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[Poll]

Truth or manners


Insult the meal saying it wasn't as good as you had hoped
  0% (0)
Lie and say 'It was good, thank you'
  27% (13)
Just say 'thank you'
  66% (32)
In Chef Ramsay style, toss the plate on the floor while screaming
  6% (3)


Total Votes : 48
(last vote on : 7/21/2013 11:19:06 AM)
(Poll will run till: -- )
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Truth or manners - 5/31/2013 8:39:31 PM   
theshytype


Posts: 1600
Status: offline 		Someone cooks dinner and bakes a cake for you. While not the best, it's edible and you've had MUCH worse. Which of the options best describes your response, and would your response differ depending on the person?

< Message edited by theshytype -- 5/31/2013 8:40:29 PM >
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RE: Truth or manners - 5/31/2013 8:44:13 PM   
NuevaVida


Posts: 6707
Joined: 8/5/2008
Status: offline 		I would be gracious and say thank you. I would compliment something I liked about it. I mean, cake has sugar in it, right?

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RE: Truth or manners - 5/31/2013 8:45:45 PM   
tazzygirl


Posts: 37833
Joined: 10/12/2007
Status: offline 		I would say thank you, find something to compliment about the meal, and be thankful I didnt have to cook that night.

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Dont judge me because I sin differently than you.
If you want it sugar coated, dont ask me what i think! It would violate TOS.

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RE: Truth or manners - 5/31/2013 8:46:30 PM   
angelikaJ


Posts: 8641
Joined: 6/22/2007
Status: offline 		Someone took the time and made the effort to cook and bake for me: of course I am gracious!

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RE: Truth or manners - 5/31/2013 9:02:40 PM   
Duskypearls


Posts: 3561
Joined: 8/21/2011
Status: offline 		I would tell them how grateful I am they went out of their way to make a remarkable meal for me, and how much I enjoyed it.

That's not quite the same as saying, "You're a fabulous cook, and everything was delicious," and it's being kind and gracious.

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RE: Truth or manners - 5/31/2013 9:56:17 PM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline 		I would tell them thank you for the meal and that it was very nice of them to go through all of that trouble for me.

This way you are neither insulting them or the meal and yet being a gracious guest.


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RE: Truth or manners - 5/31/2013 10:14:37 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		Yep, I'm a thank you type. The food has to be pretty screwed up for Me not to appreciate the fact that somebody made it for Me. I think the last thing that I complained about were some very underdone eggs (scrambled) that were so runny that they literally made us sick.


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RE: Truth or manners - 5/31/2013 10:15:57 PM   
LittleGirlHeart


Posts: 1427
Joined: 4/4/2013
Status: offline 		Ditto.
quote:

ORIGINAL: tazzygirl

I would say thank you, find something to compliment about the meal, and be thankful I didnt have to cook that night.


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RE: Truth or manners - 5/31/2013 10:24:36 PM   
theshytype


Posts: 1600
Status: offline 		Yeah, I figured it was pretty common courtesy to just say thank you at the very least.
I paid for, cooked and baked after working and while taking care of kids, and cleaned up afterwards. No 'thank you' just 'It's a little watery" and the cake wasn't "as chocolaty as I was hoping". Are you serious? Was it the best I ever made? No. Have I ever claimed to be a master chef? No. I was a little peeved to say the least.
End. Of. Rant.

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RE: Truth or manners - 5/31/2013 10:50:37 PM   
NuevaVida


Posts: 6707
Joined: 8/5/2008
Status: offline 		Sounds like that's the last time you ought to cook for that person.

The Mister teases me now, about something I had shared with him. There was a man I was seeing - we had completely different cultures. He's a black man from the south, and I'm Spanish/Italian. I once made him an incredible (if I say so myself) pasta. The sauce was very close to my grandmother's recipe, and one of the best (in my opinion) I had ever made.

He took a bite, looked at me, went to the kitchen, and came back with a bottle of ketchup. He said it wasn't sweet enough, and poured ketchup all over his plate of pasta. I practically had a heart attack!

So now, if I've cooked an "OK" meal for the Mister (which - if I may boast - is rare. He loves my cooking), he smiles and says, "Well it doesn't need ketchup." Ha.

_____________________________

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Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Truth or manners - 6/1/2013 12:37:17 AM   
ARIES83


Posts: 3648
Status: offline 		I try to be as honest as posible, I'm the worst person to buy presents for...
If I don't like it or can't use it I will be honest about it. I wont be an asshole, but I won't just smile and lie.
"I appreciate the thought, but I don't think I'll be able to use it."
"Thank you, I might be able to find a place for it, but don't get me anything else though, I'm trying to cut down on clutter."

Whats wrong with that? Better to be open and honest...

Probably my most used saying when something doesn't blow my socks off is: "It's not too bad."
Haha, thats the closest I usually come to trying to tippy toe around someones feelings.

Constructive critisim delivered with a bit of care and humour is worth a million white lies...

**Ahh, forgot a P.S...
It's been said before but to put it out there again, being a Dom doesn't mean you need to act like a spoilt, entitled wanker with no manners... Thanking someone is a matter of courtesy IMO... I say pardon me when I burp most of the time. Even if I'm alone... It's just programmed in by upbringing haha... I think manners is one of my more domly qualities actually... I try to hold myself to the standard I like to be surrounded by!***

< Message edited by ARIES83 -- 6/1/2013 12:47:53 AM >

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RE: Truth or manners - 6/1/2013 1:51:23 AM   
needlesandpins


Posts: 3901
Status: offline 		I like to be told the truth if i'm practicing something and have asked for an opinion on how it tastes, how could it be better and such. I want the truth if someone doesn't like what I've made too. however, if something isn't up to my usual standard then I already know and have probably apologised for it as I serve.

no matter what though my boy always thanks me for cooking for him, as I do when he cooks for me. DrG cooks for me too when we are together and has criticised his own cooking, but I have found it to be exactly what I needed. as others have said i'm grateful that I haven't had to cook, or have had help in the kitchen. I went through 16 years of having to cook every day, make the choices about what was cooked because he could never make a choice, and have him think that it was a crime for me to ask that he cooked a full English on the rare occasions that we had it. it's lovely to have someone else make the effort for me, and they will be thanked regardless.

I once had the ex's parents over for Christmas dinner, and it was what I thought a perfect meal. everything went to plan, the timings were all in sync, the turkey was juicy and the roasted potatoes were crispy on the outside, but lovely and fluffy in the middle. it was my first Christmas cooking for others and had been very stressed with it being his parents, so I was very relieved when I thought it all turned out so well. his mother pushed everything around her plate before eating it like i'd given her slops, and said 'I don't roast my potatoes in fat anymore. I've got used to them dry roasted so wouldn't thank anyone for roasting them in fat anymore'. and that was the sum total of comment on all my hard work. she may not have thanked me for cooking my roasties in fat, but she sure ate plenty of them.

needles



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RE: Truth or manners - 6/1/2013 4:56:08 AM   
Kaliko


Posts: 3381
Joined: 9/25/2010
Status: offline 		The first time I met my ex-husband's grandmother, I brought an apple pie. She said it was "interesting."

"Thank you" would have sufficed. :)


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Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Truth or manners - 6/1/2013 5:08:03 AM   
DarkSteven


Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline 		Say "It was a very good meatloaf, although kinda sweet."

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The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

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Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Truth or manners - 6/1/2013 5:13:09 AM   
ChatteParfaitt


Posts: 6562
Joined: 3/22/2011
From: The t'aint of the Midwest -- Indiana
Status: offline 		When someone cooks for you, you say thank you.

If you want to be a food critic, spam some magazines until you find a gig.

BTW: If I paid for the food, I'm happy to complain, although I do take into consideration where I am. My local diner is not going to have the same standards as the best restaurant in NYC, yaknow?

_____________________________



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Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Truth or manners - 6/1/2013 9:12:07 AM   
Hillwilliam


Posts: 19394
Joined: 8/27/2008
Status: offline 		I'm a good cook and fairly well known for it so I'll give an appraisal, find things to compliment, find things that I want to incorporate into my cooking that I didn't know about and offer suggestions on improvement.

They learn, I learn, we both get better.

ETA, if Ramsey pulled that crap in my house, I'd tell him to leave and if he got pissy, I'd tell him that his little punk ass was requested in the back yard.

< Message edited by Hillwilliam -- 6/1/2013 9:13:29 AM >

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RE: Truth or manners - 6/1/2013 9:14:26 AM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline 		I'm pretty much with everyone else. I would say thank you because at the very least someone took time out of their day and made an effort. I would try to find something to honestly compliment.

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RE: Truth or manners - 6/1/2013 9:30:13 AM   
calamitysandra


Posts: 1682
Joined: 3/17/2006
Status: offline 		If somebody cooked for me, I would absolutely thank that person.
The person took time out of his/her day to do something nice for me. I would be thankful.

Now, if I am asked for my opinion, I will be honest. Not insulting, mind you, and I will lead with the positive aspects, but I will give an honest critique. But no way would I be rude about it.

As a passionate cook myself, I always tell people I have cooked for that I appreciate honest feedback, it helps me develop my skills.
A reaction like the one you got, theshytype, would most likely lead to me not ever cooking for that person again.


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RE: Truth or manners - 6/1/2013 10:04:04 AM   
cordeliasub


Posts: 528
Joined: 11/4/2012
Status: offline 		I would say thank you. If they ASK me for my take or for pointers then I would tactfully give them. NOT criticizing is not being dishonest...it's being gracious.

That being said, I have a friend who feels compelled to "help" people any time she is given something, cooked for, reads a book that was recommended, etc. because she's "just an honest person" (her words).

She sang at a talent thing we both participated in (it was for charity and you didn't have to be professional or even that good). I have a Masters in music and sing very frequently. Afterward, she said, "I'm glad that's over! I was nervous."

I calmly outlined for her the errors in her breathing, intonation, tone, and nicely suggested that perhaps next time she could just write them a check. She looked....taken aback, and I just smiled and said, "I'm just being honest." We both ended up laughing about it.....but I'll tell ya this - she no longer feels "compelled" to help me "improve myself."

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RE: Truth or manners - 6/1/2013 11:26:24 AM   
MasterCaneman


Posts: 3842
Joined: 3/21/2013
Status: offline 		If I'm paying for a meal, it damn well better live up to my expectations (which are decidedly low to begin with), and while I'd like to do a Gordon Ramsay (and voted as such), I won't be a total dick about it unless I get resistance. And I have made managers and cooks sample what was served to me. Each and every time they sided with me afterwards, so I'm not wrong in doing so.

As for home-cooking, I'm not as fussy and am quite appreciative of someone else's efforts, no matter how bad the result. I do most of the cooking when I'm over at the GF's house simply because I'm better at it than she is. That woman can burn water and forgot the recipe for ice to be honest, and freely admits it. Simple stuff like salads she can handle, but anything that requires proper cooking/seasoning she is not allowed near the kitchen, even in her own house. She told me that with her last ex before meeting me, she tried to make chicken wings on the stove and managed to give him, her, and three of their friends food poisoning.

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