RE: How to find the real deal

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

RE: How to find the real deal

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Mistress >> RE: How to find the real deal

Page: << < prev 1 [2]

Login

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

RE: How to find the real deal - 10/13/2013 6:32:33 AM

RedMagic1

Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline

Wow, Athena, you really enjoyed that. I'm going to be message board Nostradamus for a minute, and predict that within 12 months you will have a sub of your very own -- maybe online only, but still. That post fed something inside you, and I bet it gets hungrier!

_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to AthenaSurrenders)

Post #: 21

RE: How to find the real deal - 10/13/2013 6:59:25 AM

AthenaSurrenders

Posts: 3582
Joined: 3/15/2012
Status: offline

Yeh, it's just a pity that most of the most popular activities for male subs hold zero interest for me. I have to admit, I wouldn't mind a few lessons from Lady Pact for topping skills though.

_____________________________

Being your slave, what should I do but tend
Upon the hours and times of your desire?

(in reply to RedMagic1)

Post #: 22

RE: How to find the real deal - 10/13/2013 7:12:52 AM

DarkSteven

Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: lifeforme

thatthethigidontwat porni want this feelingof being chastitized foreva i feel like a girl u dont understand i want to be sexy

You're not quite getting what everyone else is telling you. Saying that WE don't understand is rich in irony.

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to lifeforme)

Post #: 23

RE: How to find the real deal - 10/13/2013 8:11:12 AM

RedMagic1

Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: lifeforme
i want to be sexy

I think this drives quite a bit of submissive desire, by both men and women. There are a lot of people in kink who feel marginalized, or straight-up ugly -- at least that's what they hear from society. And they wish someone would just take their body and ravish them. Treat them as a sexual being for once in their life.

Chastity is especially related to this. I am no longer alone in my sexuality. Every pang of desire I feel is now connected to another person also. My sexuality has a purpose now; it longer is a torture device inside my body that just makes me feel more separate from other people.

Anyway, lifeforme, I hope you find someone who will pay attention to you. You sound as though you are in a lot of pain.

_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to lifeforme)

Post #: 24

RE: How to find the real deal - 10/13/2013 9:59:35 AM

TigressLily

Posts: 436
Status: offline

I would venture that your average male wants to be treated like a sex object by women, s-type or not. Vanilla wives know full well how much it hurts their husbands to cut them off, lack of physical intimacy notwithstanding. It causes an emotional wounding. Which isn't to say those same husbands didn't bring a lot of that upon themselves for being insensitive pricks.

quote:

ORIGINAL: RedMagic1

quote:

ORIGINAL: lifeforme

i want to be sexy

.... Treat them as a sexual being for once in their life.

Chastity is especially related to this.
<snip>

Ironically, there are men who are self-enforcing the wear of chastity devices, and very much alone while doing so. In some instances, what gets them started is guilt associated with what they consider to be excessive masturbation. They want someone else to take over controlling/limiting the whats, whens, wheres, hows & whys of their orgasms, denied and/or ruined orgasms. As for who? A Keyholder Mistress.

What so many of these subs, including you OP as a sissysub, fail to realize is that what drives them is not what interests the vast majority of women, not even (non-service-providing) Dommes. Yes, your service-providing, fee-charging Domme is often your only viable option.

Our lives do not revolve around what state your cock is in or how gaping your *ss is (as posted in your original avatar pic). I enjoy Ass Play, but I would much prefer a sub who isn't already broken in. Why? Because then I get cheated out of the fun of going through that process from start to finish. Anal sluts do not interest me. Male slut/whores of any type turn me off.

_____________________________

That Orbed Maiden with White Fire Layden
Whom Mortals Shall Call the Moon ~ Lord Byron
She Moves in Mysterious Ways . . . On Your Knees, Boy. ~ U2

(in reply to RedMagic1)

Post #: 25

RE: How to find the real deal - 10/13/2013 11:54:45 AM

NiceButMeanGirl

Posts: 2756
Joined: 11/4/2011
From: Bellingham, WA U.S.A.
Status: offline

Along with what everyone else here has said, this looks like the OP is presenting a thinly-veiled personal ad, which belongs HERE and not on the message boards.

NBMG

_____________________________

I'm now SweetlySadistic1 on CollarSpace. NBMG is an old profile, please see my new one.

(in reply to lifeforme)

Post #: 26

RE: How to find the real deal - 10/13/2013 12:32:28 PM

RedMagic1

Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: TigressLily
Ironically, there are men who are self-enforcing the wear of chastity devices, and very much alone while doing so. In some instances, what gets them started is guilt associated with what they consider to be excessive masturbation. They want someone else to take over controlling/limiting the whats, whens, wheres, hows & whys of their orgasms, denied and/or ruined orgasms. As for who? A Keyholder Mistress.

Here's a riddle. Why do you think that is so common among men, and not among women? Or, more extreme, why is there a significant percentage of men with castration fantasies, but almost no women with clitoridectomy fantasies? The "irony" there is even more dramatic, because there are several countries in the world where breasts are "ironed" and clitorises are removed, but almost no place in the world sanctions cutting a man's balls off. You always want what you can't have????

I've got my own ideas, and I said some of them in the previous post. But the OP doesn't seem strange or out-there to me; his situation seems like a natural consequence of loneliness when combined with supersaturation of pornography.

_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to TigressLily)

Post #: 27

RE: How to find the real deal - 10/13/2013 12:50:35 PM

MissOldBroad

Posts: 6
Joined: 9/18/2013
Status: offline

I would like to offer my .02

The OP stated in one of his post that he "feels like a girl". Just how does that feel? Speaking as a Transwoman, I never felt like a girl. I knew I was different and that being a male was not me. But to feel like a girl? I wasnt a girl so how could I know what the difference was.

Now to address the "Hormon" thing. 1. it is spelled hormone. 2. They are prescribed medications (note they are medications!!) 3. YOu have to be under a doctors supervision while on this therapy. 4. They have to be carefully monitored to remain safe. If you decide to go online and buy this medication and administer it to yourself, you run the risk of Deep Vein Throbosis (DVT) this isnt something like the common cold, it is a life threatening condition (if you dont understand that 'you could die'). 5. Estrogen itself isn't all that is involved, a testosterone blocker is also needed. This is normally spirolactone. It is a blood pressure medication that has a side effect of blocking "T". Abuse of this can cause Hypo-tensive disorder (that is extremely low blood pressure) Which too can prove fatal.

I did not need someone else to do this for me. I was strong in my conviction to be who I felt I was and did it myself. I got a hold of (at that time) Harry Benjamin Standards of Care and followed it to the letter. Now it is call WPATH (sorry dont know what it stands for). I got medial supervision and am safely changing my body to match my personal vision of who i am, NOT what I feel.

No Dominate worth their weight in salt will take you down this life altering road that can prove fatal just to satisfy your fetish desires. These changes in most cases are for life. The changes are not overnight. If you want to "feel like a girl" get some breast forms and throw on some panties and stocking and have at it.

Thank you all for letting me rant for a bit. If I made the OP aware of the dangers then I have accomplished my task.

(in reply to NiceButMeanGirl)

Post #: 28

RE: How to find the real deal - 10/13/2013 12:54:07 PM

AthenaSurrenders

Posts: 3582
Joined: 3/15/2012
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MissOldBroad

Thank you all for letting me rant for a bit. If I made the OP aware of the dangers then I have accomplished my task.

It was an excellent and informative rant. Sadly I suspect that, having failed to find someone to act out his fantasies, to OP has lost interest in this thread.

_____________________________

Being your slave, what should I do but tend
Upon the hours and times of your desire?

(in reply to MissOldBroad)

Post #: 29

RE: How to find the real deal - 10/13/2013 1:23:13 PM

TigressLily

Posts: 436
Status: offline

Dammit, you couldn't ask a simple question, could you?

quote:

ORIGINAL: RedMagic1

Here's a riddle. Why do you think that is so common among men, and not among women? Or, more extreme, why is there a significant percentage of men with castration fantasies....

... his situation seems like a natural consequence of loneliness when combined with supersaturation of pornography.

1. Overall, I believe more males are genitally fixated than females are, certainly on their own organs. Sure, we deal with menstruation cycles, but that's not the same thing.

2. In general, males are more sex-obsessed than females are, although that's open for debate. We tend to romanticize more, I think.

3. Males usually masturbate more frequently than females do and start doing so at an earlier age. Females often don't learn about female orgasms until they've partnered up, or much later in their youth. Listen, we don't have balls that get heavy. Most of us don't get wet dreams, at least not the ejaculatory kind.

4. Apparently, there is a segment of males who feel their masturbatory impulse control is out of hand [no pun intended].

5. As for castration fantasies, I don't believe chastity applies to those. Sissification does. There are numerous reasons why a male might want to get feminized, too many for me to go into here, and then there's the tying in [again, no pun intended] of CBT with pseudo-castration when it becomes an injurious practice.

6. In terms of less extreme crossdressing, this doesn't entail imaginary castration as much as wanting the best of both worlds. Keeping the penis along with passing for a girl. I'm no authority on that since I don't care for sissification or crossdressing.

Being pornography-driven doesn't bring out much sympathy in me. OP isn't asking for loving companionship--he wants to be used sexually. If he has a sex addiction, he needs to get professional help and a handle on it, not get his addiction fed. I'll bet you he doesn't complete the tasks Athena assigned him because he's not looking for D/s; he's desperate to get Topped instead.

Btw Athena, I thoroughly agree with Red, you have a knack for Mistressing. A natural talent which you should develop or find expression for more often.

_____________________________

That Orbed Maiden with White Fire Layden
Whom Mortals Shall Call the Moon ~ Lord Byron
She Moves in Mysterious Ways . . . On Your Knees, Boy. ~ U2

(in reply to RedMagic1)

Post #: 30

RE: How to find the real deal - 10/13/2013 3:33:31 PM

seekingOwnertoo

Posts: 1323
Joined: 8/1/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

The problem is that the women here want men to have dinner with, go to movies with, and have conversations with. If they like you enough, they'll indulge your fantasies.

First, make sure they enjoy talking with you and being with you.

Hmm, my fantasy is that one or two of them would go to dinner with me, and have conversations.

_____________________________

Got my second paddle! Finally! :-)

Heck I had one in 2010 .. now in 2013 another! Yes you can say, i am just a gifted slow learner!

(in reply to DarkSteven)

Post #: 31

RE: How to find the real deal - 10/16/2013 12:04:58 PM

razorbacksub

Posts: 4
Joined: 10/16/2013
Status: offline

It can be tough. Sometimes it's hard to explain what makes someone the real deal or not. Experience maybe. For me, when you find it, you know you have had it.

(in reply to AthenaSurrenders)

Post #: 32

RE: How to find the real deal - 10/16/2013 7:45:01 PM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline

If you really feel that you ought to be female, then that's gender dysmorphia and you need to start by seeing an experienced therapist.

You need to be diagnosed properly before a doctor will prescribe hormonal therapy. Dommes aren't able to prescribe medication. Nor is a domme going to commit to ten years and tens of thousands of dollars for gender reassignment surgery.

If this is what you need, then you need to do it for yourself. See a doctor, see a psychologist. Call your local LBGT group for references.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!

(in reply to razorbacksub)

Post #: 33

RE: How to find the real deal - 10/17/2013 2:51:45 AM

MissKittyDeVine

Posts: 1054
Joined: 9/24/2011
Status: offline

All I'm seeing is me me me me me wank wank me me me. Repeat ad infinitum.

_____________________________

Sanity is overrated. Live la vida loca

(in reply to DesFIP)

Post #: 34

RE: How to find the real deal - 10/17/2013 3:12:29 AM

Lesplay4

Posts: 4
Joined: 10/11/2013
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MissKittyDeVine

All I'm seeing is me me me me me wank wank me me me. Repeat ad infinitum.

There's an awful lot of it about.

I've enjoyed reading the thread and watching others deal with attention-seekers. Rather like watching a work out video and not actually doing the work yourself.

(in reply to MissKittyDeVine)

Post #: 35

RE: How to find the real deal - 10/17/2013 3:49:45 AM

ChatteParfaitt

Posts: 6562
Joined: 3/22/2011
From: The t'aint of the Midwest -- Indiana
Status: offline

Great rant. In case I haven't said it before, welcome to the discussion side. I've been enjoying your insights and valuable perspective.

_____________________________

(in reply to MissOldBroad)

Post #: 36

RE: How to find the real deal - 10/17/2013 6:26:47 AM

DarkSteven

Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MissKittyDeVine

All I'm seeing is me me me me me wank wank me me me. Repeat ad infinitum.

If you were a real deal Domme, you would have looked deeper.

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to MissKittyDeVine)

Post #: 37

RE: How to find the real deal - 10/20/2013 12:50:59 PM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lesplay4
I've enjoyed reading the thread and watching others deal with attention-seekers. Rather like watching a work out video and not actually doing the work yourself.

Now this is clever! Thankfully I wasn't drinking anything when I read it.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!

(in reply to Lesplay4)

Post #: 38

RE: How to find the real deal - 10/20/2013 5:54:54 PM

SpoiledDommeGiGi

Posts: 4
Joined: 10/10/2013
Status: offline

Great advice... I myself learned somethings as well.

_____________________________

☆ Supreme Spoiled Goddess ☆
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Yahoo IM thespoiledgoddess
♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥
SKYPE thespoiledgoddess
♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

(in reply to AthenaSurrenders)

Post #: 39

Page: << < prev 1 [2]

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Mistress >> RE: How to find the real deal

Page: << < prev 1 [2]

Jump to:

New Messages	No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages	Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages	Locked w/o New Messages

Post New Thread

Reply to Message

Post New Poll

Submit Vote

Delete My Own Post

Delete My Own Thread

Rate Posts

Collarchat.com © 2025

Terms of Service

0.109