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ORIGINAL: HeartAndSoul31

I do deserve it back in my mind. I paid for it. It was meant for me. It was not a gift to him. I have asked for it back.

....I really have no idea if it is being used on someone else.

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ORIGINAL: HeartAndSoul31

Believe it or not, I was on the s side.

Yes I KNOW. live and learn. but.......................................ROAR.

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It might not be the case though, he might just need it for a memory. I will try to think the best.

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ORIGINAL: HeartAndSoul31

Believe it or not, I was on the s side.

Yes I KNOW. live and learn. but.......................................ROAR.

I will get over it but he certainly isn't entitled to it. It disgusts me to think of him using it on unsuspecting women.

It might not be the case though, he might just need it for a memory. I will try to think the best.

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ORIGINAL: FieryOpal

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ORIGINAL: HeartAndSoul31

I do deserve it back in my mind. I paid for it. It was meant for me. It was not a gift to him. I have asked for it back.

....I really have no idea if it is being used on someone else.

Good riddance to your former 4sshat Master.

First rule of thumb. Anything any man wants you to acquire, regardless of whether it benefits the both of you, he should foot the bill for (and put his money where his mouth, the true test of a man's honorable intent).

You were doing your ex-Master a favor by procuring the collar yourself. He should have provided you with the means to do so. That was his responsibility.

Unless there is some special custom-ordering involved, I always make sure I have a new collar ready for my sub. I have never made my sub obtain his own collar and would not have dreamt of doing so.

Part of the psychology of being collared is for the s-type to know beyond the shadow of a doubt that this collar is "on loan" and should his or her actions warrant it, s/he can get uncollared. The collar rightfully belongs to the Master or Mistress, not to their sub, because it should have procured by the Dominant party to begin with. (I brought up custom-ordering because I don't require that but my sub may wish to have his name or pet name engraved upon it, and he can cover the cost. Haven't run into that situation yet, but obviously in such an event, the collar would not be reusable, which it shouldn't be anyway.)

On principle, you are entitled to get your collar returned to you. In reality, you may as well just kiss it goodbye and chalk this up to a learning experience.

[Edited to correct pronoun]

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ORIGINAL: littleladybug

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ORIGINAL: HeartAndSoul31

Believe it or not, I was on the s side.

Yes I KNOW. live and learn. but.......................................ROAR.

I completely understand.

And, I do believe you were on the "s side"...it's just the way I read your post. And, perhaps, to go to FO's point, there was a reason *why* I read it that way.

IMO, there are certain underlying expectations regarding this issue. Not intending at all to rub salt in your wound, but there is something very "off" to me about an "M" type not only insisting that the s type gets their own collar, but also to keep it in their possession. I suppose I can imagine times when it would be kept in the M's possession, but the entire thing just reeks to me of you being used. Been there, done that, have a couple of t-shirts. LOL

That's why I said "live and learn". It's not just a throwaway. It's a way to move on from hurt like this. Chances are, you are not going to get the collar back, no matter what you do, and any further contact with him will give him power over you. The only thing you can change is the way you move forward from this. Kick yourself in the butt a couple of times, and move forward. Until such time as he starts paying rent to be in the thoughts in your head, don't let him in there freely.

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ORIGINAL: ChrchofDrk

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It might not be the case though, he might just need it for a memory. I will try to think the best.

Naw. He's using it on other s types *chuckles

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Kicking you in the butt!!!!!!!!!!!!

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ORIGINAL: ChrchofDrk

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Kicking you in the butt!!!!!!!!!!!!

you're such a tease