Are real Dommes extinct? (Full Version)

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toptobottom -> Are real Dommes extinct? (7/7/2006 1:47:31 PM)

i pose this as a serious question and not one of disrespect. i have been wondering if there are any true Dommes who actually enjoy living the lifestyle and the challenge of taking a "lump of clay" and transforming him/her into someone worthy of service? i believe there is a sense of challenge for both parties - one of  accomplishment for the Domme, and one of true submission for the sub.  Yet looking both here and on other BDSM sites, i really don't see any Dommes seeking the challenge, the love of the lifestyle, the thrill of imposing Your will on another, or moving that person from a state of nothing to the real form of "sub."  What i do see are women wanting gifts and money in exchange for merely fulfilling a fantasy.  This just does not seem like the way of the lifestyle.  Please, if there are any Dommes out there who can shed some light on this subject, it would be greatly appreciated.  



michaelGA2 -> RE: Are real Dommes extinct? (7/7/2006 1:57:01 PM)

i have asked this question myself, let's hope your post gains more positive responses than mine. i anxiously await the answer to your question. good luck.



yourMissTress -> RE: Are real Dommes extinct? (7/7/2006 2:03:07 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: toptobottom

i pose this as a serious question and not one of disrespect. i have been wondering if there are any true Dommes who actually enjoy living the lifestyle and the challenge of taking a "lump of clay" and transforming him/her into someone worthy of service? i believe there is a sense of challenge for both parties - one of  accomplishment for the Domme, and one of true submission for the sub.  Yet looking both here and on other BDSM sites, i really don't see any Dommes seeking the challenge, the love of the lifestyle, the thrill of imposing Your will on another, or moving that person from a state of nothing to the real form of "sub."  What i do see are women wanting gifts and money in exchange for merely fulfilling a fantasy.  This just does not seem like the way of the lifestyle.  Please, if there are any Dommes out there who can shed some light on this subject, it would be greatly appreciated.  


First let me say that your question is completely disrespectful to both Dominas and submissives.  You assume that all Dominas (pro or otherwise) are money grubbing whores that are after nothing but your wallet.  As well as stating that the "true" Domina wants to start out with a "lump of clay" and not a person.  And then you further state that submissives need to be transformed "into someone worthy of service".  You had better be worthy of service before you attempt to contact any of us.
 
Second, there are many lifestyle Dominas here on CM.  Whining that you can't find us, and bitching about the pro-dominas that you have found will not attract or endear you to any of us. 
 
You have been here for 2 days.  Get rid of your hard on and get a grip on something resembling reality.  If what you are looking for is a quick fix for your wanker fantasies, I suggest that you stop alienating the pro-dommes and hire one.  If you are looking for a lifestyle Domme to have long term relationship with, then treat it as such and don't expect to put up a profile and have one waiting in your email every time you check it.



GoddessDustyGold -> RE: Are real Dommes extinct? (7/7/2006 2:07:19 PM)

Isn't this the same subject you began the day you joined (oh, that was 2 whole days ago!) on July 5th...For Real?
Ditto on MissTress's post.
I have nothing further to say.



MsKatHouston -> RE: Are real Dommes extinct? (7/7/2006 2:17:14 PM)

I was going to reply to this but I believe Miss Tress stated all there was to say.



Misstoyou -> RE: Are real Dommes extinct? (7/7/2006 2:21:37 PM)

Miss Tress covered it.

(And nice to have you posting again. [:)] )



gooddogbenji -> RE: Are real Dommes extinct? (7/7/2006 2:34:37 PM)

Hooray for MissTress!

But I would like to add that saying it is not disrespectful at the start of your post doesn't make it not disrespectful.  That's like saying, "no disrespect, but you're a fucking douchebag."

Yours,


benji



JohnWarren -> RE: Are real Dommes extinct? (7/7/2006 2:39:05 PM)

I pose this as a serious question and not one of disrespect.  What kind of person thinks he'll get respect from a group of people when the first thing he says to them that most of them are phonies.  Does the erect penis really drain so much blood from some people's brain that they can't think beyond the third-grade "I dare you" level.



VampireVixen -> RE: Are real Dommes extinct? (7/7/2006 2:45:08 PM)

Okay~I tried, but just couldn't pass this one up. While Miss Tress does cover it very well, I just had to add my two cents.  What my dear boy is your idea of a real Domme?  Someone who wants you at their feet 2/7.  This lifestyle is not Utopia.  Do you indeed search for a wife that does not want you to have a job to support her?  Yeah, again not Utopia dude.So you call yourself a lump of clay, oh hell yeah, bring that on over here...NOT!  And busting the balls of Pro Dommes.  Seriously!  First off, they have a lot of guts doing what they do, could you do it?  Doubtful!  Do you even realize the years upon years most Dommes put into this lifestyle?  More years than most go to college, wah, cry because they turn it into a career.  PLEASE!  By crying like a little girl, you have just proven yourself a baby and unworthy.  Should We in return ask for a real sub?  one that just already knows what to do?  Of course not, you want Us to teach you, hmmmm~teach me but expect nothing in return.  Yeah~okay~not going to happen.  Yes, I just had to say something.  Enjoy your stay on collar me my friend. lmao
Vixen

Had to add this~Yes, we are all extinct!  That's why there are websites such as this one!  [sm=ofcourse.gif]



SweetDommes -> RE: Are real Dommes extinct? (7/7/2006 2:47:42 PM)

*snickers at John's answer*

I agree with Tress - if I wanted a "lump of clay" I'd go to a ceramics shop.  But I don't - I want a boy who is willing and able to serve, who already knows how to serve (and if he wasn't already worthy, he wouldn't make it to the first meeting).  Now, this doesn't mean that he will know right off the bat, every nuance of how Holly and I prefer to be served, but he shouldn't be totally fucking clueless *looking pointedly at the OP* when he begins. 

We are lifestyle, non-pro (although, for all the bitching and moaning about pros, we've gotten tons of offers to pay us for our "time and effort" [sm=rolleyes.gif] ), and I know that there are plenty of others out there ... not to mention that just because someone is a pro that doesn't mean that they aren't looking for lifestyle as well.



MistressLorelei -> RE: Are real Dommes extinct? (7/7/2006 3:08:32 PM)

Nope... No 'real', Dommes around here... why would any Domina seek any sort of challenge or have a passion for this lifeestyle. 

I do however see a bunch of useless pieces of clay here and there, who come here to find 'real' Dommes who should quickly put on their finest leather catsuit and spiked heels, grab the whips and floggers and tell them how to position their clay asses... but only for a few hours til the free session is over and they can go back to their lives. 



yourMissTress -> RE: Are real Dommes extinct? (7/7/2006 3:16:11 PM)

For fucks sake!!!!  I'm supposed to have a catsuit and 6 inch spike heels?  I didn't see that anywhere in the manual. 
 
Where is the REAL sub that wrote the damn manual on how a REAL Domme is supposed to dress?  I need to have him sit under my queening table for 4 hours as punishment for this egregious error.  Oh, wait, maybe if the manual didn't give me correct instructions on how to dress, then the REAL punishments that were listed might be wrong as well....HELP!



MistressLorelei -> RE: Are real Dommes extinct? (7/7/2006 3:22:07 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: yourMissTress

For fucks sake!!!!  I'm supposed to have a catsuit and 6 inch spike heels?  I didn't see that anywhere in the manual. 
 
Where is the REAL sub that wrote the damn manual on how a REAL Domme is supposed to dress?  I need to have him sit under my queening table for 4 hours as punishment for this egregious error.  Oh, wait, maybe if the manual didn't give me correct instructions on how to dress, then the REAL punishments that were listed might be wrong as well....HELP!


I think Queening tables are only for the fake Dommes.... and punishments should be authorized ahead of time by the real submissives.  We have so much to learn... sigh.

<heads to the fetish store for 6 inch heels and a flogger>



gooddogbenji -> RE: Are real Dommes extinct? (7/7/2006 3:24:08 PM)

Wait.  I have 6 inch spike heels.  Does that make me a real Domme, or just a confused sub?

Yours,


benji



yourMissTress -> RE: Are real Dommes extinct? (7/7/2006 3:27:51 PM)

no benji, you are just in the wrong thread...you belong over there with the subs that want to be dressed like girls by ALL dommes...



SavageFaerie -> RE: Are real Dommes extinct? (7/7/2006 3:30:56 PM)

<fast reply>

I find if a bit surprising that the OP isn't a young whanker thats off school for the summer but a 52 yr old that that by now should have learned a little tact and decorum by now.



joyinslavery -> RE: Are real Dommes extinct? (7/7/2006 3:34:53 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: toptobottom

i pose this as a serious question and not one of disrespect. i have been wondering if there are any true Dommes who actually enjoy living the lifestyle and the challenge of taking a "lump of clay" and transforming him/her into someone worthy of service? i believe there is a sense of challenge for both parties - one of  accomplishment for the Domme, and one of true submission for the sub.  Yet looking both here and on other BDSM sites, i really don't see any Dommes seeking the challenge, the love of the lifestyle, the thrill of imposing Your will on another, or moving that person from a state of nothing to the real form of "sub."  What i do see are women wanting gifts and money in exchange for merely fulfilling a fantasy.  This just does not seem like the way of the lifestyle.  Please, if there are any Dommes out there who can shed some light on this subject, it would be greatly appreciated.  


Yeah toptobottom, I'd have to say, as a brother sub, that you're not getting off to a real good start here.  You're new and coming in here basically whining about something you probably really don't have a full understanding of.  I realize you're anxious but you're also (self-admittedly) really new.  Do you consider yourself a 'real' sub?  If you do, I'd strongly suggest some heavy reading for you.  Whether you do or don't, it's sure not a good idea coming in here and asking if there are any 'real' Dommes around!  Do you even know what a 'real' Domme is?  Step back, listen (read) more, talk (type) less and take time to understand what's going on here before complaining.  This is only your third post.  Spend time here on the boards reading and listening to what others are saying.  Educate yourself first.  No, this site isn't perfect but neither is anyplace else.  Slow down and look around.  I know it's hard but most of us had to learn to do it.  With knowledge will come understanding and there's a LOT to learn.  I know because I'm only now just getting started. Slow your roll man! 



crdavis -> RE: Are real Dommes extinct? (7/7/2006 3:36:29 PM)

I have had subs write to me asking for a picture of me in my fetish wear, to show I am real.  I tell them I am very real and if you want the fetish wear perhaps it is a Pro you are looking for.  No 6 inch heels here......Most subs do not have a clue.  Especially the ones that want to be "trained". 
Just my opinion.....

oh, and I love reading the postings from benji.....they bring a smile to my face



joyinslavery -> RE: Are real Dommes extinct? (7/7/2006 3:46:52 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: SavageFaerie

<fast reply>

I find if a bit surprising that the OP isn't a young whanker thats off school for the summer but a 52 yr old that that by now should have learned a little tact and decorum by now.


Savage, if I may, I would (respectfully) suggest that perhaps it is that his age is the very reason.  Of course this is conjecture but I suspect that the OP's age is perhaps the reason for the need to 'rush' to find this thing that, as he says in his profile, is something he's thought about for a long time.  I think when there is the pressure of time (backwards or forward) coupled with a delayed acting upon inner feelings/desires, the result is often that rush for experience that can result in fumbling, mistakes etc.  To the OP, I would add that this can also be a dangerous time for you.  Don't do things you would not ordinarilly do just because you feel that pressure of time and unrealized desires/needs.  As I mentioned before, this is the time to step back, take a breath and think about what you're doing and the best way to go about it and the best way to go about it is to learn all you can first.  The more knowledge you have the better.  Believe me...I've made my own stupid mistakes (and still do). 



GoddessDustyGold -> RE: Are real Dommes extinct? (7/7/2006 3:57:09 PM)

To the OP:  If you ever come back, and this isn't a hit and run...
Please take what we have said to heart, and try not to get defensive.  I am just re-reading this, and the boy is, by his own admission in his profile, brand new.
I envision that he (if he is 52 and not a school boy lying through his teeth) and older man who did some reading at castlerealm, got a romantic notion in his head and some extra blood to his penis, and put up a profile.  Then he spent a couple of hours browsing profiles and read the word tribute 27 times, got disillusioned and came to the boards to ask what he percieved to be a valid question.  He tried on his very first day here with the other thread, and no Domina's  replied.  I am worried that he will come back tomorrow morning, since he is offline, and has been all this time, and may be all excited to see several responses, only to get angry when he reads them. 
toptobottom (that screen names gives Me pause...were you a top and now you're a bottom, do you top from the bottom...what?), the best thing to do is take your licks and then stick around and read and figure out what really goes on.  You may be the perfect boy for some lucky Lady, but you have quite a bit of learning to do yet.



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