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RE: novice seeks answers - 7/5/2006 5:54:16 PM

vmyeyes

Posts: 14
Joined: 7/2/2006
Status: offline

thank you every one for your answers has been really helpful

(in reply to KarbonCopy)

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RE: novice seeks answers - 7/8/2006 1:17:55 AM

LXIXs

Posts: 2
Joined: 5/13/2006
Status: offline

Hey, I don't think that's very fair.... you can only find so much about the life style on the internet without being unindated with porn sites, and bogged down with a lot of pop up windows that never go away. There comes a point when you really have to ask a person or persons about their experiences in order to get a well rounded scope of what it's all about. This girl is very very new to this. She didn't even know this lifestyle existed until about three weeks ago. I applaud those who have really taken the time to answer her. One of the things I've learned about any situation in life is that if you are going to subscribe to a certain docterine, etc, learn everything you can and keep yourself safe. Kudos, Vm, keep asking all your questions. Thirst for knowledge on any topic is a turn on.

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Post #: 22

RE: novice seeks answers - 7/8/2006 9:00:01 AM

thegunslinger

Posts: 81
Joined: 6/4/2006
From: Grand Rapids, Michigan
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: vmyeyes

What is the primary reason for having a sub? -a domme? What do you get out of it?
The primary reason I have a sub is because my girlfriend told me a while ago she likes submitting to men, and I told her I like dominating women.

What I get out of it is having someone who I can share open and extremely trusting relationship, along with someone to talk about kinky things I like doing, and someone to do those kinky things too.

What is usually expected of a sub that is accross the board an a common expections ?
The only thing across the board common is for the submissive to be submissive, and even then you have different degrees and rule breakers, SAMs, pain sluts, etc
What is your top and most important rule ?
My top important rule is use the safeword if you feel unsafe, if I can't trust a sub to do that, I can't play with them.
How detailed and extensive is your contract?
The contract between Dom and sub is as detailed as you want it to be, O/our contract details hard limits and service specifications, and comes to about three pages.
What criteria do you look for in a sub? A - domme?
Since I already have a sub, I'm not looking for one. If W/we ever decide we want someone to play with, I look for someone that is attractive to me, and it doesn't hurt if their attractive to my sub. And no pain sluts, SAMs, top from the bottomers.
Are your sub/domme relationships romantic above and beyond the Domme / sub dyanmic ?
I consider ours romantic, it's certainly intimate to say the least.
What is your most servere punishment ?
When rules have been severely broken, theres a large heavy wooden paddle that hangs in my room....
What is your most favorit eritic punishment ?
Anything to her with her ballgag in and her leash on
How long did you know your domme before you were collared ?
How long did you know your sub before you collared her ?
We will have known each other about two months when I collar her, today actually.

_____________________________

"The essence of domination is to take another's power and then use it for mutual pleasure." - John Warren

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Post #: 23

RE: novice seeks answers - 7/8/2006 11:21:08 AM

MistressSassy66

Posts: 1675
Joined: 11/5/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: vmyeyes

another question for every one ..... Does your friends an family know of your life style or do you keep it a quite only between you an the other person? the reason i ask is do i mention this to my friends an how will they react to it or do i keep it quite like dont ask dont tell kind a thing an how much of your life style affects you out side like work, friends, family ? how does this all work its like i felt like when i was first comming out the closet being a lesbian an that in its self is a life style. do i treat this the same or cuz i dont want to be ashamed of who i am becoming an what i am finding along the way that i like. its like just so confusing,,,,, please inlighten me its not that i would ever share the stuff thats behind closed doors but how much of this life style will affect my life out side the home.....

I can relate to coming out as a Lesbian.It was easier to come out to My family about My sexual preference than the fact W/we live in a BDSM type relationship.
My family still has no clue.All My friends on the other hand know about the Dungeon some have even helped build the Dungeon up(jail cell,chains,hooks etc..).
They have no interest in playing in the Dungeon they just think its cool to look at,I have to laugh when they first see it...Big wide eyes...deer in headlights kind of thing.

I think to hide who you are is a horrible idea...been there.
I feel hiding how I feel about bishop is like I am ashamed of her or U/us being together.
While I dont tell the family about My lifestyle,I dont hide that I am Domme.
I have to think some are even a bit jealous when they see bishop taking good care of Me(makes sure coffee cup is full,gets My plate,sits on the floor next to My feet).bishop also sees the envy and it makes her proud to show off how "thoughtful" she is.

Last point...How much it effects your life is completely up to you.

_____________________________

Mistress Sassy

http://www.mistresssassy.com

In the Immortal Words of Bob....Fuck the dumb shit.

"I love you not only for what you are,But for what I am when I'm with you."- Opening line from a poem by Roy Croft

(in reply to vmyeyes)

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Post #: 24

RE: novice seeks answers - 7/9/2006 6:25:03 AM

vmyeyes

Posts: 14
Joined: 7/2/2006
Status: offline

if you told your domme to shut up 3 times what would your domme do to you??????? i told my trainer that 3 times and she is going to cane me 3 times do you think thats fair????

(in reply to KarbonCopy)

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Post #: 25

RE: novice seeks answers - 7/9/2006 12:55:42 PM

kc692

Posts: 3701
Joined: 3/24/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: vmyeyes

if you told your domme to shut up 3 times what would your domme do to you??????? i told my trainer that 3 times and she is going to cane me 3 times do you think thats fair????

Nope, I'd do it many more times for you posting that in this forum, consider yourself lucky. With some of us, you wouldn't have uttered it a second time....

_____________________________

Anyone can overpower; not many can INSPIRE.....

This is only MY opinion. If it's not yours, let's agree in advance to agree to disagree, OR, you can just get the fuck over what I had to say:)

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Post #: 26

RE: novice seeks answers - 7/9/2006 3:13:13 PM

vmyeyes

Posts: 14
Joined: 7/2/2006
Status: offline

see i wasnt sure i was still thinking on our friendship level i had no clue that from that moment on everything 24/7 is now sub an domme now i know where i am supposed to be thinking as i understand ....

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Post #: 27

RE: novice seeks answers - 7/9/2006 4:25:10 PM

LXIXs

Posts: 2
Joined: 5/13/2006
Status: offline

What would you have done, Mistress Corrupted? After the first utterment, I mean?

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Post #: 28

RE: novice seeks answers - 7/12/2006 9:03:31 PM

vmyeyes

Posts: 14
Joined: 7/2/2006
Status: offline

i am asking all subs what do you do when your feeling worn out? like you just want to curl up an cry ..................

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Post #: 29

RE: novice seeks answers - 7/13/2006 12:59:32 AM

crouchingtigress

Posts: 4387
Joined: 3/19/2006
From: Maui
Status: offline

laffs...yeah but in his defense what if he was no where near a computer when he posted his post??

quote:

ORIGINAL: KarbonCopy

<image deleted>

sorry had to try this one out. Couldn't resist.

< Message edited by ModeratorEleven -- 7/13/2006 12:17:26 PM >

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Service slut, durable plaything, and ponypenquincatdogpig, to Lee Harrington

This is him

"Its none of my buisness what other people think of me."

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Post #: 30

RE: novice seeks answers - 7/13/2006 1:01:37 AM

crouchingtigress

Posts: 4387
Joined: 3/19/2006
From: Maui
Status: offline

i dont think they are dumb questions....i was just responding to the joke, i am glad you are finding the answer you seek....i am too lazy to answer so many questions myself...but i really am glad other people arent....

_____________________________

Service slut, durable plaything, and ponypenquincatdogpig, to Lee Harrington

This is him

"Its none of my buisness what other people think of me."

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RE: novice seeks answers - 7/13/2006 7:20:06 AM

kc692

Posts: 3701
Joined: 3/24/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: crouchingtigress

laffs...yeah but in his defense what if he was no where near a computer when he posted his post??

quote:

ORIGINAL: KarbonCopy

<image deleted>

sorry had to try this one out. Couldn't resist.

That was a joke, right? Just making sure, laffs, that he might not be near a computer when he posted?

< Message edited by ModeratorEleven -- 7/13/2006 12:17:45 PM >

_____________________________

Anyone can overpower; not many can INSPIRE.....

This is only MY opinion. If it's not yours, let's agree in advance to agree to disagree, OR, you can just get the fuck over what I had to say:)

(in reply to crouchingtigress)

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Post #: 32

RE: novice seeks answers - 7/13/2006 8:49:18 AM

yourMissTress

Posts: 1665
Joined: 6/14/2005
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: vmyeyes

What is the primary reason for having a sub? -a domme?

My primary reason for having a sub is that being a Dominant woman, a submissive is My natural match or mate. The relationship just works better for Me when the roles are clearly defined and understood.

quote:

What do you get out of it?

We have a mutually satisfying relationship.

quote:

What is usually expected of a sub that is accross the board an a common expections ?

I would have to say that there are no usual, across the board, or common expectations that are tangible. I do believe that the majority of Dominants expect respect, honesty, and devotion from their submissive. Any more than that is going to be dependent on the individual relationship.

quote:

What is your top and most important rule ?

Honesty at all times.

quote:

How detailed and extensive is your contract?

I don't use contracts. Never have, doubtfully ever will.

quote:

What criteria do you look for in a sub?

For Me, a sub must be honest, daring, willing, openminded, and have a good sense of humor.

quote:

Are your sub/domme relationships romantic above and beyond the Domme / sub dyanmic ?

Not all of them, because I have some play partners that I am not romantic with. But with My apb, our relationship though based in D/s has grown and continues to grow. We will always be MissTress and apb, but we are also lovers, partners, friends.

quote:

What is your most servere punishment ?

That is different for each submissive.

quote:

What is your most favorit eritic punishment ?

I have no favorite punishment. Punishment is not fun for Me at all. It means that not only has My sub disobeyed Me, but it reflects a deeper issue in the relationship. IMO punishment is not erotic.

quote:

How long did you know your sub before you collared her ?

I met her 6 weeks before she was collared to Me. I wouldn't suggest moving that fast to anyone else, but sometimes things just fall into place at a faster pace.

_____________________________

Tress

"If you have to tell people that you are a lady, you are not." My Grandmother

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Post #: 33