Rawni
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Subonico
quote:
ORIGINAL: FieryOpal
What men don't always understand is that it's not about the sex. Well, it is to a lesser extent.
What's bothering me isn't so much that I was all wrong about what female dominance really meant, to the woman - nor that almost everything I read about it is wrong - but that I really don't understand it - nor the conflict in my mind about it (since my objectives may be clearly different than that of the female dominant). Sigh.
Before asking this question, all I had at my disposal were my pre-conceieved ideas, the internet, and porn videos.
I knew enough to know that all those porn videos of women jacking off bound men wasn't what it was all about, but, usually there is "some" truth in movies, although, I fear, for female dominance videos, there may be almost none. I do know enough to realize that porn videos, while prevalent and certainly easy to find and enjoyable to watch, are made for the audience, which, almost certainly isn't my target audience of female dominants. So, scratch that avenue of possible research! :)
I am surprised that my googling to see what the net had to say about female dominance came up with all the wrong answers also. For example, I won't even begin to go into what seems so very odd about a Mystress World style dominance, as I am cognizant of the eccentricities in her approach. But, I certainly had thought that there would be some female-sponsored sites which did give insight.
I tried a site which purported to be for men wanting to reach female dominants, but all it did was send me mail that I couldn't even respond to - without paying a fee - which made me think scam from the start.
I will continue to try to learn what female dominance means, and, of course, if I find someone who will show me, that would be best (but it's a long shot, and that quest is best left for the personals anyway). So what I'll do is advertise on craigslist for a woman to show me the ropes, and, I'll head off to a local munch and ask there (but I'm sure it will be an odd request), and, I'll continue to try to find a good resource on the net.
Here are some I'm hoping are somewhat closer to reality.
1. Elise Sutton's site dedicated to Female Domination and male submission within loving and caring relationships
2. Mistress Scarlett's real life blog of female domination
3. And, maybe Collars N Cuffs forum site
I doubt I'm actually going about this the right way, so, please let me know of better resources for figuring this all out, given that I the conundrum is not so much to figure out what it is, but to figure out what it is and where I fit into the picture (if anywhere).
People that create web sites or write books, are trying to make money, therefore it must be profitable to make the effort. There aren't a lot of people that have the time and the money to put out good information about themselves or a group they might fit into if it will mean a constant drain upon them. So those you find online are most likely making money and personally... I believe they are catering to the kinky male that lives in this fantasy world and wouldn't be functional with a dominant woman, not making money on being a dominant. Men flock to these sites and books not to learn about dominant women, but to get their kink on. They are not interested in the reality of it. They won't spend money on the truth.. but they will spend hundreds or thousands for the kink.
Throughout the years, I used my journal to dispel some things, so that submissive men could see another view. I rarely do the in-depth stuff anymore because really... other than those that watch my journal and have for years.. who already get it... it is taking time from what I need to do to support myself. I can also run off a kinky player faster than anyone I personally know. I am one scary broad to so many scardy cats.
If you truly wish to know the truth... you will stop seeking in the same manner you have. You will think about women as more than a sexy, sexual being there to please your kinky needs when and where you want it... with no strings or attachments and placing a woman basically at your kinky feet, to provide what you want, while you call it service. Even after we told you a bit, you continued with an online search and came up with similar bs to the article you posted here and still don't see the signs that indicate you are dealing with kinky money makers rather than simply dominant women. (Yes, I did go to the site and I know of Elise.. so didn't need to go there.)
If you cannot give more than what you offer on your profile, then you cannot expect someone to invest a lot of time with you... because your root interest is off when it comes to a dominant woman not in it for the money, even if she isn't in it for a relationship. It would only work with those things you are subjecting yourself to... and paying for it if you aren't offering a bit more yourself. If you ever really want to get serious about this... you will stop repeating the same patterns. You are of an age, where you can see the similarities between all the things you have been reading. We have told you different things than these sites, including the ones you just posted. There is a disconnect, but as long as you only wish to give minor bit parts in role play... don't expect a dominant woman to be out there wasting her money for a web site that talks about dominant women or teaching you in person. You are either in or out. Your choice.
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RE: What is female dominance? - 
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