Embarrassment - Subtle vs. Blatant

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

Embarrassment - Subtle vs. Blatant

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> Embarrassment - Subtle vs. Blatant

Page: [1]

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

Embarrassment - Subtle vs. Blatant - 1/4/2015 12:50:08 PM

HarmoniousProse

Posts: 7
Joined: 1/3/2015
Status: offline

Out of categorical wonderment, which version of doling out embarrassment typically has the most profound effect? I realize it's 'individual dependent', but would assume that for those that have given/received it, there are likely noteworthy observations.

I personally feel that my curiosities skew toward the subtle side, with a heavy leaning on the mental, cerebral, psychological, intelligence side. At this point, though, I'm not sure what all would constitute such discomfort. Which makes it a bit challenging to fill out the 'Curious About' section, profile wise, when relying purely on a novice imagination.

I would wager that, at the very least, a great deal of creativity needs to be involved; which is, when it comes down to it, what I appreciate most. The depth of thought that goes in to dealing with challenging trials and tribulations.

Profile

Post #: 1

RE: Embarrassment - Subtle vs. Blatant - 1/4/2015 9:17:44 PM

AAkasha

Posts: 4429
Joined: 11/27/2004
Status: offline

Effect on who...the dominant (arousal) or the sub (humiliation and/or arousal)?

If a sub 'requires' fairly extreme embarrassment or humiliation to be 'affected' then it's a bit more challenging. Subtle embarrassment can be extremely hot to me because it shows a man has a low threshold for his ego to be crushed a bit. I remember being a teenager and "making" my boyfriend allow me to spoon feed him ice cream in a parlor. He was so embarrassed, "What if someone sees this?" -- he endured, because I gave him some kind of carrot on a stick at the time. And I told him how excited it was making me.

Compare this to a man that needs to be "caught" in womens lingerie in public - by women he does not know -- like in a lingerie store dressing room, etc. Firstly, it's hard to set up and mostly will be a mindfuck (I have gotten girls I know to pretend they don't know me to pull it off - alas, it only works once). So much work goes into pulling off the task.

I don't get off on the level of extreme for the act - moreso, I get off on his discomfort, humiliation, shame. If I can achieve that in a subtle way (making him kneel in a public place as he desperately tries to come up with a reason he would be doing it), it's a sweet spot for me.

For me, though, it also depends on a lot on how he endures his shame and embarrassment. Extensive groveling and acting pathetic isn't a button pusher for me. Subtle shame is. That said, it comes down to chemistry.

Also, ironically, I do find there IS a a place for intense groveling, pathetic desperation with me - but it's in private, a "worked up to" space, in moments of total cruelty. I don't like "instant groveling worm, just add water" scenarios though. It seems too melodramatic.

Akasha

_____________________________

Akasha's Web - All original Femdom content since 1995
Don't email me here, email me at [email protected]

(in reply to HarmoniousProse)

Profile

Post #: 2

RE: Embarrassment - Subtle vs. Blatant - 1/5/2015 3:34:28 PM

FieryOpal

Posts: 2821
Joined: 12/8/2013
From: Maryland
Status: offline

You might want to check out these current threads on humiliation since embarrassment is a mild form of humiliation play. This is an emotional dynamic, and the subtle nuances of embarrassment should still not be undertaken frivolously no matter how seemingly vanilla they may appear. Consensuality and clearly (pre-)defined limits are constructs which have to be respected within your D/s relationship dynamic.

http://www.collarchat.com/m_4762196/tm.htm "Do masochists feel pain in the traditional sense?"
http://www.collarchat.com/m_4762525/tm.htm "Masochism: humiliation vs. physical pain"
http://www.collarchat.com/m_4762533/tm.htm "Sadism: humiliation vs. physical pain"
http://www.collarchat.com/m_4763358/tm.htm "Online Tasks (for Female)"
http://www.collarchat.com/m_4761107/tm.htm "Can you tell me...."

ETA: Link re Humiliation Play

< Message edited by FieryOpal -- 1/5/2015 3:42:11 PM >

_____________________________

Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage. - Lao Tzu
There is no remedy for love but to love more. - Thoreau

(in reply to HarmoniousProse)

Profile

Post #: 3

RE: Embarrassment - Subtle vs. Blatant - 1/21/2017 9:46:05 PM

OmniDom

Posts: 13
Joined: 7/25/2007
Status: offline

very inspired

(in reply to HarmoniousProse)

Profile

Post #: 4

RE: Embarrassment - Subtle vs. Blatant - 1/22/2017 12:31:18 AM

freedomdwarf1

Posts: 6845
Joined: 10/23/2012
Status: offline

You aren't supposed to resurrect necro threads.

And this isn't the first one.

Please make a note of the DATE before you post.
If you want to make a comment, make a new thread and link back to it.

For an old dominant who is supposed to be educated and in control, you are sure are dumb.

_____________________________

“If liberty means anything at all, it means the right to tell people what they do not want to hear.”

George Orwell, 1903-1950

(in reply to OmniDom)

Profile

Post #: 5

RE: Embarrassment - Subtle vs. Blatant - 1/22/2017 1:11:05 AM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

WTF is with the necro threads?

Is somebody really that bored?

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to freedomdwarf1)

Profile

Post #: 6

RE: Embarrassment - Subtle vs. Blatant - 1/22/2017 8:56:36 AM

stef

Posts: 10215
Joined: 1/26/2004
Status: offline

I think it's more stupidity than boredom.

_____________________________

Welcome to PoliticSpace! If you came here expecting meaningful BDSM discussions, boy are you in the wrong place.

"Hypocrisy has consequences"

(in reply to LadyPact)

Profile

Post #: 7

RE: Embarrassment - Subtle vs. Blatant - 1/22/2017 9:29:36 AM

MsLadySue

Posts: 2254
Joined: 12/18/2004
Status: offline

This dom (?) doesn't seem very intelligent when he is continually told he's responding to a 2 year old thread. Ooops forgot, all the blood has rushed to the other head which he thinks is the be all- end all of D/s.

< Message edited by MsLadySue -- 1/22/2017 9:30:59 AM >

_____________________________

In order for you to insult me, I would first have to value your opinion.
I love it when someone insults me. That means I don't have to be nice anymore.

(in reply to stef)

Profile

Post #: 8

RE: Embarrassment - Subtle vs. Blatant - 1/22/2017 9:34:19 AM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

I think he's just really excited to be here.

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to MsLadySue)

Profile

Post #: 9

RE: Embarrassment - Subtle vs. Blatant - 1/22/2017 1:49:45 PM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline

What's really odd is that the only threads he's resurrecting are by the same person.

Perhaps a sock?

< Message edited by DesFIP -- 1/22/2017 1:52:55 PM >

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!

(in reply to LadyPact)

Profile

Post #: 10