If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced them to D/s (Full Version)

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Blueswordsman -> If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced them to D/s (3/2/2014 3:43:49 PM)

If you ever have seduced a vanilla lady/guy and introduced them to D/s? If yes, can you relate the experience.




Rawni -> RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced them to D/s (3/2/2014 3:50:32 PM)

I have found my best partners in vanilla-land. Both male wives so to speak were vanilla. Both went on to continue with a dominant woman.

There isn't much more to say than they liked it. They wanted to be with me and that's what I wanted and that's what I got. Worked well. Then I am not a huge sadist, just bossy and run things and like being catered to. The last one didn't work so well because I didn't define how it was to be and didn't expect it to be, it just was. I didn't see the need because he naturally did everything I wanted. Big mistake. [:D]




DarkSteven -> RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced them to D/s (3/2/2014 4:25:43 PM)

Sorta. Never done it successfully.

Lady 1 - When we were about to get naked, I told her that I liked to take control in bed. She smiled and said, "Good!" I got her over my lap and gave her a few light spanks and she got upset and left.

Lady 2 - When I moved in for a kiss, I gave her butt a swat. She didn't object, so I gave her a few more during the kiss. She was more than willing to get spanked, but we were too vanilla-incompatible to make it work.




shiftyw -> RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced them to D/s (3/2/2014 4:26:18 PM)

Yup a few.
Current man is included.

ETA (I hit 'post' prematurely)-

I just am who I am. I'm not D/s all the time mind you, just in the bedroom- so I think that makes it a little easier.
I've always been attracted to dominant people, so I suspect it is usually within them to begin with.

With current beau- he was pretty "go after what he wants", I told him I loved that, I made it clear I was a masochist, and enjoyed bondage really early on, and we've since followed our combined interests and explored from there.




littlewonder -> RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced them to D/s (3/2/2014 8:40:33 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Blueswordsman

If you ever have seduced a vanilla lady/guy and introduced them to D/s? If yes, can you relate the experience.


Since I've never understood the difference or when someone is vanilla or bdsm, I guess I don't know how to answer this or if I ever did or not.




DaddySatyr -> RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced them to D/s (3/2/2014 8:52:11 PM)

I don't know that I've "seduced" anyone in 30 years.

I have met ladies and explained what D/s means to me and have them nod their head and ...

I have a had a few very successful relationships that started that way.

I live with one of those ladies, right now and have been communicating with another.

I find it just kind of happens. My way of life is what works for me and I won't compromise on the core of that system. Once ladies realize that (and realize that I'm not into that much that would be considered BDSM), they seem to either "get on board" or decide that it is they who need to be the ultimate authority in a relationship; which, of course, makes us incompatible.







littlewonder -> RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced them to D/s (3/2/2014 8:59:06 PM)

When I was single, I just dated men...period. I never looked at them as bdsm or d/s or vanilla...just men. And then let the chips fall where they may. We either meshed or we didn't. I never explained bdsm or d/s to any of them. For me the only thing that's ever been important is that they are a dominant personality and a leader in life.

So for me, I have no idea where those lines are drawn of what is bdsm or d/s and what is vanilla.




pg4g -> RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced them to D/s (3/2/2014 10:37:05 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Blueswordsman

If you ever have seduced a vanilla lady/guy and introduced them to D/s? If yes, can you relate the experience.



D/s in a relationship sense? Not exactly. I'm dominant generally in the relationship, just by nature, and it just so happened that I found a guy who fit with that.

In the bedroom? That's a different story. I always led for the most part, until I started to prompt him to... er... turn the tables on me. And he did. And he loved it.

S&M was harder for him to accept. He's pain-phobic. Hates it. I told him I'm a masochist. Hurt me. Rape me. Make me hate you for a bit. I'll love it. And he slowly did. He found it hard to accept he enjoyed being cruel to me.

Then I slowly disclosed that I enjoy being in control in bed as well, and I'm a sadist as well. I had to be careful how I did this, because he might start to fear me. He eventually trusted me enough to tie him up, but I will never hurt him, and that trust was hard earned and a great gift from him.

Does it work? My oath. Is it easy? Definitely not.




Missokyst -> RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced them to D/s (3/2/2014 10:57:11 PM)

If they weren't kinked before they met me, they found their was around to it sooner or later.  Mostly sooner.  I must give out a vibe.




bachus -> RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced them to D/s (3/2/2014 10:58:54 PM)

The only way to introduce a vanilla to D/s is if they have not discovered that side of them yet.
Just as you can not make anyone gay, or straight, you can not make someone D/s.
At least that is my opinion.




FieryOpal -> RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced them to D/s (3/2/2014 11:14:23 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Missokyst

If they weren't kinked before they met me, they found their was around to it sooner or later.  Mostly sooner.  I must give out a vibe.
[Bolding mine]
That's what I can't understand when a couple gets married, and it's usually the husband who complains a few years on down the road either a) how uninterested his wife is in sex anymore and he barely gets any, and/or b) his wife is so sexually inhibited that she only wants the missionary position. In this day and age with pre-marital sex being pretty much the standard modus operandi, this just doesn't compute. Obviously, you married for the wrong reasons because if you were truly intimate with one another and madly in love, you would want to please your partner and be willing to be open to explore the sexual landscape with them, baring deal-breakers (such as going outside the confines of an exclusive marital dynamic, or getting into extreme sex acts far beyond stretching your comfort zone).

I don't think my own experiences are isolated or so unique. Kinky people attract other kinky people, thank goodness. My ex started out vanilla, as did I (although I had been having D/s sexual fantasies for many years), but we were vanilla kinky, as opposed to BDSM kinky. There were a few years of a power struggle when it came to the D/s part. My husband eventually came to his senses and accepted his submissiveness. He was hard-headed in that fashion, but I knew better, and *we* had to gradually peel away layers and layers of trust issues to get to that point.




MrRodgers -> RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced them to D/s (3/2/2014 11:15:12 PM)

Absolutely. Worked in DC, went to a local pizzeria just down from American Univ. Met a coed 19, body language, signals, soon we were alone.

Told her male domination existed in life. I lead on the dance floor, she follows. In the bedroom, I command, she obeys. I did, she did and we were off and running as it were. Got even luckier, met her g/f 21, also a coed as the same school where they both worked and attended.

Soon we were a tireless poly as they were both very bi, the younger already married and divorced and they both had decided they were now going to enjoy the best sex life they could. They did...with me, for two semesters. Got their bachelors and went on their way.

Another coed, lived in the apt. above mine. Soon we were dom and sub., g/f from Europe visited, both were bi-curious, we had a short term poly. She got her PHD, entered medical school, went to work for NIH. met a Dr. and that was as they say...the end of that.

Another, housewife 30, actually came on to me. Husband knew she played, became my sub/slut for 2 years, he didn't have the time with full time school and work. SOB, never thanked me for turning his wife into an insatiable cock whore.




MrRodgers -> RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced them to D/s (3/2/2014 11:20:58 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder


quote:

ORIGINAL: Blueswordsman

If you ever have seduced a vanilla lady/guy and introduced them to D/s? If yes, can you relate the experience.


Since I've never understood the difference or when someone is vanilla or bdsm, I guess I don't know how to answer this or if I ever did or not.


Girl, as I've advised others and with what little I think I know about and have seen of you. You could have profiled as a sweet sexy sub, chatted with all of the young, ready, college badboys, with the 6-pack abs and the gift of gab. Get dates with them and when they arrive...top their horny asses and they could start with a warm bath. You for some reason, put a smile on my face.




MrRodgers -> RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced them to D/s (3/2/2014 11:24:00 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: bachus

The only way to introduce a vanilla to D/s is if they have not discovered that side of them yet.
Just as you can not make anyone gay, or straight, you can not make someone D/s.
At least that is my opinion.

You are not totally wrong but by now after what I've been through, I know that people and maybe men easier can...inspire sexual submission in people. It takes timing, reading signals, acting on them, creating more signals and then, well.....?




crazyml -> RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced them to D/s (3/3/2014 12:00:24 AM)

Meh.

I've introduced "vanilla" women to kinkiness quite a few times, but they were always people I was sure were likely to like it.

What happens more often is that I find myself attracted to a woman who appears to be vanilla, and then turns out to be a secret kinkster.

I'm a big believer in the "vibe" that Missokyst refers to.




Blueswordsman -> RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced them to D/s (3/3/2014 12:07:08 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: bachus

The only way to introduce a vanilla to D/s is if they have not discovered that side of them yet.
Just as you can not make anyone gay, or straight, you can not make someone D/s.
At least that is my opinion.

You can. Just start off with little things .... Nine and a half weeks is an example. I think most women are sexually submissive and just need it to be brought out. Although I never was involved with a masochists I think you right about comparing gay or straight to sadist and masochists




crazyml -> RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced them to D/s (3/3/2014 12:10:23 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Blueswordsman

quote:

ORIGINAL: bachus

The only way to introduce a vanilla to D/s is if they have not discovered that side of them yet.
Just as you can not make anyone gay, or straight, you can not make someone D/s.
At least that is my opinion.

You can. Just start off with little things .... Nine and a half weeks is an example. I think most women are sexually submissive and just need it to be brought out. Although I never was involved with a masochists I think you right about comparing gay or straight to sadist and masochists



You know that nine and a half weeks wasn't a proper, peer reviewed, study don't you?

You know it was a <finger quotes>film</finger quotes> don't you?




AthenaSurrenders -> RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced them to D/s (3/3/2014 12:57:17 AM)

Sheesh crazy! Next you'll be telling me that Pirates of the Caribbean isn't an accurate depiction of piracy. Or that chocolate factories don't really mix their chocolate by waterfall.




pg4g -> RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced them to D/s (3/3/2014 1:35:05 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: AthenaSurrenders

Sheesh crazy! Next you'll be telling me that Pirates of the Caribbean isn't an accurate depiction of piracy. Or that chocolate factories don't really mix their chocolate by waterfall.


THEY DON'T MIX THEIR CHOCOLATE BY WATERFALL?????




Blueswordsman -> RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced them to D/s (3/3/2014 4:51:45 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: crazyml

You know that nine and a half weeks wasn't a proper, peer reviewed, study don't you?

You know it was a <finger quotes>film</finger quotes> don't you?



No Nine and a half weeks was not a proper, peer reviewed, study. It was an example of how to slowly seduce the submissiveness out of a woman.




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