Scary Kinky Urges?

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

Scary Kinky Urges?

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> Scary Kinky Urges?

Page: [1] 2 next > >>

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

Scary Kinky Urges? - 4/18/2014 4:57:14 PM

SubishGirl

Posts: 3
Joined: 4/6/2014
Status: offline

Do any of you ever have kinky urges that scare you? Or embarrass you (not the good blushie type, but the kind that scares you)?

Are these things you want your partner to push, or do you just want to keep them hidden?

xoxo
Subish

Profile

Post #: 1

RE: Scary Kinky Urges? - 4/18/2014 5:13:47 PM

anniezz338

Posts: 1183
Joined: 8/17/2010
Status: offline

I have one that I keep hidden. I would like to try it at least once before I die. So, if I had a very strong relationship, I would hint at it and see how it goes. But it would have to be one helluva relationship.

_____________________________

I had become insane, with horrific lapses of sanity. Edgar Allen Poe

(in reply to SubishGirl)

Profile

Post #: 2

RE: Scary Kinky Urges? - 4/18/2014 5:45:16 PM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline

It's important to recognize the difference between reality and fantasy.

There are plenty of things that sound good in fantasy but that I know I wouldn't really like. So I don't go there.

But I'm not ashamed of any of my fantasies. They're fictional only, not real.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!

(in reply to anniezz338)

Profile

Post #: 3

RE: Scary Kinky Urges? - 4/18/2014 5:55:29 PM

StrongSpirit

Posts: 575
Joined: 4/10/2005
Status: offline

I have urges that I know are evil. If I was transported back in time to pre-civil War America I would either move to the south and take full advantage of the vicious laws of the time - or kill myself in shame for I know how evil such actions would be.

But luckily I know the difference between fantasy and reality. There are things I enjoy thinking and writing about that I have tried and found to do nothing in reality for me. Similarly many things I do in real life get me very hard in real life but are boring to write about.

Reality is not fantasy. Sometimes my fantasies scare me, but I know they are just fantasies.

(in reply to DesFIP)

Profile

Post #: 4

RE: Scary Kinky Urges? - 4/18/2014 6:03:36 PM

SweetAnise

Posts: 480
Joined: 8/23/2013
Status: offline

To the OP: I think everyone has a kinky fantasy that is extreme or scary but note...that if it is scary it may not be something to pursue in real life. Some scary fantasies are left exactly where they are in your head with a vibrator.

_____________________________

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us."-Marianne Williamson

(in reply to StrongSpirit)

Profile

Post #: 5

RE: Scary Kinky Urges? - 4/18/2014 6:41:44 PM

InHisHeart

Posts: 630
Joined: 3/22/2014
Status: offline

I wouldn't say scare me but some I know would not be safe for me to engage in so we don't make them a reality but they're exciting to think about. Master knows all my fantasies and urges, we know what ones he can push and what ones need to be left alone. I have one that we've talked about a few times that I do want him to push my limits on but he doesn't feel it would be emotionally safe for me and his final word on it is no.

_____________________________

I don't have a bucket list but my fucket list is a mile long.

I would rather have a mind opened by wonder than one closed by belief.

(in reply to SubishGirl)

Profile

Post #: 6

RE: Scary Kinky Urges? - 4/18/2014 9:39:28 PM

sandyTheSub

Posts: 24
Joined: 4/13/2014
Status: offline

Many people who are into humiliation have urges that embaress them :p
At the end of the day, I think most people want their partner to push for those hidden desires. But it can be very hard to admit them.

I think it is very different for Doms and subs. A sub can have very easily hidden desires that they never ask for and just dream about on their own. For most subs asking for particular things can be very tough, I know it is for me.
With Doms I think it is similar but not exactly the same. Doms are more skilled in expressing their needs and wants, though they are not protected from feeling ashamed of them and don't dare asking for them. Sometimes I think Doms don't get enough credit for their control and their ability to protect their sub (even sometimes from themselves).

(in reply to InHisHeart)

Profile

Post #: 7

RE: Scary Kinky Urges? - 4/19/2014 12:57:06 AM

Nakhla

Posts: 104
Joined: 10/24/2012
Status: offline

In short: no.

I don't really understand why horror movies are considered acceptable entertainment yet having sexual fantasies that many would put in that genre are considered disturbing.

My mind goes all the way down the rabbit hole when it comes to depraved thought, but there is an extremely limited selection ( if we we're speaking of what's possible, rather than what's practiced in the BDSM community ) I'd be willing to engage in.

Again, it's not limited to us. Just today I was being serenaded by an extremely obnoxious street-corner busker - I had a brief thought of pushing the guy into traffic. Did I? No. Would I ever? No. Do I feel bad for thinking so? Not really.

Fantasy worlds are safe places to do anything. So, don't feel bad the next time you commit genocide on the Care Bears, it doesn't make you a bad person per se.

_____________________________

Submediant In Search Of Dominant Resolution... Formerly WestBaySlave on these forums.

(in reply to SubishGirl)

Profile

Post #: 8

RE: Scary Kinky Urges? - 4/19/2014 1:13:51 AM

maxcatt

Posts: 6
Joined: 4/2/2014
Status: offline

I don't have many kinks, but one of the few I do have definitely scares me a good bit. But I guess that's part of it, as I don't exactly want it left as just a fantasy either.

(in reply to Nakhla)

Profile

Post #: 9

RE: Scary Kinky Urges? - 4/19/2014 7:56:59 PM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline

Then figure out exactly what parts of it are the ones that get you hot, and then figure out how to play with those parts safely. For many people, just talking it out is enough. So someone that is relationship monogamous but in fantasies does gangbangs might enjoy a partner talking about how he's going to set one up. While both know this is never going to happen.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!

(in reply to maxcatt)

Profile

Post #: 10

RE: Scary Kinky Urges? - 4/22/2014 6:33:12 PM

Darkdog

Posts: 29
Joined: 6/30/2005
Status: offline

Scary urges?

Talk to Dexter.
His Dark Passenger was always urging him on...

(in reply to DesFIP)

Profile

Post #: 11

RE: Scary Kinky Urges? - 4/22/2014 9:15:53 PM

shiftyw

Posts: 2837
Joined: 6/6/2013
From: The Shire
Status: offline

Yes. I think gangbangs are hot, like big stranger gangbangs, with lots of kink involved.
I don't think I could handle it though in reality. I'd probably have a complete breakdown and need a shit ton of therapy and alone time after, so I don't do it.
Even if I want to.
AND I don't do it even if my PARTNER wants to.

Its hot in my head, it'd be trauma out of it. Its important to know that about yourself.

(in reply to Darkdog)

Profile

Post #: 12

RE: Scary Kinky Urges? - 4/23/2014 11:14:55 AM

Maradium

Posts: 19
Joined: 2/1/2014
Status: offline

I want to cane a loving ass until it bleeds.
Is that kinky enough?

(in reply to shiftyw)

Profile

Post #: 13

RE: Scary Kinky Urges? - 4/23/2014 12:06:34 PM

Ravensnake

Posts: 146
Joined: 8/17/2008
Status: offline

This I can relate to. I'm into sex and submission, rough sex, force etc. and can only really enjoy sex that way.
Sometimes I think I'll allow things to go too far. Not so easy to control when you don't have a regular partner.
I'm always aware that just because I have limits, it doesn't follow that partners/clients will have the same ones.
If I'm not careful the nympho inside me could get me into more trouble than I can handle.

quote:

ORIGINAL: shiftyw

Yes. I think gangbangs are hot, like big stranger gangbangs, with lots of kink involved.
I don't think I could handle it though in reality. I'd probably have a complete breakdown and need a shit ton of therapy and alone time after, so I don't do it.
Even if I want to.
AND I don't do it even if my PARTNER wants to.

Its hot in my head, it'd be trauma out of it. Its important to know that about yourself.

_____________________________

Dont rattle your sabres at me as an introduction. Be polite and I'll respond in kind.

(in reply to shiftyw)

Profile

Post #: 14

RE: Scary Kinky Urges? - 4/27/2014 3:45:31 AM

RazTheKiller

Posts: 6
Joined: 4/27/2014
Status: offline

I've had "special" dreams of just beating up a larger male with my fists. You know that scene in fight club where Ed Norton's character beats the crap out of Jared Leto? Kinda like that but I'd be fighting Meatloaf's character. I'm pretty sure in real life I'd get my ass handed to me but in my fantasy I win.

(in reply to Ravensnake)

Profile

Post #: 15

RE: Scary Kinky Urges? - 4/29/2014 4:09:40 AM

metamorfosis

Posts: 1132
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SubishGirl
Do any of you ever have kinky urges that scare you? Or embarrass you (not the good blushie type, but the kind that scares you)?

Not really, but then my kinky urges are pretty tame. When I first got into BDSM, those urges did scare and embarass me.

_____________________________

Pam (aka gungadin09)

Forum Freak

(in reply to SubishGirl)

Profile

Post #: 16

RE: Scary Kinky Urges? - 4/29/2014 4:53:01 AM

FieryOpal

Posts: 2821
Joined: 12/8/2013
From: Maryland
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: metamorfosis

Not really, but then my kinky urges are pretty tame. When I first got into BDSM, those urges did scare and embarass me.

I would have to go along with the tameness aspect also. None of my urges ever scare me or have scared a partner of mine.
I'm not heavily into kink, and I don't do sado-masochism per se. Anything bordering close to that spectral area is so tame, it would barely register.

I can't say I've been embarrassed about my sexuality. I can be outspoken most often. It is what it is.
I'm more concerned about finding a compatible match who isn't all over the map with his fetishes, or who isn't into a bunch of heavy bondage and sensory deprivation.

_____________________________

Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage. - Lao Tzu
There is no remedy for love but to love more. - Thoreau

(in reply to metamorfosis)

Profile

Post #: 17

RE: Scary Kinky Urges? - 4/29/2014 10:31:01 AM

Bound4you1960

Posts: 6
Joined: 10/18/2013
Status: offline

Some of my submissive fantasies are things I'll probably never do. It's not gross, it's just the loss of that much control. My dominant fantasies are all fairly tame. My only fear is having a real freak on my hands and not wanting to go that far.

(in reply to FieryOpal)

Profile

Post #: 18

RE: Scary Kinky Urges? - 4/29/2014 11:50:18 AM

pompeii

Posts: 934
Joined: 1/4/2007
From: Silicon Valley, San Jose, California
Status: offline

My fantasy about owning a submissive slave girl coupled with the knowledge that absolute power corrupts absolutely, makes me afraid of what I'd do were I the king of the world!

(in reply to Bound4you1960)

Profile

Post #: 19

RE: Scary Kinky Urges? - 4/29/2014 11:22:42 PM

Abennett96

Posts: 1
Joined: 4/23/2014
Status: offline

I am embarrassed by my desire for any sub girl to wear a button up cardigan, no longer than waistlength, during play or punishment. Hasn't stopped me finding devious ways to make it happen without highlighting how important it is though! Not sure why i am enbarrassed by it!

(in reply to pompeii)

Profile

Post #: 20