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RE: Losing a pet - 1/29/2014 6:15:59 PM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
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Both you and your surviving dog are grieving. Both of you need to do so. Spend as much time as possible petting him. Both of you need the physical contact.

And if there was a hole in the fence that allowed the dog to escape, get it repaired as quickly as possible. In the meantime, put the dog on a run.

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Post #: 21

RE: Losing a pet - 1/29/2014 6:44:18 PM

smileforme50

Posts: 1623
Joined: 1/24/2013
From: DelaWHERE(?)
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I am so sorry for your loss. Although I have never lost a pet due to such a sudden traumatic episode, I have had to put many cats and dogs to sleep. For me, what I found most surprising was that the emotional experience was actually unique for each pet. I lost a dog last March, and as a bit of therapy, I wrote the following in my CM journal:

The Storyteller's Creed

I believe that imagination is stronger than knowledge.
That myth is more potent than history.
That dreams are more powerful than facts.
That hope always triumphs over experience.
That laughter is the only cure for grief.
And I believe that love is stronger than death.

--Robert Fulghum

I've always enjoyed Fulghum's writing. It's so simple and so true. His works are just that....stories. Not stories he writes....but stories he tells. By that I mean that he talks of true events. Very little of it is made up. He calls his books "a written report of what goes on in my head and life." with some changes to some names and fact "to protect those who are either innocent or crabby or both."

I pulled this book off my shelf this morning because I remembered the Storyteller's Creed. The last two lines in it rang very true for me this past week. I lost a dear loved one earlier this week, but people who loved her and I got through it by laughter. We told and retold all the stories about her. Our eyes were moist, but it was from laughter....not grief. And even though she is now gone, we all will continue to love her, because love is indeed stronger than death.

I know that right now it is difficult to laugh or feel happy, but for me, that has always been one of the best ways to deal with such a loss. Think about the good memories you have for this dog and try to smile about those memories. Please remember the last two lines of the Storyteller's Creed: "Laughter is the only cure for grief.....and love is stronger than death".

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“Give it to me!” she yelled
“I’m so fucking wet! Give it to me now!”

She could scream all she wanted…..I was keeping the umbrella.

(in reply to DesFIP)

Post #: 22

RE: Losing a pet - 1/30/2014 4:22:52 AM

ThePrincessKali

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Joined: 9/19/2012
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I'm so sorry you had to see that. It sounds terrible. We always had cats when I was growing up and had to witness them die eventually. I live on the opposite coast as my family. One of our cats passed and my family didn't tell me bc I was going through a though time in my personal life. They then never found the "right moment." So six months later I was visiting for Christmas calling out to my cat and finally they told me he had died over the summer. My heart was broken. Other than losing a human family member, it's the most painful thing I've ever dealt with. My current dog went through a phase where he would chew on chords so I had every chord stapled to the wall so they weren't exposed to him. One day he managed to pull one off, chewed through it, and electrocuted himself. He was completely stiff for a few minutes and I rushed him to the vet. Thank God he came to in the car and the vet ran tests on him and he was ok. It was probably the most terrifying moment of my life. I know the pain probably seems unbearable but it will pass eventually. You will reach a point where you can think of her and smile remembering the memories you had but it will take time. My thoughts are with you.

(in reply to DarkSteven)

Post #: 23

RE: Losing a pet - 1/30/2014 5:07:20 AM

ChatteParfaitt

Posts: 6562
Joined: 3/22/2011
From: The t'aint of the Midwest -- Indiana
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Both people and animals can grieve. When my Maine Coon died, he was like Trilby's mother. Trilby stressed so badly over the loss I took him to the vet. He'd been over grooming to the point some of his skin was bald!

It took him about 6 months to get over it.

Time will help heal the wound of course, during the meantime you put one foot in front of the other and try to move forward as best you can. And don't let anyone make you feel silly for grieving about a pet.

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Post #: 24

RE: Losing a pet - 2/10/2014 4:07:45 PM

Runningkc

Posts: 51
Joined: 2/15/2010
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Just wanted to post an update. Last weekend Rufus joined the family. Jax and I went to petsmart for dog food and the humane society had a few dogs there. Rufus and Jax hit it off immediately. There's just something about having a puppy in the house that can't help but make you smile, both humans and four-leggeds.

He's half boxer, half aussie.

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Post #: 25

RE: Losing a pet - 2/10/2014 4:26:08 PM

anniezz338

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Joined: 8/17/2010
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He's adorable! Puppies are fun, too. I hope you enjoy the new addition to your family.

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Post #: 26

RE: Losing a pet - 2/10/2014 4:43:09 PM

HntersToy

Posts: 56
Joined: 12/7/2013
Status: offline

Huge tight hugs to you! My Maltese pups went to work with me and since we have no children, they were our babies. I know it hurts, you saw more than you should have ever been exposed to. I wanted to share a bit, but it still hurts many years later. I will pray that the hurt passes for you.

(in reply to anniezz338)

Post #: 27

RE: Losing a pet - 2/10/2014 5:08:22 PM

LafayetteLady

Posts: 7683
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Northern New Jersey
Status: offline

He is adorable. Please leash train him and his big brother so you never go through that horror again.

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Post #: 28

RE: Losing a pet - 2/10/2014 5:12:54 PM

smileforme50

Posts: 1623
Joined: 1/24/2013
From: DelaWHERE(?)
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Oooh....Rufus is ADORABLE.....what breed is he?

I love his jacket!

_____________________________

“Give it to me!” she yelled
“I’m so fucking wet! Give it to me now!”

She could scream all she wanted…..I was keeping the umbrella.

(in reply to LafayetteLady)

Post #: 29

RE: Losing a pet - 2/10/2014 5:24:12 PM

Runningkc

Posts: 51
Joined: 2/15/2010
Status: offline

Thank you for your concern, but I do put a lot of time into training my dogs. I live out in the country. They do not stay fenced in, they stay by my side unless they're napping in the house.

What happened to Oakley was a horrible accident, but just that, an accident. Please don't assume I wasn't doing my job as a responsible pet owner.

I thoroughly enjoy dog training, and Jax knows everything from basics like sit and stay (and how to walk on a leash), to fetching beer for me out of the fridge. Sometimes even when everything is done right, shit just happens.

(in reply to LafayetteLady)

Post #: 30

RE: Losing a pet - 2/10/2014 5:28:40 PM

Runningkc

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Joined: 2/15/2010
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Thank you :D He's half australian shepherd, half boxer. He LOVES his coat. This last week with the single digit temps it's been more than necessary, even though I never thought that I'd be a girl with clothes...for her dog... lol

(in reply to smileforme50)

Post #: 31

RE: Losing a pet - 2/10/2014 6:07:47 PM

windchymes

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Joined: 4/18/2005
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He's awesome!!!

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Post #: 32

RE: Losing a pet - 2/10/2014 9:03:27 PM

LafayetteLady

Posts: 7683
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Northern New Jersey
Status: offline

I'm certainly not accusing you of being irresponsible. However, training alone doesn't keep them safe, and when they catch a scent, they don't always listen.

I don't know where you live, but in the US most areas have leash laws.

I always had well trained dogs as well, but lost a beloved pet to the road years. Ago. This was a dog that NEVER left the property, except that one time, which was all it took.

(in reply to windchymes)

Post #: 33

RE: Losing a pet - 2/11/2014 5:43:05 AM

Runningkc

Posts: 51
Joined: 2/15/2010
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In Kansas, there are no leash laws outside the city limits. I live out in the county.

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Post #: 34

RE: Losing a pet - 2/11/2014 6:46:18 AM

AlexisANew

Posts: 103
Joined: 2/10/2014
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He is absolutely adorable!! We have so many Australian Shepherds in my dogs puppy class and they are tough hardy dogs and very clever too. I hope he has a long and wonderful life with you.

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Post #: 35

RE: Losing a pet - 2/11/2014 7:04:22 AM

JstAnotherSub

Posts: 6174
Status: offline

Absolutely adorable. For me, the only thing that will plug the hole in my heart left by a furbaby is getting another one from the pound to love.

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Post #: 36

RE: Losing a pet - 2/11/2014 8:43:11 AM

tommonymous

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Joined: 1/21/2013
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Runningkc

Thank you for your concern, but I do put a lot of time into training my dogs. I live out in the country. They do not stay fenced in, they stay by my side unless they're napping in the house.

What happened to Oakley was a horrible accident, but just that, an accident. Please don't assume I wasn't doing my job as a responsible pet owner.

I thoroughly enjoy dog training, and Jax knows everything from basics like sit and stay (and how to walk on a leash), to fetching beer for me out of the fridge. Sometimes even when everything is done right, shit just happens.

That's a healthy attitude. I know losing pets is a shitty deal, especially in the way you did. It's good to see you're not letting the experience have an out-sized impact on your life. And the new pup looks like trouble.

_____________________________

"Remember kids. Just because it hasn't happened to you doesn't mean it doesn't happen at all." --Hillwilliam

And just because it worked for you, doesn't mean it will (or ought to) work for everyone.

(in reply to Runningkc)

Post #: 37

RE: Losing a pet - 2/11/2014 9:08:52 AM

LadyConstanze

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Joined: 2/18/2005
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I agree, you honour the memory of your other dog by giving another dog a home!

I love my cats and dogs, dreading the day I will have to part with any of them, I know I'll be such a mess, they are family. But the new pup looks like he will cheer you both up, which seems to be just what the doctor ordered!

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Those who do and those who don't!

http://exdomme.blogspot.com/2012/07/public-service-announcement.html

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Post #: 38

RE: Losing a pet - 2/11/2014 12:07:43 PM

dollparts85

Posts: 1233
Joined: 10/22/2006
From: NY
Status: offline

I lost my rabbit, Jellybean, back in Sept. He was my first long term pet. He died suddenly...he was fine, running around normal one day...next day started showing signs of GI stasis which he developed every time he molted...I treated him like usual...then within a couple hours, he started gasping for air and then died in my arms within a couple minutes. :( I know what you're going through. It's really hard. It doesn't really get easier either...I still cry every day. Jellybean's ashes live on my desk now so he's always close by...

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"Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes its the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, I will try again tomorrow"

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Post #: 39

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