Finding and keeping

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Finding and keeping - 11/21/2004 5:24:58 PM

martyh01

Posts: 8
Joined: 10/15/2004
Status: offline

How does one find a good sub / slave when found what is she looking for and how to keep her happy????????

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RE: Finding and keeping - 11/22/2004 12:07:20 AM

Estring

Posts: 3314
Joined: 1/1/2004
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Be honest. And know what you're doing.

(in reply to martyh01)

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RE: Finding and keeping - 11/22/2004 8:21:42 AM

perverseangelic

Posts: 2625
Joined: 2/2/2004
From: Davis, Ca
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Estring

Be honest. And know what you're doing.

Or be honest about not knowing what you're doing and willing to learn and be taught by someone who -does- know.

_____________________________

~in the begining it is always dark~

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RE: Finding and keeping - 11/22/2004 8:47:14 AM

willing2serve

Posts: 385
Joined: 4/6/2004
Status: offline

Very good aforementioned advice, and i might add, not always let the submissive know what you are doing, it's not good for us to know all at all times.....

Respectfully,
Willing2serve1
..

(in reply to perverseangelic)

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RE: Finding and keeping - 11/22/2004 1:12:25 PM

mydestinyunfolds

Posts: 8
Joined: 4/8/2004
Status: offline

Be honest.

First learn about what you want and need in a relationship.
I found out early that most people don't know what they truly want/need.
For example the Dom says he wants all of the sub but when the sub gives her all she is then perceived as being to clingy, needy ect.

Get inside the subs/slaves head and their body will follow.

Knowledge keeps us safe, so, as perverseangelic said be willing to learn.

_____________________________

"To capture her body may last only a night...capture her mind and she will be enslaved for eternity."

"i rather have a moment of extraordinary then a life times of ordinary."

(in reply to martyh01)

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RE: Finding and keeping - 11/22/2004 1:30:38 PM

cynnacent1

Posts: 340
Joined: 6/25/2004
From: Massachusetts
Status: offline

i agree with Estring's reply, along with all of the other's who have replied thus far.

Add to it all:

Know what you want & need, and communicate it.
Be sure to know what the sub wants & needs as well, encourage them to communicate. Be sure that each are capable ( and willing of course ) in providing what the other requires.
Build a relationship based on trust, respect and honor.

Knowledge + Communication + Trust, Respect & Honor = A Happy and Successful D/s relationship.

( ... It does HERE at least ...

)

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RE: Finding and keeping - 11/24/2004 1:01:37 AM

martyh01

Posts: 8
Joined: 10/15/2004
Status: offline

May i thank you all for your honest and frank answers i have taken all into account though i personaly like a sub to be "clingy" or 100% devoted that is my preference i suppose if you or your friend feel inclined you can view my profile here thanks M

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RE: Finding and keeping - 11/24/2004 10:35:52 AM

perverseangelic

Posts: 2625
Joined: 2/2/2004
From: Davis, Ca
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I think Destiny was just trying to say "be careful what you wish for, you might get it" :) Just be aware that what you want may not be exactly like you imagined it in your fantasies.

~sigh~ The realization that it's not is sometimes quite un-fun. :(

_____________________________

~in the begining it is always dark~

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RE: Finding and keeping - 11/25/2004 10:08:04 PM

harmony3709

Posts: 292
Joined: 11/15/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: mydestinyunfolds

First learn about what you want and need in a relationship.
I found out early that most people don't know what they truly want/need.
For example the Dom says he wants all of the sub but when the sub gives her all she is then perceived as being to clingy, needy ect.

I couldn't agree more with not knowing what they really want and I think this is a perfect example that occurs frequently. I think you need to be honest with yourself first and foremost to determine exactly what it is you really do want......not what you think a submissive wants to hear......and then of course wondering why the relationship didn't work.

harmony

(in reply to mydestinyunfolds)

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RE: Finding and keeping - 12/5/2004 3:58:50 AM

Wolfsbabygirlz

Posts: 37
Joined: 12/2/2004
Status: offline

greetings to you ..... My opinion & what works for me is simply thru trial and error...meeting as many as it takes till you know youve met the one for you. Then there's no questioning how to make her happy. when its right, everything comes naturally. I speak from personal experience, & after meeting many, & finding my perfect Dom. Every sub & Dom is unique so its impossible to have an answer to that. Many questions are only answered from within, yet too many times we look to others to find it.
Wolfsbabygirlz =)

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