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RE: The 15 minute date - 4/10/2014 9:47:55 PM

FriendlyMuppet

Posts: 171
Joined: 11/16/2010
From: Corpus Christi, Texas
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I'm kind of the opposite of this, which, believe it or not, is also a problem. I'm generally very shy on dates, especially when it comes to dealing with anything sexual. I know that sounds kind of strange, but I'm actually a pretty engaging person right up to the point that the conversation turns to sensual/sexual, and then I kind of really don't know what to say. And I've found that actually comes off almost as bad as the OP's circumstances, even though people may find that hard to believe. I've discovered most of the failures during meets like this occur because I avoid talking about sex, and even though women often tell me that would be something they'd find wonderful in an encounter, experience has told me otherwise.

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RE: The 15 minute date - 4/10/2014 10:25:27 PM

sexyred1

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Joined: 8/9/2007
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Honestly? I don't meet men who prefer texting over calling.

You cannot tell anything about someone thru texting,

I also find it hard to believe the accent of how he spoke to you, being a teacher, if he even was.

I have had some short dates, but they were usually because the guy lied about something and I caught on immediately, or just no chemistry.

If he really tried to show you his cock in Appleby's, that is a new low.

POF generally has a lot of frogs.

< Message edited by sexyred1 -- 4/10/2014 10:26:23 PM >

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Post #: 22

RE: The 15 minute date - 4/10/2014 10:48:21 PM

Greta75

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Sexyred, but this is if you are communicating non-stop back and forth throughout the day, texting is best.

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Post #: 23

RE: The 15 minute date - 4/10/2014 11:31:54 PM

FieryOpal

Posts: 2821
Joined: 12/8/2013
From: Maryland
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Greta75

Sexyred, but this is if you are communicating non-stop back and forth throughout the day, texting is best.

Oh, I love texting throughout the day since I'm not a phone person. I don't like sudden interruptions. I will call at strategic times just to make sure the dude's not married. Greta, the texting works out great for giving short, precise instructions. It's an extension of my screening process.

OMG, I've had tentative first dates where I've texted or called to say I'm en route, and then they won't stop texting me messages the whole drive--WTF! I'm driving, you idiot. I can't be reading text messages, much less texting back while I'm on the road. As much as I hate to abort a date after I've gotten dolled up and psyched with anticipation, this tells me the guy is all wrong, insecure and probably needy.

DangerousCurves, that was bad. But you know what's even worse? One date didn't inform me he was impotent until the end of our date. He didn't think it mattered since he thought Dommes don't fuck and only want oral worship. With another sub, I found out during the after-date CFNM-Clothed Female Naked Male "inspection." (Yes, they love to be ordered to strip down.) Another WTF? moment. After these two awful events last year, I thereupon lowered the top end of my age range accordingly, and found it necessary to start cam-verifying well in advance.

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Post #: 24

RE: The 15 minute date - 4/11/2014 5:01:06 AM

ChatteParfaitt

Posts: 6562
Joined: 3/22/2011
From: The t'aint of the Midwest -- Indiana
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FR:

Just so you know, there are *plenty* of guys who would act like this one did. They think having a big cock (in their mind) makes them irresistible, and are convinced that ALL submissive women want to fuck all day long and aren't too picky about who with.

This is an extremely well entrenched stereotype that many so called dom men share.

DC: If you get to the point of phone contact, first buy a burner so they don't know who you are. Let them call and call them, see if they have a pattern of not picking up at certain times, a good clue that wifey is home.

When you plan to meet, get *their* idea of how that should proceed -- it will tell you lots about their concern for keeping you safe. Anyone who suggests anything other than meeting in public and having a safe call is not concerned with building trust with you.

As the saying goes, you have to kiss a lot of frogs before you find your prince.

Best, CP

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Post #: 25

RE: The 15 minute date - 4/11/2014 5:30:08 AM

SinFix

Posts: 866
Joined: 4/1/2011
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OMG.. sounds a lot like most of the dates I've had in the past 4 years..

It doesn't seem to matter how much or how little conversation you have with guys or the type of conversation, their whole goal is to meet up at some point and try to score..

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Post #: 26

RE: The 15 minute date - 4/11/2014 5:34:36 AM

DarkSteven

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Joined: 5/2/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: DangerousCrves

@DarkSteven-

Just for the record re: Because. He. Is. Married. Himself. And he was testing you to see if you got offended that he was boinking married women. When you said you'd meet him anyway, he figured you were okay with him cheating.

He didn't tell me he was boinking married women at any time BEFORE the date. He said it during the date.

Before the date he never breathed a word of anything like this. Not once in any of our conversations was he sexual.

I should be clear that in the spirit of not boring the fuck out of everyone I did leave out some of the ill fated conversation with him. I can see how it might be misconstrued that he told me things before we met for a drink. However, aside from knowing his occupation I found out everything tonight..

So story edited for comedic effect. <3

Sorry for the timing. But I stand by him being married, and making up a story to test it on you.

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Post #: 27

RE: The 15 minute date - 4/11/2014 9:16:20 AM

DesFIP

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From: Apple County NY
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I don't believe in meeting in venues where alcohol is served. I'm betting he got there first and had several shots of liquid courage. And that contributed to his flaming asshole persona.

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RE: The 15 minute date - 4/11/2014 9:51:01 AM

hlen5

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quote:

ORIGINAL: DangerousCrves

Stay tuned I have a date next week. Let's see what kind of nutter HE is..

Don't let one squirrel color your judgement on your next date. Meet him with an open mind, he might be a perfect gentleman.

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Post #: 29

RE: The 15 minute date - 4/11/2014 10:58:06 AM

kalikshama

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DangerousCrves - good for you for being clear. A lot of women would have completed the date and then stopped taking his calls.

Best of luck with future dates.

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Post #: 30

RE: The 15 minute date - 4/11/2014 11:14:21 AM

ClassAct2006

Posts: 318
Joined: 4/12/2006
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I wonder what bit of your clear prior statement you were not after quick casual sex this supposed teacher did not understand? He doesn't found very bright. I wonder if he really is a teacher.

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Post #: 31

RE: The 15 minute date - 4/11/2014 12:17:42 PM

Rasciallymisty

Posts: 5749
Joined: 4/16/2012
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Here here SinFix , but I have only been doing the whole dating thing for about a year. I thought I was the only meeting these kinds of guys. I have not looking in my profile because I got tired of meeting the same kinds of jerk.

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Post #: 32

RE: The 15 minute date - 4/11/2014 1:27:29 PM

FieryOpal

Posts: 2821
Joined: 12/8/2013
From: Maryland
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quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

I don't believe in meeting in venues where alcohol is served. I'm betting he got there first and had several shots of liquid courage. And that contributed to his flaming asshole persona.

That's a good policy to have in place, for a woman's protection if she doesn't abstain from alcohol herself. How many of us (gals) have done something really stupid out of horniness because we had a couple drinks and then regretted it later?

On the other hand, since I can drink most men under the table - a combination of sipping slowly and a high-tolerance level to most any substance - I would rather see how a man behaves when his wall of inhibition starts crumbling, and he shows his true colors, even if they happen to be ugly. But that's just me--I wouldn't recommend this tactic for others.

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Post #: 33

RE: The 15 minute date - 4/11/2014 1:28:24 PM

mnottertail

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Well, by god, let's get drunk and see what happens....you can buy.

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Post #: 34

RE: The 15 minute date - 4/11/2014 1:34:58 PM

FieryOpal

Posts: 2821
Joined: 12/8/2013
From: Maryland
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quote:

ORIGINAL: mnottertail

Well, by god, let's get drunk and see what happens....you can buy.

DEAL BREAKER before we would ever get to the fun part!

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Post #: 35

RE: The 15 minute date - 4/11/2014 3:32:36 PM

MercTech

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Joined: 7/4/2006
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I still think it sounds like that fellow got a copy of "How to Pick Up Women" and all he could remember was the not to do list.

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Post #: 36

RE: The 15 minute date - 4/11/2014 3:34:32 PM

seekingreality

Posts: 599
Joined: 8/11/2011
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DangerousCrves

I met him on the patio. He was sitting and I was looking super fly in my cute sundress and little strappy heels.

Him (upon seeing me approach the table) "HMmmm damn gurllll....oh my damn you are fine"

Me (a bit shy..what?? it could happen) "Thank you..you must be Leo..pleasure to meet you"

Him: (goes in for a hug) Oh gurl it's a pleasure to meet you..I hope I'll be pleasuring you later on too! .

I'm surprised you lasted 15 minutes. If it were me, I'd have been telling Leo two sentences in: "Hold on, pal. This isn't a porno film. Treat me like a human being, not a blow-up sex doll. I'm happy to leave now or let you reboot and start over. Which do you prefer?"

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Post #: 37

RE: The 15 minute date - 4/11/2014 4:16:01 PM

JstAnotherSub

Posts: 6174
Status: offline

I read this thread last night, and I cancelled a date I had for tonight because I felt like too many voices in my head were telling me that this is how the date would have gone.

The voices have never misled me before, so if they were wrong this time, and I missed mr wonderful, I am good with that.

As for meeting where there is alcohol served, I love meeting at a fav bar of mine, when a band is playing that I like, because that way I am gonna have fun no matter what.

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Post #: 38

RE: The 15 minute date - 4/11/2014 4:53:01 PM

seekingOwnertoo

Posts: 1323
Joined: 8/1/2009
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Dunno what to say about this OP, except the guy was clearly a jerk (assuming, of course this is even 85% accurate, which, sorry OP, I do not know for sure).

Myself, I am a single man. One who does meet a Lady for elegant dinners at fine dining restaurants; particularly on a first meet!

I always make an effort to be charming, gracious, fun and a white knight, too! LOL Sometimes I run into Ladies who have issues of their own ... but that is another discussion.

Most often ... I and whomever I meet, have a great time on the first date. And it usually is a LOT more than 15 minutes.

Then too, I am NOT trying to get into bed on the first meet, either. Instead I am looking for mental connection and chemistry ... so I will buy into both of these comments below ...

quote:

ORIGINAL: ChatteParfaitt

FR:

Just so you know, there are *plenty* of guys who would act like this one did. They think having a big cock (in their mind) makes them irresistible, and are convinced that ALL submissive women want to fuck all day long and aren't too picky about who with.

This is an extremely well entrenched stereotype that many so called dom men share.

quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

Sorry for the timing. But I stand by him being married, and making up a story to test it on you.

Yet I will add ... the following is exactly the wrong method of dealing with the issue Cause JstAnotherSub could have missed Mr Wonderful!

The post below, reminds me of the story about an NFL GM, who changed his first round draft pick because of an article he read on the Internet ... ROFL ...

To which I think .... So what is wrong with your scouting?

quote:

ORIGINAL: JstAnotherSub

I read this thread last night, and I cancelled a date I had for tonight because I felt like too many voices in my head were telling me that this is how the date would have gone.

The voices have never misled me before, so if they were wrong this time, and I missed mr wonderful, I am good with that.

As for meeting where there is alcohol served, I love meeting at a fav bar of mine, when a band is playing that I like, because that way I am gonna have fun no matter what.

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Post #: 39

RE: The 15 minute date - 4/11/2014 4:54:03 PM

seekingreality

Posts: 599
Joined: 8/11/2011
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quote:

ORIGINAL: FieryOpal

- I would rather see how a man behaves when his wall of inhibition starts crumbling, and he shows his true colors, even if they happen to be ugly. But that's just me--I wouldn't recommend this tactic for others.

Personally, I don't think most people show their "true colors" when they're drink. They simply show one side of themselves that is no more or less true than when they are in different circumstances. We are all multi-faceted.

(in reply to FieryOpal)

Post #: 40

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