DOMMES

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

DOMMES

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> DOMMES

Page: [1] 2 3 4 next > >>

Login

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

DOMMES - 4/29/2014 2:44:46 PM

needingrelease50

Posts: 7
Joined: 3/24/2014
Status: offline

Is it just me or are the majority of so called Dommes on this site just playing games? How can anyone expect someone to truly submit after only 2 emails back and forth? And what is up with this financial domination? Are their really fools that desire this? Does a true Domme block you just because you call them out for how they are acting and talking to a perfect stranger? Please help me understand this.

Post #: 1

RE: DOMMES - 4/29/2014 3:30:09 PM

Chwilfrydig

Posts: 156
Joined: 1/15/2014
Status: offline

Hi, needingrelease50 -

A Domme is She Who Is In Charge, and yes, IF SHE WANTS TO she can play games, ask men to submit immediately, request cash tributes, block you or anything else SHE wants to do.

YOU, on the other hand, get to choose if she is the one you want to submit to.

Try to stay optimistic - like the little child happily digging through a huge pile of manure in the barn. The one who says, "With all this sh!t, there MUST be a pony in here."

Good luck to you!

_____________________________

My username is Welsh for "curious".

(in reply to needingrelease50)

Post #: 2

RE: DOMMES - 4/29/2014 3:31:29 PM

NiceButMeanGirl

Posts: 2756
Joined: 11/4/2011
From: Bellingham, WA U.S.A.
Status: offline

Hi here needingrelease50.

I notice that you're profile is conveniently hidden so no one can check you out. I don't understand financial domination myself either & I probably never will. But, yes, there are those who desire financial slavery for whatever unimaginable(to me) reason(s). It's not only fiinDommes, there are also finslaves. To call them fools just because their kink is different than yours is, umm, rather judgmental don't you think? As for "true Dommes," there is no single real and true way to do anything, including being a Domme. Most likely they were blocking you because you were rude to them, as you were in your OP.

NBMG

_____________________________

I'm now SweetlySadistic1 on CollarSpace. NBMG is an old profile, please see my new one.

(in reply to needingrelease50)

Post #: 3

RE: DOMMES - 4/29/2014 6:40:10 PM

MissToYouRedux

Posts: 867
Joined: 1/23/2010
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: needingrelease50

.... Does a true Domme block you just because you call them out for how they are acting and talking to a perfect stranger? Please help me understand this.

I don't know about "true", but just think of it as shorthand for "We're not compatible". It's saving keystrokes.

_____________________________

- Miss Marie

(in reply to needingrelease50)

Post #: 4

RE: DOMMES - 4/29/2014 6:58:57 PM

nutache4u2

Posts: 3
Joined: 4/26/2014
Status: offline

Every Domme is different and I'm sure some here are serious and some are not. Life isn't fair, especially when you are inferior.

(in reply to MissToYouRedux)

Post #: 5

RE: DOMMES - 4/29/2014 7:06:38 PM

NiceButMeanGirl

Posts: 2756
Joined: 11/4/2011
From: Bellingham, WA U.S.A.
Status: offline

Nutache, you're too funny. lol

NBMG

_____________________________

I'm now SweetlySadistic1 on CollarSpace. NBMG is an old profile, please see my new one.

(in reply to nutache4u2)

Post #: 6

RE: DOMMES - 4/29/2014 7:20:22 PM

Tantriqu

Posts: 2026
Joined: 12/29/2006
Status: offline

And IRONY FONT: nothing says 'not a married do-me bottom/her wish is my command service sub' like a username of 'needing release' ;-)

_____________________________

"Then I did the simplest thing in the world. I leaned down... and kissed him. And the world cracked open." - Agnes de Mille

(in reply to NiceButMeanGirl)

Post #: 7

RE: DOMMES - 4/29/2014 7:53:45 PM

Sexyladydee

Posts: 60
Joined: 9/3/2009
Status: offline

Why did you expect a Domme to bow down to your way of thinking or doing things?

I'm not selfish, just stubborn and usually right.

Darkness isn't a place to hide, but a place to embrace. LadyDee

It's ass, gas or grass but no one rides for free. LadyDee's Dad (maybe he stole that one)

(in reply to Tantriqu)

Post #: 8

RE: DOMMES - 4/29/2014 9:59:22 PM

FieryOpal

Posts: 2821
Joined: 12/8/2013
From: Maryland
Status: offline

That would depend on how you define "playing games." Given how many fewer Dommes are on this site than subs, who's to say there aren't a lot of people who come onto kinky sites without the serious intention of finding a compatible partner. I will say this, pointedly:

1. How many Dommes would you estimate are married and come here to do their cyber cheating? How many (mostly) males on either side of the kneel or in between?

2. How many Dommes would you estimate come onto this site to peruse nekkid pics all day & night and don't bother to read a profile? How many would be males on either side of the kneel or in between?

3. How many Dommes leave one-word messages which say "Hi," and expect an enthusiastic response? Or get flooded with boiler-plated form letters?

4. How many Dommes who specify in their profile they are seeking a sub within a certain age range, specify a general geographic vicinity, specific attributes perhaps, make it clear that they don't cam, or other parameters get contacted by:

--- Non-submissives/slaves (Doms, switches, BDSM bottoms who are NOT subs, masochists who are NOT subs, fetishists who are NOT subs, fantasist wankers who are NOT subs, vanilla porn-addicts, etc.)
--- Other than the gender orientation they seek
--- Other than the sexual orientation they seek
--- Someone out in Bumfeck, Egypt claiming that she is their Dream Mistress they have been searching for all of their adult lives, and they want to relocate immediately to be owned the rest of their lives.
--- 25-year-olds and 65-year-olds who insist age makes no difference to them despite their being anywhere from 15-20 years under or over a specified age range.
--- Those who either don't bother to read profiles, nor take the time to write a short, personalized message, or leave out key words contained within said profiles in order to warrant a response to their initial contact message.
--- Those who believe they should always be the exception to the rule, no matter what, who can't take no for an answer, then end up getting blocked.
--- Males seeking a kink & fetish delivery system who lead with their kinks & fetishes instead of treating a Domme like a lady, as they should any other woman they contact on a singles site they are trying to impress.
--- Males with overly graphic main profile pics who mistakenly assume that a nude depiction of them, cock shots, bare ass shots, dick cages, and FemDom drawings and/or caricatures will somehow appeal to females, esp. Dommes.
--- Males with kink-specific or fetish-specific user names, or any other objectionable user name which shouts "do-me sub" as well as "It's all about me and following my script even though I'm pretending it's actually all about you."
--- "Subs" who are aping the obsequious behavior they've seen in FemDom porn and want to be Insta-Dommed, or call any & every Domme their "Mistress" or "Goddess" when that is NOT how we've indicated we want to be addressed.
--- "Subs" who start off by offering ridiculous amounts of money to have a bunch of nasty stuff done to them.
--- And on and on, ad nauseam and ad infinitum...

_____________________________

Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage. - Lao Tzu
There is no remedy for love but to love more. - Thoreau

(in reply to needingrelease50)

Post #: 9

RE: DOMMES - 4/29/2014 11:29:17 PM

thezeppo

Posts: 441
Joined: 11/15/2012
Status: offline

Well, I've had 3 and 4, I can't really speak to 1 and 2.

OP
To the best of my knowledge, there is demand for findomme. I wouldn't be surprised if supply outstripped that demand but that doesn't mean it isn't real, just that it isn't what you're looking for. Hide the profiles you don't want to see and eventually you might start to get somewhere.

(in reply to FieryOpal)

Post #: 10

RE: DOMMES - 5/1/2014 6:11:16 AM

Snitch

Posts: 105
Joined: 1/27/2013
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: nutache4u2

Every Domme is different and I'm sure some here are serious and some are not. Life isn't fair, especially when you are inferior.

Touche!

(in reply to nutache4u2)

Post #: 11

RE: DOMMES - 5/1/2014 6:38:29 AM

FieryOpal

Posts: 2821
Joined: 12/8/2013
From: Maryland
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: thezeppo

Well, I've had 3 and 4, I can't really speak to 1 and 2.

By #3 you must be referring to boiler-plated form letters. Yes, my male sub friends get those regularly from cyber-Dommes, and you have my sympathies. None of us must be exempt from getting spammed with Blitzkrieg marketing and impersonalized personal ads, it would appear.
Seriously, the lame "Hi" or "How are you?" message also appears on vanilla dating sites frequently, most often by awkward young men who have no business contacting a woman my age in the first place, when I have clearly indicated an age range nowhere close to theirs.

Re #4, I'm sure we all get contacted by people who don't fit our specs. I wasn't trying to give the impression that this only happens to Dommes, merely to illustrate how some subs may not get the response they're hoping for because they're barking up the wrong tree to begin with.

_____________________________

Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage. - Lao Tzu
There is no remedy for love but to love more. - Thoreau

(in reply to thezeppo)

Post #: 12

RE: DOMMES - 5/1/2014 7:13:24 AM

imtempting

Posts: 1280
Joined: 2/11/2005
Status: offline

Because there are a lot of dommes on this site who are up themselves and think subs are that desperate they will do anything to get a domme.

Edited to say before this turns into a war of words, I just hit quick reply.

< Message edited by imtempting -- 5/1/2014 7:14:34 AM >

(in reply to FieryOpal)

Post #: 13

RE: DOMMES - 5/1/2014 8:52:05 AM

FieryOpal

Posts: 2821
Joined: 12/8/2013
From: Maryland
Status: offline

And you are an expert in these matters, because...

Last week you were a 22-year-old bisexual female slave from Australia,
wanting to be a bimbo (before you hid yourself),

This week you are ostensibly a disgruntled male sub,

Next week you will be...
Hey, maybe next week you can pose as a Domme!

_____________________________

Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage. - Lao Tzu
There is no remedy for love but to love more. - Thoreau

(in reply to imtempting)

Post #: 14

RE: DOMMES - 5/1/2014 11:33:56 AM

mnottertail

Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline

OP, I am pretty sure it's just you.

_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30

(in reply to FieryOpal)

Post #: 15

RE: DOMMES - 5/1/2014 12:59:23 PM

thezeppo

Posts: 441
Joined: 11/15/2012
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: FieryOpal

By #3 you must be referring to boiler-plated form letters. Yes, my male sub friends get those regularly from cyber-Dommes, and you have my sympathies. None of us must be exempt from getting spammed with Blitzkrieg marketing and impersonalized personal ads, it would appear.
Seriously, the lame "Hi" or "How are you?" message also appears on vanilla dating sites frequently, most often by awkward young men who have no business contacting a woman my age in the first place, when I have clearly indicated an age range nowhere close to theirs.

Re #4, I'm sure we all get contacted by people who don't fit our specs. I wasn't trying to give the impression that this only happens to Dommes, merely to illustrate how some subs may not get the response they're hoping for because they're barking up the wrong tree to begin with.

Yes, I meant form letters. I get called 'slut' an awful lot by people I don't know as well, I must have developed a reputation from somewhere ;)

The other side can be bemusing to say the least, but it is what it is. There are many good people there, as well as a fair few less good people, some people who have blown their kinks totally out of proportion and some who are just downright imaginary. I've met some people that I like and there are posters here whose opinions I respect so its been a mostly positive experience for me and I pretty much just ignore what doesn't relate. Easier for me to do though, keeping on top of my email doesn't constitute a full-time job. To go back to the op, I think we all get contacted by people who don't even really care what our name is from time to time. There are successful couples who met through collarme so there is reason to be positive, but equally I wouldn't be putting all of my eggs in the collarme basket.

(in reply to FieryOpal)

Post #: 16

RE: DOMMES - 5/1/2014 1:45:22 PM

imtempting

Posts: 1280
Joined: 2/11/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: FieryOpal

And you are an expert in these matters, because...

Last week you were a 22-year-old bisexual female slave from Australia,
wanting to be a bimbo (before you hid yourself),

This week you are ostensibly a disgruntled male sub,

Next week you will be...
Hey, maybe next week you can pose as a Domme!

That's exactly why I'm an expert because I've seen it from all sides not just your one dimensional side.
I hid my profile because it means nothing and as I said before, I'm not looking. I have been here nearly ten years and I've seen a lot. Also, a lot of dommes don't like people attacking other chatters in the vain hope it will get them in their good books, just saying from experience.

(in reply to FieryOpal)

Post #: 17

RE: DOMMES - 5/1/2014 2:09:50 PM

stef

Posts: 10215
Joined: 1/26/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: imtempting

That's exactly why I'm an expert because I've seen it from all sides not just your one dimensional side.

Indeed. You're the only one who speaks the "truth" so you're the "expert". Unfortunately, your expertise seems to only center around misogyny.

_____________________________

Welcome to PoliticSpace! If you came here expecting meaningful BDSM discussions, boy are you in the wrong place.

"Hypocrisy has consequences"

(in reply to imtempting)

Post #: 18

RE: DOMMES - 5/1/2014 2:19:19 PM

mnottertail

Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline

This is not a multidimensional question, throw me in a frame of reference and lets get over the lack of gravity in the discourse.

_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30

(in reply to stef)

Post #: 19

RE: DOMMES - 5/1/2014 5:38:41 PM

FieryOpal

Posts: 2821
Joined: 12/8/2013
From: Maryland
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: needingrelease50

Is it just me or are the majority of so called Dommes on this site just playing games? How can anyone expect someone to truly submit after only 2 emails back and forth?...

It would be nice to know a little bit more about you if you want any helpful advice of a more specific nature in your case. The 50 in your user name could signify your age or that you were born in 1950.
I believe that it's a prevalent "insider" tip that even our distinguished friend Mr. mnottertail will not dispute is that MANY of the female profiles on this site are not made by females at all, but by males posing as females.
These are Domme profiles, those of submissive women, whether straight, bi or lesbian. I've mentioned elsewhere that my lesbian friend who has been on this site for many years, gets contacted by males posing as lesbians more than half the time. She puts it at about 60%.

So yes, it is relevant whether someone posting on a thread weighing in an opinion - no matter how trite it is - is what they are purporting to be by inference or otherwise, or whether the poster is trolling.
It circles right back to OP's original question about game-playing.
Sorry to disappoint otter, but I actually maintain just one lifestyle Domme profile which doesn't change around as the mood suits me.

On the Insta-Domming issue, it's prudent for ANY submissive to immediately doubt the integrity of ANY Dominant who demands instant submission or tries to engage you in an instant D/s dynamic with them.
There is only one person who gets to call me his Mistress, and that is my sub--no one else.

(Ideally) as on any other site, both parties should be cordial, respectful, and recognize that we are individuals reaching out to one another to make a social connection, where common courtesy should prevail, unless and until someone has proved himself/herself untrustworthy.
Devote your attention, energy and efforts on more productive pursuits in being pro-active yourself, and don't lose hope as you're rounding the bend. You've only been here over a month; there ARE success stories, but some people have bided their time for years before meeting the right match. Have you gotten out into your community to attend any local munches? This might be a better route for you to follow.

_____________________________

Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage. - Lao Tzu
There is no remedy for love but to love more. - Thoreau

(in reply to needingrelease50)

Post #: 20

Page: [1] 2 3 4 next > >>

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> DOMMES

Page: [1] 2 3 4 next > >>

Jump to:

New Messages	No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages	Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages	Locked w/o New Messages

Post New Thread

Reply to Message

Post New Poll

Submit Vote

Delete My Own Post

Delete My Own Thread

Rate Posts

Collarchat.com © 2025

Terms of Service

0.109