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Humiliation/Degrading - 10/3/2013 3:57:06 PM   
MasterS502


Posts: 2
Joined: 9/3/2013
Status: offline 		So I am a newer male Master, and I am training a male sub. He is really into being humiliated and degraded BUT there are hurdles: He submissive lifestyle is private, and not known to his gf. Also, can't do anything public. It seems like those things are making it difficult for me to come up with some ideas.

Please group, I could use your help with ideas.
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RE: Humiliation/Degrading - 10/3/2013 4:01:52 PM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterS502
He is really into being humiliated and degraded BUT there are hurdles: He submissive lifestyle is private, and not known to his gf.
So, you've accepted a submissive that's a liar.

quote:

Also, can't do anything public.
If you need to involve the non-consenting public in order to humiliate him, then you have larger issues.

quote:

It seems like those things are making it difficult for me to come up with some ideas.
Nope. It's you.

quote:

Please group, I could use your help with ideas.
I would suggest slowing it down, because if you need a group of strangers to come up with ideas about the person you're supposed to be in a relationship with, then you're doing something wrong.

ETA: Maybe you should tell his GF. I bet he'd get TONS of humiliation.....

< Message edited by OsideGirl -- 10/3/2013 4:10:02 PM >

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to MasterS502)
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RE: Humiliation/Degrading - 10/3/2013 4:03:40 PM   
kalikshama


Posts: 14805
Joined: 8/8/2010
Status: offline 		Make him write "Cheating is wrong and I need to develop a moral compass" 100,000 times.

ETA - since you mentioned you were newish - do you happen to be familiar with any of the non-fiction books in the booklist? They were very valuable to my (now ex) husband and me when we were new to BDSM.






< Message edited by kalikshama -- 10/3/2013 4:18:03 PM >

(in reply to MasterS502)
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RE: Humiliation/Degrading - 10/4/2013 8:25:31 AM   
MasterS502


Posts: 2
Joined: 9/3/2013
Status: offline 		Thanks kalikshama! No I do not know about the books, but I will look into them. I appreciate YOU being helpful.

(in reply to kalikshama)
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RE: Humiliation/Degrading - 10/4/2013 10:04:09 AM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline 		Kali -

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to MasterS502)
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RE: Humiliation/Degrading - 10/4/2013 12:44:11 PM   
noellesdestiny


Posts: 94
Joined: 9/3/2012
Status: offline 		It sounds to me you are extremely limited already. That's a tough one that needs some honesty.

(in reply to OsideGirl)
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RE: Humiliation/Degrading - 10/4/2013 3:17:51 PM   
sunshinemiss


Posts: 17673
Joined: 11/26/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterS502

Thanks kalikshama! No I do not know about the books, but I will look into them. I appreciate YOU being helpful.


Passive aggressive comment...

You might not like what Oside said, but they are fair points.

Things that embarrass people are unique to the individual. We don't know you or him, so how could we help?

And by the way, a "master" knows what he is doing.

good luck,
sunshine

_____________________________

Yes, I am a wonton hussy... and still sweet as 3.14

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RE: Humiliation/Degrading - 10/4/2013 3:17:59 PM   
SerWhiteTiger


Posts: 437
Joined: 8/12/2013
From: Why is my name Florida? That's a state!
Status: offline 		Spank him in front of his GF.

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RE: Humiliation/Degrading - 10/4/2013 3:23:13 PM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SerWhiteTiger

Spank him in front of his GF.


Yeah, but if the GF has not consented to be a part of their kink....it's not fair to her.

But, since I feel that cheating and being involved with a cheater shows a lack of ethics....violating the GFs space would be on par with the lack of ethics already shown.

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to SerWhiteTiger)
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RE: Humiliation/Degrading - 10/4/2013 4:24:49 PM   
SerWhiteTiger


Posts: 437
Joined: 8/12/2013
From: Why is my name Florida? That's a state!
Status: offline 		Yes, exactly. They've already violated the gf's consent.

(in reply to OsideGirl)
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RE: Humiliation/Degrading - 10/4/2013 5:07:35 PM   
LeatherBentOne51


Posts: 89
Joined: 12/28/2012
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterS502

So I am a newer male Master, and I am training a male sub. He is really into being humiliated and degraded BUT there are hurdles: He submissive lifestyle is private, and not known to his gf. Also, can't do anything public. It seems like those things are making it difficult for me to come up with some ideas.

Please group, I could use your help with ideas.



What's the difference in what you're doing and him being on the "down low?" Granted he is not married to her but he is still lying by omission. And, that is not a very good thing to do. Ever wonder if he lies to you?

And you are wanting advice? Sorry. You are just as guilty for participating in this charade as he is. For that, I can't see how you call refer to yourself as a Master. You can't even live your own life in honesty.

Sorry, but I know you will hate my comment. And, frankly my dear, I don't give a damn.

LBO51

(in reply to MasterS502)
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RE: Humiliation/Degrading - 10/4/2013 11:02:12 PM   
MalcolmNathaniel


Posts: 1394
Joined: 9/20/2010
Status: offline 		Regardless of how you look at this there are three people involved. All three people need to be informed of what is happening.

'All BDSM books and lectures stress honesty. If you can't expect honesty out of your sub and are willing to allow that then you need to strip the word "Master" from your nick.

I have 2 girls, but all of us know about each other. If you cant build that conversation with both of them then you need to make a decision for which there is only one answer if you have any honor.

(in reply to MasterS502)
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RE: Humiliation/Degrading - 10/6/2013 2:25:33 AM   
Kana


Posts: 6676
Joined: 10/24/2006
Status: offline
quote:

It seems like those things are making it difficult for me to come up with some ideas.

Nah,give credit where credit is due. It ain't the external circumstances as much as it is the lack of internal originality.

Be the source of your own evil suckas,don't come vampire offa mine.I work hard for that shit, stay up late at night scheming and plotting. Real evil takes effort, it don't just come natural, ya know.

_____________________________

"One of God's own prototypes. A high-powered mutant of some kind never even considered for mass production. Too weird to live, and too rare to die. "
HST

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RE: Humiliation/Degrading - 10/6/2013 5:49:03 AM   
littleone14


Posts: 185
Joined: 7/4/2012
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Kana
Real evil takes effort, it don't just come natural, ya know.


You mean you aren't naturally evil? I'm shocked. .

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RE: Humiliation/Degrading - 10/6/2013 8:53:33 AM   
Kana


Posts: 6676
Joined: 10/24/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: littleone14


quote:

ORIGINAL: Kana
Real evil takes effort, it don't just come natural, ya know.


You mean you aren't naturally evil? I'm shocked. .


Consider it being like a topflight athlete. One is born blessed with a skill set less than 1% of people possess, yet skill alone is not enough. One must spend hours honing said skills, invest blood, sweat, tears,skin and scars to achieve the goal and actualize the dream.
Evil works much the same way.To be the best, you hafta give the best

_____________________________

"One of God's own prototypes. A high-powered mutant of some kind never even considered for mass production. Too weird to live, and too rare to die. "
HST

(in reply to littleone14)
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RE: Humiliation/Degrading - 10/6/2013 11:55:22 AM   
MasterCaneman


Posts: 3842
Joined: 3/21/2013
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Kana


quote:

ORIGINAL: littleone14


quote:

ORIGINAL: Kana
Real evil takes effort, it don't just come natural, ya know.


You mean you aren't naturally evil? I'm shocked. .


Consider it being like a topflight athlete. One is born blessed with a skill set less than 1% of people possess, yet skill alone is not enough. One must spend hours honing said skills, invest blood, sweat, tears,skin and scars to achieve the goal and actualize the dream.
Evil works much the same way.To be the best, you hafta give the best

So I suppose that means you dress your minions in Hugo Boss? Anything less would be...crass and unsophisticated >puts pinkie to corner of mouth and chortles<

_____________________________

Age and treachery will always overcome youth and ambition.

The supreme art of war is to subdue the enemy without fighting. ~ Sun Tzu

Goddess Wrangler



(in reply to Kana)
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RE: Humiliation/Degrading - 10/6/2013 12:16:37 PM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterCaneman


quote:

ORIGINAL: Kana


quote:

ORIGINAL: littleone14


quote:

ORIGINAL: Kana
Real evil takes effort, it don't just come natural, ya know.


You mean you aren't naturally evil? I'm shocked. .


Consider it being like a topflight athlete. One is born blessed with a skill set less than 1% of people possess, yet skill alone is not enough. One must spend hours honing said skills, invest blood, sweat, tears,skin and scars to achieve the goal and actualize the dream.
Evil works much the same way.To be the best, you hafta give the best

So I suppose that means you dress your minions in Hugo Boss? Anything less would be...crass and unsophisticated >puts pinkie to corner of mouth and chortles<

Kana sez, "Nada, Sir. Hugo Boss is so passe. In our household the minions prefer Calvin Klein. They say, and this is a direct quote-it's comfy yet still stylish and nice"

_____________________________

Nothing has changed
Everything has changed

(in reply to MasterCaneman)
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RE: Humiliation/Degrading - 10/23/2013 9:50:10 AM   
MRJames99


Posts: 1
Joined: 10/23/2013
Status: offline 		Make the slave send you an e-mail or text each morning and evening briefly explaining its day and thanking you for your training him. Come up with some situations that you want him to write about. Example (depending on your type of relationship) if you were to accompany me to the mall, how would you act? If you were to spend the weekend with me, tell me how it would go etc.

The mind is an amazing tool.

(in reply to OsideGirl)
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RE: Humiliation/Degrading - 10/23/2013 10:47:16 AM   
SeekingTrinity


Posts: 1834
Joined: 5/29/2012
From: The 'burbs of Portland, OR
Status: offline 		~FRing it~

Sorry, OP...can't help you. Doing your job for you and essentially using you as nothing more than a puppet to carry out my ideas isn't going to help you master anything. My advice...learn your craft before proclaiming yourself a master of it.

(in reply to MRJames99)
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RE: Humiliation/Degrading - 10/23/2013 11:24:16 AM   
RedMagic1


Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterS502
Please group, I could use your help with ideas.

This is a fairly common problem, though I've seen it more often in the context of a woman who is a professional dominatrix, or phone sex operator, who wants to demand that as part of a man's service to her that he be supportive toward his wife or girlfriend. For example, I had a friend who would insist that her phone slaves spend as much money on their gf as they did on their Niteflirt bill. (This is in contrast to a rinser, who demands her client spend the family's Christmas money on her instead of the wife and kids.)

So, my suggestion to you is to answer this question for yourself: what does your slave need to become a better partner and a better man? For example, you could order him to take massage classes, and to give his gf a massage at least once a week. Then part of your foreplay with him would be that he give you a massage before you beat his ass, or whatever it is that you do.

See the whole picture, and let that be your guide.

_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to MasterS502)
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