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JeffBC -> RE: success in finding BDSM through vanilla (9/6/2013 7:41:12 PM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: jc26
Outside though in day to day actions I would say he was not a dominant personality type when not relating to me specifically.
Most people are not. Most subs are not sub outside the relationship either. Usually what we talk about here is roles within a relationship.
The fact that he's not all Bruce Willis outside the front door has little or nothing to do with how you to interact in your home. Don't let that get you down. I'm kind of the reverse. I'm quite a bit more "dominant" outside the home than in it. That's because Carol needs the volume toned down a lot. She's pretty sensitive on the D/s band. If I acted with her like I act at work I'd crush her without meaning too.
It is normal (and obviously wise) human behavior to act differently in the different roles we find ourselves throughout our lives. If the default interaction between you two has him in the lead position that's all the start you need. Hell, 50/50 would be a good enough start point in my mind. But as I said, I got a lot of faith in words like "love", "strength", "determination", and "teamwork".
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