quote:

ORIGINAL: sansa

(Because so many here are so offended by third person speech, it will not be utilized in this post asking for advice, so that you all may be more comfortable)

Ok, so here's the background. i live with my ex for the time being, though it won't be for much longer.

In July, i went to visit the Master who is considering me, and His first girl. While there, i was branded. A permanent mark is something i've always asked for in the past, but no other Dom/Master has granted the request, this includes the ex.

So, tonight, the ex goes to a party with mutual lifestyle friends and while he's there, i receive a text from him regarding it.

Now, i've posted about the brand here and to fet and to another place, it's not been hidden, at least not online on lifestyle sites. He's just not ever seen the pics and updates because he's not on my friends lists nor is the brand kept uncovered by clothing to where he would be able to see it while i'm walking around the house. If he happened across the pics or updates while perusing these sites, that would be one thing. But he found out about it at a lifestyle party from mutual friends.

Here's the question:

How should i react to this? Or should i even react and just go on as if nothing were amiss and let him come to me? And if i do learn who "outed" me about this, should i discuss it with them or leave it be? At first, i was surprised because our local community is very outspoken about respecting others' right to privacy and not making announcements for other people without direct permission, and not assuming everyone knows everything about everyone else. Yet this happens. It should have been my Master's and my choice for the ex to be told about it. Again, if he'd have stumbled across it, fine, i'd have answered the questions at that time, if he'd deigned to ask them.

But am i right to feel disappointed in my friends' lack of respect?

These issues are like apples and oranges to me, sorry. I cannot compare "publishing an announcement" (posting pix) in the equivalent of a kinksters' newspaper...to getting branded at a play party and expecting others to be discreet when around folks who weren't there.

You posted pix of your new brand over at several lifestyle sites...basically you're the one who shouted it from the rooftops and was indiscreet.

I'm startled by hearing that someone would get a permanent brand when they are under consideration and not yet owned. Maybe some of your fellow kinksters are like me, feeling that a permanent brand is equivalent to a collar and assumed that the ex you are still living with knew about it.

Psst...over at Fet he wouldn't have to be on your friends list to search out your profile and look at your recent pix and recent posts. You. Wouldn't. Even. Know. There are a few people whose writings I stalk over there cuz they're fun reads. Same goes for their pix. Fet's not like CM, there's no button that lights up when someone has looked at your complete profile (not yet, anyway).

Congratulations.

quote:

ORIGINAL: getoutnow
The questions you have to ask yourselves, is why didn't the other Doms brand her?

Maybe they had the similar thoughts that I had? Who knows/cares.