RE: Ask a sadist... fearful of your own sadism?

RE: Ask a sadist... fearful of your own sadism? (Full Version)

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sheisreeds -> RE: Ask a sadist... fearful of your own sadism? (1/17/2015 10:45:25 AM)
FieryOpal, I think your points are really important. I wouldn't call you a sadist either. I also doubt that anyone will ever call me a Master or a slave. I also know plenty of submissives to dominant sadists that aren't masochists. Though there tends to be stereotypes and assumptions which undercut some of the most wonderful parts of what we do. I also don't think that the kinky porn industry, and dungeons do much to help the cause. S&M is flashy and attracts a lot of attention, but the attention something gets doesn't define it's value or importance. quote: And oh my, how it changes the dynamics of the D/S side of the experience. All sorts of lovely leashes arise from that simple idea. Pulling this a bit out of context, my partner and I were discussing how our dynamic relates to bondage, and I replied that pain is my favorite form of restraint. Doesn't need to leave all sorts of nasty marks either. Just a few well placed pinches, and press a few pressure points, and he ain't going nowhere. Starts coming back to his senses? Just repeat. So much less effort than rope, and much more screaming. On a serious note: I always am concerned about unintended harm, and take full responsibility if it does happen. Risk Aware Consensual Kink, is just that. In my relationship accidents happen since were power struggle not neat and clean D/s. Even when well behaved accidents happen. I currently have a UTI thanks to sone pretty severe genital torture. My partner has been awesome in helping to take care of it. Though if he apologizes one more time, there's more than a little CBT in his future.

ansger -> RE: Ask a sadist... fearful of your own sadism? (1/26/2015 2:30:35 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: sheisreeds Pulling this a bit out of context, my partner and I were discussing how our dynamic relates to bondage, and I replied that pain is my favorite form of restraint. Doesn't need to leave all sorts of nasty marks either. Just a few well placed pinches, and press a few pressure points, and he ain't going nowhere. Starts coming back to his senses? Just repeat. So much less effort than rope, and much more screaming. That sounds awesome. So you are versed in pressure point techniques? That's interesting. And a kinda special kink of mine. In fact I admire sadistic women who are skilled in these things AND enjoy doing it as a part of kinky play (punishing, keeping the submissive docile or just for their fun). Admirable. Maybe because they know something special. And of course - as you mentioned - it's important to know your limits and to keep the play safe so a woman with these skills is also trustworthy in my opinion because she rather knows how far she can go.

Musicmystery -> RE: Ask a sadist... fearful of your own sadism? (1/26/2015 10:00:06 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: GotSteel I think this is where a meat space community really helps. Yeah...a lot of hams hoping to use their sausage to pork lambs who are looking for beef cake to eat their chicken, steak their claim, and bring home the bacon to their pretty filets.

GoddessManko -> RE: Ask a sadist... fearful of your own sadism? (1/26/2015 10:30:24 AM)
I agree with what Exiled said and my sentiments are those of RS. Limits is something I like to know early because everything outside of that is fair game. Giving me subtle hints of preferences without pandering or demanding would be best. The whole point is desired reaction for me. I always stress the importance of limits but you always hear the same generic answers until you probe further like "have you done this? have you done that?" I feel like it is a sub's responsibility to educate themselves on the vastness of the kink world or that responsibility lands squarely on our shoulders and it gets eye rolling. And to also not have expectations of how a Dom should and shouldn't do things in order to cater to a sub's desires. That is dependent on an individual personality, not a Dominant. Some people are Dominant but pleasers. Some people are Tops who are not Dominants and some people just enjoy kinky play. I require a power exchange and surrender.

HisDarlingDoll -> RE: Ask a sadist... fearful of your own sadism? (2/28/2015 7:18:13 PM)
Kana--absolute perfection. bravo! quote: ORIGINAL: Kana I was never scared of my sadism. I'd taken years of martial arts and was well versed in the fine art of hurting people. I did, however, worry tremendously as to what it said about me as a man, as a person and as a decent being. That was a long time ago though. Basically, the thing that changed everything was the realization that; A-Certain women, for whatever reason, are attracted and drawn to masochistic acts and interactions that seem abusive. That they are going to participate in these interactions because that's who and what they are and what they crave-they are drawn to such acts as a moth is to a light; B-I'm a decent guy. Not an asshole, not a diety, but a pretty good mofo. I have lots of experience and know what to do and how to do it yet, in a safe way, know how to still extract maximum pleasure/pain/humiliation/degradation ... as opposed to some real dangerous, ill-informed misogynistic fuckers out there. I also happen to be sane, which helps lots. Thus; C-I can actually help give a woman what she needs/craves/desires, yet do it in a not completely detrimental fashion, unlike most men on sites like this. Thus, instead of the common perspective which is that she's doing me some vast favor by submitting to me,* I'm actually the one doing her a solid by beating the fuck out of her. I'm the one who is helping her out, not the other way around. In fact, the slut should be more grateful-I may need to whip her harder... Yeah, that little tidbit only changed everything. Instead of being a twisted asshole, I was being a good guy. Not a black hat but a white hat. And oh my, how it changes the dynamics of the D/S side of the experience. All sorts of lovely leashes arise from that simple idea. *Can there be anything more pathetic than a wanna-Dom crawling and groveling to get someone to submit to them. "Pleeeeaaaaase, just be mine. I'll do whatever you want." Uhhh, dude, that's the polar opposite, not of what she wants, but whats she craves in her deepest soul. It's the one path doomed to failure

Mikhaelis -> RE: Ask a sadist... fearful of your own sadism? (3/4/2015 2:35:01 AM)
I am a sadist. I see a lot of people on here claim to be sadists, but listening to them talk shows they are just role playing according to some book or advice from some other ill equipped wannabe. I ENJOY and THRIVE on inflicting pain on others. I have since I was a very young child. I do not fault myself for this nor do I see it as some sort of character flaw. I do not fear it. It is who I am, just as there are others out there who need pain inflicted on them. It is primal, it is powerful, and it is who I am. Am I a bad person? No. DO my desires run dark and deep? Very. So when I see "loving", "romantic" "sadists" post on here it makes me retch in disgust.

orgasmdenial12 -> RE: Ask a sadist... fearful of your own sadism? (3/4/2015 4:33:08 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Mikhaelis I am a sadist. I see a lot of people on here claim to be sadists, but listening to them talk shows they are just role playing according to some book or advice from some other ill equipped wannabe. I ENJOY and THRIVE on inflicting pain on others. I have since I was a very young child. I do not fault myself for this nor do I see it as some sort of character flaw. I do not fear it. It is who I am, just as there are others out there who need pain inflicted on them. It is primal, it is powerful, and it is who I am. Am I a bad person? No. DO my desires run dark and deep? Very. So when I see "loving", "romantic" "sadists" post on here it makes me retch in disgust. Yeah, I know what you mean. I get the same feeling when people don't read the question properly and just use it as an excuse to brag about themselves. Life is tough, hey? :-)

Gauge -> RE: Ask a sadist... fearful of your own sadism? (3/4/2015 10:32:09 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Mikhaelis So when I see "loving", "romantic" "sadists" post on here it makes me retch in disgust. Because your way is Twue.

Lucylastic -> RE: Ask a sadist... fearful of your own sadism? (3/4/2015 10:36:40 AM)
wun twu wayism makes me retch ick ptooooey

Moderator3 -> RE: Ask a sadist... fearful of your own sadism? (3/4/2015 11:21:10 AM)
I wouldn't get too upset on this one folks. We are about done here. The thread can continue, but the inflammatory comments can be ignored so that the thread isn't hijacked. I could remove all the post and it isn't laziness that prevents that, but something else I am not getting into, but will keep my options open to that and anything you say in response would be lost if I remove anything. Thanks

stef -> RE: Ask a sadist... fearful of your own sadism? (3/4/2015 11:28:40 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Moderator3 I wouldn't get too upset on this one folks. I think you're confusing pointing and laughing with getting upset.

Moderator3 -> RE: Ask a sadist... fearful of your own sadism? (3/4/2015 11:46:06 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: stef quote: ORIGINAL: Moderator3 I wouldn't get too upset on this one folks. I think you're confusing pointing and laughing with getting upset. I think upset covers it. While you and some others may be pointing and laughing, others may be upset by inflammatory comments. Either way, I may have to come in and take some action and have to sit on these threads while I have other things to do on site. I would hope for and appreciate posters that would work with me. Anyway I can look at this, it is still a hijack, as is the continuance of this.

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