Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

Pissed at Dom


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Submissive >> Pissed at Dom Page: [1] 2   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
Pissed at Dom - 7/2/2006 9:21:23 AM   
Littlepita


Posts: 1430
Joined: 10/6/2005
Status: offline 		This is a little rant and just meant to hog some CM space and get it off my chest!

What do you do when you're pissed at your dominant? Mine has decided I should do something today that I totally don't want to do, and I frankly think he is being insensitive to me about it. Normally he is beyond wonderful to me and I know I shouldn't feel pissy about this, but I DO!! He knows there is something wrong and has been very sweet and asking if there is anything he can do. But, I'm not going to come out and tell him that the "thing" he is having me do is the thing that is making me grouchy. I personally think he knows very well what it is and it purposely ignoring it. Men....Doms....is there is a difference. Not always!!

_____________________________

“I, with a deeper instinct, choose a man who compels my strength, who makes enormous demands on me, who does not doubt my courage or my toughness, who does not believe me naive or innocent, who has the courage to treat me like a woman.” – Anais Nin
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Pissed at Dom - 7/2/2006 9:27:30 AM   
bandit25


Posts: 3029
Joined: 6/18/2005
Status: offline 		Yup...but suck it up and get it done.  It won't be so bad and you'll wonder why you even worried about it.

(in reply to Littlepita)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Pissed at Dom - 7/2/2006 9:58:59 AM   
brightspot


Posts: 3052
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Littlepita

This is a little rant and just meant to hog some CM space and get it off my chest!

What do you do when you're pissed at your dominant? Mine has decided I should do something today that I totally don't want to do, and I frankly think he is being insensitive to me about it. Normally he is beyond wonderful to me and I know I shouldn't feel pissy about this, but I DO!! He knows there is something wrong and has been very sweet and asking if there is anything he can do. But, I'm not going to come out and tell him that the "thing" he is having me do is the thing that is making me grouchy. I personally think he knows very well what it is and it purposely ignoring it. Men....Doms....is there is a difference. Not always!!


IMO you should talk to him openly and honestly, even the part about knowing he knows. I am a strong supporter of communication, not side line crap going on because of not expressing yourself. If you start keeping things to yourself you may soon end up shutting down, running the risk you could fall into this pattern causing future damage to the relationship.
I support you getting it off your chest....with your Dom.
 
Good luck,
 
*Brightspot


_____________________________

"Comedy is NOT Pretty!" ~Peter Nelson

But..."May at Least One person have a sense of Humor!" ~KML.

http://360.yahoo.com/my_profile-TD4TwEw8crWS3GHFDcs_DK1rHmW6Dq_E;_ylt=Av2PfG9gH0wkQrMPivuMCivGAOJ3

(in reply to Littlepita)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Pissed at Dom - 7/2/2006 10:06:39 AM   
BitaTruble


Posts: 9779
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: Texas
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Littlepita

This is a little rant and just meant to hog some CM space and get it off my chest!

What do you do when you're pissed at your dominant? Mine has decided I should do something today that I totally don't want to do, and I frankly think he is being insensitive to me about it. Normally he is beyond wonderful to me and I know I shouldn't feel pissy about this, but I DO!! He knows there is something wrong and has been very sweet and asking if there is anything he can do. But, I'm not going to come out and tell him that the "thing" he is having me do is the thing that is making me grouchy. I personally think he knows very well what it is and it purposely ignoring it. Men....Doms....is there is a difference. Not always!!



Submission is easy when we're doing exactly what we want to do.. not so easy when we're doing something we dislike.

You're complaining that you 'totally don't want to do it'.. not that you can't do it and he's making you do it anyway knowing you're going to fail.

Suck it up and get it done... or talk to him about it. Being pissed is unproductive and can be damaging to your relationship. If you hold stuff in, something little is going to set you off one day and all the good times you've had up till then are going to be forgotten when you make a mountain out of a molehill.

Celeste



_____________________________

"Oh, so it's just like
Rock, paper, scissors."

He laughed. "You are the wisest woman I know."


(in reply to Littlepita)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Pissed at Dom - 7/2/2006 10:34:45 AM   
Littlepita


Posts: 1430
Joined: 10/6/2005
Status: offline 		Yeah, yeah! Well, he suggested that he do it instead and if that would be ok. I said, Yeah!!! I do love him!! Thanks everyone!

_____________________________

“I, with a deeper instinct, choose a man who compels my strength, who makes enormous demands on me, who does not doubt my courage or my toughness, who does not believe me naive or innocent, who has the courage to treat me like a woman.” – Anais Nin

(in reply to BitaTruble)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Pissed at Dom - 7/2/2006 10:36:17 AM   
ownedgirlie


Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Littlepita

This is a little rant and just meant to hog some CM space and get it off my chest!

What do you do when you're pissed at your dominant?


I tell him.  And then he tells me I'm not allowed to be angry at him :)  And then we dissect it.

quote:


Mine has decided I should do something today that I totally don't want to do, and I frankly think he is being insensitive to me about it.


And?  There may be reasons for it beyond your scope of vision.  That's why he's the dom  :)  Sensitivity is something bestowed out of kindness, but we are not entitled to it.
quote:


Normally he is beyond wonderful to me and I know I shouldn't feel pissy about this...

Then be grateful for how wonderful he has been, inviting you and your little one to live with him and taking care of you. 

quote:

He knows there is something wrong and has been very sweet and asking if there is anything he can do.

More reason to be grateful.  He is trying to remedy the problem.
quote:


But, I'm not going to come out and tell him that the "thing" he is having me do is the thing that is making me grouchy.

He wants you to do something, he is trying to resolve a problem, and you are responding by playing games.  As Celeste said, submitting is easy when we want everything that is required of us.  As Master says, "If it was easy, anyone could do it."   Submitting means doing what you're told, even if you don't want to.  It means trusting in his decisions, even if they seem skewed to you.  It means coming to him with your concerns, and ultimately obeying his final word.
quote:


I personally think he knows very well what it is and it purposely ignoring it.

He may be waiting very patiently for you to come to him and be open and honest about your concerns.  This may be his way of teaching you to do so. 

I know it can be frustrating, and difficult, and you just want to stomp your feet!  If it helps, remember how much you missed him when he was away, be grateful that he is home and even giving you instructions (the alternative would be horrible), and let him know your concerns.  If he still wants you to do it, then say no more about it and do it.

Edited:  Oh.  Well you just posted while I was typing.  So....never mind!

< Message edited by ownedgirlie -- 7/2/2006 10:37:03 AM >

(in reply to Littlepita)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Pissed at Dom - 7/2/2006 10:53:50 AM   
Bearlee


Posts: 2311
Joined: 10/25/2004
From: South Central CO
Status: offline 		A few weeks ago, someone started a similar thread.  I say 'similar' because the OP was trying to accomplish the request and was finding it difficult to complete; but she had started it.  I found many of the posts there very helpful and interesting...some not so much; but all in all good food for thought:

http://www.collarchat.com/m_429087/mpage_1/key_/tm.htm

I agree "communication is imperative."  Sometimes the Dom requests difficult things for a reason…sometimes maybe he just didn’t want to do it either, but had no idea you may have an aversion to it yourself.
 
edited to add:
I see your Dom rescinded his request…I hope you're good with that.

(in reply to Littlepita)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Pissed at Dom - 7/2/2006 11:36:57 AM   
MstrssPassion


Posts: 2444
Joined: 1/1/2004
From: West Palm Beach, FL
Status: offline 		well since you have not mentioned what it is that he is having you do I really have no comment.

All I can say is that any time you start feeling pissy about your relationship with him remember the days when you had that little meter on your signature line that counted down the days until you two were together.



_____________________________

MstrssPassion


(in reply to Littlepita)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Pissed at Dom - 7/2/2006 12:15:14 PM   
Curiossdragnlily


Posts: 105
Joined: 4/4/2006
Status: offline 		i am not going to say suck it up...Even though i would like to..lol...you say He know you don't like it...Are you sure?? Are you sure that this isn't something He is asking you to do for several reasons...Reasons known to Him and not you....Could talking to Him help clarify that??  There are things that Master asks me to do that i don't "want" to do....He has never and will never ask me to do something He knows i "can't" do..With "can't" being the operative word here...i may feel i "can't" but He has proven to me time and time again tht i "can" do many things i thought that i "couldn't"...i know He knows me better than i know myself....That is where your trust, respect, and communication come into play in the relationship....Good luck with it..
with respect,
lily, collared and owned slave of Master Curios
srn 308-692-331

(in reply to Littlepita)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Pissed at Dom - 7/2/2006 12:17:17 PM   
Curiossdragnlily


Posts: 105
Joined: 4/4/2006
Status: offline 		just a side note i forgot...i also have IHM days....i hate Master...lol....so take heart....it happens to us all....

with respect,
lily, collared and owned slave of Master Curios
srn 308-692-331

(in reply to Littlepita)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Pissed at Dom - 7/2/2006 1:31:05 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ownedgirlie

quote:

ORIGINAL: Littlepita

This is a little rant and just meant to hog some CM space and get it off my chest!

What do you do when you're pissed at your dominant?


I tell him.  And then he tells me I'm not allowed to be angry at him :)  And then we dissect it.

quote:


Mine has decided I should do something today that I totally don't want to do, and I frankly think he is being insensitive to me about it.


And?  There may be reasons for it beyond your scope of vision.  That's why he's the dom  :)  Sensitivity is something bestowed out of kindness, but we are not entitled to it.
quote:


Normally he is beyond wonderful to me and I know I shouldn't feel pissy about this...

Then be grateful for how wonderful he has been, inviting you and your little one to live with him and taking care of you. 

quote:

He knows there is something wrong and has been very sweet and asking if there is anything he can do.

More reason to be grateful.  He is trying to remedy the problem.
quote:


But, I'm not going to come out and tell him that the "thing" he is having me do is the thing that is making me grouchy.

He wants you to do something, he is trying to resolve a problem, and you are responding by playing games.  As Celeste said, submitting is easy when we want everything that is required of us.  As Master says, "If it was easy, anyone could do it."   Submitting means doing what you're told, even if you don't want to.  It means trusting in his decisions, even if they seem skewed to you.  It means coming to him with your concerns, and ultimately obeying his final word.
quote:


I personally think he knows very well what it is and it purposely ignoring it.

He may be waiting very patiently for you to come to him and be open and honest about your concerns.  This may be his way of teaching you to do so. 

I know it can be frustrating, and difficult, and you just want to stomp your feet!  If it helps, remember how much you missed him when he was away, be grateful that he is home and even giving you instructions (the alternative would be horrible), and let him know your concerns.  If he still wants you to do it, then say no more about it and do it.

Edited:  Oh.  Well you just posted while I was typing.  So....never mind!

Not nevermind!!  Everything you said was completely valid and should be absolutely listened to.

I can't believe you flat out lied to your dom and then came onto the boards with your problems!  You totally know better!

This time might have worked out ok, but there WILL be another time.  What will you do then?


_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to ownedgirlie)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Pissed at Dom - 7/2/2006 5:02:13 PM   
CrappyDom


Posts: 1883
Joined: 4/11/2006
From: Sacramento
Status: offline 		Says nothing but arches his eyebrows and glares at her.

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Pissed at Dom - 7/2/2006 5:30:35 PM   
desertdancer


Posts: 1095
Joined: 5/12/2006
Status: offline 		Master has this totally annoying habit of making me tell him exactly what I am feeling at any given time that he asks, which is normally right at the time I am normally feeling at my worst, or most humiliated or pissy or frustrated, and though at that moment I HATE that he demands me tell him, later I am always glad that I have.  I am very blessed to have a Master who cares so much about what I am thinking and feeling and it sounds like you have one who cares a lot about what you think and feel too Pita.

I have to agree with the others who've posted before me, it's easy to submit to things we want to do, its MUCH harder to submit to doing things we don't want to do. Pita I think you want to please your Master and I think you want your master to find you pleasing, is dragging your feet over a task and acting pissy being pleasing to him?  When I have to do things I don't want to I often feel the wanting to pout, but I also feel this stronger need to make the one I am with proud and to be graceful to his eyes and pouting and being pissy isn't being graceful or pleasing.


good luck to you Pita, sometimes submission is a struggle, and mmm how much sweeter submission can be for feeling that struggle.

~dancer


_____________________________

* Shimmy Shimmy *

(in reply to CrappyDom)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Pissed at Dom - 7/2/2006 5:43:20 PM   
babysburnin


Posts: 421
Joined: 2/16/2006
Status: offline 		Now I'm curious...what was this "Task"?  I know it doesn't matter (and everyone else, don't pretend you don't want to know what has gotten Littlepita's "panties in wad".  He asked - it hurt you - he did it instead.  That says a lot....

_____________________________

-Babysburnin

"Love is, above all else, the gift of oneself."
- Jean Anouilh

"The highest proof of virtue is to possess boundless power without abusing it."
- Lord Macaulay

(in reply to Littlepita)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Pissed at Dom - 7/2/2006 6:42:18 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: CrappyDom
Says nothing but arches his eyebrows and glares at her.

The good glare or the bad glare?

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to CrappyDom)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Pissed at Dom - 7/2/2006 6:45:47 PM   
CrappyDom


Posts: 1883
Joined: 4/11/2006
From: Sacramento
Status: offline 		The one nobody wants to see.

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Pissed at Dom - 7/2/2006 6:46:44 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: CrappyDom
The one nobody wants to see.

WHy the glare then?

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to CrappyDom)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Pissed at Dom - 7/2/2006 6:47:51 PM   
desertdancer


Posts: 1095
Joined: 5/12/2006
Status: offline 		The glare sure scared me! And I wasnt even the one being glared at! * shivers*



_____________________________

* Shimmy Shimmy *

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Pissed at Dom - 7/2/2006 9:16:56 PM   
Taylore


Posts: 121
Joined: 6/19/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Littlepita

This is a little rant and just meant to hog some CM space and get it off my chest!

What do you do when you're pissed at your dominant? Mine has decided I should do something today that I totally don't want to do, and I frankly think he is being insensitive to me about it. Normally he is beyond wonderful to me and I know I shouldn't feel pissy about this, but I DO!! He knows there is something wrong and has been very sweet and asking if there is anything he can do. But, I'm not going to come out and tell him that the "thing" he is having me do is the thing that is making me grouchy. I personally think he knows very well what it is and it purposely ignoring it. Men....Doms....is there is a difference. Not always!!

This slave has to agree with bandit25. As said 'suck it up and get it done'
There are sometimes that Master has me do something that I just do not want to do, and he knows it; yet, I do it.
I have found that pouting, and getting angry will not get the job done, just prolong that agony that is felt within.

_____________________________

Taylore

(in reply to Littlepita)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Pissed at Dom - 7/2/2006 9:49:14 PM   
LadyHugs


Posts: 2299
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		Dear desertdancer, LuckyAlbatross, Ladies and Gentlemen;
 
I would be happy to pass out sunglasses as to 'cut out the glare' but, alas I cannot fit them through the screen and or the blindfolds to block the glare entirely.
 
Respectfully submitted with a bit of humor,
Lady Hugs

(in reply to desertdancer)
Profile   Post #: 20
Page:   [1] 2   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Submissive >> Pissed at Dom Page: [1] 2   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.078