RE: place to complain/warn about users? (Full Version)

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littlewonder -> RE: place to complain/warn about users? (6/13/2013 9:32:02 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: missxxxercy


Well I was looking for the company of like minded individuals, to discuss crap that they have dealt with. But now I can just chalk it up to out of every couple of cool people on this site, there are just trolls and people who live to start shit.



yeah sorry but my mind thinks nothing like yours.




missxxxercy -> RE: place to complain/warn about users? (6/13/2013 9:33:52 PM)

Dont be sorry.




Rawni -> RE: place to complain/warn about users? (6/13/2013 9:35:35 PM)

Actually, the OP did want to do the beware of.... thing, but some of the responding posts have been out in left field. She hid nothing from anyone in her profile and has tried to answer here in a decent manner. She has been accused of things I see no sign of anywhere. When has she not claimed to be a prodom? It's right in her profile.

So she may have wanted to blast someone for something, but mentioned no names and did ask about it before she stepped all over herself or the forum. Then she was accused of many things. Which is worse?

We have pro and findoms that are active on the forums. What makes one acceptable and another attacked? One mistake, done respectfully?




littlewonder -> RE: place to complain/warn about users? (6/13/2013 9:37:01 PM)

It doesn't matter to me what or who she is. I was just curious about her logic behind the whole daycare thing.




descrite -> RE: place to complain/warn about users? (6/13/2013 11:38:22 PM)

OP, your question seems sincere (in context with the rest of your posts), but originally came across as a request for access to a flame/blacklist board.

Your follow-up was a bit disjointed and offputting: "Do you want to know why I actually charge for sessions? Not because I just cant or dont want to get a job, but because I have three amazing kids who I want to actually raise myself instead of throw in daycare to work a meaningless job. I actually have passion and desire behind what I do, AND it allows me to be what I consider a better mom to my kids. "

That does not sound rational. The cost/benefit tradeoff seems way off.

That's a bad way of justifying your career choice. A better way would be to say, "Fuck off. I like my job."

I, for once, would be very interested to hear about the event that caused you to first come here and want to post. I imagine it's interesting.




LafayetteLady -> RE: place to complain/warn about users? (6/14/2013 3:39:12 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Rawni

Actually, the OP did want to do the beware of.... thing, but some of the responding posts have been out in left field. She hid nothing from anyone in her profile and has tried to answer here in a decent manner. She has been accused of things I see no sign of anywhere. When has she not claimed to be a prodom? It's right in her profile.

So she may have wanted to blast someone for something, but mentioned no names and did ask about it before she stepped all over herself or the forum. Then she was accused of many things. Which is worse?

We have pro and findoms that are active on the forums. What makes one acceptable and another attacked? One mistake, done respectfully?


Actually, no, her profile doesn't say she is a pro domme at all. If it had, I wouldn't have made the comment that I did. I have no problem with pros, I just think they should be up front about it in their profile.




Rasciallymisty -> RE: place to complain/warn about users? (6/14/2013 6:02:36 AM)

Miss I think if you want like minded people to vent with, like someone else said, visit the Mistress thread. They might be the closest to your way of thinking and understand your venting best.

Sorry the forums can be a tough place to fit in, LOL do like I did in the beginning do not get into it with some that seem to like to debate everything. I find it easier just not to answer them back and talk with the ones that are helpful, but at the same time do not feed into them either by doing back what has been done to you. Hope you will not let this thread scare you off and that you join in on discussions once again. Also there is a great little button on this side that allows you to hide post from people who's post you rather not read. There really are some good people here that you can learn a lot from if you stick around.

It does seem, but it always has since I joined the very first time way back in 2004, that newbies have to jump through hoops to be accepted here at times. Its not right but it is how its been.




chatterbox24 -> RE: place to complain/warn about users? (6/14/2013 6:34:00 AM)

Does thou have a chip on thee shoulder, should one cast a stone to knock it off? LOL.

Wow, wow, wow.

PMS?

This poster asked a legit question, and it went from that to questioning her as a mother? The ass-umptions keep growing.

To the OP, really wouldn't be fair to post about others in a forum, what one person found an extreme nut, might be someone's perfect cup of tea. If someone is performing criminal acts, the authorities would be the best route.




missxxxercy -> RE: place to complain/warn about users? (6/14/2013 6:49:35 AM)

I mean, if you can't tell about pro-domme in my profile, I dont really know what to tell ya, I havent had an issue with it yet.

What I WAS going to say, and maybe because I have never experienced it before, was that (in interest of the who use Amazon for tribute/gifting) That they can mark an item as purchased, and it shows up like they bought it and really didnt. Which had me waiting for mail like an idiot. I have NEVER heard of that happening, and was interested if it happened to anyone else. I wasnt interested in naming the person that did it, but talk about how users are doing it.
I guess it does come off as I wanted to blacklist him. Which in all fairness, it is scummy to do and I would like to give him a good whack for it.

I know some people are going to go on and on about how Im crying or shouldnt require tribute or I deserve it, or whatever the fuck, and I dont care.
It still frustrated me.

Ill just go yell into my pillow instead. Always alone, even in a crowd of people.




searching4mysir -> RE: place to complain/warn about users? (6/14/2013 7:36:50 AM)

quote:

What I WAS going to say, and maybe because I have never experienced it before, was that (in interest of the who use Amazon for tribute/gifting) That they can mark an item as purchased, and it shows up like they bought it and really didnt.


I'm not a pro/fin-domme but I've heard of that happening to them before. Usually it's because the sub has had second thoughts and cancelled the transaction and/or their credit card didn't go through.

I have a feeling that it is par for the course.




Rasciallymisty -> RE: place to complain/warn about users? (6/14/2013 8:34:56 AM)

Not sure if you think I have a chip on my shoulder...LOL but far from it. I never once said she was not being a good mother I simple asked her about her munchkins as she brought them up. I also have not made any assumptions about the poster.

OP as far as you question now goes....I can not answer as I have never used that service.




TheLilSquaw -> RE: place to complain/warn about users? (6/14/2013 8:54:51 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: missxxxercy



What I WAS going to say, and maybe because I have never experienced it before, was that (in interest of the who use Amazon for tribute/gifting) That they can mark an item as purchased, and it shows up like they bought it and really didnt. Which had me waiting for mail like an idiot. I have NEVER heard of that happening, and was interested if it happened to anyone else.




I've never had this personally happen.
However, it sounds as if the order was cancelled but you can always email amazons customer support and ask them. They are wonderful about answering questions.

ETA: I just read your profile and to ME it wasn't clear that you are a pro simply that you practice financial domination and one doesn't automatically mean the other.




tazzygirl -> RE: place to complain/warn about users? (6/14/2013 10:43:17 AM)

quote:

What I WAS going to say, and maybe because I have never experienced it before, was that (in interest of the who use Amazon for tribute/gifting) That they can mark an item as purchased, and it shows up like they bought it and really didnt. Which had me waiting for mail like an idiot. I have NEVER heard of that happening, and was interested if it happened to anyone else. I wasnt interested in naming the person that did it, but talk about how users are doing it.


I have seen that complaint a few times. I think that question would be better suited in the Domme section, instead of general BDSM. The "Ask a Mistress" section tends to get the foot traffic from both groups who would be your target audience for responses... the Dommes and the male subs.

quote:

I know some people are going to go on and on about how Im crying or shouldnt require tribute or I deserve it, or whatever the fuck, and I dont care.
It still frustrated me.


No, its your kink... and theirs. I, personally, see nothing "submissive" about someone who makes a promise, then sneakily takes back that promise. It destroys the foundation of trust, no matter what the relationship.

I do not deal with tributes, from either side of the kneel. But it could be a valid question to have a discussion about.

After peeking at your profile, I can say that the last photo you have posted is against the rules. Its a private message between you and that person. The site frowns on those being put up those screenshots as pics because you are basically "blacklisting" that person by revealing their name and the contents of a private email.





missxxxercy -> RE: place to complain/warn about users? (6/14/2013 10:54:42 AM)

he was a douchebag. I get tired of it. I took it down anyways because I just realized he was trying to get a rise out of me and fed in to it. Live & learn.




tazzygirl -> RE: place to complain/warn about users? (6/14/2013 10:59:00 AM)

You will run across many like that here. Dont let them under your skin.. and never let them know they get to you. [;)]




Whiplashsmile4 -> RE: place to complain/warn about users? (6/14/2013 12:09:19 PM)

missxxxcery,

There is no formal blacklist and with good reasons. There are a number of possible situations where such a blacklist can be misused. There are more than enough shady people which would not think twice about fabricating stories and threaten to blacklist somebody (ie blackmail). Also there are situations where misunderstandings occur, where one believes that they are using a blacklist with the best of intentions...however the actual reality of the situation is a completely different story.

Another aspect are the personality types of people in involved. Some people are excellent with Good Communication and can deal with confrontational situations and resolve any issues quickly. Some people simply piss themselves silly, shut down and run off in avoidance mode (which does nothing to clear up any misunderstandings). Some people are extremely more sensitive to things than they need to be. On the flip side of the coin, some people take things for granted that the person they are dealing with is not so sensitive.

So it's best to not provide a way for people to name names and point fingers out in the public. CM does provide a means to report certain types of abuse. This is all done privately. There are also functions to block people from contacting you. All of which are truly useful.

All in ALL, there can be conflicts between different personality types...along with mental/emotional stability factors. Not to mention some people are sincerely ruthless assholes out to fuck with other people.

The message boards here allow you to open up a thread about specific topics or issues you are having. Long as you don't openly name names or point fingers. However, in using the boards here be prepared to have your issue picked and pulled apart. You are subjecting yourself and part of your personal life to public opinion. You may find this experience unpleasant to deal with. Things can quickly become heated and out of control. Also, keep in mind that things like Tone of voice and body language are missing in written words. Your own perception of things may become skewed about the responses made.

There are a wide range of personalities types on this message board. Some people are here for pure fucking entertainment. So keep in mind and be prepared for things to turn into a Jerry Springer show of sorts. This all depends upon how people perceive you personally and the posts you make. How you use words and your own emotional state of mind at the time, will play an impact on your interaction with people here.

Welcome to the message boards.









MissKittyDeVine -> RE: place to complain/warn about users? (6/14/2013 12:18:52 PM)

Missxxx,

I'm afraid that pro/findommes do get a lot of flak around here. Don't let that put you off posting. Everybody gets flamed at first, although I don't think it was fair to bring your kids into it.




SeekingTrinity -> RE: place to complain/warn about users? (6/14/2013 12:29:51 PM)

~FRing it~

Unfortunately, OP...there are going to be people who play little games. Some tend to have strong anti-fin/pro Domme feelings and will deliberately target folks like you just to fuck with you. This person getting a rise out of you means they win. You go calling them out in your journal or start threads specifically to call someone out for screwing around with you...and they win. But you saying "fuck it" and moving on without all that means you win. Don't give 'em that power over you.

Don't let it get to you. Easier said than done maybe, but ultimately it's better for you in the long run.




MissToYouRedux -> RE: place to complain/warn about users? (6/14/2013 12:38:51 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: TheLilSquaw

ETA: I just read your profile and to ME it wasn't clear that you are a pro simply that you practice financial domination and one doesn't automatically mean the other.



While that is true, potential subs are still notified up front that money will be part of the equation.

Welcome to the boards, OP.




TNDommeK -> RE: place to complain/warn about users? (6/14/2013 1:07:40 PM)

Fast reply...

I've never had the amazon thing happen. But like Squaw said,must email em. They'll answer.




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