RE: Forced Bi

RE: Forced Bi (Full Version)

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ExiledTyrant -> RE: Forced Bi (9/18/2014 12:31:53 PM)
I don't think one true wayism is going to help. Going to a book to bolster your position is like a Scientologist using Hubbard's marketed fiction to prove the reality of Scientology. Understandably, books are a lovely resource, but I'm confident that you don't follow someone else's "way" to the letter, no matter how well written the book may be. You had ample opportunity to clarify your position, you chose not to. As I said, nothing is forced, we have no victims here, just volunteers.

SimplyMichael -> RE: Forced Bi (9/18/2014 12:41:15 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ExiledTyrant I don't think one true wayism is going to help. Going to a book to bolster your position is like a Scientologist using Hubbard's marketed fiction to prove the reality of Scientology. Understandably, books are a lovely resource, but I'm confident that you don't follow someone else's "way" to the letter, no matter how well written the book may be. You had ample opportunity to clarify your position, you chose not to. As I said, nothing is forced, we have no victims here, just volunteers. Kiss ass much? So, her posting that "it didn't use to be that way" with only her word for it is fine but my pointing out that pivotal influential books and authors were saying something very different 20 years ago is goofy? I hope the ass kissing gets you laid but sure as hell wouldn't work for me!

ExiledTyrant -> RE: Forced Bi (9/18/2014 12:43:35 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael quote: ORIGINAL: ExiledTyrant I don't think one true wayism is going to help. Going to a book to bolster your position is like a Scientologist using Hubbard's marketed fiction to prove the reality of Scientology. Understandably, books are a lovely resource, but I'm confident that you don't follow someone else's "way" to the letter, no matter how well written the book may be. You had ample opportunity to clarify your position, you chose not to. As I said, nothing is forced, we have no victims here, just volunteers. Kiss ass much? So, her posting that "it didn't use to be that way" with only her word for it is fine but my pointing out that pivotal influential books and authors were saying something very different 20 years ago is goofy? I hope the ass kissing gets you laid but sure as hell wouldn't work for me! Wow, Michael, you really should take a day or two and reevaluate what you're doing here. Jus sayin

SimplyMichael -> RE: Forced Bi (9/18/2014 12:45:29 PM)
yes, conversations with cartoon characters without the balls to have a profile is a rather giant waste of time so enjoy your sandbox, you win!

ExiledTyrant -> RE: Forced Bi (9/18/2014 12:48:44 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael yes, conversations with cartoon characters without the balls to have a profile is a rather giant waste of time so enjoy your sandbox, you win! Michael, it's not about winning or loosing. You've grabbed a hold onto this thing when you should've cut it loose pages ago. You're moving well beyond damage control and strait into self destruction. I don't want to see that happen to anyone.

crazyml -> RE: Forced Bi (9/18/2014 12:58:50 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael quote: ORIGINAL: ExiledTyrant I don't think one true wayism is going to help. Going to a book to bolster your position is like a Scientologist using Hubbard's marketed fiction to prove the reality of Scientology. Understandably, books are a lovely resource, but I'm confident that you don't follow someone else's "way" to the letter, no matter how well written the book may be. You had ample opportunity to clarify your position, you chose not to. As I said, nothing is forced, we have no victims here, just volunteers. Kiss ass much? So, her posting that "it didn't use to be that way" with only her word for it is fine but my pointing out that pivotal influential books and authors were saying something very different 20 years ago is goofy? I hope the ass kissing gets you laid but sure as hell wouldn't work for me! Leading by example eh? Fucking pitiful.

FieryOpal -> RE: Forced Bi (9/18/2014 1:12:07 PM)
~ Super FR ~ (Running out the door...) quote: ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael Kiss ass much? So, her posting that "it didn't use to be that way" with only her word for it is fine but my pointing out that pivotal influential books and authors were saying something very different 20 years ago is goofy? I hope the ass kissing gets you laid but sure as hell wouldn't work for me! You really have been away for a long time, because of all the forum posters around, ET could win the prize for "Least Likely to Kiss Ass, Without Himself Being an Asshat." But you have been here as long as MB has - 7 years - and I shouldn't have to point out that Maria is one of the most respected Dominants here. This is the only thread where you and I have perhaps gotten off on the wrong foot; no issues on any other ones. Nothing personal, and I shall admit to some bias on holding Dominants to a higher standard of ethical conduct. This isn't about who's right or who's wrong, or One True Way, or whether you've been referencing a book filled with misinformation over the past 20 years. There are new people being introduced to BDSM every single day. How can they trust anything anyone tells them unless we can agree on a few core fundamentals? 1. For starters, CONSENT IS KEY. There is no such thing as Consensual Non-Consent, or being "forced," only the illusion of it. 2. CONSENT CAN BE WITHDRAWN AT ANY TIME. DURING THE MIDDLE OF A SCENE. There is no rule that once you start, you must finish until the end. 3. ERGO, USE A SAFE WORD! (Whether you and your partner no longer find this necessary doesn't mean that newcomers should ever skip this step.) The rest of you can all dispute the rest, I don't give a flying feck one way or the other. But for an experienced Dominant to be clueless as to the above and oblivious to the difference between a Hard Limit=Off Limits Deal Breaker and a Soft Limit Hate/Repulsion, is inexcusable.

shiftyw -> RE: Forced Bi (9/18/2014 1:15:43 PM)
12 pages is just showing off.

MariaB -> RE: Forced Bi (9/18/2014 1:21:24 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael So, her posting that "it didn't use to be that way" with only her word for it is fine but my pointing out that pivotal influential books and authors were saying something very different 20 years ago is goofy? I'm not from America. We never had a book. We don't even have a leather family apart from the Hells Angel bikers. Our scene is possibly very different to yours but one thing I have carried with me through the years, (and believe it or not I've been around nearly as long as you have and have done just as many things as you have) is the common sense that was verbally handed down to me all those years ago. I have always understood what 'hard limits' mean and I've always understood what 'soft limits' mean but in the past few years, I believe that word has become un-clear. I do remember a time, in England, where a 'hard limit' was a seriously thought out and put in place thing. It wasn't a joke. People didn't say, "eating fish is my hard limit" or "death is my hard limit" and 'WE' the English scene knew that a hard limit was never pushed unless of course the submissive had a change of heart. We now hear plenty of people saying, "I had my hard limits pushed" a lot and the old fashioned me starts thinking... WTF?

thompsonx -> RE: Forced Bi (9/18/2014 1:34:06 PM)
ORIGINAL: shiftyw 12 pages is just showing off. You askd for ten...I got my half over the bridge.

littleladybug -> RE: Forced Bi (9/18/2014 1:36:20 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Blonderfluff I think the littleladybug reacted to Michael's post because she felt defensive. She's fairly new ( I think I read that) and full and complete submission is not her chosen dynamic. That is fine. She could have expressed that with less vitriol. Maybe she will come back after cooling off a bit. I hope she does. Interesting comment. I'm not "fairly new"....and can probably only be viewed as "new" in geological terms. I am just out of an 8 year committed relationship with a Dom, and before that was dabbling around for about 5-7 years. So, 15-16 years. I think that the term "defensive" is completely misguided here. I'm simply calling out an attitude that I think is wrong. Apparently, that doesn't fly with certain people here...but, so be it. As has been mentioned on this thread, SimplyMichael and I are not compatible. That might very well be the understatement of all of CollarSpace. Again, SO BE IT. I don't care. I'm looking at the words, not the person. It doesn't matter to me that people disagree with me. We're here, or so I thought, to actually TALK about issues. So, you hoped that I would come back, and here I am. Now, honestly, why SHOULD I change my position? I mean, aside from the idea that I should apparently agree with someone with a "reputation" here. Got anything else?

thompsonx -> RE: Forced Bi (9/18/2014 1:39:47 PM)
ORIGINAL: FieryOpal Nothing personal, and I shall admit to some bias on holding Dominants to a higher standard of ethical conduct. Higher than whom???submissives???switches???

Kaliko -> RE: Forced Bi (9/18/2014 1:43:24 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: shiftyw 12 pages is just showing off. Personally, I did not consent to reading 12 pages. 10 is usually my limit. My God, Michael, you are good. quote: ORIGINAL: lauren0221 FR - This discussion is interesting, and pulled me out of lurkerland. I am not bi, and I have been with a woman because someone I cared very much about pleasing desired it. It would have been a hard limit with anyone who did not know how to reach into my soul and make something I had no desire to do ever - something I was happy to do for him. Didn't turn me gay. Would take that kind of amazing connection for me to consider doing it again, and truly I would not want to be with someone who could not make something so not in my nature right and fulfilling. Very well said. Thank you for coming out of lurkerland to post this.

thompsonx -> RE: Forced Bi (9/18/2014 1:53:15 PM)
ORIGINAL: littleladybug As has been mentioned on this thread, SimplyMichael and I are not compatible. That might very well be the understatement of all of CollarSpace. Me thinks the lady doth protest too much[8\|] You are outspoken... he has a collection of gags. You are young... he's old and needs the exercise. Your profile says you are seeking advice... he is full of it. You are modest...he,not so much. It sounds like a contraplete to me.

NorthernGent -> RE: Forced Bi (9/18/2014 1:58:32 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: thompsonx your god sux. He's a wise man, Thompson. He realised that some sort of creature would feel the need to roll around in its own shite - so he invented dogs. Humans were meant for better things.

thompsonx -> RE: Forced Bi (9/18/2014 1:59:24 PM)
ORIGINAL: Kaliko Personally, I did not consent to reading 12 pages. 10 is usually my limit. My God, Michael, you are good. Wtf[sm=jaw.gif]...as howard hughs once said to kate "he is just an actor" someone else was filling up all the dead space with inane comments[:(]

smileforme50 -> RE: Forced Bi (9/18/2014 2:00:57 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: JstAnotherSub quote: ORIGINAL: thompsonx ORIGINAL: JstAnotherSub Please show me where I was "marginally better". I never said I didn't like what you were saying, I offered an idea of why I thought the misunderstanding happened, before it turned into a dick flappin contest between the two of you. Just as I was beginning to enjoy the quality of insults being hurled you came in and tried to throw the cold water of reason on something that is unreasonable...once again sucking the joy out of my life...now you stand accused of doing just the opposite. That ain't fair but it is pretty kewel[;)] Remember no good deed goes unpunished. Will a blowjob make it all better? That's a rhetorical question.....since we already know the answrr

littleladybug -> RE: Forced Bi (9/18/2014 2:01:43 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: thompsonx ORIGINAL: littleladybug As has been mentioned on this thread, SimplyMichael and I are not compatible. That might very well be the understatement of all of CollarSpace. Me thinks the lady doth protest too much[8\|] You are outspoken... he has a collection of gags. You are young... he's old and needs the exercise. Your profile says you are seeking advice... he is full of it. You are modest...he,not so much. It sounds like a contraplete to me. Wow....you've totally convinced me!! Thanks!! :D

MariaB -> RE: Forced Bi (9/18/2014 2:10:13 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: littleladybug So, you hoped that I would come back, and here I am. Now, honestly, why SHOULD I change my position? I mean, aside from the idea that I should apparently agree with someone with a "reputation" here. Got anything else? You shouldn't and you should voice your opinion in a debate but try and do it without getting personal. One of the things that absolutely drives me mad on the forums is the adamant dislike people get for a person because of something they once posted to a thread. You don't need to get personal, you just have to disagree. This means people often play it safe and this can make forum debates tame and tedious. If we all have to pussy foot around each other, how the hell will we ever put the world to rights?! [8D] I like Micheal, I hope he carries on posting. I haven't seen many of your posts but I get the impression you say it like it is! Personally I look forward to seeing your future posts and I can promise you this, whatever you say I won't hold it against you in the future [;)]

Kaliko -> RE: Forced Bi (9/18/2014 2:16:58 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: thompsonx ORIGINAL: Kaliko Personally, I did not consent to reading 12 pages. 10 is usually my limit. My God, Michael, you are good. ...as howard hughs once said to kate "he is just an actor" someone else was filling up all the dead space with inane comments[:(] Yes. I know. That's partly why the comment was funny. ...I thought.

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