sub n training (Full Version)

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Submissive



Message


BiancaRain -> sub n training (9/19/2013 11:02:04 AM)

HOW do I get better at taking my spankings..And be more submissive.




OsideGirl -> RE: sub n training (9/19/2013 11:05:26 AM)

Better how?




TheLilSquaw -> RE: sub n training (9/19/2013 11:15:20 AM)

OP,
What do you mean by being a better sub?

My universal answer would be, ask your owner what you can do to better serve them.

As far as taking spankings, not everyone can handle corporal punishment and there are various reasons why people can't handle it. Some are physical reasons and other are mental / emotional reasons all of which are valid. If it is a matter of not being able to handle it due to the pain, I would suggest building your pain tolerance.

To ME punishments are fun and shouldn't be but IF you are constantly getting in trouble and needing to be punished.
To ME you both should be asking why.




BiancaRain -> RE: sub n training (9/19/2013 11:15:26 AM)

Its the sting I do not like, thanks.. what would be a good begginer step.





TheLilSquaw -> RE: sub n training (9/19/2013 11:26:48 AM)

OP,

If it's the sting that you can't take, that is your pain tolerance.

The 1st time I was ever paddled with a wood paddle, I cried like a baby for days and couldn't sit down.
I wanted that teacher dead.
Now I own that exact same type of paddle and love it. Lol

I have a high pain tolerance now but that took years of conditioning.




kalikshama -> RE: sub n training (9/19/2013 11:33:24 AM)

quote:

HOW do I get better at taking my spankings


A spanking with a bare hand? I've been getting these for decades and don't particularly like the sensation. I do love a thuddy flogger though. Got my eye on this:

[image]http://www.detailstoys.com/images/2007/07roses350.jpg[/image]

You can read up on thuddy and stingy on the various flogger pages here: http://www.detailstoys.com/floggers.html




angelikaJ -> RE: sub n training (9/19/2013 11:45:35 AM)

Punishment in our dynamic is rare.

I love being spanked.

I used to have a strong preference for thud but I appreciate sting now.
Spanking for me is a reward.


Many Dominant/submissive-type dynamics don't include any spanking.

If you don't like being spanked then why are you in a relationship that includes it?
That is no attack of you, your master or your relationship; it is simple a question asking you to clarify your choice.

How do you want to be a better sub?

What is difficult or what do you feel as though you are lacking in?

It might not be that you aren't submissive enough... it may just be that you aren't submissive enough for him.

If that is the case, it is not a failure on your part.
It would be that the 2 of you are simply incompatible as partners in a D/s relationship..




DesFIP -> RE: sub n training (9/19/2013 12:21:51 PM)

Have him learn how to raise someone's pain tolerance. Have him learn to accept that not everybody is going to ever love pain.

But you can't learn what he can't teach.




BiancaRain -> RE: sub n training (9/19/2013 2:13:28 PM)

He is going to start on training tonight.. I'm scared. I have a decent tolerance is like repetition that hurts to me from the sting.. I can do like 3 extreme but then it hurts so bad. But I want and can get better with it I guess




OsideGirl -> RE: sub n training (9/19/2013 2:39:01 PM)

[8|]




angelikaJ -> RE: sub n training (9/19/2013 2:42:52 PM)

Do you have a safe word?

If so, do you feel okay in using it?

What is the goal of his training you?





kalikshama -> RE: sub n training (9/19/2013 3:03:08 PM)

Does he know how to warm you up or does he just start whacking away?




BiancaRain -> RE: sub n training (9/19/2013 3:37:12 PM)

We are both kinda new to this world.. warm up sounds good.

Its weird cause it hurts.
But he could punch me in face and it would just be foreplay but the sting grr sting.




angelikaJ -> RE: sub n training (9/19/2013 3:41:10 PM)

http://www.amazon.com/Screw-Roses-Send-Thorns-Sadomasochism/dp/0964596008





angelikaJ -> RE: sub n training (9/19/2013 4:15:23 PM)

Maybe these will be useful?

Links on erotic or sensuous spankings:

http://www.kinkly.com/2/868/beyond-missionary/bdsm/your-hand-my-ass-erotic-spanking-for-beginners

http://www.wewomen.com/sex-sexuality/how-to-spank-d51069c592173.html

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ucIDoWvJbZw





kalikshama -> RE: sub n training (9/19/2013 4:25:24 PM)

quote:

We are both kinda new to this world.. warm up sounds good.

Its weird cause it hurts.
But he could punch me in face and it would just be foreplay but the sting grr sting.


I can take sensations I don't like - like from a bare hand or cane - if they are mixed in with ones I do like, such as the flogger. It's also easier to tolerate if I know how many whacks are going to happen ahead of time.

Since y'all are new, he should definitely warm you up first, and also experiment with different sensations. I once had a play partner running around the house like MacGyver looking for things to hit me with, lol.




BiancaRain -> RE: sub n training (9/19/2013 5:20:18 PM)

Lmafo. Love the reference. Yes we are working on it Tonight..




lizi -> RE: sub n training (9/19/2013 6:28:44 PM)

If spankings are something you really do not like, what is the purpose in pursuing them? Is it something he enjoys?




SerWhiteTiger -> RE: sub n training (9/19/2013 7:56:10 PM)

Sounds like the problem isn't with you...




BiancaRain -> RE: sub n training (9/20/2013 7:14:54 AM)

No it was.. lmafo I think I was not being like relaxed, because it didn't hurt a bit.




Page: [1] 2   next >   >>

Valid CSS!




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy
0.046875