RE: gags and safewords

RE: gags and safewords (Full Version)

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Mellissande -> RE: gags and safewords (6/15/2013 11:25:12 AM)
The best thing I have found is a dog's training clicker. You can attach it to your partner's hand via keyring around the thumb or a stretchy wrist band. It is near impossible to click it accidentally, so that works very well and is definitely loud enough to get your attention even if you aren't close enough for watching for hand signals. ***** EDITED to say that this was a Fast Reply****

lizi -> RE: gags and safewords (6/15/2013 11:52:56 AM)
Our signal was that I was to reach out and tap his thigh. If my arms were restrained, he adjusted the velcro strap on the gag loosely enough so that I could spit it out with some force - it's a ball and post style so it still stayed in well even with some give to the strap.

kalikshama -> RE: gags and safewords (6/15/2013 1:19:47 PM)
Our gagged safe-signal is for me to snap my fingers but he usually can tell before then.

littlewonder -> RE: gags and safewords (6/15/2013 4:29:18 PM)
I just trust him to know my body language. No safeword or movements or objects.

SomethingCatchy -> RE: gags and safewords (6/15/2013 10:58:00 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SeekingTrinity ~FRing it~ Having a gagged submissive hum "happy birthday" if in distress has worked well for me. But above all else, I feel it's my responsibility to pay attention to my submissive to gauge what's going on. I've also had someone hum or shout something that I could understand. I also believe it's my responsibility when I'm topping to know what's really going on with someone.

SWDesertDom -> RE: gags and safewords (6/15/2013 11:52:33 PM)
...---...

Just0Us0Two -> RE: gags and safewords (6/16/2013 12:23:57 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: littlewonder I just trust him to know my body language. No safeword or movements or objects. Well sure, with someone you've been with a while and are in sync with, that's fine, but the OP specifically asked about safe-words or signals.

Tinkerer -> RE: gags and safewords (6/16/2013 12:54:15 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SWDesertDom ...---... Or three of anything, repeating. It doesn't have to be SOS

kiwisub12 -> RE: gags and safewords (6/16/2013 6:35:22 AM)
I like the idea of a bell - that way, even if your dom isn't looking at you directly, the tinkle will alert him/her to an issue.

Greta75 -> RE: gags and safewords (6/16/2013 7:47:41 AM)
Okay, I've only really have experience with ball gags and maybe have my panties stuffed in my mouth or something. But both types of gags, I was able to still mutter my safe word audibly.

SomethingCatchy -> RE: gags and safewords (6/16/2013 3:55:14 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: kiwisub12 I like the idea of a bell - that way, even if your dom isn't looking at you directly, the tinkle will alert him/her to an issue. I immediately thought of a tinkle of another sort... That'd get his attention, too!

littlewonder -> RE: gags and safewords (6/16/2013 6:40:04 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Greta75 Okay, I've only really have experience with ball gags and maybe have my panties stuffed in my mouth or something. But both types of gags, I was able to still mutter my safe word audibly. Then they obviously weren't in very well. I can barely breathe let alone mutter much of anything with the gags Master uses on me.

GotSteel -> RE: gags and safewords (6/16/2013 7:10:03 PM)
Some of the people are having a lark with using hard to say words while gagged. It makes for a hilarious thread but I'd avoid actually doing it. Keep in mind that one of the potential issues with being gagged is choking (it's labeled gag for a reason). Having to use complex verbal cues while your trying not to vomit because of your gag reflex or choking on your saliva or aspirating on your own vomit is likely sub-ideal. As such I'd suggest a physical cue, possibly shaking your head or a previous poster recommended snapping your fingers.

UllrsIshtar -> RE: gags and safewords (6/16/2013 7:23:21 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: littlewonder quote: ORIGINAL: Greta75 Okay, I've only really have experience with ball gags and maybe have my panties stuffed in my mouth or something. But both types of gags, I was able to still mutter my safe word audibly. Then they obviously weren't in very well. I can barely breathe let alone mutter much of anything with the gags Master uses on me. What types does he use? I've been searching high and low for a gag that will actually gag me. Barring inflatables, nothing works. I've actually seriously considered making a ball gag out of a tennis ball, because it's the only size ball I can find that I can fit between my teeth comfortably, while being unable to dislodge it easily by pulling in my jaw. I don't like the texture on them though, and they also don't prevent me from speaking at all, so I haven't yet. Most insertable gags I've found, of any variety, doesn't even prevent me from articulating proper speech, if I try a little. Harness gags with a strap under the chin are the only ones that do, but they still don't prevent yelling/screaming/mumbling.

littlewonder -> RE: gags and safewords (6/16/2013 8:39:44 PM)
nothing special. They don't stop all sound but there's definitely no way I can articulate any word clearly when I'm gagged. Most of the time he gags me with panties or something and duct tape or a regular ball gag or smothers me with a pillow. I can talk through the pillow but there's no way with the thickness that anything I say is decipherable. Usually he makes sure the gags are extremely tight so there's no way it's ever going to get loose or leave loud sounds out. Thankfully where I live we don't really have to worry about noise. My landlord is rarely home plus he already knows we have kinky sex. I was having drinks with him and his wife one night and asked him if he ever heard any loud noises coming from our bedroom (which faces his backyard) and he just laughed and said "you don't hear us, do you?" and laughed so yeah...not worried. And I don't really have any other neighbors connected to my place.

Kana -> RE: gags and safewords (6/17/2013 1:03:27 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: UllrsIshtar quote: ORIGINAL: littlewonder quote: ORIGINAL: Greta75 Okay, I've only really have experience with ball gags and maybe have my panties stuffed in my mouth or something. But both types of gags, I was able to still mutter my safe word audibly. Then they obviously weren't in very well. I can barely breathe let alone mutter much of anything with the gags Master uses on me. What types does he use? I've been searching high and low for a gag that will actually gag me. Barring inflatables, nothing works. I've actually seriously considered making a ball gag out of a tennis ball, because it's the only size ball I can find that I can fit between my teeth comfortably, while being unable to dislodge it easily by pulling in my jaw. I don't like the texture on them though, and they also don't prevent me from speaking at all, so I haven't yet. Most insertable gags I've found, of any variety, doesn't even prevent me from articulating proper speech, if I try a little. Harness gags with a strap under the chin are the only ones that do, but they still don't prevent yelling/screaming/mumbling. Yeah-you and mouse have divergent problems. He mouth is so small I can't find a decent ring gag-your problem, and a terrific one it is (Cuz inflatables are schweeeeeeeeeet not to mention the other obvious advantages of a slave who can truly open wide), is the polar opposite.

OsideGirl -> RE: gags and safewords (6/17/2013 1:10:08 PM)
Same here. A bunch of you are reminding me of my ex: "Your safe word is a word in Swahili..." I looked at him and said, "I'm lucky if I remember my own name and you want me to remember a word in Swahili?"

DesFIP -> RE: gags and safewords (6/17/2013 2:12:26 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Just0Us0Two quote: ORIGINAL: littlewonder I just trust him to know my body language. No safeword or movements or objects. Well sure, with someone you've been with a while and are in sync with, that's fine, but the OP specifically asked about safe-words or signals. And why do you think you can't have both? There are times I go nonverbal, if he hits an emotional trigger. He has to pay attention to my body language then because relying on me to stop things won't happen. And for those who go into deep subspace, the ability to safeword, to talk can't be depended on. A good top knows this. This is why basic knowledge of body language is so important. If someone is relaxed, things are probably okay. If they're turning away from you and every muscle is tensed, then things aren't going well. And it's the top's responsibility to check in with the bottom. "Can you take three more?". "Are you okay?". "You're ready to stop now, aren't you?". Except when they've hit subspace and can't feel their own body or answer any questions. At which point the top needs to err on the side of caution unless they know the bottom extremely well. There are times when I indicate a problem with my hands or by grunting repeatedly. Personally, anybody who won't bother to check in with me, won't pay attention to how I'm doing, and assumes they don't have to stop unless I safeword is one I wouldn't give the time of day to let alone trust to play with.

UllrsIshtar -> RE: gags and safewords (6/17/2013 2:13:25 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Kana Yeah-you and mouse have divergent problems. He mouth is so small I can't find a decent ring gag-your problem, and a terrific one it is (Cuz inflatables are schweeeeeeeeeet not to mention the other obvious advantages of a slave who can truly open wide), is the polar opposite. Ah yeah that would explain it. I have a natural maximum bite (without external pressure added) of about 57mm (2.24 inches) so even the extra large ring gags of 2.5 inches, I can easily flip in my mouth and expel, unless they're attached to a harness. I've never found a non-inflatable non-harnass that I can't expel, because on top of having a large bite, I can pull in my jaw to get the gag over my teeth and chin to completely drop down to my neck, if I want to. And that's with the strap tight enough that it will leave bruises on my cheekbones. It's really annoying to most tops, considering how much I love to talk and give "helpful" comments to what he's doing. [;)]

Kana -> RE: gags and safewords (6/17/2013 4:01:26 PM)
What about some dental equipment-one of those mouth dilators and some rubber wedges to lock your back teeth open. An oral speculum so to speak. (Or he could just run take some hooks and chain through your lower lip to your labia and your upper lip to your septum [8\|])

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