FieryOpal
Posts: 2821
Joined: 12/8/2013
From: Maryland
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quote:
ORIGINAL: cloudboy
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As for the study: people who "get around" as opposed to "settle down" just might not be suited for LTRs in general. I also think men who sleep around have a very difficult time staying married and / or happily married.
This is worth taking into consideration, that those who take a less-than-lifetime-commitment approach to their intimate relationships to begin with may be predisposed to making unsuitable marital partners to begin with, due to either their own personal issues with honoring their commitments or else showing a general lack of loyalty (fidelity) in their interpersonal relationships. In other words, when the going gets rough, they will sooner bail than stick things out through thick & thin. (Within the context of friendship, these are your "fair weather" friends.)
Further, there are personalities who aren't "wired" for pair-bonding, for whatever reason(s). They may not be as selective as those of us who are, seeking mates who are Right-for-the-Moment (poor impulse control) instead of holding out for The Right One to come along with whom to (hopefully) spend the rest of their lives.
quote:
ORIGINAL: BenevolentM
I also recall a study that showed that people in societies where marriages are arranged are not unhappy for it. Arranged marriages are if I am not mistaken are often decided on economic grounds.
This rhetoric has been making the rounds for a long time. When asked, how many (socio-culturally conformist-inclined) couples in arranged marriages (which they're pretty much stuck with) will venture to say they are not happy? There is also a difference between ostensible contentment and actualized happiness. People often settle for contentment, their basic human needs being met and become complacent. For those persons, existing in a state of entropy is sufficient; for others, living in a state of syntropy is the only way to truly live a thriving life.
quote:
ORIGINAL: BenevolentM
With the advent of washing machines the services that women provide men are not as important as they once were. The need/demand for sex has remained the same or increased. It certainly hasn't decreased. Women now have a greater value to society offering their submission to a boss than to a husband. Likewise, their is a greater emphasis on their capacity to put out sexually. Ironic isn't it? When it was thought impossible for a husband to rape his wife, the pressure to put out sexually was minimal. Even a retarded male can operate a washing machine and unless the man is a homosexual or just not interested in sex women have a monopoly.
With all due respect, WTH is this supposed to mean? In which convoluted universe would your logic above apply? 
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Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage. - Lao Tzu
There is no remedy for love but to love more. - Thoreau
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