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ORIGINAL: Greta75

quote:

ORIGINAL: mnottertail
Women are not your first language either, are they? She is about as female as they come. She's got all the moving parts and so on.

Didn't know she is female, I assume she is male because her nickname "thishereboi", I interpreted as, "Over here is a boy". Never looked at her profile.

Anyway, there is a huge difference in asking if that was her real hair colour. I mean, I have a girlfriend who is platinum blond au natural, and boys always ask her if it's dyed blond or is that her original colour, because it looks amazing, and it does.

But I know if the guy asked her if she was wearing wig or is that her real hair, she would take offense.

If thishereboi was a female, I highly doubt she would feel complimented if a man asked her if her hair was a wig. Because in female talk, if your hair looks like a wig, there is a negative connotation to it because wig is a artificial look.

As compared to, "Is that your real hair colour?" Usually it's asked with amazement and admiration.

I mean, I dare boys to try saying to any girl, "Are you wearing a weave? Your hair looks amazing!" Probably gets bitch slap ha.

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ORIGINAL: thishereboi

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ORIGINAL: freedomdwarf1

Not just transgendered girls.... biological females that present themselves as male-ish in most contexts too.

or lesbians

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ORIGINAL: mnottertail

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOh. Fuck You're right. Well, fuck all this noise, then, that one clown singer cut his BBC off, why don't you get it from him and sew it on (not like a weave, use a different stitch.) Then we don't gotta do this.

And change your name from Jen. LOL. Now I gotta see if you got a picture, and you are butch cut.


Me? I'm cut both ways, but that is gonna be another story out of another of my loser emails.

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ORIGINAL: MarieDomina

I agree with the OP. His email was offensive and rude!! I would have not appreciated it either. I would of not responded, ignored his ass AND blocked him!!

quote:

ORIGINAL: BeautifulLotus



***AM REPOSTING THIS FROM A DIFFERENT FORUM***

I just received the following message:

Thank you ever so much for the perve. I have eyefucked the shit out of your profile, I must confess. Exactly how many motherfuckers would I have to kill to own you? I am probably a little too extreme for you. (I can certainly live without beating up a girl), but the first order of our business would be for you to lose the weaves and wigs, and start a program for getting your hair natural, good looking thing like you. But the little I can see of you, you are really pretty.

You have a smile that is astonishing, as well.

To which, I replied:

Good Morning ***.
While I appreciate your interest, I believe we are too far away from one another.
Another thing:
Do not make assumptions about something for which you have no basis.
I DO NOT WEAR WIGS, WEAVES, HAIRPIECES OR ANY TYPE OF FAKE HAIR.
The hair is all mine, grown over a period of 5years, they are dreadlocks and it is part of being a proud, beautiful Black woman that I wear them.

This is always an issue when one is interested in dating across "racial lines". As a AA female, I am constantly being asked if I wear wigs/weaves, etc. Believe it or not, BLACK WOMEN CAN GROW THEIR OWN HAIR .
The problem comes from non-AA folks, that for so long, the concept of BLACK BEAUTY has/and continues to be a light-skinned female with long, straight flowing tresses. Point in case: Beyonce`.
She is continually held up as the quintessential idea of beauty. What most non-AA folks don't know about Beyonce` is that all that hair is FAKE. The color is fake, the texture is fake.
I am ME. I can be no other person. And in order for me to be the BEST ME I can be, I must accept myself in it's natural state. So this means, that I wear Dreadlocks. I take meticulous care of my hair, it is my crowning glory and I am proud of it.

So to go back to the original message and point I am going to make:
DO NOT MAKE ASSUMPTIONS. Ask questions. I was not only insulted, but this individual has now created an atmosphere where I do not even wish to hold conversation of any kind with him.
Besides, why on earth would I want to belong to someone who, without knowing me or even addressing me in a proper manner, would think that I would want to BELONG TO HIM when right off the bat HE'S TRYING TO CHANGE SOMETHING FUNDAMENTAL about me?
NO THANKS.
Asking a person about their grooming habits should be right up there with asking them what's their kink?

When a person takes this kind of attitude, it says: "I'M DOMINEERING. NOT DOMINANT". And I want no part of it.
And when one makes assumptions of such a nature THEY TRULY MAKE AN ASS(umption) of themselves.

Granted, he hurriedly sent an apology. But it's too late.
ONE NEVER GETS A SECOND CHANCE TO MAKE A FIRST IMPRESSION

Lotus

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ORIGINAL: mnottertail

Me and womens hair just ain't getting me done here is it, you got long hair, she has pretty REAL hair, I am bald, ain't nobody got a hair on their ass in this whole fuck-o-ree!!! I might as well become a gay bald man, cuz to say I am fuckin this whole thing up is akin in understatement as saying King Lear fell into a little pout.

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ORIGINAL: MarieDomina

I agree with the OP. His email was offensive and rude!! I would have not appreciated it either. I would of not responded, ignored his ass AND blocked him!!

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ORIGINAL: mnottertail

Please, quit torturing me about women's hair. I am already in sack cloth over this shit.

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ORIGINAL: Greta75

you literally told her what to do with her hair on first Hello Message!

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ORIGINAL: DesFIP

To be fair to Greta, although she is bilingual in English, the fact that it is her second language explains her missing this nuance.

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ORIGINAL: outlawphoto
In fairness to everyone involved, he did not tell her to do that. He was informing her that if she was to decide to be with him, that would be the first thing he would require of her.

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ORIGINAL: Greta75

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ORIGINAL: outlawphoto
In fairness to everyone involved, he did not tell her to do that. He was informing her that if she was to decide to be with him, that would be the first thing he would require of her.

To get rid of that hair that looks fake to him? That is a very terrible first expectation. Lol!