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RE: So how do you know who's fake? - 11/19/2014 7:46:18 AM   
Zonie63


Posts: 2826
Joined: 4/25/2011
From: The Old Pueblo
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: EmpressElsa

Before we can ask if someone is fake we must operationalize the word fake. In other words, how do you define fake?

Is she fake because she works as a professional Dominant? That is not fake, just different than someone who is strictly lifestyle. No need to get all pissy and use the block button, just say no and move on.

Is she fake because she is a financial Dominatrix? That is not fake, just different. Again, just say no and move on.

Is she fake because her ideas of BDSM is different than yours? That is not fake either, just different.

Is she fake because she is actually a man in disguise, then yes, "she" is fake LOL.


The internet is full of fakery, so there's always going to be a certain level of doubt about anything. I don't think there's any real way to know for certain just from looking at a profile.

I think in the context of this and similar sites, a "fake" might be defined as someone who labels oneself just for the sake of creating a profile, without it really being a true reflection of their desires or inner self. I suppose it's the difference between an actor playing a role onstage versus how they might be backstage when they're free to be themselves. "Fake" might be too harsh of a term, since that implies a deliberate attempt to deceive, although there are times when the term "artificial" might be more appropriate.

quote:


But for all the bitching that guys do about "fake" Dommes, we ladies wade neck deep through thousands of BS notes from males who think they are subs but are really just guys who are looking to get laid and never call again. I have lost count of the numbers of misogynists, selfish pricks, weirdos, clueless dumb asses, scammers, people who are too lazy to think for themselves, etc.


I've heard this complaint many times before in similar threads, although looking at it as a sub male, I find it difficult to fathom. It reminds me of this line from the movie The Untouchables:

Ness: Hey, wait a minute! What the hell kind of policemen you got in this god damn city? You just turned your back on an armed man.
Malone: You're a treasury officer.
Ness: How do you know that? I just told you that.
Malone: Who would claim to be that who was not? Hmm?


(in reply to EmpressElsa)
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RE: So how do you know who's fake? - 11/19/2014 8:00:43 AM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		In addition to talking about common vanilla interests, do something radical. Meet for coffee.

No play, no wearing fetish clothing, just go to Starbucks with a carnation in your buttonhole to recognize each other and have a cup of coffee together. If you don't like each other enough to continue, so what, you still got a mocha frappachino and a half hour sitting in a pleasant space. If you feel that is a waste of your time, then you're fake. Because you're incapable of simply enjoyment without someone catering to your fantasies 24/7.

And that's never going to happen.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

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RE: So how do you know who's fake? - 11/19/2014 8:48:26 AM   
Greta75


Posts: 9968
Joined: 2/6/2011
Status: offline 		I know men who calls every women fake whom he can't get her to sleep with

But for me, I think it's usually very obvious what's genuine and what's bullshit.

Anyway, it's funny how some men accuse me for being a male, because they cannot believe a female such as I exist.

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RE: So how do you know who's fake? - 11/19/2014 8:48:33 AM   
MissAelle


Posts: 17
Joined: 1/3/2014
Status: offline 		@DesFIP: And of cooooourse I read that as "a carnation in your butthole" without even reflecting over it...

< Message edited by MissAelle -- 11/19/2014 8:49:25 AM >

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RE: So how do you know who's fake? - 11/19/2014 8:58:35 AM   
ExiledTyrant


Posts: 4547
Joined: 12/9/2013
From: Exiled
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Greta75

I know men who calls every women fake whom he can't get her to sleep with

But for me, I think it's usually very obvious what's genuine and what's bullshit.

Anyway, it's funny how some men accuse me for being a male, because they cannot believe a female such as I exist.


The vanilla world is full of you.

_____________________________

Gnothi Seauton
To lead, first follow: Aurelius, Epictetus, Descartes, Sun Tzu, to name a few.

Semper fidelis (which sometimes feels like a burden)

(in reply to Greta75)
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RE: So how do you know who's fake? - 11/19/2014 9:01:43 AM   
Greta75


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quote:

ORIGINAL: ExiledTyrant
The vanilla world is full of you.

Tell other men that, so I stop being accused of being fake.

(in reply to ExiledTyrant)
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RE: So how do you know who's fake? - 11/19/2014 9:03:00 AM   
ExiledTyrant


Posts: 4547
Joined: 12/9/2013
From: Exiled
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Greta75


quote:

ORIGINAL: ExiledTyrant
The vanilla world is full of you.

Tell other men that, so I stop being accused of being fake.


They're calling you fake because they think you are their X wives fucking with them.

_____________________________

Gnothi Seauton
To lead, first follow: Aurelius, Epictetus, Descartes, Sun Tzu, to name a few.

Semper fidelis (which sometimes feels like a burden)

(in reply to Greta75)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: So how do you know who's fake? - 11/19/2014 9:03:52 AM   
Greta75


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Joined: 2/6/2011
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quote:

ORIGINAL: ExiledTyrant
They're calling you fake because they think you are their X wives fucking with them.

You are assuming they have X-wives.

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RE: So how do you know who's fake? - 11/19/2014 9:05:06 AM   
ExiledTyrant


Posts: 4547
Joined: 12/9/2013
From: Exiled
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Greta75


quote:

ORIGINAL: ExiledTyrant
They're calling you fake because they think you are their X wives fucking with them.

You are assuming they have X-wives.


As I said, the world is full of you.


_____________________________

Gnothi Seauton
To lead, first follow: Aurelius, Epictetus, Descartes, Sun Tzu, to name a few.

Semper fidelis (which sometimes feels like a burden)

(in reply to Greta75)
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RE: So how do you know who's fake? - 11/19/2014 9:06:10 AM   
sexyred1


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Joined: 8/9/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Greta75

I know men who calls every women fake whom he can't get her to sleep with

But for me, I think it's usually very obvious what's genuine and what's bullshit.

Anyway, it's funny how some men accuse me for being a male, because they cannot believe a female such as I exist.


Why do you feel that you are so unique?

I know tons of women who fuck who they want, when they want and use men for whatever they can get.

It's actually pretty commonplace.

(in reply to Greta75)
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RE: So how do you know who's fake? - 11/19/2014 9:06:51 AM   
Greta75


Posts: 9968
Joined: 2/6/2011
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quote:

ORIGINAL: ExiledTyrant
As I said, the world is full of you.

Women who do not want to be licked?
Good to know that men were the one who made up the crap that it's nirvana for women.

(in reply to ExiledTyrant)
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RE: So how do you know who's fake? - 11/19/2014 9:08:43 AM   
ExiledTyrant


Posts: 4547
Joined: 12/9/2013
From: Exiled
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Greta75


quote:

ORIGINAL: ExiledTyrant
As I said, the world is full of you.

Women who do not want to be licked?
Good to know that men were the one who made up the crap that it's nirvana for women.



[Redacted before Mod strike]


_____________________________

Gnothi Seauton
To lead, first follow: Aurelius, Epictetus, Descartes, Sun Tzu, to name a few.

Semper fidelis (which sometimes feels like a burden)

(in reply to Greta75)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: So how do you know who's fake? - 11/19/2014 9:09:17 AM   
Greta75


Posts: 9968
Joined: 2/6/2011
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quote:

ORIGINAL: sexyred1
Why do you feel that you are so unique?
I know tons of women who fuck who they want, when they want and use men for whatever they can get.
It's actually pretty commonplace.

We are all unique. Are you not unique?

(in reply to sexyred1)
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RE: So how do you know who's fake? - 11/19/2014 9:18:23 AM   
sexyred1


Posts: 8998
Joined: 8/9/2007
Status: offline 		Of course I am unique, but not egotistical enough to say "men cannot believe a female such as I exist".

Like I said if they cannot believe you exist then they don't know the many women who own their sexuality.

(in reply to Greta75)
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RE: So how do you know who's fake? - 11/19/2014 9:20:27 AM   
UnholyBear


Posts: 661
Joined: 10/19/2012
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Greta75

I know men who calls every women fake whom he can't get her to sleep with

But for me, I think it's usually very obvious what's genuine and what's bullshit.

Anyway, it's funny how some men accuse me for being a male, because they cannot believe a female such as I exist.



Yes though it is only genuine or bullshit according to how only you define the parameters to those terms. problem which I see is automatically labeling certain people as fakes when the reality is that person simply doesn't have the social skills nor the learned ability to approach a woman and even another man in a manner which is polite and non threatening.

Too often when I read the rants and the complaining about people who came on too strong and used the wrong approach automatically being labeled as "fake". I am curious to how you delineate that fine line between a man who hasn't the social skills yet from the men who aren't what they portray themselves to be?

Maybe it needed to be stated that everyone who started off in all this (meaning kink) have no bloody idea what to do, whee to start, what role they actually identified with, etc. That is a continual learning process. Think of it as growing pains.

_____________________________

Shameless flirt and just as unholy as ever!

Gauge's cuddlemuffin

CD's manwhore


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RE: So how do you know who's fake? - 11/19/2014 9:28:40 AM   
UnholyBear


Posts: 661
Joined: 10/19/2012
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Greta75

Anyway, it's funny how some men accuse me for being a male, because they cannot believe a female such as I exist.


Frankly the chances are these men simply don't have the acceptable social skills to politely communicate to women in general?


_____________________________

Shameless flirt and just as unholy as ever!

Gauge's cuddlemuffin

CD's manwhore


(in reply to Greta75)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: So how do you know who's fake? - 11/19/2014 9:29:32 AM   
Greta75


Posts: 9968
Joined: 2/6/2011
Status: offline
quote:

I am curious to how you delineate that fine line between a man who hasn't the social skills yet from the men who aren't what they portray themselves to be?


For man's side, they are trying to figure if the female is actually a female or a man masquerading as one. I'm always accused of being a male and not a female. One time, I explain to a dom that I was a bottom and not a sub, but I am unable to choose that option in CS, and he immediately called me fake because he said only gay men used the word "bottom". The other type of fake is of course, those woman who is trying to trick men into sending money and stuffs.

For my side, what I consider fake, are men just trying to start a conversation with me about what bdsm things I'm into, and they aren't serious about looking for sub, they are pretending, so they can get a conversation going, so they can start wanking to it. Basically, just looking for cyber talk to wank to, that's what a fake is. But it's a simple test for me, I just engage him in non-bdsm related discussion, and see how he reacts, most of the time, these men can't contribute anything or will keep trying to change it back to sex stuffs.

(in reply to UnholyBear)
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RE: So how do you know who's fake? - 11/19/2014 9:34:08 AM   
Gauge


Posts: 5689
Joined: 6/17/2005
Status: offline 		This is a fast reply.

To identify the fakes, it is tattooed on the back of their necks.

Or...

You put on these special sunglasses. And they get revealed for who they really are.

_____________________________

"For there is no folly of the beast of the earth which is not infinitely outdone by the madness of men." Herman Melville - Moby Dick

I'm wearing my chicken suit and humming La Marseillaise.

(in reply to UnholyBear)
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RE: So how do you know who's fake? - 11/19/2014 9:38:56 AM   
Greta75


Posts: 9968
Joined: 2/6/2011
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: UnholyBear
Frankly the chances are these men simply don't have the acceptable social skills to politely communicate to women in general?

It's often when it comes to the discussion of my sex drive and how many orgasms I can have, is when a man starts being incredulous and accusing me of being fake. This happens alot with vanilla guys. With dominants, not so much, as most of them are familiar with forced orgasms and should technically be knowledgable that women can have unlimited orgasms. I mean if they had a choice, then different woman will choose how many is enough before they want to stop. But if you don't give them a choice, and tied them and gag them, and basically take away their will from them, you can keep them orgasing for hours, making their body react against their will, for some it's becomes pure torture, for me, I enjoy that torture and always like to see how much further I can go. It's literally my main kink, orgasm endurance. But you know, sometimes you get men who's introduction to you is, I am great in bed, I made a woman orgase 20 times before. And it's like, huh? Just 20? That's nothing to brag about. I would probably say something which is not outlandish to me that, I need a minimum of 100 orgasms per session. Then the accusations of me being fake will come.


< Message edited by Greta75 -- 11/19/2014 9:45:44 AM >

(in reply to UnholyBear)
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RE: So how do you know who's fake? - 11/19/2014 9:41:07 AM   
UnholyBear


Posts: 661
Joined: 10/19/2012
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Greta75

quote:

I am curious to how you delineate that fine line between a man who hasn't the social skills yet from the men who aren't what they portray themselves to be?


For man's side, they are trying to figure if the female is actually a female or a man masquerading as one. I'm always accused of being a male and not a female. One time, I explain to a dom that I was a bottom and not a sub, but I am unable to choose that option in CS, and he immediately called me fake because he said only gay men used the word "bottom". The other type of fake is of course, those woman who is trying to trick men into sending money and stuffs.

For my side, what I consider fake, are men just trying to start a conversation with me about what bdsm things I'm into, and they aren't serious about looking for sub, they are pretending, so they can get a conversation going, so they can start wanking to it. Basically, just looking for cyber talk to wank to, that's what a fake is. But it's a simple test for me, I just engage him in non-bdsm related discussion, and see how he reacts, most of the time, these men can't contribute anything or will keep trying to change it back to sex stuffs.




Thanks for your reply. Maybe it's how my brain works as I still see this as a case of these men simply don't have the skills to interact with a woman, especially on forum sites such as this. I would have to presume that they are simply reacting to the fact that their approach was quickly shot down and instead of looking at their own actions, they blame the other person by calling them derogatory names, accusing the woman of being a man etc.

You would probably be surprised to know that many of us gay men also face that same garbage when we are approached by another and they assume that we are an easy conquest. The issue is, this is routinely found all across the board. My attitude towards idiots like that is viewing them as being immature and overall idiots.

_____________________________

Shameless flirt and just as unholy as ever!

Gauge's cuddlemuffin

CD's manwhore


(in reply to Greta75)
Profile   Post #: 40
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