RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced them to D/s (Full Version)

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VideoAdminChi -> RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced them to D/s (3/6/2014 10:15:44 AM)

FR,

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VideoAdminChi -> RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced them to D/s (3/6/2014 10:32:58 AM)

Unlocked. A number of posts have been removed.

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DesFIP -> RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced them to D/s (3/7/2014 6:06:45 PM)

Anyway, I've never been underhanded and tried to trick people into things. I abhor that kind of behavior.
What I have done is ask them to try something. I've never had that go amiss. No one's ever called me names or said I was sick.

They tried it once or twice and decided it wasn't for them. And since that's a perfectly legitimate response, I've accepted it without putting them down as unenlightened or too afraid or any of the other shit I see guys here say about women who they lied to, who when they learned the truth, were clear about being uninterested.

Nobody owes me a relationship. Nobody owes me kinky sex. Good people seek a win/win solution where both people are happy. And you get that by being open and honest about your needs and not becoming involved with people who are not sufficiently compatible with you.



Musicmystery -> RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced them to D/s (3/7/2014 8:50:51 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Blueswordsman

If you ever have seduced a vanilla lady/guy and introduced them to D/s? If yes, can you relate the experience.

It's pretty common. A lot of girls are submissive and just need an experienced guy to tip the scales.



Musicmystery -> RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced them to D/s (3/7/2014 8:53:05 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: crazyml

Meh.

I've introduced "vanilla" women to kinkiness quite a few times, but they were always people I was sure were likely to like it.

What happens more often is that I find myself attracted to a woman who appears to be vanilla, and then turns out to be a secret kinkster.

I'm a big believer in the "vibe" that Missokyst refers to.

This too.



Musicmystery -> RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced them to D/s (3/7/2014 8:54:24 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: AthenaSurrenders

Sheesh crazy! Next you'll be telling me that Pirates of the Caribbean isn't an accurate depiction of piracy. Or that chocolate factories don't really mix their chocolate by waterfall.

OK...this was just funny!



Tantriqu -> RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced them to D/s (3/7/2014 8:57:11 PM)

I wouldn't say 'seduced', but absolutely dated and successfully bedded men who were very vanilla and then sometimes without words and sometimes with discussion they know I'm in control. Most women control their men and sex one way or another; I'm perhaps more direct and communicative about it, and of course, not all women do what I love to do to good men!
So for me the exception is knowing a man is sub before I've bedded him.
Both are equally sweet :-)



GoddessManko -> RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced them to D/s (3/7/2014 9:00:53 PM)

Yes, he was my Dom. I just knew he never had that power exchange before and it was my gift to him.
I will probably never sub again though, once was good enough.
Forcing a nilla man to sub...LOL, no, I'm too kinky. I've definitely emasculated quite a few verbally or otherwise throughout the years though and yes, it felt delicious. :)



DoYouLikePain -> RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced them to D/s (4/11/2014 4:43:06 PM)

That's the ONLY way we could do it in the 70s & 80s. Except Eulenspiegel & Janus, BdSm groups were few & far between. (To that I"ll add that, the more religiously conservative a city ... such as Tulsa ... the kinkier & the more there were. Tulsa had 10x the kinky folks, swappers, etc than OKC.)

And the only way to do it was to find someone open-minded & willing to try something new ... and then push a little at the edges while all the while watching her responses ... and learning when to push further, keep 'er steady as she goes, or back off.

As I'm mentioned elsewhere, the alternative was an orange wardrobe & a totally new & different group of sexual partners.

Also, these days "greek" is a bit more of an exception, whereas in the 60s, it was a reasonable form of birth control, or a way a girl could still claim to "be a virgin" ... so, in some ways, more readily acceptable.




Culdron -> RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced them to (4/18/2014 5:37:31 PM)

I was with someone who was very domineering, that I tried to turn dominating instead. It failed miserably, for a lot of reasons, but at the end it just bruised my heart. He was willing to try but not so much as learn or read anything available so I just ended up feeling guilty for wanting him to try.

As for the "Greek" of the '60s, President Clinton told all of us '90s kids oral wasn't sex and we ran with that.



orgasmdenial12 -> RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced them to D/s (4/20/2014 3:34:23 AM)

Yeah, in a couple of ways.

When I was 23 and we got the internet, I was in a vanilla relationship. I got so hooked on BDSM that I told him about it and that I wanted to explore - he very kindly gave me his blessing. I started going to munches and play parties, played with Doms, bought toys etc. He was interested in all this fun, crazy stuff I was doing so I showed him what I knew, and over time we became a D/s couple. We broke up after 6 years and he ended up as the Master of a very happy poly household with two female slaves, and he's been with them for about 7 years.

I had another relationship that started off vanilla and then grew to include some experimentation, but he became more of a submissive so we didn't really click in a kink way, although we did have fun going to parties and playing with others. (I'll never forget when he got spun round on one of those big wheels on the wall, and screamed the place down - we were all in stitches at him.)

Then I had another relationship with someone who was very new to the scene and I taught him everything, how to use toys and other aspects. He became very good at it and I was his slave for 3 years.



LordHeimdall -> RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced them to D/s (4/27/2014 4:23:25 AM)

Please help me to understand. I am probably going to ask a very stupid? ignorant? question but...

What is Vanilla?



InHisHeart -> RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced them to D/s (4/27/2014 4:50:49 AM)

There are no stupid questions. A vanilla relationship is a conventional, non-alternative relationship.



LordHeimdall -> RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced them to D/s (4/27/2014 5:02:24 AM)

Ahhh. I see. So then I was Vanilla and am now a 'Self-Proclaimed' and New, Dom... With, I am certain, a lot still to learn.

And it could be said that I have been wanting to make this switch for years, and am in the process of performing a conversion by bringing my wife along with me as my Sub...

And should Something ever happen to her (Accident, etc...) I could not see myself going back to Vanilla...



NiceButMeanGirl -> RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced them to D/s (4/27/2014 1:51:33 PM)

I wouldn't say I "seduced" a vanilla but I've dated vanillas. As a matter of fact, I'm dating one now that I met on OKCupid. I told him I'm kinky and dominant and what that means to me & he said "Hey, I'll try anything once and more if I like it." So I've been doing some swats on his bum as he goes by & a little ass play when things get hot. Now he's already talking wanting to try being spanked & pegged. He's also very much a pleaser & wants to make me happy. I'm thinking I might, that is might, have my local submissive. Time will tell.

NBMG



Bucephalus -> RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced them to D/s (4/27/2014 2:04:52 PM)

My current submissive was a long time vanilla friend of mine. In fact she'd been my best friend for several years. She'd always known my kinks, we have both always been very open with one another. In the last few months or so she'd been asking numerous questions pertaining to a D/s relationship and how all that worked, and I was always more than happy to explain things to her that I could, and even offer her a few bits of reading material. I thought she was simply curious about it all, so it came as a shock when she asked me if I would be willing to take her on as my submissive. I agreed to do so, and it's opened up a whole new level of trust and intimacy between us. She has been a quick learner and very eager to please, for me, she's been an excellent submissive. I don't know if you could consider this experience as seduction, but she was vanilla, and now, well, not.



asanaambitions -> RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced them to D/s (4/27/2014 6:56:52 PM)

I'm actually in a fairly similar situation to NBMG. Met a guy on OkCupid and though we haven't spent much time together he's already more eager to please, interested in my wants & needs and willing to experiment than any of the subs I've met from here have been. I'm enjoying not having any of the normal pre-conceived notions about how I should or should not be dominant being thrown at me. Now, I'm getting the impression this guy is for sure a submissive personality. But he's never done D/s before, so I suppose you could say I'm seducing him into one :)



DaddySatyr -> RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced them to D/s (4/27/2014 7:11:21 PM)

I have often thought about what I call "unspoiled" submissives.

There's a lot of "lifestyle babble" about "natural submissive" and "natural dominant". I believe that these people do exist. In fact, I believe that you can't teach dominance or submission. You can teach behaviors but, a person is who they are.

Anyway, my lady and I did not meet here. We met on another site and something that asana said rings very true to me: "I'm enjoying not having any of the normal pre-conceived notions about how I should or should not be dominant being thrown at me. Now, I'm getting the impression this lady is for sure a submissive personality".

I paraphrased, obviously but the point remains. I have found that there is real evidence to suggest that a lot of people are just "naturally" dominant or submissive. They're all over the place.

I've had ladies tell me that they don't find me particularly attractive but there's "just something about you ..." It turns out that they're submissives, looking for a dominant but they've just never been exposed to the concepts.

I think lifestyle sites are great for certain things but I also think that there's a tendency for some bad information to be thrown around and newbies assume "well, they've been around longer than I have. They must be right." More's the pity.







Screen captures still RULE! Ya feel me?



MatchurLimitsdom -> RE: If you ever have seduced a vanilla nd introduced them to D/s (5/12/2014 5:46:30 PM)

I believe Blueswordsman's got it. They all have it to one degree or another. Make a girl come for you like she never has before and progressively slip in the kink. Can take weeks/months/years to get to the really good stuff though :-/



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