quote:

ORIGINAL: jlf1961

To give your kids chores?

I have not been able to verify it, so I dont swear it is gospel, but a member of a local group I belong to swears that CPS got a complaint because she was making her kid do chores.

She is a single mother who is living with her parents, who own a horse operation, breeding, training and boarding.

According to her, she was told that having him help feed and muck stalls is considered child abuse as it violates child labor laws.

If this is true, I have a damn good idea what is wrong with kids today besides the fact parents are afraid to discipline them.

quote:

ORIGINAL: jlf1961

So when I was growing up and the family was raising cattle as well as selling hay, and I had horses, the fact that I got up every morning to feed livestock, muck stables before going to school, then coming home and taking care of my horses, and putting hay out for the cattle, I was actually working?

My mom and dad came from farm families, they did the same stuff when they were kids, and it was called chores.

May I say that the US and its child welfare system has gone off the deep end and have totally fucked up kids of the present generation and all future generations.

Chores equal allowance, I earned extra money from selling calves I raised for 4h and FFA as well as selling colts.

Lord you can aim a doomsday asteroid at the US, we have FUBARed our children.

quote:

ORIGINAL: ChatteParfaitt

It becomes child abuse when children are expected to function like adults.

There are families that don't treat their children well. From an early age I was expected to come straight home from school, take care of household chores, cook dinner, all while watching my younger sisters. My father worked during the day, my mother during the evening, so I had to get home and take over so she could go to work.

Weekends were not much better, my mother put us to work and if she couldn't find anything to do inside we were sent outside to do yardwork or whatever she could come up with. I also helped my father with his projects, by 10 I was helping him fix cars, remodel the house. By 12 I was taking roofing shingles up a ladder for the 3 car garage he built. I ironed by father's work shirts, 12 a week, long sleeved with french cuffs. I also worked for his business.

The emotional and physical abuse that went with this regime was horrendous. For instance, we were punished for tasks that we're perfectly completed. That you were 8 years old and had never done it before wasn't considered an excuse.

Yes, I learned a lot. I knew how to cook, clean, do laundry, go grocery shopping, deal with the yard, paint a house, etc. But I literally had no childhood.

My own children were expected to do chores around the house, to do their own laundry, and in general to help out, though I made sure they were given age appropriate tasks. I went out of my way to make sure helping out was a fun game. It's been my experience kids like to help if you treat them right.

Having a child help with the family business in this day and age opens up a huge can of worms. Really I wouldn't recommend it. Of course they should be given age appropriate tasks around the house that is tied into an allowance.

If special tasks come up, like cleaning the car, they should be taught (yes, that's right taught) how to negotiate what the task involves and how much they should get paid.

quote:

ORIGINAL: kiwisub12

There is a family in Arkansas, where the mother pops out another kids every year. That really isn't the issue, since they appear to have enough money to afford it. The issue as I see is, is that every new baby is "assigned" to an older child to "care" for.

Basically, as I see it, the mother completely abrogates her child rearing responsibilities to her to her other children so she can concentrate on getting pregnant again.
The older kids are involuntary parents. Their childhood is taken from them by their parents, who apparently feel no shame with this arrangement.
Have as many kids as you want, but the parent should be responsible for raising them.