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sub n training - 9/19/2013 11:02:04 AM   
BiancaRain


Posts: 12
Joined: 9/17/2013
Status: offline 		HOW do I get better at taking my spankings..And be more submissive.
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RE: sub n training - 9/19/2013 11:05:26 AM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline 		Better how?

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RE: sub n training - 9/19/2013 11:15:20 AM   
TheLilSquaw


Posts: 2340
Joined: 10/24/2012
From: Middle River, MD
Status: offline 		OP,
What do you mean by being a better sub?

My universal answer would be, ask your owner what you can do to better serve them.

As far as taking spankings, not everyone can handle corporal punishment and there are various reasons why people can't handle it. Some are physical reasons and other are mental / emotional reasons all of which are valid. If it is a matter of not being able to handle it due to the pain, I would suggest building your pain tolerance.

To ME punishments are fun and shouldn't be but IF you are constantly getting in trouble and needing to be punished.
To ME you both should be asking why.


< Message edited by TheLilSquaw -- 9/19/2013 11:16:50 AM >

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RE: sub n training - 9/19/2013 11:15:26 AM   
BiancaRain


Posts: 12
Joined: 9/17/2013
Status: offline 		Its the sting I do not like, thanks.. what would be a good begginer step.



< Message edited by BiancaRain -- 9/19/2013 11:17:58 AM >

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RE: sub n training - 9/19/2013 11:26:48 AM   
TheLilSquaw


Posts: 2340
Joined: 10/24/2012
From: Middle River, MD
Status: offline 		OP,

If it's the sting that you can't take, that is your pain tolerance.

The 1st time I was ever paddled with a wood paddle, I cried like a baby for days and couldn't sit down.
I wanted that teacher dead.
Now I own that exact same type of paddle and love it. Lol

I have a high pain tolerance now but that took years of conditioning.


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Lifestyle & ProSwitch
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(in reply to BiancaRain)
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RE: sub n training - 9/19/2013 11:33:24 AM   
kalikshama


Posts: 14805
Joined: 8/8/2010
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quote:

HOW do I get better at taking my spankings


A spanking with a bare hand? I've been getting these for decades and don't particularly like the sensation. I do love a thuddy flogger though. Got my eye on this:



You can read up on thuddy and stingy on the various flogger pages here: http://www.detailstoys.com/floggers.html

(in reply to BiancaRain)
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RE: sub n training - 9/19/2013 11:45:35 AM   
angelikaJ


Posts: 8641
Joined: 6/22/2007
Status: offline 		Punishment in our dynamic is rare.

I love being spanked.

I used to have a strong preference for thud but I appreciate sting now.
Spanking for me is a reward.


Many Dominant/submissive-type dynamics don't include any spanking.

If you don't like being spanked then why are you in a relationship that includes it?
That is no attack of you, your master or your relationship; it is simple a question asking you to clarify your choice.

How do you want to be a better sub?

What is difficult or what do you feel as though you are lacking in?

It might not be that you aren't submissive enough... it may just be that you aren't submissive enough for him.

If that is the case, it is not a failure on your part.
It would be that the 2 of you are simply incompatible as partners in a D/s relationship..

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RE: sub n training - 9/19/2013 12:21:51 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		Have him learn how to raise someone's pain tolerance. Have him learn to accept that not everybody is going to ever love pain.

But you can't learn what he can't teach.

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RE: sub n training - 9/19/2013 2:13:28 PM   
BiancaRain


Posts: 12
Joined: 9/17/2013
Status: offline 		He is going to start on training tonight.. I'm scared. I have a decent tolerance is like repetition that hurts to me from the sting.. I can do like 3 extreme but then it hurts so bad. But I want and can get better with it I guess

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RE: sub n training - 9/19/2013 2:39:01 PM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

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RE: sub n training - 9/19/2013 2:42:52 PM   
angelikaJ


Posts: 8641
Joined: 6/22/2007
Status: offline 		Do you have a safe word?

If so, do you feel okay in using it?

What is the goal of his training you?



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30 fluffy points!

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RE: sub n training - 9/19/2013 3:03:08 PM   
kalikshama


Posts: 14805
Joined: 8/8/2010
Status: offline 		Does he know how to warm you up or does he just start whacking away?

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RE: sub n training - 9/19/2013 3:37:12 PM   
BiancaRain


Posts: 12
Joined: 9/17/2013
Status: offline 		We are both kinda new to this world.. warm up sounds good.

Its weird cause it hurts.
But he could punch me in face and it would just be foreplay but the sting grr sting.

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RE: sub n training - 9/19/2013 3:41:10 PM   
angelikaJ


Posts: 8641
Joined: 6/22/2007
Status: offline 		http://www.amazon.com/Screw-Roses-Send-Thorns-Sadomasochism/dp/0964596008



_____________________________

The original home of the caffeinated psychotic hair pixies.
(as deemed by He who owns me)

http://www.collarchat.com/m_3234821/tm.htm

30 fluffy points!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mQjuCQd01sg

(in reply to BiancaRain)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: sub n training - 9/19/2013 4:15:23 PM   
angelikaJ


Posts: 8641
Joined: 6/22/2007
Status: offline 		Maybe these will be useful?

Links on erotic or sensuous spankings:

http://www.kinkly.com/2/868/beyond-missionary/bdsm/your-hand-my-ass-erotic-spanking-for-beginners

http://www.wewomen.com/sex-sexuality/how-to-spank-d51069c592173.html

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ucIDoWvJbZw



_____________________________

The original home of the caffeinated psychotic hair pixies.
(as deemed by He who owns me)

http://www.collarchat.com/m_3234821/tm.htm

30 fluffy points!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mQjuCQd01sg

(in reply to angelikaJ)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: sub n training - 9/19/2013 4:25:24 PM   
kalikshama


Posts: 14805
Joined: 8/8/2010
Status: offline
quote:

We are both kinda new to this world.. warm up sounds good.

Its weird cause it hurts.
But he could punch me in face and it would just be foreplay but the sting grr sting.


I can take sensations I don't like - like from a bare hand or cane - if they are mixed in with ones I do like, such as the flogger. It's also easier to tolerate if I know how many whacks are going to happen ahead of time.

Since y'all are new, he should definitely warm you up first, and also experiment with different sensations. I once had a play partner running around the house like MacGyver looking for things to hit me with, lol.

(in reply to BiancaRain)
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RE: sub n training - 9/19/2013 5:20:18 PM   
BiancaRain


Posts: 12
Joined: 9/17/2013
Status: offline 		Lmafo. Love the reference. Yes we are working on it Tonight..

(in reply to kalikshama)
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RE: sub n training - 9/19/2013 6:28:44 PM   
lizi


Posts: 4673
Joined: 2/1/2009
Status: offline 		If spankings are something you really do not like, what is the purpose in pursuing them? Is it something he enjoys?

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RE: sub n training - 9/19/2013 7:56:10 PM   
SerWhiteTiger


Posts: 437
Joined: 8/12/2013
From: Why is my name Florida? That's a state!
Status: offline 		Sounds like the problem isn't with you...

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RE: sub n training - 9/20/2013 7:14:54 AM   
BiancaRain


Posts: 12
Joined: 9/17/2013
Status: offline 		No it was.. lmafo I think I was not being like relaxed, because it didn't hurt a bit.

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Profile   Post #: 20
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