quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

But not everyone does walk in cold and goes about making huge and frequent mistakes.

quote:

ORIGINAL: iaminigo

quote:

ORIGINAL: SylvereApLeanan

In the context of this discussion, "read the FAQ" is a valid response. You may not like it, but that does not make it less valid. Get over it.

We're not discussing valid responses. We're discussing why newbies don't stick around. I contend responses that require someone to "get over it" are exactly why the topic exists, and aren't really helpful. You're just driving people off. Is that your intent?

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ORIGINAL: ExiledTyrant

Can we just pop a new section in between "intro and positive" entitled "because you're new" sticky the most frequent crap and hand out whips n chairs to prepare them for the other forums?

Exiled

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ORIGINAL: DesFIP

quote:

ORIGINAL: SeekingTrinity

This is an internet forum and expecting people to read and learn the rules BEFORE sampling what it's like is ridiculous. If someone makes one mistake on their first post, and everyone jumps on them, most will bounce and move on elsewhere. That's just how internet traffic works.

But not everyone does walk in cold and goes about making huge and frequent mistakes.

If I have to go to a cocktail party (God forbid) I don't walk in saying the Democrats or Republicans are absolute idiots who ought to be shot. For all I know, the host has invited his rabidly Conservative boss and I'll get him in trouble.

I use cocktail party talk; weather, sports, who do we know in common until I have gotten a sense of what does and doesn't work in this group.

Same with every internet forum I've been in. Old rose forums at gardenweb or a group at fetlife, each group has its own personality. And as the newcomer, it's my responsibility to fit in. It is not the group's responsibility to change to adapt to me.

Junior year of high school I entered a newly desegregated school. They had a quota of African Americans and Jews and most of these girls were from segregated neighborhoods where they hadn't ever met any of us. I did not become one of the 'popular' girls but I became friendly with almost all of them. I even got along with the scary ones. And I'm an introvert with social anxiety. I adapted well because I needed to. I used appropriate coping skills, like listening to what they talked about and then joining in.

And then I went to a carrel in the back room of the library to regroup and get more energy.

quote:

ORIGINAL: SeekingTrinity

quote:

ORIGINAL: iaminigo

Expecting people to read the ToS and CoC before making their first post is kinda silly. Do you read the software license agreements on the apps you install?

True, but ignorance of the law is not a valid excuse for breaking the law. I'll be honest in saying that I haven't bothered reading the ORS (Oregon Revised Statute). But just because I haven't bothered to read it does not mean that the various police agencies Id potentially face if I break a rule is going to buy my "gee, Officer...I didn't know that <fill in the blank> was illegal" defense as I try to talk my way out of a possible ticket.

They post the TOS here for a reason. If you are not inclined to read it before you post, you should still be held to the same standard as those who do bother reading it. Ignorance, laziness, or "it just doesn't apply to me because I'm super special" isn't an excuse.

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ORIGINAL: SylvereApLeanan

quote:

ORIGINAL: iaminigo

quote:

ORIGINAL: SylvereApLeanan

In the context of this discussion, "read the FAQ" is a valid response. You may not like it, but that does not make it less valid. Get over it.

We're not discussing valid responses. We're discussing why newbies don't stick around. I contend responses that require someone to "get over it" are exactly why the topic exists, and aren't really helpful. You're just driving people off. Is that your intent?

Actually, we are discussing how to retain newbies, which includes examining how regulars respond to them because that is a factor in how well newcomers assimilate into the culture of CollarChat. If forum regulars are "driving people off" as you claim, then evaluating the responses given by regulars is an important piece of data that must be examined.

To be blunt, I find your claim that regulars such as me are driving people off to be specious at best. From your previous posts, it seems you would like to absolve newcomers of any personal responsibility for how they are received and that is as far from a realistic position as it is possible to take. You have already demonstrated that your logic skills are lacking so, at this point, any further rebuttal on your part is futile because you are working from a flawed premise.

Frankly, I don't mind when some newbies are "driven off" because their posts demonstrate they are incapable of making what I consider to be a valuable contribution to the forum. That doesn't mean I agree with everyone who makes a valuable contribution. Often, I find myself in disagreement with them. But I recognize the value in that disagreement and I can respect it. Not everyone has the capacity to make that level of contribution and I don't consider it a loss if they leave.

quote:

ORIGINAL: tj444
no I am not missing the point.. that is why I said it should cut down on some of the duplicate threads, not all.. I know for myself, I search the internet all the time so searching is almost automatic with me when I want to find some info.. just on here I stopped cuz of the frustration factor.. I am sure there are many people that don't actually do much searching for anything on the internet (so wouldn't here either), but then I don't spend any time/energy on FB or relying on spammy emails for my information..

Now I just save the link to interesting/iinformative threads I stumble upon, that way I don't have to search for it again..

Fair enough. I'll admit I'm multitasking today so I may not have read your post as thoroughly as I should have. My bad!

Here's a tip you might like - it's possible to use Google to find threads on CollarChat if you plug in "collarme" as one of the keywords. I'm not sure if it's more or less reliable than the search feature here, but it can be done. The solution that works best for me is to click Subscribe on threads I want to find later.

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ORIGINAL: iaminigo
I for one don't appreciate you driving off people based on your judgement of their level of contribution. I like to make my own judgment. I think abstaining from engaging with posts that you personally don't like might help retain new posters, like the thread title says. Nobody made you a "cop" to drive off undesirables.

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ORIGINAL: SylvereApLeanan

quote:

ORIGINAL: iaminigo
I for one don't appreciate you driving off people based on your judgement of their level of contribution. I like to make my own judgment. I think abstaining from engaging with posts that you personally don't like might help retain new posters, like the thread title says. Nobody made you a "cop" to drive off undesirables.

Again, you argue from a flawed premise. You assume that I am responsible for running people off. I refute that assessment because I know I'm one of the less vocal of the regular posters. I rarely get on a soapbox and my posts are generally short, to the point, and focus on facts and issues presented in other posts rather than what may or may not be on a poster's profile or journal.

I know other people look at the profile of a person posting to get a better sense of who they are and where their point of view is coming from, but I seldom do. If I'm running people off, which I seriously doubt, I should get a medal for awesomeness because I must have some mad skills.

As for whether or not you appreciate how I conduct myself, I don't really care. You are no more a mod than I am and I don't have to conform to your views of how the forum should be run. As long as I abide by the TOS and the Guidelines - which you maintain it is not important to read before posting - then I may speak as I wish. If people are run off by that, I don't care because they probably aren't going to make much of a contribution anyway.

That being said, I've already volunteered to be one of the people to act as welcome wagon/mentor/forum guide who holds hands and helps new people learn their way around and get acclimated so they feel welcome and will be more inclined to stick around. I don't see you doing that. All I see is you whining about "teh ebil clik ov meenies, bawwww!" Put your money where your mouth is or STFU.

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ORIGINAL: TNDommeK

There is no clique!

Pfft. You're one of the cliquiest bitches here. (Kidding! )

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ORIGINAL: iaminigo
I'm welcoming people in the Intros forum. The rest of your post is a troll, and I'm not biting.

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ORIGINAL: DesFIP

I actually disagree with your thought that we should wait several posts before telling a new poster that using text speak gets him ignored and that he'll have better luck if he acts as though he thinks we're people he wants to interact with instead of otherwise. Because those 6 posts could be three weeks by which time he'll then be shocked to be asked not to, saying obviously nobody minds or they would have told him in the beginning.

Many people have overinflated sense of their own importance and cannot accept any disagreement online. If you use soft soap, they'll ignore the message underneath. If you're straight forward, they'll claim ad hominem attacks.

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ORIGINAL: cloudboy
Let me just say too, that as a poster I don't ever report anyone, I like to take on my targets directly and defend my own self. The only thing I would report is posting that might hurt someone out there in the real world.