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RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced th... - 3/3/2014 5:29:53 AM

MasterCaneman

Posts: 3842
Joined: 3/21/2013
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quote:

ORIGINAL: pg4g

quote:

ORIGINAL: AthenaSurrenders

Sheesh crazy! Next you'll be telling me that Pirates of the Caribbean isn't an accurate depiction of piracy. Or that chocolate factories don't really mix their chocolate by waterfall.

THEY DON'T MIX THEIR CHOCOLATE BY WATERFALL?????

YOU MEAN THE OOMPA-LOOMPAS AREN'T REAL, EITHER?????

Sorry, hit post too soon myself here. Most of my past partners were already into it when I met them, thanks to the fact that I tended to meet women in the biker/rocker/fetish-centric bars and clubs I hung out and worked in. I've introduced a couple of vanillas to what I was into it with mixed results. Some accepted it on the 'bedroom game' level, others declined totally.

< Message edited by MasterCaneman -- 3/3/2014 5:34:24 AM >

_____________________________

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(in reply to pg4g)

Post #: 21

RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced th... - 3/3/2014 6:03:10 AM

MAINEiacMISTRESS

Posts: 1180
Joined: 9/12/2012
Status: offline

I'm not interested in "seducing" men...but I've found a lot of them are "outed" by certain things I do, wear. Guys do funny things when they see My toe rings and pedicure (guys ogling My feet bump into things at the mall, repairmen forget their tools when they leave, etc) I must give off a very Dominant vibe just being Myself because vanilla men either confess to Me I scare the shit out of them, or else they say I scare the shit out of them and they wish I'd put a collar on their neck, whip them, then make them crawl on all fours and eat from a bowl like a dog.

Of course, being in a vanilla setting and not knowing Me that well they are certainly JOKING...but if only they KNEW...

(in reply to Blueswordsman)

Post #: 22

RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced th... - 3/3/2014 6:21:35 AM

LadyConstanze

Posts: 9722
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Blueswordsman

quote:

ORIGINAL: bachus

The only way to introduce a vanilla to D/s is if they have not discovered that side of them yet.
Just as you can not make anyone gay, or straight, you can not make someone D/s.
At least that is my opinion.

You can. Just start off with little things .... Nine and a half weeks is an example. I think most women are sexually submissive and just need it to be brought out. Although I never was involved with a masochists I think you right about comparing gay or straight to sadist and masochists

You lost me with the quote I underlined...

As for your idea of 9 1/2 weeks, are you talking about the Hollywood movie or did you take the trouble to read the book? You'll find that the thing with words in (aka the book) is significantly different than the movie.

As for seducing somebody into BDSM, oh come on, most people really don't lead such a sheltered life, anybody who's been sexually active will have experimented a bit with stuff like holding the partner down during sex, blindfolding them, tying them up, rough sex and all that, just because they might use a silk scarf instead of a rope or leather restrains doesn't make it "less" BDSM and more vanilla, it's just what's handy.

If you use 9 1/2 weeks as your seduction handbook, you best go off and buy 50 Shades, but make sure you also get the wardrobe, the flat, the cars and the planes, might increase your success rate dramatically...

_____________________________

There are 10 kinds of people who understand binary
Those who do and those who don't!

http://exdomme.blogspot.com/2012/07/public-service-announcement.html

(in reply to Blueswordsman)

Post #: 23

RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced th... - 3/3/2014 6:54:35 AM

SpaceSpank

Posts: 244
Joined: 10/3/2010
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You can't turn someone into BDSM that has no desire for it. The end.

If you have "done it", guess what, they had an interest in it. They may or may not have known about it, but once exposed, they liked it.

When I first started I knew things I liked for instance, but "BDSM" was this thing that was the butt of jokes in movies. The naughty punchline they never got into. I'm sure for a great many people that's still true. It's the gimp in pulp fiction, it's the deviant sex shop that only perverts and freaks shop at. It's all these things that "good and normal" people don't look at.

But in truth it's more than that, but you have to take the time to look, and unless they have a driving desire to do some of those things... they likely won't.

Even still, if this vanilla partner who you "seduced" into D/s wasn't interested enough to get involved on their own (unless quite young), they are likely not going to be interested enough to really be that involved now. They may like a bit of kinky sex... but plenty of vanilla folks enjoy some kinky sex too. As LadyConstanze noted above me, they may use different tools to do the same job in those situations, but it's not really any different.

(in reply to LadyConstanze)

Post #: 24

RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced th... - 3/3/2014 7:15:15 AM

LadyConstanze

Posts: 9722
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline

I think you can encourage people to be a bit more open minded about it, you know by gently introducing them, but a lot of guys are absolutely ham fisted, they see something in porn and think it's a great idea. The amount of guys who want a bit of kink in their lives, instead of approaching the woman slowly, do it in a romantic atmosphere, watch a movie and whisper something like "Oh you'd look so hot in that outfit, if you'd tie me up, you could do anything to me..." and take it from there, but nope, some go and buy a strapon, tacky looking SM gear and give it to their wives or girlfriends as a present and then they are shocked when she shows no interest to play... I mean DUHHHHHHHHHH

_____________________________

There are 10 kinds of people who understand binary
Those who do and those who don't!

http://exdomme.blogspot.com/2012/07/public-service-announcement.html

(in reply to SpaceSpank)

Post #: 25

RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced th... - 3/3/2014 9:14:21 AM

Blueswordsman

Posts: 173
Joined: 10/3/2011
Status: offline

I didn't know there was a Nine and a Half Weeks book. I used the movie as an example of how to slowly seduce some one into submission. I do believe stuff like, I love it when you swallow, dance for me, not too rough sex, light bondage (more helpless than uncomfortablel) , playful biting, etc leads to kneel. I think KNEEL is when vanilla melts into submissive grey. Please note I said, I believe most women were submissive by nature, certainly not all.

(in reply to LadyConstanze)

Post #: 26

RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced th... - 3/3/2014 9:20:59 AM

Blueswordsman

Posts: 173
Joined: 10/3/2011
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze

I think you can encourage people to be a bit more open minded about it, you know by gently introducing them, but a lot of guys are absolutely ham fisted, they see something in porn and think it's a great idea. The amount of guys who want a bit of kink in their lives, instead of approaching the woman slowly, do it in a romantic atmosphere, watch a movie and whisper something like "Oh you'd look so hot in that outfit, if you'd tie me up, you could do anything to me..." and take it from there, but nope, some go and buy a strapon, tacky looking SM gear and give it to their wives or girlfriends as a present and then they are shocked when she shows no interest to play... I mean DUHHHHHHHHHH

I rose every Thursday in the afternoon, 14 Valentine Cards beginning February 1st, An appreciative look, It's the little things that wins a heart.

(in reply to LadyConstanze)

Post #: 27

RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced th... - 3/3/2014 9:52:25 AM

lovmuffin

Posts: 3759
Joined: 9/28/2007
Status: offline

From a fairly early age, long before the Internet I was tying up women in the bedroom. Most of them liked the idea and various kink. One even turned the tables. I don't mean a lifestyle thing, just in the bedroom.

(in reply to Blueswordsman)

Post #: 28

RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced th... - 3/3/2014 10:02:44 AM

freedomdwarf1

Posts: 6845
Joined: 10/23/2012
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Blueswordsman
I didn't know there was a Nine and a Half Weeks book.

Where the fuck have you been living?? Under a wet rock?
Most movies are based on books or plays.
Apart from prequels and sequels, it's not common for a movie to be made directly from a specific movie script.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Blueswordsman
I used the movie as an example of how to slowly seduce some one into submission.

Typical male - Hollywood reality!

quote:

ORIGINAL: Blueswordsman
I do believe stuff like, I love it when you swallow, dance for me, not too rough sex, light bondage (more helpless than uncomfortablel) , playful biting, etc leads to kneel.

More fantasy crap.
I shake my head in disbelief when I read this sort of stuff from so-called adults.
It's just as bad as those saying smoking weed leads to hard drugs. It just doesn't. Period.
Seems like there are people sooo gullible that they believe the TV soaps are real.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Blueswordsman
I think KNEEL is when vanilla melts into submissive grey. Please note I said, I believe most women were submissive by nature, certainly not all.

Most? Really?? How naive and blinkered.
I think you'll find your belief doesn't match reality.

(in reply to Blueswordsman)

Post #: 29

RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced th... - 3/3/2014 10:10:08 AM

Blueswordsman

Posts: 173
Joined: 10/3/2011
Status: offline

Works for me. Or do you think it's my good looks?

(in reply to freedomdwarf1)

Post #: 30

RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced th... - 3/3/2014 12:36:55 PM

bachus

Posts: 31
Joined: 1/27/2014
Status: offline

Kinky sex is not the same as D/s. Sure anyone can experiment with kinky sex and like it. Even I have been able to "seduce" women into Kinky sex, so I am sure an incredible good looking person will have no problem. Especially with all those Mr Grey fans around. But I believe your question was if you have actually ever introduced someone into D/s. I think there is a difference, D/s is not something you choose, it is not something you do because you like the sex, it is something you need. You are driven to it because of a deep innate desire to either control or be controlled, to submit or to dominate. That is not something with can be induced by good looks or smart pick-up lines.

There is a very nice article on the submissive guide about exactly this.
http://www.submissiveguide.com/2009/06/bdsm-ds-2/
There is one sentence in that article that i think summons it all very well.
"D/s however is the emotional side. The act of emotionally and/or psychologically submitting or Dominating someone."

To successfully sustain your D/s relationship there is a lot of work needed from both parties,seducing someone into D/s if that person is not inclined to be in a D/s relationship will almost certainly fail, because the amount of continuous seduction that would be needed from one of the parties is simply unsustainable.

(in reply to Blueswordsman)

Post #: 31

RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced th... - 3/3/2014 2:51:23 PM

lilcracker

Posts: 243
Joined: 4/14/2012
Status: offline

My current partner was vanilla....I can't say I seduced him. We met in person...became friendly....he asked me out...and over a period of time we became great friends....roomates/FWB and eventually became partners....and yes I did bring up my submissive personality...we still are mostly vanilla....except spankings.

(in reply to Blueswordsman)

Post #: 32

RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced th... - 3/3/2014 3:00:42 PM

Blueswordsman

Posts: 173
Joined: 10/3/2011
Status: offline

bachus,
lunaKM, described D/s as the act of emotionally and/or psychologically submitting or Dominating someone." I agree. Love it when you swallow, dance for me, not too rough sex, light bondage (more helpless than uncomfortablel) , playful biting, etc are acts of emotionally and psychologically dominating someone.

Like oil the vanilla submissive well has to be taped and some holes will be dry.

I also agree that a long term D/s relationship requires D/s cravings.

(in reply to bachus)

Post #: 33

RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced th... - 3/3/2014 3:04:07 PM

Blueswordsman

Posts: 173
Joined: 10/3/2011
Status: offline

My wife did it to me too.

(in reply to lilcracker)

Post #: 34

RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced th... - 3/3/2014 4:05:01 PM

kalikshama

Posts: 14805
Joined: 8/8/2010
Status: offline

quote:

If you ever have seduced a vanilla lady/guy and introduced them to D/s? If yes, can you relate the experience.

My (now ex) husband and I went from mildly kinky sex to heavier kink. We didn't have any D/s. I don't know if I've slept with any strictly vanilla guys since then. I have DomDar

(What I really means is TopDar, but it doesn't scan as well.)

As for my far fewer outside-the-bedroom Dominance/submission relationships, they were already like that when I met them, even the 20-somethings.

(in reply to Blueswordsman)

Post #: 35

RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced th... - 3/3/2014 4:08:59 PM

kalikshama

Posts: 14805
Joined: 8/8/2010
Status: offline

quote:

Sheesh crazy! Next you'll be telling me that Pirates of the Caribbean isn't an accurate depiction of piracy. Or that chocolate factories don't really mix their chocolate by waterfall.

(in reply to AthenaSurrenders)

Post #: 36

RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced th... - 3/3/2014 5:19:28 PM

Blueswordsman

Posts: 173
Joined: 10/3/2011
Status: offline

Is that a red eyed furry pussy?

(in reply to kalikshama)

Post #: 37

RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced th... - 3/3/2014 5:23:11 PM

shiftyw

Posts: 2837
Joined: 6/6/2013
From: The Shire
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze

I think you can encourage people to be a bit more open minded about it, you know by gently introducing them, but a lot of guys are absolutely ham fisted, they see something in porn and think it's a great idea. The amount of guys who want a bit of kink in their lives, instead of approaching the woman slowly, do it in a romantic atmosphere, watch a movie and whisper something like "Oh you'd look so hot in that outfit, if you'd tie me up, you could do anything to me..." and take it from there, but nope, some go and buy a strapon, tacky looking SM gear and give it to their wives or girlfriends as a present and then they are shocked when she shows no interest to play... I mean DUHHHHHHHHHH

this x100.

(in reply to LadyConstanze)

Post #: 38

RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced th... - 3/3/2014 5:53:21 PM

littlewonder

Posts: 15659
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Blueswordsman

quote:

ORIGINAL: crazyml

You know that nine and a half weeks wasn't a proper, peer reviewed, study don't you?

You know it was a <finger quotes>film</finger quotes> don't you?

No Nine and a half weeks was not a proper, peer reviewed, study. It was an example of how to slowly seduce the submissiveness out of a woman.

eerr...did you actually watch this entire movie?? If so you wouldn't be saying that. It had zilch to do with bdsm.

_____________________________

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Post #: 39

RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced th... - 3/3/2014 5:57:04 PM

littlewonder

Posts: 15659
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MrRodgers
...top their horny asses and they could start with a warm bath. You for some reason, put a smile on my face.

eerr...no thanks. I have no desire to ever top anyone...period.

_____________________________

Nothing has changed
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Post #: 40

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