613
Joined: 9/18/2012
Status: offline

When I was single I often received messages from subs wanting me to play with their Doms. I always said no.

The unfortunate fact is that I would never, ever be the slightest bit interested in a) a Dom who can't or won't contact me himself or b) already has a submissive. In all honesty, I very much doubt you are going to find many single female submissives who do want to play with your Dom - they will want a Dom of their own, most likely.

I doubt it is your phrasing that is off, I think you are simply searching for something that is very unlikely and, as such, it's going to take you a long time, if ever, to find another submissive for him. I would limit your contact to those who state that they are actively looking for a poly arrangement as you will save time contacting those who will not be interested.

(in reply to Tatsuchan18)

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Post #: 25