NookieNotes
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Joined: 11/10/2013 Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: cloudboy quote:
ORIGINAL: PeonForHer (God, those women's magazines appal me. Page after page of radical views about skinny models and their effects on young girls - accompanied by page after page of adverts with skinny models in them. And at the end, just when a woman's finished leafing through the magazine and feeling suitably ugly, fat and worthless - that's where 'salvatation' can be found in the shape of expensive make up, perfumes and even more expensive surgery. Those magazines are just designed to bash women, though they do it by first preening, stroking and generally seducing them greasily into the sucker punch. Disgusting, cynical, exploitative tat.) It's funny, really: all the stuff that I picked up as abstract theory over the years and never thought much about regarding females and females' experience of the world - that becomes suddenly real, just when you have your first daughter (or, in my case, and maybe a bit less so, when you have your first niece). You want to protect this girl, but there's no person who immediately presents himself to be given a punch. Not a nice feeling. [/ramble] That is dead on empathetic with what I'm saying. Not that I can or want to dictate responses -- but I was more looking for (1) acknowledgment of the huge woman's industry that affects how women think about themselves and (2) what your own experience has been with it. My sense is that woman are mostly desensitized to it and hence (here at least) say it's not a big deal. A guy as described above ^^^ can actually be quite sensitive (because he's looking at it with fresh eyes) to it while also knowing such forces are not and have not ever been so systemically directed at him. Anyway PEON, you described my own experience almost exactly. So, people often ask me my nationality. I say, "I don't know." They ask how can that be, appalled. I respond, " My mother was stranger raped, and she was adopted." All of a sudden, they are sorry for me and concerned that I don't know who I am. I have lived with it my whole life, and I'm cool with it. I'm still exactly who I was before they knew that little tidbit. I still enjoy my life as much as I always have. cloudboy, you are appalled, because all of this is just dawning on you. The women have lived with it our whole lives, and we have learned to handle it. It is a part of our growing-up culture. Yes, some women become looks-obessed and anorexic and so on. More than men. And yet, many do not. It is the way of the world that generally women are more focused on their own looks than men are. Period. That is part of why there are so many advertisements like that aimed at females, because women respond to them better than men do. So, you can be appalled all you want. It doesn't change what we're saying to you. quote:
(1) acknowledgment of the huge woman's industry that affects how women think about themselves How women think about themselves affects the huge women's industry more than it affects us. quote:
(2) what your own experience has been with it. As many of us have said, our experience is that we find our own comfort zone, and it works for us. It seems to me that you are simply overreacting to something you are unfamiliar with and have newly discovered. Like how Raleigh, NC reacts to snow, versus Buffalo, NY. Or American children drinking on their 21st birthday versus German kids of the same age with alcohol.
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